I hate to be that guy. You know, the "Holy freaking crap what a nostalgia bomb, this [Product] is literally my childhood" guy. That guy is the arbiter of the pop culture death spiral we have all spent the last decade-plus suffering through. But the ugly truth of the matter is we are all that guy. Nostalgia is visceral. No matter how much we try to deny it, sometimes it overpowers our weak human analytical centres. I'll whine all day about people uncritically watching a new Disney+ Star Wars mini-series prestige sloptacular but you show me one 3-second animation of 16-bit Donatello playing on his game boy and I'll hand over my entire savings account (though you gotta know, terrible interest rate). You're just going to have to give me this one.
So yes, I grew up obsessed with the ninja turtles. But that's actually kind of weird. The show I watched endlessly ended in the 90s. At that point, I was nary a twinkle in Kevin Rudd's eye. There is a simple answer, I'm from Western Australia. I'm not familiar with the bit, who told it or when, but there's an old stand-up routine one of my uni lecturers loves to reference regarding WA. Something to the tune of 'scientists insist time travel is impossible until they visit Western Australia. As soon as you touch down it's suddenly 1983.' In my experience, this is pretty accurate. Pop culture moves slowly over here and has a hard time reaching us. What sticks, sticks for longer. So I, a 6-year-old boy in 2009, had 2 or 3 seasons of an 80s show (alongside my Disney DTV sequel collection, Lion King 1 1/2 was my favourite) on DVD that I watched obsessively. I still haven't seen 100% of cartoons released after I was born that didn't air on free-to-air TV. At least we got Regular Show and Adventure Time. Mum wouldn't let me watch The Simpsons though. She thought it was too low-brow.
Donnie was my favourite, for the record. Honestly a very effective psychological profiling system. You can glean a lot about me from that. For example, I'd rather have a large stick than a sword, should I be placed in a scenario wherein I'm expected to engage in mortal combat. Also, I prefer the colour purple. Never thought I'd get so personal on this site.
Part of what allows this to stand as an actual achievement in this form, rather than an exclusively cynical exercise in brand synergy, is the astonishing talent behind it. You got the Streets of Rage 4 people on deck. You got the Scott Pilgrim people on deck. There was no way this would be anything less than a gorgeous, stylised throwback with rock-solid fundamentals. Perhaps it's a bit disappointing that it never exceeds these expectations, but it unquestionably matches them.
The actual bummer is how mechanically shallow it is. I hadn't played SOR4 the last time I took revenge on Shredder, and the contrast is pretty hard to ignore. There's not much to the actual combat once you get over the glorious sounds of the punching and hitting. It takes a long time to do so, there are so damn many bells and whistles to distract you from it (goddamn the boss fights here are good) but eventually, you will clue into how little depth your character has.
But I don't care. Remember? I'm indulging myself here. As a fan of [Product], they get it! The personality is all here. Of course they get a power meter recharge when they taunt. Of course Mikey's taunt is the chicken dance. Of course he says 'mongo combo dude' every time you get a big combo. Of course they announce the title of each episode the way they do. Of course the 'Shredder's Revenge' part of the title is said by a guy doing the exact right EVIL voice on the title screen. Of course resurrecting your teammates involves an animation of coaxing them with slices of pizza. Of course THAT is the final boss fight. It's perfect!
I'm sick right now (decidedly not in a fun way) and have to do a lot of work for university in a very short period. I needed some comfort food before I drugged myself with nighttime cold & flu tablets and collapsed unconscious. I sat down to play this just for a little respite, my roommate was on the couch, I handed him the second controller and gestured in the direction of the glorious sounds emanating from Tee Lopes' perfect soundtrack and we beat the whole thing in one sitting. Videogames are a beautiful thing.
So yes, I grew up obsessed with the ninja turtles. But that's actually kind of weird. The show I watched endlessly ended in the 90s. At that point, I was nary a twinkle in Kevin Rudd's eye. There is a simple answer, I'm from Western Australia. I'm not familiar with the bit, who told it or when, but there's an old stand-up routine one of my uni lecturers loves to reference regarding WA. Something to the tune of 'scientists insist time travel is impossible until they visit Western Australia. As soon as you touch down it's suddenly 1983.' In my experience, this is pretty accurate. Pop culture moves slowly over here and has a hard time reaching us. What sticks, sticks for longer. So I, a 6-year-old boy in 2009, had 2 or 3 seasons of an 80s show (alongside my Disney DTV sequel collection, Lion King 1 1/2 was my favourite) on DVD that I watched obsessively. I still haven't seen 100% of cartoons released after I was born that didn't air on free-to-air TV. At least we got Regular Show and Adventure Time. Mum wouldn't let me watch The Simpsons though. She thought it was too low-brow.
Donnie was my favourite, for the record. Honestly a very effective psychological profiling system. You can glean a lot about me from that. For example, I'd rather have a large stick than a sword, should I be placed in a scenario wherein I'm expected to engage in mortal combat. Also, I prefer the colour purple. Never thought I'd get so personal on this site.
Part of what allows this to stand as an actual achievement in this form, rather than an exclusively cynical exercise in brand synergy, is the astonishing talent behind it. You got the Streets of Rage 4 people on deck. You got the Scott Pilgrim people on deck. There was no way this would be anything less than a gorgeous, stylised throwback with rock-solid fundamentals. Perhaps it's a bit disappointing that it never exceeds these expectations, but it unquestionably matches them.
The actual bummer is how mechanically shallow it is. I hadn't played SOR4 the last time I took revenge on Shredder, and the contrast is pretty hard to ignore. There's not much to the actual combat once you get over the glorious sounds of the punching and hitting. It takes a long time to do so, there are so damn many bells and whistles to distract you from it (goddamn the boss fights here are good) but eventually, you will clue into how little depth your character has.
But I don't care. Remember? I'm indulging myself here. As a fan of [Product], they get it! The personality is all here. Of course they get a power meter recharge when they taunt. Of course Mikey's taunt is the chicken dance. Of course he says 'mongo combo dude' every time you get a big combo. Of course they announce the title of each episode the way they do. Of course the 'Shredder's Revenge' part of the title is said by a guy doing the exact right EVIL voice on the title screen. Of course resurrecting your teammates involves an animation of coaxing them with slices of pizza. Of course THAT is the final boss fight. It's perfect!
I'm sick right now (decidedly not in a fun way) and have to do a lot of work for university in a very short period. I needed some comfort food before I drugged myself with nighttime cold & flu tablets and collapsed unconscious. I sat down to play this just for a little respite, my roommate was on the couch, I handed him the second controller and gestured in the direction of the glorious sounds emanating from Tee Lopes' perfect soundtrack and we beat the whole thing in one sitting. Videogames are a beautiful thing.