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Run ‘n Gun-a-thon — Part 2
Contra III starts off with a bang. As soon as the music starts, your instinct is to move right and blast everything in sight. Within 60 seconds, you’re jumping into a tank and annihilating fortification posts. Then a combat plane swoops in and sets the entire street ablaze, forcing you to grab steel beams to navigate the conflagration. After that, a gargantuan alien turtle bursts through a wall, eager to murder our ripped heroes.
All of this happens within the first level, making you think the rest of the game will be similarly energetic and fun. You are greeted with the map of level 2 and realize it’s a top-down level. Okay, no big deal. The top-down levels from Super C and Operation C were tolerable. Then you start playing it and realize you have to control the camera to aim because some nutjob at Konami thought making your head spin during a shooter was a brilliant idea. I rarely get motion-sick, and yet I found these levels to be borderline nauseating. My heart goes out to those who played this on original hardware and needed to vomit after playing. I found out in level 5 that you can hold L to lock your aim in place to counter the quicksand that spins you around. This is nice, but good luck beating the boss without dying.
The other levels are hit-or-miss. Level 3 has some cool setpieces and was just as fun to play as 1. 4 on the other hand is very dull until you’re hopping between missiles in the sky. 6 was also underwhelming with how similar it was to the original game’s alien lair.
So much of the experience is style over substance. In that sense, it has some parallels with Super Castlevania IV. Both titles were technical showcases for the SNES, but I had much more fun hanging out with Simon Belmont. Its atmosphere has yet to be equaled by any 2D platformer and it retained a healthy degree of challenge despite some mechanical tweaks that favored the player. The only reason I would replay Contra III is the first and third levels.
Contra III starts off with a bang. As soon as the music starts, your instinct is to move right and blast everything in sight. Within 60 seconds, you’re jumping into a tank and annihilating fortification posts. Then a combat plane swoops in and sets the entire street ablaze, forcing you to grab steel beams to navigate the conflagration. After that, a gargantuan alien turtle bursts through a wall, eager to murder our ripped heroes.
All of this happens within the first level, making you think the rest of the game will be similarly energetic and fun. You are greeted with the map of level 2 and realize it’s a top-down level. Okay, no big deal. The top-down levels from Super C and Operation C were tolerable. Then you start playing it and realize you have to control the camera to aim because some nutjob at Konami thought making your head spin during a shooter was a brilliant idea. I rarely get motion-sick, and yet I found these levels to be borderline nauseating. My heart goes out to those who played this on original hardware and needed to vomit after playing. I found out in level 5 that you can hold L to lock your aim in place to counter the quicksand that spins you around. This is nice, but good luck beating the boss without dying.
The other levels are hit-or-miss. Level 3 has some cool setpieces and was just as fun to play as 1. 4 on the other hand is very dull until you’re hopping between missiles in the sky. 6 was also underwhelming with how similar it was to the original game’s alien lair.
So much of the experience is style over substance. In that sense, it has some parallels with Super Castlevania IV. Both titles were technical showcases for the SNES, but I had much more fun hanging out with Simon Belmont. Its atmosphere has yet to be equaled by any 2D platformer and it retained a healthy degree of challenge despite some mechanical tweaks that favored the player. The only reason I would replay Contra III is the first and third levels.
I love this dev. They come up with such smart and high concept ideas, and though this didnt hit in the way 7 Days did for me, I still enjoyed the time I spent with it. Normally, personality tests as a concept are something I don't particularly subscribe to (especially as a gameplay format), but in the case of Refind Self it works incredibly well. Playing as an android, simultaneously teaching her humanity while also exercising your own freedom of choice is a very endearing route of storytelling. The grief and kindness expressed through the options you chose, the limited amount of time you have to play reflecting the wind-up android's existence... as seems to always be the case, this dev is very careful and smart in the way they go about presenting their world. I love their artstyle, love the philosophy behind it. The only thing I could say these games lack is music, as each only has a few tracks (few meaning 2 or 3) that don't loop especially well. Highly suggest this dev's catalog for anyone looking for a unique and short, lovingly crafted experience. Really excited to see what they put out next ☆
I was almost tricked into thinking this was a proper, intentionally designed video game. Then I hit mission five, where that facade was torn apart by a pack of angry bears.
The stealth mechanics aren't too shabby, even when presented alongside what's essentially an official pack of custom levels. It's still satisfying to learn the layouts of these small levels and use your stealth skills to complete them efficiently. Just...watch out for the bears.
