My first sixteen minutes with this game, summarized:
Round 1:
-- Start up game, am asked to press a button on my controller or keyboard to determine device. Press a button, it recognizes a gamepad, then refuses to accept any further gamepad inputs and locks out the keyboard, preventing me from doing anything other than ALT-TABbing out and quitting manually from Steam.
Round 2:
-- Restart game, pick keyboard this time, pick a class with limited info on each class (I chose Wood Elf because she looked the least doofy), started game.
-- Load screens
-- Lots of narrative with missing audio on some lines and some misspellings of subtitles
-- Load screens
-- I kill things, then can't proceed forward because the game demands I use one of my few heal potions to heal myself while fully healed
-- I relent, gain a level in the next room, get interrupted about how skills work when leveling up
-- Try to mess with skills, get told I can't mess with skills right now...you're a rude game
-- Get to the top of the tower, get a cutscene where I'm told I have to fight this evil magic lady and ready my blades even though I'm an archer
-- I'm ready!
-- I'm not ready, because the game tells me I lost the fight and was left for dead when people who despise magic show up and accuse me of killing the king
-- I'm like, "Yo, I'm an archer and I don't use spells," and they're like, "Screw you, you're alive, so it had to be you even though you were left for dead!"
-- Some random dude comes in during the neverending cutscenes to tell them they're all stupid and that it was magic done by somebody else
-- Magic haters be like, "Whoa, random dude, we'll listen! Thanks for telling us we were dumb!"
-- Somewhere in there was some more load screens
-- Game resumes and I quit, an absolute winner.
Round 1:
-- Start up game, am asked to press a button on my controller or keyboard to determine device. Press a button, it recognizes a gamepad, then refuses to accept any further gamepad inputs and locks out the keyboard, preventing me from doing anything other than ALT-TABbing out and quitting manually from Steam.
Round 2:
-- Restart game, pick keyboard this time, pick a class with limited info on each class (I chose Wood Elf because she looked the least doofy), started game.
-- Load screens
-- Lots of narrative with missing audio on some lines and some misspellings of subtitles
-- Load screens
-- I kill things, then can't proceed forward because the game demands I use one of my few heal potions to heal myself while fully healed
-- I relent, gain a level in the next room, get interrupted about how skills work when leveling up
-- Try to mess with skills, get told I can't mess with skills right now...you're a rude game
-- Get to the top of the tower, get a cutscene where I'm told I have to fight this evil magic lady and ready my blades even though I'm an archer
-- I'm ready!
-- I'm not ready, because the game tells me I lost the fight and was left for dead when people who despise magic show up and accuse me of killing the king
-- I'm like, "Yo, I'm an archer and I don't use spells," and they're like, "Screw you, you're alive, so it had to be you even though you were left for dead!"
-- Some random dude comes in during the neverending cutscenes to tell them they're all stupid and that it was magic done by somebody else
-- Magic haters be like, "Whoa, random dude, we'll listen! Thanks for telling us we were dumb!"
-- Somewhere in there was some more load screens
-- Game resumes and I quit, an absolute winner.