Reviews from

in the past


Overwatch porn= : )

Overwatch= : (

Hard to completely despise this despicable game because it's been polished to an absolute mirror shine through a lifetime of quality over quantity updates. Sadly, these updates were hyper-focused towards catering to the Elite Gamer demographic and far less towards the people who play games to have fun, and you're lying if you think there's no difference between the two. I went into this game at release hoping it would shape up to fit the hole in my heart left by Team Fortress 2, but Overwatch's walled garden content approach means the sheer user-created variety will never ever coalesce.
I'm not saying I'd love this game if it lets people make surf maps or play on servers with insane plugins - but I'd PROBABLY love it, if it even as much as let me set my spray to an animated gif of Konata Izumi.

My wildest hopes and dreams for Overwatch 2 begin and end at hoping they hired a writer this time. Overwatch trailers are seriously written like when you just press the middle suggested word on your phone keyboard. "We are heroes and we must protect this world because it is just the right thing to do and heroes must come together to do what is right and". I literally need to stop myself before I start talking about how good the TF2 comics were.

Some people make platformers without jumping

True geniuses make class-based FPS games, without fun classes

came to the realization this morning that i don't think i'll ever get the chance to play this again, a game so mid blizzard decided to wipe it from existence for the sake of a glorified balance patch. all i want is for some of these characters to get copy and pasted into literally anything else. hammond my beloved, my darling, why must you play with my heart like this

Opa! Fazia tempo que não escrevia aqui, mas voltei com Overwatch! Sim, deve estar lotado de reviews de OW recém criadas pelo “novo jogo“, e não vai ser diferente aqui não. Claro, se você estiver farto disso, melhor não continuar a descer a review, mas, caso esteja disposto a ler um pouquinho, obrigadinho ^ ^

Enfim, iniciaremos então a Review de Overwatch.
Overwatch, jogo esse que ganhou GOTY 2016 e conquistou milhões de pessoas ao redor do mundo com o carisma que o jogo possui. (Bom perceber que é possui, e não possuía.)

Um jogo 6v6 FPS diferencial dos outros, tendo classes para escolher sendo Tanque, Dano e Suporte. Cada uma com diversos personagens para conhecer e masterizar o aprendizado e a gameplay. O jogo foi um sucesso grandioso, isso tem mérito também por conta da mãe Blizzard. Ela investia (passado XD) no jogo pesadamente, com cutscenes animadas para enriquecer a lore do jogo, eventos festivos cheios de originalidade com skins únicas e modos únicos para a época do ano. ISSO SIM, era Overwatch. Um jogo super divertido e viciante. Eu mesmo um jogador que não sou fã de FPS ou jogos de arminha num geral, me encantei com esses personagens e a atmosfera do jogo.

Mas... porque o jogo decaiu? Fácil explicar os motivos.
Primeiramente, acima, eu disse que a “Blizzard investia“ no jogo. Coisa que não acontecia mais por MUITO tempo.
O jogo começou a viver de migalhas e os eventos originais e festivos que haviam, não existiam mais. Modos? Repetidos. Personagens novos? Não mesmo, nem sinal. Atualizações? Nop.

É, o jogo morreu.

Ver pessoas dizendo: “Dead Game“ era muito frequente, afinal, o jogo não recebia atualizações fazia ANOS. E jogos que possuem competitivo com milhões de players ativos e casuais também, DEVEM ter atualizações frequentes ou pelo menos terem atualizações que mudem algo no jogo para que os jogadores se mantenham dentro do game, coisa que não acontecia.

A qualidade do jogo era realmente absurda, tendo gráficos altíssimos e performance muito boa. Os eventos prendiam os players a cada atualização. Pena que tudo isso morreu com o passar do tempo, infelizmente. Overwatch era um dos jogos mais divertidos que já havia jogado, passei por muitos bons momentos com meus amigos, foi nesse grande jogo que fortaleci minhas amizades que hoje tenho como verdadeiras amizades.

Para encerrar, OW2 está aí! É o mesmo jogo 2, mas já que por ser o mesmo jogo e esse “mesmo jogo“ é grandioso, não tem como ser tããão ruim, claro que há coisas terríveis no segundo jogo, mas o primeiro jogo será memorável para mim.

Agradeço o tempo que você tirou para ler! ^ ^


A game tightly and intricately designed for hypothetical players rather than actual ones

You've no doubt heard countless people say that the only thing they like about Overwatch at this point is the porn.

However, I heavily disagree with those people because I am asexual and as such, I don't even like the porn.

