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--

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1 day

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October 19, 2023

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DISPLAY


Actual sludge. From beginning to end, playing Circle of the Moon felt like trodding neck deep through a swamp.

Where to start? The abysmal walking speed that's somehow less bearable than Adventure/Belmont's Revenge, which is then remedied by the most dumbfounding addition to any game with an interconnected map: Running by means of double tapping a direction. Double tap, then double jump to reach a ledge. Whoops, there's another ledge to your back. Time to double tap on the opposite direction, then double jump again. Whoops, there's another ledge to your back. Over and over again.

The most soul draining, depressing rewards ever placed behind breakable walls. Do you like getting an HP up for your troubles? How about an MP up? How does a Heart Max up sound? And how do you feel about an HP up now? MP up tonight, baby? Over and over again.

It's not like there's any kind of different rewards they could've placed on those hidden rooms-- Hold up...

Pretty interesting card system right? You can mix and match different cards to get unique skills. What's that? You want to add more cards to your collection? Hope you like grinding the same enemies to get a card to drop, only to find that the effects you get from it aren't even that impressive. Or, you know, you could just use the card swap glitch to use whichever combination you want, whenever. In either case, get ready to bring up that main menu, over and over again.

And hey! They even brought back some classic tracks like Sinking Old Sanctuary! It's a little shitty that it plays during a portion of the game where you have little to no movement skills, meaning it'll feel as if it's looping infinitely. It's even weirder that it plays on the literal final room in the game, too. And in some area transitions. Over and over again.

Over and over and over and over and over. Everything in this game circles back around itself making for an ouroboros of bullshit.

Attacks don't cancel when you land, exploring feels like a slog even after unlocking movement relics, the story-- which is something I don't really care about in most Castlevania games-- actually had me rolling my eyes with the one(01) twist it had, character design feels flat across the board except for Camilla, animations look stiff, good GOD this is awful.

This fucking game ACTUALLY had me looking up how to do TWO frame perfect glitches so I could instantly nuke everything on my second playthrough to get all achievements before dropping it and never touching it again.

This is inexcusable. It's so painfully obvious that a B team worked on this. No wonder it was taken off the official timeline; the fact they plastered Nathan's dumbass face all over the Advance Collection is baffling, simply inconceivable. GBA Castlevania is known for Aria of Sorrow, and for a DAMN good reason.

Maybe if I played this when I was little I could see past its flaws thanks to nostalgia, but as it stands, Circle of the Moon is not only the worst Castlevania game in my personal totem pole, it's one of my least favorite games period, and the first 0,5 rating in my profile. Never would have guessed that a CV title would get that honor, but here we are. Fuck this game.