Preface: The following letter makes more sense when you realize I originally rated this game a 3.5.

Dear Gamers,

It is with a heavy heart that I write this letter of resignation from the Worldwide Gamers Association. Due to my recent first playthrough of DMC 2, I have concluded that my opinions are not of any worth and that the label of "gamer" should not apply to someone with any sort of appreciation towards this game, such as myself. It was a short journey. One with brainless combat involving continuous pistol spamming, lack of interesting enemy variety, and bullet sponge bosses that just wanted to waste your time. But dammit if I didn't still have fun with it.

Honestly, it's a shame that this game wasn't longer, because maybe then I would have truly come to hate it. I mean, by Mission 14, I was starting to get a bit tired of it.... But then the game ended not long after. So yeah, I like this game. Hell, I was actually loving it at first. I am fully aware of the consequences in life that this public confession may lead to, but I hope this letter of resignation at the very least alleviates some peoples' anger and disgust.

Sincerely, SwitSwat (Former Based Gamer)

P.S. - Sorry, not sorry lmao

Update: Now that I have finished Lucia's playthrough, I'll lower my overall rating of the game. Playing as Lucia was definitely a more mediocre experience for me overall, though part of it is that it's just more of the same. However, in retrospect, it made me realize that Dante's playthrough wasn't as good, either. Lucia's underwater missions are especially bad. That one underwater boss (if yk, yk) is so annoying.

Honestly, if I had started with Lucia, I might have not been so quick to play through Dante's route, as it made the game's faults that much clearer to me. I'll go ahead and accept that DMC2 is a bad game, but I still think it gets too much hate. Its short playtime makes for an inoffensively OK and silly time for me. Of course, compared to the first game, it may as well amount to steaming garbage.

While it's a tragedy that this ended up being the final game that I completed in 2022, it feels strangely apt to end on such a sour note. I don't mean to sound like a pessimist, but I'll admit I haven't been in the right headspace for quite a few years now. 2022 was no different, and while I continue to grow as a person and learn to appreciate the little things in life, I'm still dealing with personal traumas and my subpar mental health as I go. But, how exactly is this relevant to Sonic Boom?

Well, every year I think to myself, "This will be my year. Great things await." But nope, every year is the same as the last. Certain ambitions and expectations that are ultimately shattered by disappointment. And that's what Sonic Boom is, really, and with a title like that, it seems highly appropriate. Rather than it being the smashing success that the team probably hoped it would be, it was an explosive failure that somehow managed to make Sonic 06 look competent. In a way, it also parallels the tiny bit of shattered hope I had of 2022 being good.

The funny thing is that I don't really have any major complaints. But it's such an incredibly bland experience that it feels insulting to even play. When I set out to finish every Sonic game, I never expected the series to reach such banal levels of insipid game design, despite knowing full well of this game's infamy. This was a game I could tell was going to be horrible within the first 10 seconds of actual gameplay.

Imagine this: You are running on rails through some uninspired floating roadway as is typical of these games, but suddenly the framerate drops to 15 through some loop or some other janky transition, all while Sonic says any of these phrases and more:

"Built for speed!"
"This is what speed looks like!"
"Can't slow Sonic down!"

As I reference a Nintendo Life article, former Sega of America producer Stephen Frost gave a few reasons for the game's failure, "one of which is that based on focus tests, people were "sick and tired" of Sonic going too fast and wanted to slow him down."

My guy, what the fuck are you talking about? Even if this was accurate, that doesn't also mean literally dropping the framerate. That's the power of CryEngine on Wii U, I guess. And no, I never expected this game to be anything more than somewhat mediocre, but truly, this is much worse than I could have imagined. At least the other bad Sonic games I've played were short enough and didn't subject you to 6 grueling hours of some piss poor excuse for entertainment.

So yeah, 2022 was not at all the year I hoped it would be, but there's always next year. To end on a more positive note, I have to admit that it was not all doom and gloom. There were actually a lot of great moments that happened this year, mostly involving time spent with family. As a coaster enthusiast, I was also able to get a lot of new credits. It's those small and joyful moments that make it worth pushing through life's harships. But anyway, here I am, with only a few minutes to go 'til the start of 2023, fireworks going off outside my window, finishing up this write-up. I am once again hoping 2023 will be my year, but even if it isn't, I can still look forward to the little things I'll certainly continue to enjoy out of life, and I can also find some solace in knowing that I won't ever have to touch this game ever again.

