You take the role of a freelance pilot who has to save the Universe from evil warlord Xoxx, who has stolen a gigantic space gun with the power to destroy the entire Universe. Buckle up because it's going to be a blast!
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Before I fell in love with Fire Emblem, my favorite type of game was scrolling shooter games, playing dumb stuff like Chicken Invaders. When I got around to playing this game however, I remember both enjoying it and being terrified of it at the same time. Its OST is overrated and literally spooked the ever-living heck out of me to the point my dumb 8-year-old brain would prompt a crying command whenever my ship’s hull integrity hit 0, on the “Too Fat to Die” difficulty, which is supposedly the easiest one. I vowed to conquer this game one day, and when I got my Switch a year ago, I finally did that. Don’t know why someone decided to port an outdated 2004 game over to the Switch, but I finally played through it and didn’t like it as much as I thought I would. First of all, unlike Turtle Odyssey 2, this is clearly NOT for children. Despite avoiding a rating from the ESRB, it’s easily a Teen rating, for mild swearing, sexual references in the 3rd stage, and mild gore that grossed me out as a kid.
Anyway, when I finally beat it, I had plenty of fun overall, but I found some major problems. Despite the fact the developers let you upgrade your weapons, your default ones fall off in the lategame, even if you land every bullet consistently whilst dodging every nil of enemy fire, which is easier said than done. The enemy units have well designed speed, attacks, and especially variety, but the enemy units themselves are extremely durable in all difficulties and require only the best weapons to be taken down swiftly, which defeats the purpose of having so many weapons and bombs. I remember some stages being outright nearly impossible to win with just my combination of weapons (I even upgraded my ship to the maximum level), so I had to experiment with buying new expensive weapons each time I saved per stage, which is a godsend, and I don’t think I would’ve cleared the final stages without having sold my old stuff to play with the spiffy new gear. There’s just no room for variety, since, if you choose to stick with what served you quite well in the earlygame, you have to play perfectly otherwise you lose either due to terrain/enemy collision, too much enemy fire relative to what your hull integrity can handle, or stupid surprises such as unique level conditions. This does mean that no level quite plays the same, but they are usually frustrating more than anything. There’s a level where you have to play Superman 64 but in 2D side scrolling, where if you miss one ring you’ll lose. There’s a level where you have to blow up laser walls being defended by Walkers from Star Wars. Before you ask about the durability of the Walkers, they are insanely tanky and usually stand in front of these stupid one hit KO defensive complexes. I remember using tons of bombs on top of a Walker (which has an auto reticle, so you have to constantly move to dodge its rapid fire, which means you guessed it – I had to tank all of its hits due to the limited space caused by the auto scrolling) defending a stupid laser complex, and by the time it finally died the auto scrolling left me so dangerously close to the weak point of the laser blaster. Yes, it does count as terrain, so your hull integrity will suffer, and I was squished to death because of the weak point and auto scrolling acting in tandem. The second time I tried that stupid level I barely managed to destroy both the Walker and its base in due time, only to be blown up in mere seconds by other stupid surprises, with a save point in front. The THIRD time I finally reached the save point, and then things went smoothly after that. That’s not even mentioning the worst offender – that being to destroy a super tanky boss in a time limit. This was when the ball dropped. When I finally realized that this game was overall badly designed and overrated. It was here where I literally had to land EVERY. SINGLE. BULLET. To kill that thing, and while it felt very cathartic, the fact that it was the hardest level in the entire game made it feel more penultimate than anything. This game hasn’t aged well with time outside of the visual spectacle. Even then, I despise the art direction, mainly the title screen that's probably making you puke right now.
The story is bland, but I think that’s the point. Not much to say about it other than some of the dialogue is very cringe, but at least it made me feel something. I finally conquered this game, and I don't think I'll look back on it as fondly as I used to.
Anyway, when I finally beat it, I had plenty of fun overall, but I found some major problems. Despite the fact the developers let you upgrade your weapons, your default ones fall off in the lategame, even if you land every bullet consistently whilst dodging every nil of enemy fire, which is easier said than done. The enemy units have well designed speed, attacks, and especially variety, but the enemy units themselves are extremely durable in all difficulties and require only the best weapons to be taken down swiftly, which defeats the purpose of having so many weapons and bombs. I remember some stages being outright nearly impossible to win with just my combination of weapons (I even upgraded my ship to the maximum level), so I had to experiment with buying new expensive weapons each time I saved per stage, which is a godsend, and I don’t think I would’ve cleared the final stages without having sold my old stuff to play with the spiffy new gear. There’s just no room for variety, since, if you choose to stick with what served you quite well in the earlygame, you have to play perfectly otherwise you lose either due to terrain/enemy collision, too much enemy fire relative to what your hull integrity can handle, or stupid surprises such as unique level conditions. This does mean that no level quite plays the same, but they are usually frustrating more than anything. There’s a level where you have to play Superman 64 but in 2D side scrolling, where if you miss one ring you’ll lose. There’s a level where you have to blow up laser walls being defended by Walkers from Star Wars. Before you ask about the durability of the Walkers, they are insanely tanky and usually stand in front of these stupid one hit KO defensive complexes. I remember using tons of bombs on top of a Walker (which has an auto reticle, so you have to constantly move to dodge its rapid fire, which means you guessed it – I had to tank all of its hits due to the limited space caused by the auto scrolling) defending a stupid laser complex, and by the time it finally died the auto scrolling left me so dangerously close to the weak point of the laser blaster. Yes, it does count as terrain, so your hull integrity will suffer, and I was squished to death because of the weak point and auto scrolling acting in tandem. The second time I tried that stupid level I barely managed to destroy both the Walker and its base in due time, only to be blown up in mere seconds by other stupid surprises, with a save point in front. The THIRD time I finally reached the save point, and then things went smoothly after that. That’s not even mentioning the worst offender – that being to destroy a super tanky boss in a time limit. This was when the ball dropped. When I finally realized that this game was overall badly designed and overrated. It was here where I literally had to land EVERY. SINGLE. BULLET. To kill that thing, and while it felt very cathartic, the fact that it was the hardest level in the entire game made it feel more penultimate than anything. This game hasn’t aged well with time outside of the visual spectacle. Even then, I despise the art direction, mainly the title screen that's probably making you puke right now.
The story is bland, but I think that’s the point. Not much to say about it other than some of the dialogue is very cringe, but at least it made me feel something. I finally conquered this game, and I don't think I'll look back on it as fondly as I used to.