yknow on a strict gaming sense i kinda get why everyone would be angry about this game i didnt actually play the original so i cant fully participate in the general hate about this so yeah i do understand the backlash this game got the majority of the game is cut and the remaining parts do get kind of samey after a while even though the game is fucking SHORT like this is incredibly short people i think i finished it in like 4 - 5 hours is that even possible istg this game is incredibly short

i do believe this feels kind of rushed even for me that i have no idea how the OG game was but it is actually a legit great game yknow did you see the beginning of this game it felt like the silent evil 4 segment UNTIL Jill gets in the bathroom and everything turns 3rd person and THATS absolutely fucking unbelievable maybe this is because i have no experience with the material this is based off so im probably just going omg fancy graphics and cool mechanics and omg zombies this is sick and shit like that

now this plays out as a classic resident evil and its pretty similar to resident evil 2 from the gameplay experience to the way everything looks and the character models and you can basically tell that capcom saw how well the re2 remake sold and said ok lets just rush another one and get that fucking money that we so need for the re4 remake

and they did it

lets just talk about the elephant in the room and unmistakably the greatest aspect of this entire game: carlos

people in this room i invite you to just get a drink and sit back because this is gonna be long so apart from the main character jill valentine who you would also know for her protagonist role in the VERY FIRST resident evil game alongside hot and sexy young chris redfield and shit like that you can definitely understand how she is not targeted to me because her partner exists so you are introduced to the second main character carlos oliveira who is as for my humble opinion possibly the hottest character in the entire resident evil franchise and thats incredibly flattering considering that chris redfield is just sitting there waiting to be sucked dry so if you had told me in 1999 that carlos was hot i wouldve laughed at your face because lets be real OG carlos is kinda ugly and im not gonna lie about this i am not a liar he looked weird he looked out of place and he looked like he did not get pussy for 2 decades but guys . guys remake carlos is something else i was not ready to see this man in action AT ALL i will be real with you i was not unaware of his existence due to rule34 and other stuff like twitter porn section and all that shit so i knew very well who carlos oliveira was and the chokehold he had on me so i was PREPARED but not as much as i shouldve because seeing him get all hot and sweaty shooting zombies in the face . i am in love guys like look at his curly hair his cute smile his charisma his humour his big and strong and beefy arms did you see those arms oh my god im dizzy when he said I know. You want to ask me out. All the foxy ladies love my accent. It drives them crazy. i was IN LOVE i swooned i blushed i was not joking this man has too much power on me and i dont like it he could ruin my life and my hole and i wouldnt say a thing im so sorry mom

umh so umh sorry about that so as i was saying the story revolves around these 2 people they get into the racoon city zombie havoc and stuff and they gotta escape thats the main gist of it all and it is interesting to traverse racoon city it has some interesting locations here and there and you can see people going absolutely crazy over it and honestly wouldnt you too if zombies were going around killing people and a big humanoid monster chased you around i dont think you would have so much fun if i can have an opinion about this so

ok whatever resident evil plot always gets infodumped in the end and its always the same shit oh no there was a biohazard around a biological weapon from a pharmacological company that was used because of MONEY and suddenly it spread and everyones a zombie now and thats fucking it experiments on people virus infecting everyone trying to create the ultimate humanoid bio weapon or some shit like that its always a plot like this and never carlos fucks me in the ass pornhub gay

so apart from the usual storyline the game itself is incredibly gorgeous every scene is great theres no scenery that wasnt absolutely breathtaking even though its literally a town in ruin but what do we care when RTX is on

people complained about the fact that nemesis encounters are scripted and dont last long and again since i havent played the original i cant agree to this criticism BUT i did enjoy the different boss battles and the fact that slowly and steadily nemesis evolved into a more disgusting and heinous being by the end of the game so yeah and the final fucking boss fight with the huge gun fight is too fun to be real

umh i mean not too much more to say about this game apart from the fact that those bug like zombies who deepthroated jill were the grossest thing ive ever experienced since heather vomiting the fetus so i can say for sure that this was done for fetish art i cannot overstate i fetish ey this looks oh my fucking god that segment doesnt feel real it was literally deepthroat green herb vomit deepthroat green herb vomit who thought about that honestly i need to talk for a sec forreal

GG i dont remember any ost rn but i do remember some banger songs so i will just trust my memories all in all a great experience i would rate it carlos/10 thank you everybody

Reviewed on Jun 06, 2023


Comments