When I first gave this a shot many years ago, I felt very indifferent about it. For people who know me, it's no secret that a lot of the older FPS games I've played tend to get me motion sick. It may be a result of low FOV or low-res graphics. It just depends on the game, really. DOOM made me nauseous with its mix of pixelated graphics (which were no doubt impressive for its time), and maze-like level design that had me wanting to projectile vomit as I turned the same corner for the 10th time, completely lost.

Little did my dumbass younger self know, the game has a map! I recently decided to give this another shot, and after switching to a 4:3 aspect ratio and learning of said map, I was off, and I could not stop. Something about this game just works in a way that not even the 2016 reboot did for me (which I loved). I already knew just how influential this game was for the FPS genre, but I didn't really get it until now. Absolute peak level design, and with satisfyingly simple gameplay. Using the shotgun for most of my first run was pure ecstasy. These shotgun blasts felt somehow punchier and more satisfying than using any weapon in the modern DOOM games. I can already see myself replaying this every once in a while for funsies while trying new loadouts and hunting for more secrets.

It's raw, it's unhinged, it's freakin' DOOM, baby!

The Shores of Hell > Knee-Deep in the Dead > Inferno

If you had told me earlier this year, or anytime in the last few years for that matter, that I'd have a Kirby game in my top 10, let alone my top 5, I would laugh at your face and go back to gawking at Super Mario Galaxy. So, what happened here? How can a game from a franchise that has eluded my admiration for many years suddenly come out with a new entry that surpasses Galaxy as the king of 3D platformers?

To understand this, let's talk a bit about Mario Odyssey. Easily one of my most anticipated games when it was announced, and the main reason I wanted a Switch (not including BOTW since I could play it on my Wii U if I wanted to). While it ended up being a good game, it was ultimately a disappointment for me and a far cry from what I expected of it. This can be attributed to my general distaste for open world/sandbox games. When it comes to platformers, I prefer more traditional "reach the goal" level design. Ultimately, Odyssey kind of left a void in the Switch's exclusive library for me, where I was craving a great AAA 3D platformer, but there was none. And then came Forgotten Land...

I was very hesitant to even get this game because of how lukewarm I've been on the franchise up to this point. Sure, Robobot was pretty good, but seeing as it seemed to be a fan favorite, I was doubtful that Forgotten Land could barely be as good, let alone exceed it, especially since this was Kirby's first 3D outing. This was something that hadn't been done before, but all the good reviews + my friend's insistence finally got me to budge. I had no idea I would end up loving it as much as I did.

First of all, the presentation. It's a gorgeous game, even with the Switch's limitations. The world is vibrant and super charming, and despite its often-formulaic environmental design (you got your desert levels, ice levels, etc), they're still brimming with enough creativity to make it feel fresh. This extends beyond just the art direction and includes level and boss design, as well. They're fun! I could have done without the recycled mini bosses at times, but no biggie.

Kirby feels right at home in 3D, and if I had no prior knowledge, it would be hard to believe that this is the first 3D Kirby game. You still jump, float, suck, and transform with fun abilities. I especially love the new gimmick of Kirby sucking up objects to traverse terrain and/or access secret areas. I know people love to meme about "Car Kirby," but it is genuinely so much fun driving around as a car despite only being able to in short bursts on rare occasions.

For each land, you need to save an X number of Waddle-Dees to unlock the boss at the end of it. But each level has its fair share of bonus objectives that grant you more Waddle-Dees. The general short length of the levels makes it so that it's not at all tedious to go back and replay them for the sake of finding secrets and completing optional objectives you may have missed. There's also optional timed challenges scattered around the overworld that grants you "rare stones" which allow you to upgrade your abilities. And here lies the reason I prefer this game over Galaxy. The fact that I actually want to go for 100% in this game, and even beating the target times in these challenges (which do not count for 100%), says a lot. I'm not usually a completionist, even for games I really like, unless actual achievements/trophies are concerned.

Heck, as of writing this review, I still have a lengthy post-game to go through with tougher challenges, but I'm already looking forward to it. If it wasn't for Elden Ring releasing this year as well, then Kirby would have certainly taken the spot for my GOTY. It may not be as mind-bending as Galaxy, but all a platformer really needs to be for me is fun, and this game has it in spades.