The stealth mechanics aren't too shabby, even when presented alongside what's essentially an official pack of custom levels. It's still satisfying to learn the layouts of these small levels and use your stealth skills to complete them efficiently. Just...watch out for the bears.
Super Metroid
1994
outside of the (understandably) on-the-nose coloured doorways nearly every instance of environmental interaction is rich and tactile. thirty years later it's still a wonder to grope and paw at every (Possibly Maybe) malleable surface and leverage every new upgrade toward greater structural manipulation and command
in ensuring how and when are given as much significance as what and where it forms a relationship between actor and environment that bears uncommonly personal patterns and markings as you learn to use Your body as an implement to interface with the world. sidepaths and back alleys that carve Under - Over - Through reshape the familiar thru layered mechanical discovery and shift the internal v external dynamic in turn; mastery of the self begetting exponential mastery of the other
a fitting problem then that the biocircuitry, plunging intestinal mazes, and gloomy dark ambient synthesis quickly become less something to endure so much as to dominate; the dissonance for show, and the brutality nakedly glamorous and one sided. so much of it exists in service to the pursuit of (Your) power, kneeling with its neck outstretched waiting to feel bones shatter for Your gratification. sure, I feel obscenely powerful, but I'd rather feel anything else
strange scene it is
every thing in flames
in ensuring how and when are given as much significance as what and where it forms a relationship between actor and environment that bears uncommonly personal patterns and markings as you learn to use Your body as an implement to interface with the world. sidepaths and back alleys that carve Under - Over - Through reshape the familiar thru layered mechanical discovery and shift the internal v external dynamic in turn; mastery of the self begetting exponential mastery of the other
a fitting problem then that the biocircuitry, plunging intestinal mazes, and gloomy dark ambient synthesis quickly become less something to endure so much as to dominate; the dissonance for show, and the brutality nakedly glamorous and one sided. so much of it exists in service to the pursuit of (Your) power, kneeling with its neck outstretched waiting to feel bones shatter for Your gratification. sure, I feel obscenely powerful, but I'd rather feel anything else
strange scene it is
every thing in flames
Why the hell was I playing this when I was a kid? How the hell did I get so far? The mind control component was so satisfying and compelling, and really this is an incredibly bizarre game that I feel like had to be the result of some unique and fleeting circumstances.
Ys IX: Monstrum Nox
2019
There's a story beat in Ys IX: Monstrum Nox where the large Pendleton company, the major employer within the city, has systematically disenfranchised the people of shantytown situated alongside the literal sewers. There's a chivalrous Robin Hood-esque figure who steals from the Pendleton company and gives to the poor residents, and the game's message is to admonish this figure for doing so by showing multiple scenes of the poor people being lazy and indolent and wasting the assistance on booze. The ending to this particular subplot is so blatant as to be insulting - the solution is to start your own business and show the rest of peasantry that you can climb out of the sewers with hard work (and perhaps some generous private subsidies). This is the product of Japanese sociocultural attitudes toward capitalism, much like its partners in the West. Poverty is treated as an individualist issue, one inextricably tied to moral fundamentalism. You're poor because you have bad habits. I'm rich because I work hard. It's worse than garbage writing, its some of the most irresponsible neoliberal wankery I have ever had the misfortune of experiencing. Game sucks.
Maybe I'm just relieved to have a better game after the disappointment of Sonic 2 Game Gear, but I liked this game decently enough.
This is one of the most shallow Sonic games out there, honestly, there's not much to set it apart from the rest. Letting you choose between Sonic and Tails is neat, as Tails has the ability to fly, but I think only Sonic can get the Chaos Emeralds (and thus the true ending), and Tails doesn't get the rocket shoes (which is pretty much the only other defining thing about this game, and even then I think they come back in Triple Trouble?).
They must have heard the decries of Sonic 2 Game Gear's difficulty, because while that game was way more difficult than it had any right to be, this one is perhaps the easiest Sonic game ever? The only difficulty here is, if you want the Emeralds, collecting 100 rings in a level as it can't be done in every level, and the last two bosses can be tough if you don't grab any rings; they actually give rings for the bosses this time, but only in one item box and you gotta find it first, and it can be a little difficult to regrab the ring if you get hit.
Anyway, I wouldn't really say this is the most worth it game to play, but you're also not wasting much time if you do. If you don't care about the true ending, you can beat each level in less than a minute fairly easily. You could already have been through half the game if you didn't read this review, what are you doing?
sonic 1 game gear remains on top
Edit: I just read the description of this game that's on this page and omg... I know a lot of games would have the story tucked away in the manual back in the day, but geez. You're in an alternate universe? South Island is sinking? You glean none of that from the game itself lol.
