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Gone Gold

Received 5+ likes on a review while featured on the front page

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Gained 100+ total review likes

GOTY '23

Participated in the 2023 Game of the Year Event

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Participated in the 2022 Game of the Year Event

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Played 250+ games

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Favorite Games

S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Anomaly
S.T.A.L.K.E.R.: Anomaly
Resident Evil 4
Resident Evil 4
Bloodborne
Bloodborne
Ghost Trick: Phantom Detective
Ghost Trick: Phantom Detective
Castlevania: Order of Ecclesia
Castlevania: Order of Ecclesia

326

Total Games Played

000

Played in 2024

062

Games Backloggd


Recently Played See More

Warhammer 40,000: Dawn of War - Winter Assault
Warhammer 40,000: Dawn of War - Winter Assault

Dec 04

Mega Man 4
Mega Man 4

Nov 19

Mega Man 6
Mega Man 6

Nov 14

Mega Man 5
Mega Man 5

Nov 08

Pizza Tower
Pizza Tower

Sep 25

Recently Reviewed See More

Ever since Grand Theft Auto 4, Rockstar has had a real fascination with creating technologically marvelous games with incredible sandbox potential, populating them with fun verbs and toys for the player to play with or use to interface with the world, and then implement arbitrary restrictions anywhere and everywhere to slap you on the wrist every time you try to have fun with any of it. This is all done in the name of Immersion. You see, the Houser brothers have Very Important, Very Mature stories to tell you, stories inspired by Michael Mann and Martin Scorcese films, so it's very important that Grand Theft Auto doesn't have jetpacks or parachutes anymore, that you don't do interesting things like attack Area 51 or steal tanks from the military, and that our cowboy game centers 90% of its mission design around Following A Guy On A Horse And Listening To Him Talk.

Red Dead Redemption 2, as with every Rockstar game now, feels like a game at war with itself. It offers you a wide open cowboy fantasy landscape teeming with wildlife, towns, and the folk who live in them. It lets you shoot guns and bows, hunt wild game, tie people up with lassos and drag them from horseback, tie them to train tracks, etc, etc. It lets you rob trains, rob stagecoaches, rob ordinary people and their shops, all intuitively done by simply pointing a gun at a guy and pressing a button. A good 90-95% of the verbs you use in RDR2 (and for that matter, any Rockstar game) are inherently villainous. It offers you unlimited potential for wacky cowboy antics, tinged with silly ragdoll physics and the unbridled cruelty that freeform gameplay allows for, and the moment you engage with any of it, the Fun Police spawn around you in infinite numbers until you ride out of the annoying fucking magic circle that continuously spits hostile NPCs from the ether just outside the draw distance because you dared to ask "what if I tried to have fun in the Mature Cowboy Game For Sophisticated Adults"

For decades, other developers have understood significantly better than Rockstar the fun inherent in mayhem - that the joy of a sandbox is in manipulating the sand, but sadly developers like Pandemic Studios and Volition have all gone under in 2023, taking with them their Mercenaries and their Saboteurs and their Saints Rows. Somehow, inexplicably, the guys who know the least about making a fun open world game continue to release these things year after year to maddening acclaim from the gaming press and the public alike and every time I try to engage with one of their games, I feel like I'm taking crazy pills. Is it so much to ask for a mission designed around something, you know... fun?

anyway this game is significantly better with a trainer installed mashes the ragdoll button until arthur collides with a horse and cart at mach 5, killing everyone in a 3 mile radius

The Imperial Guard is a super fun faction to play, and the opportunity to play as factions that are actually interesting (read: not the space marines) in the campaign is a big improvement over the base game, but the design in some of these missions is absolutely atrocious. I don't know who was smoking what when the decision was made to design Order Mission 4 around defending an AI-controlled vehicle that insists on driving itself into infinitely respawning enemy anti-vehicle units. I don't know whose idea it was to have your only recourse be a button on your commander you mash thirty times a second to say "PLEASE STOP DRIVING INTO LANDMINES, THANK YOU" until you can spam enough units to push through an infinite number of chaos horrors and heavy turrets, but it was probably the same guy who also thought it was a good idea to disable base building in the same mission.

Played for a few hours and immediately moved on to Dark Crusade. Didn't look back.

I really thought it would be a funny joke to play this on stream for some friends. I've come out the other side a little more depressed thinking about how you can make money off of something like this.

I think the worst part is the sincerity. If this had been a cynical half baked asset flip by a scam artist that'd be one thing, but I'm pretty sure this is a sincere, heartfelt project by a pair of German college students. I know everyone starts somewhere, but after 2 hours of poorly playtested first person jumping puzzles I'm left with only one thought: I think they should stop.