DLC Quest is a platformer where the twist is that basic game features are unavailable until you pay for them with in-game money. It's far from an innovative idea, as before this game was released, there were several flash games built around the same concept, which is a variation of the metroidvania gameplay loop: get new ability, unlock new area, except, instead of finding another ability in that area, you find more money, the exact amount you need to take back to the shop to get said ability and resume the loop.

From that description alone, it's evident why this loop is not seen much in larger-scale games: having to collect every single coin in an area, then having to head back to the shop for every single new unlock quickly gets tiring. Not to mention, it makes the game predictable as you can tell how it will go from the very beginning.

But ha-ha, it's criticising the AAA industry and its circa-2010 DLC practices! Except, it's really hard to respect that criticism since, as far as indie games go, DLC Quest is a comparable blight: hideous, low-effort aesthetics trying to pass off as retro, an unoriginal idea done in a flashy, look-at-me way to attempt to capitalize on viral trends, and a complete hack job of game mechanics.

On that last point: undoing the last hope DLC Quest had to be fun, it plays like baby's first game dev tutorial. One of the bad ones, the ones that teach you naive implementations of basic mechanics that are held together by duct tape and prayer. Between unresponsive controls, awful hitboxes and the most hilariously broken jump mechanic I have ever seen to this day, I can visualize the code in my head, and I do not like it.

So to summarize, imagine someone tells you a joke. It's not a good one, but you giggle out of respect. Now imagine they tell you the same joke again, letter to letter. And again. And again. Repeat for over an hour. That's how playing DLC Quest feels like. I know it's only five or three or something dollars. Don't. Your time is worth more than that.

Reviewed on Oct 23, 2022


Comments