My sin is not having played this earlier.

My punishment is sitting at my PC for half an hour trying to come up with a review, but the words just don't come to me.

I'm glad I'm not the only one that didn't understand what the hell transpired in this game. It doesn't matter, though; enemies go boom.

A game I decided to start playing alongside New Super Mario Bros. What I didn't expect is finishing this one first. While I was more invested, that's not to say that I think this game is better, per se, but sometimes you just need to change up your routine a bit.

In a franchise with such a repetitive premise that has been going strong for nearly 40 years, it's easy to experience burnout or outright boredom at times, even as a fan of platformers. Super Princess Peach isn't exactly a shining example of great level design, but its simple gameplay gimmicks and twist on the classic "save the princess" trope were enough to keep me entertained throughout.

Across the game's 8 worlds, you play as Princess Peach, rescuing Toads hidden inside of pink ! boxes, with the ultimate goal of saving Mario from Bowser. The game's main gimmick is that you can switch between 4 emotions to solve basic puzzles or defeat certain bosses. Just to make it slightly annoying, these emotions are tied to a depletable gauge. Sometimes I found myself running out and having to scavenge the area for enemies to "consume" to refill it. But that said, there's nothing all that deep about this mechanic, and there's a point well before the final boss where you've pretty much seen most, if not all of the gimmicks the game throws at you. But that's ok, because there's something kind of soothing about the game.

Mario games, even if most aren't known for being a huge challenge, still usually require focus to navigate tricky sections of platforming while avoiding enemies. SPP makes away with lives, and its slower pace of gameplay makes for a more relaxed experience. Definitely a pretty easy game overall, but I loved its charm. Boss battles were especially fun, as they actually required some level of strategy when compared to the usual Mario tradition of just jumping on them a few times.

My biggest complaint? Finding every Toad is mandatory if you wanna fight the final boss and beat the game, which for the most part isn't too bad, but some of the later stages can be tedious to navigate as you search for them. No shame in using a guide if you're missing a few.

The original Zelda title may not exactly be remembered as one of the series' finest moments, but it definitely laid the foundation for better things to come. The sense of adventure and exploration, the dungeon crawling, the item collection, and the grand bosses are all here, if only on a smaller scale.

Being immediately hurled into Hyrule, with no tutorial, and a very basic backstory, is a wonder of an age long gone. It perfectly captures the essence of what an adventure should be; an exciting trek into the vast unknown. Upon entering the first cave, you'll be greeted by one of gaming's most iconic lines: "IT'S DANGEROUS TO GO ALONE! TAKE THIS." This only further solidifies that idea.

For an NES game, the immersion is there. Hyrule is a fairly large area given the console's limitations, and the dungeons can be fun to navigate and conquer, for the most part. That said, this is a difficult game for sure, and it's what holds it back from greatness. Finding and navigating certain dungeons can be a real chore in the latter parts, and without a guide, it would amount to a lot of hassle and trial and error.

Established fans of the series should not jump into this game expecting a similar ordeal to other 2D titles, as doing so may leave you underwhelmed with its relative simplicity; and possibly even irritated with its difficulty. For anyone willing to look past its archaic design; or anyone simply looking for an old school challenge, I recommend it.

Reasons Why Xenoblade Chronicles 2 Sucks:

- A slow start that takes way too long to pick up
- An overabundance of tutorials that don't even do a good job of explaining the game's mechanics
- Navigation is often confusing due to lack of proper elevation markers
- Gacha mechanics in a $60 single player game???
- Menus are too clunky and slow for the amount of Blade management and customization that you'll be doing
- Story progression is sometimes tied to an annoying skill upgrade system
- Rex won't shut up about the power of friendship
- Tora is a creep-ass pervert who is a poor replacement for the superior Heropon Riki
- Zeke didn't get enough screen time
- Melia is not in the game
- Pyra's chest is too big

Reasons Why Xenoblade Chronicles 2 Doesn't Actually Suck:

- Combat is a major upgrade from the first Xenoblade game (once it clicks, at least)
- Side quests have been greatly improved as well
- The world is expansive and beautiful (Switch limitations aside)
- The music, bro...
- I cried
- Stockholm syndrome, I guess
- I would die for almost anyone in the main cast
- Definitely Stockholm syndrome

