I do not know a single person who didn't cry at the end of this game. You're a fucking bitch, I'm a fucking bitch. Let's tug on this thread of emotional repression and bawl like infants.

What is Mother 3? I genuinely don't know. A journey in processing grief and trauma? How the world and everything you know changes under malevolent force? That we are all fated to die, so make the little moments count? Cowboy ninjas are an evergreen combination? Maybe the game is trying to tell us frogs in little red cars are peak pixel art. Like I said, I don't fucking know what I was supposed to take away from the game. I am just genuinely happy I experienced it.

This game is not as good as Earthbound, but it has better combat and it's themes definitely stand on it's own. It's much darker, but it gives more pop when something silly/absurd happens.

My question is what's up with the manly fairies. Are they trans? Are they an exaggeration of drag queens? I don't know what's going on with them, but I don't know why one had to do something very, VERY fucked that caused this game to never be officially translated or ported and it NEVER WILL BE. Itoi absolutely lost his mind and did something very brave and I can't say that it landed. You know what I'm talking about. They went to a place NO OTHER GAME went to and I don't know why they used the fairies to do it. Seems subtextually and overtly disrespectful to the LGBT community. If that's what it takes to get psychic powers I'll hop in that hot spring but like are we SURE like I couldn't watch a Youtube tutorial or take a community college course?

Can you imagine Iwata or Miyamoto playing a review copy of this game because they famously didn't give a shit as it was in development for like 10 years -- and their eyeballs shooting out of their sockets at that scene? Straight up, people high up did not see that scene before it released, because after it released -- this game was put in jail. I can't say I blame them. It seems really difficult to edit that scene out to because there's a good 10-15 minute sequence that's important to the plot that if was cut out would make things fall apart.

Lucas being a crybaby bitch makes people resent him, but his tears are warranted. You have to take step back and realize what this kid has gone through and is still willing to kill turbo Donald Trump for the remaining good left in his world. He is the best of us.

It's a beautiful, messy journey that will have you caring about your own life and the impact you have in it. That's Mother 3' gift. It's other gift to you is making you cry like a motherfucker; 3-4 times at least. If you're reading this and you DIDN'T cry at all then you're a Porky ass bitch. Go to therapy.

Wherever you landed on how you feel about the game, you can agree that we don't get real shit like this all that often. I invite anyone who read all this to tell me what the game meant to you. Even if you identify with being a Porky ass bitch. This game changes people. I will always be curious by the impact highly emotional media has on others.

Reviewed on Dec 19, 2023


1 Comment


4 months ago

As a fellow crybaby bitch I love Lucas and I hope that one day I choose to be as good and kind as him if/when I lose as much as he does. Also yeah I cried