Rest in piss bozo

Fun game to pick up with friends from time to time but I can't imagine playing this regularly purely because of that fucking hamster and his stupid ball

When the triple jump Genji was patched out, I knew it was over. Launch Overwatch was the most fun I had with a shooter, but it quickly went nowhere. After a year or two I was done with it and, in hindsight, that was the best decision I could have had. Spared some bitter feelings.

One small note: I don't really like the idea of monetizing a game I already paid 60 quids for. Thankfully it never went anywhere outside of games I don't usually play.

played a few matches before it died and it was a bit sad.

seen someone say this is why they don't want fighting games to become more eSports and yeah - imagine they shut down Street Fighter 3 when 4 came out? Bad End.

A fictional parody video game you'd see in a tv show or something, but it's real and it sucks. I fucking hated it when it came out and I feel so vindicated now. How this glorified SFM porn asset pack had as much cultural staying power as it did for so long is completely beyond me.

This game was birthed and murdered during the development cycle of Yandere Simulator

Watching blizzard try to balance their games is like watching a toddler trying to force two puzzle pieces together that clearly don't fit

its first year and a half meant the world to me a while back but nowdays i think about this game and get a headache so strong i need to gouge out my eyeballs

Attention. This is a pre-recorded message.

If you are reading this, it means that 2016's Game of the Year Overwatch servers closed down worldwide, for the best. The once fabled TF2 killer closing down when said game only received one major update.

The world shall experience peace like never before, for approximately 26:59:55 hours, until the launch of Overwatch 2.

Be happy. Prosper.

After dropping the game with 309 hours spent, seeing it get worse and worse, now banned user Maradona whose crimes were picking off-meta picks in casual matches still retains somewhat good memories despite it all.

Such as:

- 6 v 6 Winston only.
- Release Mccree.
- Lucioball.
- Pre-Nerf Roadhog in Ilinois.

Those shall permanently stay as fond ones.
That be it, hidden behind other extensively more painful ones

Such as:

- Shitty e-sports enforced meta
- Queerbaiting
- Literally everything about lootboxes
- "The Cosby room"

That's all. No end messages or anything. Just a brief passage. Like the game it represents.

Goodbye Overwatch.
Thank you for killing Blizzard's reputation forever.
We needed that.

>Devs bring new hero
>New hero fucks everything up
>Devs nerf new hero to death
>A month later the devs add a new Genji skin that costs 3000 in-game coins
>Repeat

Recently been playing this a decent bit (after over two years off) with some friends on PS4 and while I am moderately enjoying my time, I feel like it's very much a social experience where I turn off my brain and just giggle with some buddies than any kind of compelling, competitive or strategic multiplayer engagement. More like how watching paint dry with friends could possibly be fun, and even then there are times where it still pushes me into mind-numbing boredom as I go through one overwhelmingly one-sided steamroll into the next (whether I win or lose).

I feel like the mark of a good competitive FPS is that you're having fun even when you're losing. That push and pull between both sides in a constantly changing environment forcing both teams to adapt to each other's playstyles, forming new strategies as matches go on in order to secure wins. The tragic comedy of Overwatch is that even winning is made to be unsatisfying, primarily due to a roster so bafflingly unbalanced that it makes my head hurt.

You have characters like Junkrat who win by pressing and holding down one button and then get rewarded with an ultimate that's almost always GUARANTEED to get at least 3-4 kills in even the most braindead of player's hands, Roadhog who has one of the largest healthpools in the game, an easy one-shot kill on most squishies having a very small cooldown with his hook, and a SELF-HEAL THAT MAKES HIM TAKE 50% LESS DAMAGE, or Moira who can routinely out-heal other healers and out-damage the team's DPS despite being an incredibly low-skill cap character, it's unreal. Meanwhile a character like Cassidy's only saving grace, the flashbang (which Overwatch 2 bewilderingly strips him of), is on a ten second cooldown, and is easily baitable, boasts very low mobility, a mediocre healthpool, and struggles to get any mileage out of a very predictable, easily counterable ultimate. This feeling of being underpowered is taken to its most hilarious and exaggerated degree with the character of Widowmaker who, to paraphrase Dunkey's adept description of her for a sec, is the worst character in the game and has the worst ultimate in the game.

A lack of general polish and balance with this game's roster severely kneecaps any chance of that exhilarating push and pull I described earlier. You either steamroll the enemy or the enemy steamrolls you, that's it. There's very little fun to be had in decimating enemy teams and watching them scramble to group up and play for these boring ass objectives, all while the game clearly expects way too much cooperation and coordination from a team usually comprised mostly or entirely of randoms. And it goes without saying that being on the receiving end of these annihilations is anything but enjoyable.