This is one of the most shallow Sonic games out there, honestly, there's not much to set it apart from the rest. Letting you choose between Sonic and Tails is neat, as Tails has the ability to fly, but I think only Sonic can get the Chaos Emeralds (and thus the true ending), and Tails doesn't get the rocket shoes (which is pretty much the only other defining thing about this game, and even then I think they come back in Triple Trouble?).
They must have heard the decries of Sonic 2 Game Gear's difficulty, because while that game was way more difficult than it had any right to be, this one is perhaps the easiest Sonic game ever? The only difficulty here is, if you want the Emeralds, collecting 100 rings in a level as it can't be done in every level, and the last two bosses can be tough if you don't grab any rings; they actually give rings for the bosses this time, but only in one item box and you gotta find it first, and it can be a little difficult to regrab the ring if you get hit.
Anyway, I wouldn't really say this is the most worth it game to play, but you're also not wasting much time if you do. If you don't care about the true ending, you can beat each level in less than a minute fairly easily. You could already have been through half the game if you didn't read this review, what are you doing?
sonic 1 game gear remains on top
Edit: I just read the description of this game that's on this page and omg... I know a lot of games would have the story tucked away in the manual back in the day, but geez. You're in an alternate universe? South Island is sinking? You glean none of that from the game itself lol.
Super Mario 64 3DS
2021
I only recently learned that this even exists, just by scrolling through a particular shop of no importance. I figured, why not, I'll give it a fun try, and in the only way I know how anymore. With a 16 Star speedrun.
... That run took me, like, two weeks, because I immediately learned upon booting the game up that my New Nintendo 2DS XL™©'s analog stick has drift. Something I'd never noticed, but I suppose the stick is extra sensitive when it comes to Mario 64.
As far as I can tell, it's just Super Mario 64 on 3DS. A marvel to be sure, and a fun game all around, if you're looking for a fun new way to play, there's no reason not to try it out. Assuming your system doesn't also have drift. That can get very annoying, no matter how short you're playtime might be.
also would not recommend BLJs on a 3DS, not very fun.
... That run took me, like, two weeks, because I immediately learned upon booting the game up that my New Nintendo 2DS XL™©'s analog stick has drift. Something I'd never noticed, but I suppose the stick is extra sensitive when it comes to Mario 64.
As far as I can tell, it's just Super Mario 64 on 3DS. A marvel to be sure, and a fun game all around, if you're looking for a fun new way to play, there's no reason not to try it out. Assuming your system doesn't also have drift. That can get very annoying, no matter how short you're playtime might be.
also would not recommend BLJs on a 3DS, not very fun.
Hide and Shoot
2020
Hasn't been updated since 2020, the year of its release. Obviously unplayable as the only actual content is online matchmaking.
The art reminds me of those early Japanese indies you could find floating around Freett and Geocities, that's the only interesting part about it.
The art reminds me of those early Japanese indies you could find floating around Freett and Geocities, that's the only interesting part about it.
Sonic the Hedgehog 2
1992
Always thought I would like this game more than most people, but I guess I ended up liking it less than most. Perhaps if you play it repeatedly it's better, but in this one playthough... oof. The bosses for this game are notorious for not giving you any rings, and the very first one just absolutely sucks right off the bat. Weirdly, the first boss is perhaps the hardest of the game. I had a lot of blunders on the other ones, but I think I was just too in my head, they're really rather easy for the most part. But yeah, the bosses are mainly what hold this game back for me, or at least the level leading up to them, because this has the Sonic 1 Genesis approach of having a level before the boss. It's not bad for most of them, but holy hell the Green Hills Zone act 3 level is ass.
The regular levels are also a mixed bag. I rather liked Green Hills and Aqua Lake Zone, but Gimmick Mt. and Scrambled Egg Zone were kinda bad (Scrambled Egg especially is doo doo). The other levels are negligible. Kudos for trying different themes than the typical ones, and placing the Green Hill clone in the middle of the game.
I'd personally just rather play Sonic 1 on Game Gear, though, I don't see this as an improvement at all, but rather frustrating most of the time.
The regular levels are also a mixed bag. I rather liked Green Hills and Aqua Lake Zone, but Gimmick Mt. and Scrambled Egg Zone were kinda bad (Scrambled Egg especially is doo doo). The other levels are negligible. Kudos for trying different themes than the typical ones, and placing the Green Hill clone in the middle of the game.
I'd personally just rather play Sonic 1 on Game Gear, though, I don't see this as an improvement at all, but rather frustrating most of the time.