Uncharted: Golden Abyss has all the charm, humor and joy of an Uncharted game combined with all the pains of playing a handheld launch title. Because so many portable games just have to be extra with all their gimmicky touch screen and motion control mechanics, this holds back Golden Abyss from reaching the heights of the mainline series, but you'll find even with its flaws its a great little journey with everyones favorite fortune hunter.

Also im sorry this review is so long, I had a lot to say. TLDR: game is good, fuck collectibles

Against what you may expect from a spinoff like this, Golden Abyss has taken no shortcuts. In fact, It's just as long as most of the mainline games. Of course it doesnt quite reach the scale of them, but it really manages to feel like it belongs in the series. Chase is no Elena, but shes a good companion throughout the game, and Sully is as great as his usual self. In a series where the villains are usually pretty unremarkable, Dante is a pretty entertaining one. Maybe the best in the series even. But the real main antagonist, Guerro is as action move villain cardboard cutout as the rest of them. The story is pretty intriguing, and I appreciate theres no supernatural twist but an actually pretty neat explanation for things. The music especially towards the end is really great as per usual. The shooting in Uncharted has never been anything special but despite being on a handheld its still pretty enjoyable on this one. The ending is satisfying and funny just like the rest of them.

Now, onto the problems. As mentioned the overabundance and overreliance on gimmick mechanics can be frustrating at times. Especially with how they implement the rear touchpad. If you're not holding the vita in a specific (sometimes uncomfortable way) Drake will act like a complete dumbass while climbing. Theres also two overly long boss fights with a lot of swiping qtes that was a bit of a pain. But theres also some nice ideas like charcoal rubbings and the way grenades are handled, even a cool part where you have to shine a light on your vita. These were actually pretty enjoyable, even if they hurt the chance of this game ever getting ported. I played on hard to prepare for my crushing playthrough and for the most part it felt pretty fair. There are a few sections where you're on a rope with no cover and more than a handful of guys are shooting at you which were kinda aggravating but this wasnt too much of an issue. Checkpoints are mostly pretty good but theres a few that take you just too far back and hinder things a bit, even though its ultimately not much of an issue either. But surprisingly the worst thing about this game isnt any of that at all. I think the worst thing about this game is actually shared with Uncharted 4. And its the collectibles. Now, Drake obviously collects artifacts and shit. Thats kinda his whole job. But this game just has way too fucking many. Theres gotta be nearly 200 minimum in this bitch. There is so many collectibles that there are literally collectibles in the cutscenes. Yeah. You gotta tap the screen while they're on to collect them. While that actually was a nice change of pace, it just kinda shows the sheer volume of them. This turned what should of been a nice fun little 10 hour romp into spring cleaning hell. With a game at that length, having a dozen collectibles hidden every ten feet from eachother really slows down the pacing and experience. ITs a big part of why i didnt vibe with 4 as much. Now you could argue that these are completely inconsequential and optional, which would be perfectly fair. But for me, I like getting them in games. I have a chill time just following guides and getting the trophies for them. But this game just takes it way too far. It probably doubled my entire playtime, and jokes on me I still missed some ;-;. Im hoping that my crushing playthrough without any collectibles will help me appreciate everything a bit more, and I plan to replay the rest of the series eventually as well. Also really unrelated but theres a trophy for getting 70 kills with a shotgun that is barely in the game with probably not even half that much ammo for it total if you somehow got one shot one kill with it. Which on hard at least is basically impossible, often took two point blank headshots to kill. Which is not how shotguns should work. Im getting off track

Anyways, rant over. Basically. This is a really great spinoff handheld. Just keep your sanity and dont try to platinum this. Please.

Edit 5/6: Got the platinum, game was actually a lot easier this time around on crushing than hard. Game is way more fun when you're not stopping for collectibles

Trophy Completion - 100%
Time Played - 36 hours 38 minutes
Nancymeter - 79/100
Game Completion #51 of 2022
May Completion #1