I first played this game when I was 13 but didn't finish it until a few months later when I was 14. What can I say? I'm easily distracted. I'm now 23, and Sonic Frontiers just released. It got me in the mood to go back and revisit some of the Blue Blur's classics, a lot of which I haven't played. Now, I had a soft spot for Sonic as a kid -- I mean, I can't even tell you how many hours I spent on Sonic Heroes. That said, over the years, a lot of the other games in the franchise I have tried have left a bit of a sour taste in my mouth, but I've been coming around recently! However, Sonic CD is a game that I always thought back fondly on. I liked it enough back then to go for all the Steam achievements, even, which usually I can't be bothered with for platformers. As time passed, I wondered if maybe younger me was just overhyping it...

So here I am 10 years later, having decided to re-evaluate it. I was planning on only trying it for a few minutes before bed, but I ended up completing a whole playthrough in one sitting. I mean, not that it's a long game, but I was very sleep deprived, and I knew better than to postpone some much-needed rest before an early morning shift. But I couldn't help myself! It seems younger me was definitely not overhyping it. The replay value on this one is insane. Every level is a joy to navigate (minus that stupid pinball one), and their abstract design + the techno-infused soundtrack makes for an extremely memorable game. It's too bad it was relegated to obscurity in its time due to being on stupid hardware that no one owned.

P.S. Did you know that CD stands for Chili Dog?

Bioshock is often brought up as an example of excellent world-building and storytelling. Its beautifully eerie atmosphere hooked me in from the start. The first time you come across a Big Daddy is both frightening and surreal. I for one, was expecting many more tense encounters like this throughout the game. However, I quickly realized something. This was a shooter first, and a horror game second; but not in an overtly scary, diabolical sort of way. The horror here is subtle, mainly drawing on the story's dark themes and its gloomy ambience.

After a couple of hours exploring, its initial sense of dread started to dissipate for me, as new abilities and weapons started to become available. No longer did I feel as vulnerable, and the game became more of a standard shooter but with the inclusion of some really cool superhuman abilities (called plasmids). At first, these abilities felt more like "all flash and no substance," but after experimenting a bit, I realized it can be quite fun to take down enemies by mixing up your arsenal of weapons and plasmids. Though, I would be lying if I said switching between guns and plasmids was intuitive. Using KB+M, I found myself having constant brain farts trying to string good combinations. But when I manage to pull them off, it's pretty neat. To be fair, the gameplay itself isn't what kept me playing. It all goes back to how the game keeps up its sense of mystery.

The way most of the story is presented is pretty non-linear. There are collectible tapes you can find scattered around the environment, and there are plenty of these that help keep you up to date with the lore and provide a better understanding of character motivations and plot details. Only thing I didn't really like about this is that I would often find these in the middle of action, and it's very hard to focus on them while you're trying not to get killed. It's a bit chaotic is all.

The game has its fair share of annoying fetch quests and such, but there aren't too many of these, and they did provide an excuse to better explore new areas. I think the worst thing about the gameplay are the hacking minigames, which for me at least, sort of broke the immersion, and you have to do plenty of these if you want to find goodies or freely move around without fear of accidentally triggering an alarm. These complaints, while minor, did make certain sections a bit of a slog, and I can assure you that without a great story backing this game up, I would have found the whole experience mediocre at best.

That said, I really enjoyed unveiling the mysteries that Rapture had to offer and exploring its haunting domain. I completely understand the love people have for it. Personally, I could have done with a bit more polish in certain areas; particularly the combat. As a general tip, I highly recommend rescuing all the little sisters to get the good ending. It provides one of the most heartwarming endings I've ever witnessed in a videogame and made the effort feel worthwhile.

I hope whoever designed Wing Fortress Zone has had a horrible life. Between this and some of the other bullshit in the final third of the game, like the terrible enemy placement in Metropolis and being forced to beat the final 2 bosses without any rings, I ended up feeling a bit conflicted on what to rate this one. Overall, this is definitely a huge improvement over the first game. Gone is the slow and tedious platforming that was often required. This is the beginning of the faster-paced gameplay we have grown accustomed to with the 2D series. Also, there's a spin-dash now!

