Recommended by Vee as part of this list.
I'm going to be the odd one out and give this a full one-star rating! This game is part platformer and part fighting game, and on both ends this game fails to give us something that feels even remotely competent.
You start with a platforming stage. You have a dinky punch and a kick with some range. The C button does nothing for now. Your walk speed is about the slowest I've seen in a game, but not to worry, you can hold up to fly around for like three seconds. While in the air, you'll realize that you aren't able to attack. Back to the level, get past a laser, kick tiny robots, fly over some obstacles on the ground, and after about 10 seconds you get to the first boss. Every boss is fought like it's a 1v1 fighting game, but all you have for offensive options is your two basic attacks. You still can't attack while flying, but you are invincible while doing it. You can also duck to stay invincible, but again you can't attack, so really what's the point? The AI sure does love to fly around and duck just to waste your time all the while the timer slowly ticks down. This is also a fighting system with no blocking. I resorted to getting really close to the boss and spamming punch until they went down.
After defeating the boss, you get sent to another platforming level. While here you'll find a level up container. These give you moves for the 1v1 parts and with this one in particular you obtain the most vital move, the double arm throw, which can be activated by pressing B and forward. I didn't mention this earlier, but in these 1v1 fights you have a stamina bar, and you need stamina to perform these moves (the throw requires five stamina). Stamina goes down as you take damage and recovers slowly over time. If your stamina bar drops to three, you can no longer attack, and if it gets below that you can't do a single thing! Thought you could fly around or duck to regain stamina? Nope, tough shit idiot. I recommend spamming the double arm throw. Eventually the opponent will get down to below three stamina, allowing you to slowly walk up to them, pick them up from the ground, and do another throw. Just get them in a loop, who gives shit! In the next platforming level, the C button finally has a function. Pressing C while holding forward allows you to dash. Finally, good mobility! I actually found this to be more of a burden than anything as I kept dashing into enemies or dashing then initiating flight, then flying right into a bomb or laser.
That's about all there is to this game. Shitty platforming with either a molasses-paced walking speed or a dash that's way too fast. Then it's one of the worst feeling fighters out there where the best option is to just spam throw. Double arm throw to be precise, because the enemy can counter your single arm throw. Lather, rinse, and repeat until you probably shut it off due to pure frustration and agony. There are technically no redeeming factors here; it plays like shit and looks like shit (music was fine) but the reason this is a whopping one-star instead of half is because I did have a few laughs. Any game that can make me laugh doesn't deserve a half-star. Those are reserved for pure, unadulterated time vampires.
I'm going to be the odd one out and give this a full one-star rating! This game is part platformer and part fighting game, and on both ends this game fails to give us something that feels even remotely competent.
You start with a platforming stage. You have a dinky punch and a kick with some range. The C button does nothing for now. Your walk speed is about the slowest I've seen in a game, but not to worry, you can hold up to fly around for like three seconds. While in the air, you'll realize that you aren't able to attack. Back to the level, get past a laser, kick tiny robots, fly over some obstacles on the ground, and after about 10 seconds you get to the first boss. Every boss is fought like it's a 1v1 fighting game, but all you have for offensive options is your two basic attacks. You still can't attack while flying, but you are invincible while doing it. You can also duck to stay invincible, but again you can't attack, so really what's the point? The AI sure does love to fly around and duck just to waste your time all the while the timer slowly ticks down. This is also a fighting system with no blocking. I resorted to getting really close to the boss and spamming punch until they went down.
After defeating the boss, you get sent to another platforming level. While here you'll find a level up container. These give you moves for the 1v1 parts and with this one in particular you obtain the most vital move, the double arm throw, which can be activated by pressing B and forward. I didn't mention this earlier, but in these 1v1 fights you have a stamina bar, and you need stamina to perform these moves (the throw requires five stamina). Stamina goes down as you take damage and recovers slowly over time. If your stamina bar drops to three, you can no longer attack, and if it gets below that you can't do a single thing! Thought you could fly around or duck to regain stamina? Nope, tough shit idiot. I recommend spamming the double arm throw. Eventually the opponent will get down to below three stamina, allowing you to slowly walk up to them, pick them up from the ground, and do another throw. Just get them in a loop, who gives shit! In the next platforming level, the C button finally has a function. Pressing C while holding forward allows you to dash. Finally, good mobility! I actually found this to be more of a burden than anything as I kept dashing into enemies or dashing then initiating flight, then flying right into a bomb or laser.
That's about all there is to this game. Shitty platforming with either a molasses-paced walking speed or a dash that's way too fast. Then it's one of the worst feeling fighters out there where the best option is to just spam throw. Double arm throw to be precise, because the enemy can counter your single arm throw. Lather, rinse, and repeat until you probably shut it off due to pure frustration and agony. There are technically no redeeming factors here; it plays like shit and looks like shit (music was fine) but the reason this is a whopping one-star instead of half is because I did have a few laughs. Any game that can make me laugh doesn't deserve a half-star. Those are reserved for pure, unadulterated time vampires.
Reviewed on Feb 28, 2023
4 Comments
I'm glad ya had a laugh with this one, I'm still thinking of the first time I fought the first boss and it responded to me getting behind it by just casually backfisting the shit out of me without looking. That goddamn vacuum cleaner thought it was cool as shit.
It's honestly shocking how many people seemed to have enjoyed this. I looked through YouTube comments on gameplay videos and found an alarming amount of people who have fond memories of this game.
@Vee It sure does feel like the bosses have a bigger hitbox than you. Oh well! Just hit em with the old double arm throw. They'll never see it coming.
Angel_Arle
1 year ago