Shoutout to my boy Fuzzy Bearbarian and his sennin build. Without it I would never manage to bear with this.
So this is a Team Ninja's take on a pretty simple dark souls formula where you beat people with a stick and navigate through poison swamps. Except this one is bloated with unnecessary mechanics to the point of the game being extremely painful to play.
There are somewhat around ten different locations that somehow still manage to look like either a dilapidated village or burning fortress. With exact same enemies everywhere except for mines, where living breathing poison stones reside.
So you are an ordinary Irish pirate chilling in the waves with your ghost waifu Saoirse when suspicious bald man makes you transport some illegal stuff and gets you into prison. He also takes your waifu away and fucks right off to mysterious land of japan. Upon arrival, our boy Geralt becomes master swordsman because he read a book on how to use swords/spears/tonfas/etc unlike those island savages. Such begins a monster-slaying adventure of Garvard of Ireland who for absolutely no reason decides to help one of the sides of civil war. And after a long journey of collecting pokemon and completing same side missions, we finally meet Johnny Sins wannabe, kill giant monster snake and take back our girl and bring peace to the world. End of main story. After some more years we come back to japan because we still dream about including that mysterious moth-girl we saw on a battlefield into our harem. While doing so, Gerbert suppresses another rebellion, manages to defeat nine-tailed fox boss, who takes three quarters of the screen, and meet Maria, who done some bad deeds and just left refusing to elaborate further. But still, with acquired lightness in his soul after fulfilling his harem dreams, Gervant decided to stay in japan to protect the country from evil forevermore. The End.
The game still has some amazing flashy moves and cool designs buried under a toxic pulsating puss of minmaxing everything you have. I don't want to spend hundreds of hours playing inventory and gear management. I want to beat people with a stick and not being told that my gear is shit by exact same enemies from before who were dying to stick-bonking without issues before. The game in its essence boils down to stat check fest. And that makes me want to go hollow.
All of these, of course, do not relate to vanilla game, which can be completed naked and barehanded. But the game itself tells you that it only truly starts with way of the demon. Still, most of level design and enemy placement decisions are shit. And the gear system is garbage. Hope nioh 2 will be less braindead than this.
So this is a Team Ninja's take on a pretty simple dark souls formula where you beat people with a stick and navigate through poison swamps. Except this one is bloated with unnecessary mechanics to the point of the game being extremely painful to play.
There are somewhat around ten different locations that somehow still manage to look like either a dilapidated village or burning fortress. With exact same enemies everywhere except for mines, where living breathing poison stones reside.
So you are an ordinary Irish pirate chilling in the waves with your ghost waifu Saoirse when suspicious bald man makes you transport some illegal stuff and gets you into prison. He also takes your waifu away and fucks right off to mysterious land of japan. Upon arrival, our boy Geralt becomes master swordsman because he read a book on how to use swords/spears/tonfas/etc unlike those island savages. Such begins a monster-slaying adventure of Garvard of Ireland who for absolutely no reason decides to help one of the sides of civil war. And after a long journey of collecting pokemon and completing same side missions, we finally meet Johnny Sins wannabe, kill giant monster snake and take back our girl and bring peace to the world. End of main story. After some more years we come back to japan because we still dream about including that mysterious moth-girl we saw on a battlefield into our harem. While doing so, Gerbert suppresses another rebellion, manages to defeat nine-tailed fox boss, who takes three quarters of the screen, and meet Maria, who done some bad deeds and just left refusing to elaborate further. But still, with acquired lightness in his soul after fulfilling his harem dreams, Gervant decided to stay in japan to protect the country from evil forevermore. The End.
The game still has some amazing flashy moves and cool designs buried under a toxic pulsating puss of minmaxing everything you have. I don't want to spend hundreds of hours playing inventory and gear management. I want to beat people with a stick and not being told that my gear is shit by exact same enemies from before who were dying to stick-bonking without issues before. The game in its essence boils down to stat check fest. And that makes me want to go hollow.
All of these, of course, do not relate to vanilla game, which can be completed naked and barehanded. But the game itself tells you that it only truly starts with way of the demon. Still, most of level design and enemy placement decisions are shit. And the gear system is garbage. Hope nioh 2 will be less braindead than this.