There are also more zones here, most of which are pretty darn good, but despite what many people say about this being peak Sonic, I can't help but feel it's just a tad overrated. My heart may already belong to CD's level design, but I was hoping I'd be blown away with this one, and the final few acts didn't help. But you know what? The soundtrack kicks so much ass that I'm willing to partially forgive it. Very rarely does a game's soundtrack greatly enhance the experience for me, but this one did, and it's not even a JRPG! Color me surprised.

P.S. I heard the special stages are worse here than in the first game... Well, I can't comment on that because I didn't find a single special stage on my first playthrough. Not like I ever really cared about them anyway.

It is now January 21st, 2021. I have just defeated the final boss of this game. I am numb. I have no desire to do much of anything at the moment. David Bowie is sweetly serenading me with his sultry voice as I type this out. Because as much as I don't want to put any effort into typing out a review right now, I feel obligated to before I forget. This game has destroyed me. The mental strain and frustration I felt throughout most of it is something that I hope I don't have to experience ever again. That said, why the 3/10 then? Surely, this game deserves the lowest rating possible for breaking me, right? Well, not necessarily. There's a lot to dislike here for sure, but I can't bring myself to completely hate it.

I'm not going to get into plot details here (because to be quite honest, the game lost me around Chapter 5 out of 7). I can say, however that if you are a fan of zany and some light dark humor, you might still find the dialogue and story to be silly enough to keep your attention. I was all for it at first. I liked the 'Tim Burton-esque' art design and the characters are mostly cute and likeable, with the Shadow King (shown on the cover) being a great source of comedic relief. Quick laughs and nice art direction can only get you so far, though. Almost everything else about this game fails to deliver to a certain degree.

I feel like this review would be far too long if I decide to thoroughly explain everything I found wrong with this title. Instead, I'll list some of its glaring issues:

- Boring and repetitive dungeon design
- Simplistic battle system that gets redundant real quick
- Optional overworld encounters are not so optional... (more on that later)
- Unintuative party switch system (where you have to backtrack to an inn just to switch out party members)
- Limited areas to explore which leads to...
- Excessive backtracking with an annoying quick travel system
- Ridiculous difficulty curve during later boss fights (Unless you grind a ton and/or stockpile a lot of consumables, you are at the mercy of the terrible RNG)

That last point is honestly the biggest source of my frustration with this game. Up until the 4th boss, I think, the game had been relatively easy. As long as I just fought whatever enemies I came across, it seems I was ready for anything. But then the game decided it wasn't gonna be a scrawny little 'kids' RPG anymore and became Dark Souls (please excuse the overused comparison). But yeah, it seemed that suddenly your whole adventure became a game of chance, where winning boss fights relied on obtuse tactics or sluggish grinding and item stockpiling. What little sense of enjoyment I had was gone after that. Basically, what I'm saying is that the game was enjoyable up until it wasn't...

I was actually gonna go into detail about one boss in particular... but I don't wanna spoil it. All I can say is, you'll know when you get there if you decide to play this. Good luck. I say that assuming you were playing this game casually and not grinding from the start, of course. But anyway, I finally got to Chapter 7 earlier. The final chapter. I was almost done. I felt relieved... but that didn't last. The final dungeon is one of the most complicated and annoying examples of poor level design I have ever seen. It's not fun. It requires traversing a drab maze of bookshelves and tight corridors where everything looks the same, which makes it hard to navigate. You're expected to navigate this God-forsaken place while struggling with the aggressive enemy AI. I mentioned earlier that I was gonna talk about those pesky encounters. They are especially bad here. Basically, the way that encounters work in this game is that enemies first appear as these clouds with eyes on the overworld... but they appear randomly and at close proximity. The longer you avoid them, the more aggressive they get. You'll eventually get touched by one because you have no time to react and move out of the way, and in the case of the final 'dungeon,' you often have nowhere to go because you're trapped by the narrow corridors.

By the time I finished the game, my in-game playtime was around 21 hours or so, but that doesn't account for the amount of times I had to restart battles (at one point just to get a stupid rare drop for a Playstation trophy). It would have also been less if I didn't have so much downtime trying to figure out what to do at certain points. Talking to people, walking around in circles, backtracking, blah blah. It's a shame that I had such a bad time, because again, the aesthetics and presentation were interesting in certain areas, and I can't deny that bosses could still be exhilarating whenever I was properly prepared. But the game has too many issues that make it a very incompetent RPG. To all of its fans, I salute thee. You guys are warriors and it makes me wonder if maybe this is all just a skill issue.