So you've got a horrifically unbalanced cast of characters, with matches that very easily stagnate, feel tedious, and are ultimately unsatisfying to lose OR win, and you group all that with ABSURD queue times for competitive matches that regularly reach twelve, thirteen, and even FIFTEEN minutes? It all combines to make an FPS that, while I can still enjoy it with friends for some fleeting, mindless fun before getting frustrated or bored and hopping on something many times better, that's all it is. Fleeting and mindless. A game you play because it's the only thing you can play with your friends. It's not an experience with any real substance or value that'll stick with you after you put your controller down and turn your console off. It's only a matter of time before my friend group tires of it completely and drops it altogether.

ALSO I FUCKING HATE BLIZZARD HOLY FUCK.

There will never be a character as raw as Reaper ever again

warning!! this game was actually a secret psychological experiment to find out much pain humans could endure and still believe they were having fun! play at own risk!!!

Its fine I think, not really for me. The matchmaking time is a bit ridiculous. Thankful for all the porn it spawned tho

this game used to be so fucking fun but then they butchered it by changing the characters every damn week and trying to appeal to every single player

I haven't played this game but Tracer is a b-e-a-uty 😉
whistles 😙🎵🎶

Rule 34 😉 mmm mmm 😘

Dunno if I'll play it some day 🤷 Not into shooter games meself 🔫🔫 But I LOOOOOOVE 💖💖💖 TRACER!!!

mmmm... me luv tomboys... 😋 Yummy yum yum!!

Com o Overwatch 2 chegando e os servidores desse fechando eu resolvi jogar algumas partidas pra matar a saudade e encerrar o ciclo do Overwatch do jeito que ele é agora.

Eu amo Overwatch, o gameplay é fantástico e os personagens são sensacionais, era um jogo muito fresco numa epoca em que os multiplayers estavam saturados pra mim. Seus dois primeiros anos foram incríveis e sempre com aquela sensação de novidade e suporte da empresa, mas infelizmente sabe se lá porque a Blizzard parou de dar a mínima pro jogo com eventos repetidos e saturados, balanceamentos questionáveis, e claro, os vários personagens novos que quebraram o jogo e precisaram de vários patches pra "arrumar". Não é surpresa como tanta gente cansou do jogo e hoje ele é visto com um jogo "ruim". Sendo que claro, não é, ao menos em seu core.

Não boto muita fé que vai revitalizar a "franquia", mas eu torço para que a Blizzard acerte com o Overwatch 2 e consiga de volta a paixão que a galera tinha pelo jogo. O Free to play é uma decisão acertadíssima e só o tempo dirá por quanto tempo eles conseguem manter o jogo em evidência e com novidades.

used to play it alot. i was addicted to it so i got addicted to adderall instead and it fucking owns !!!! turns you into tracer real except not british frankly a goddamn improvement


i will always remember this game as the game that i had 1000+ hours of fun (+ some hours of pure STRESS, but it's okay lmao) and as the game i met and connected with my best friends back in 2016. not to be a total idiot, but it changed my life and i'm glad it did

Overwatch is just sad. I had someone generously gift me a spare key they had (somehow) of it, and proceeded to never play it. Why? This was year 1, when the game still looked promising, but around then they started spamming updates to "freshen the game up" and by that I mean keep slinging more queerbaiting characters at the game every time a new scandal came up, i.e. "The Cosby Room" or stealing breastmilk from a coworker etc.

Clips from this game were funny to watch for exactly a few months, then its legacy just became pornography, abuse scandals, mismanagement, flaccid development, players feeling alienated as more """"esports""" stuff is forced into casual queue (overlapping "esports" and "casual" isn't inherently bad, but this is far and away one of the worst executions of it) and probably the fastest drops off a cliff balance-wise I've ever seen from something being pumped with so much goddamn money.

It's just not fun watching friends be miserable playing this because their friends with less self-control keep roping them into it, what's weird is this one's $60 goddamn dollars and TF2 is $0. I feel bad for anyone who paid $60 for a beta test that lasted 6 years only to be met with the unfortunate truth that most betas do in fact reflect the final (AAA) product, but hey at least it's free, right? What a fucking travesty ActiBliz vomited onto the gaming landscape.

jeff kaplan spent years in a laboratory located in ohio to create the worst game of all time