WHAT DID THEY DO TO TINY TIGER, THEY 240P YOUTUBE CHIPMUNK REMIXED HIS VOICE
THE GAME'S SO REPETITIVE DUDE. Run through the most barren wastelands in gaming history, if you're lucky you'll stumble upon a rock in the middle of your path that serves no gameplay purpose. EVERYTHING is brown or grey, I saw a slope with grass on at one point and ejaculated. AND PAINTINGS. ONE OF THE LEVELS HAS PAINTINGS ON THE WALL. They're low poly and the lighting's dark so they're not very pronounced but PAINTINGS FUCK YES
The gameplay is so DULL. Run into an empty room, spam square. Then run into an empty room, spam square... alright then run into an empty room, spam squ
THE TITANS, YOU CAN CONTROL GIANT SUPER POWERED MONSTERS HOLY SHIT HERE WE GO... to run into an empty room, spam squa- FUCK. AND IT'S SOMEHOW EVEN MORE BORING THAN CRASH'S GAMEPLAY. The Titans' are so sluggish, I don't think you can actually call it "spamming" square THE ANIMATIONS TAKE SO LONG TO FINISH.
PLATFORMING. I JUST STUMBLED UPON A PLATFORMING SEGMENT, FINALLY YES. Okay so first you jump on the biggest, widest platform in the history of architecture. Don't worry if you defy all odds and find a way to miss it, here's a glide button too. Alright so from that platform you wanna jump to this other gigantic, 500 mile wide platform... YOU DID IT, THAT'S THE ENTIRE PLATFORMING SEGMENT LET'S FUCKING GOOOOOOOO
The coin sound effect is re-used from The Simpsons: Hit & Run, constantly reminding me I could be playing a much better game right now
THE GAME'S SO REPETITIVE DUDE. Run through the most barren wastelands in gaming history, if you're lucky you'll stumble upon a rock in the middle of your path that serves no gameplay purpose. EVERYTHING is brown or grey, I saw a slope with grass on at one point and ejaculated. AND PAINTINGS. ONE OF THE LEVELS HAS PAINTINGS ON THE WALL. They're low poly and the lighting's dark so they're not very pronounced but PAINTINGS FUCK YES
The gameplay is so DULL. Run into an empty room, spam square. Then run into an empty room, spam square... alright then run into an empty room, spam squ
THE TITANS, YOU CAN CONTROL GIANT SUPER POWERED MONSTERS HOLY SHIT HERE WE GO... to run into an empty room, spam squa- FUCK. AND IT'S SOMEHOW EVEN MORE BORING THAN CRASH'S GAMEPLAY. The Titans' are so sluggish, I don't think you can actually call it "spamming" square THE ANIMATIONS TAKE SO LONG TO FINISH.
PLATFORMING. I JUST STUMBLED UPON A PLATFORMING SEGMENT, FINALLY YES. Okay so first you jump on the biggest, widest platform in the history of architecture. Don't worry if you defy all odds and find a way to miss it, here's a glide button too. Alright so from that platform you wanna jump to this other gigantic, 500 mile wide platform... YOU DID IT, THAT'S THE ENTIRE PLATFORMING SEGMENT LET'S FUCKING GOOOOOOOO
The coin sound effect is re-used from The Simpsons: Hit & Run, constantly reminding me I could be playing a much better game right now