P.S. Ending was pretty cute, though.

For anyone wanting to get into the older Dragon Quest titles, IV seems like the best starting point, personally. Think about this: You have an RPG that originally came out in 1990 for the NES, with an actual attempt at character development. Not only that, but they took it a step further by dividing it up into chapters. The first four specifically focus on certain characters, giving you a nice introduction to each one and their basic jobs in a party setting. As an introduction to the series, this works really well, as the chapter system allows for a big window of time to familiarize yourself with the world exploration and battle mechanics in a relatively linear fashion. Many RPGs from this era can be intimidating due to the lack of direction, but DQ IV makes it feel accessible and welcoming. For reference, there are five main chapters in this remake (with an optional post-game chapter), and it took me around 10 hours to finish the first 4. The fifth chapter is where everyone finally comes together and the real journey begins. By that point, you've spent a good chunk of time with the game and opening up the world is no
longer so intimidating.

Granted, while dividing up the game like this is a very innovative storytelling technique for the time, some may be curious if drags out for too long. I will admit, some character's chapters are certainly more interesting than others. Chapter 3 in particular is pretty slow as you take control of a merchant character who goes about his day selling weapons at a shop to make some money. You'll be doing this for a while at the start of it just to afford proper gear to go out and fight some baddies. While certain sections like this can be rather sluggish, they often don't drag on for too long, and they provide some really cool immersion into these characters' lives. By the time you reach Chapter 5, I feel that you will be invested enough in these characters (provided you are enjoying the game), to make the final chapter all the more interesting.

I spent enough time trying to sell you on the game's main storytelling gimmick, but how does the game itself play? If you've never played a Dragon Quest game, it's pretty standard classic JRPG fare. You talk to people and receive valuable hints, traverse dungeons, fight bosses, the works. DQ IV's bright and colorful world keeps things fun. No dungeons ever truly feel tedious, and while grinding is certainly necessary at points, it's nothing too bad. The great thing about this series in general is how valuable level ups can be. Leveling up even once can make all the difference when confronted with a difficult area/boss. And with the ability to swap out characters even during battle once you have your full team with you in the latter half of the game, the game feels quite forgiving for the most part. With this remake, you get some great quality of life improvements too, such as quick saving in most places, even within dungeons. Besides this, you also get full party control in the final two chapters (this includes the post-game chapter). In the original game, you could only control the hero while the rest of your party was AI-controlled. The option is still there for anyone that wants to go the traditional route, though.

Overall, while I think some of the chapters could have benefitted from being a bit more fleshed out or cutting some minor fluff, it still does a great job on worldbuilding and keeping things fresh with some variety in its gameplay and character POV. The world is vibrant and charming, boss fights are a joy to conquer, and the story and characters have enough depth for a 30+ year old game to be worth the time. Also, this game seriously has one of the coolest final boss fights I've ever encountered in any JRPG. I recommend the mobile version due to it including the party chat feature, which serves to slightly flesh out character personalities more through fun side banter. It's not necessary to enjoy the game, but the option is there. Whichever version you play, you're still in for a great classic DQ experience, just with the added modern QOL improvements.

Fear not, for I have seen beyond the dreaded Marble Zone at long last and it's... alright. There's a certain charm that comes with the original game. Not having a spin-dash feels really strange and cumbersome, and for a game that was advertised on the notion of having to go fast, you honestly rarely get a chance to, especially with the amount of tight platforming you have to do in the later zones (and frankly, Marble Zone is a patience tester that is almost inexcusable).

In the year 2022 of our Lord, I cannot say that this game holds up very well, especially when I have been spoiled by modern Sonic mechanics. Though, if you think of this less as a game focused on speed but rather as a traditional platformer with "speed-focused" physics, you might come to appreciate it better. I'm just glad they had the decency to at least include a level select cheat code, because having to repeat zones again and again would be a miserable experience. Heck, continues are tough to come by unless you're good enough to consistently get high scores in acts or unlock the bonus stages and do well enough in them. But if so, would you even really need the surplus of continues in the first place?