The Sims was bombastic, life-changing, even, back in the now ancient year of 2000.

I swear to y'all: I couldn't wrap my childish mind around the idea of a life simulation game hyped to be so deep. It wasn't as deep as I expected back then (I expected The Sims 3 right off the bat), but it was amazing as it was.

The Sims 1 is iconic. Now that I'm balding and getting a pouch belly, I think a lot about Bob Newbie, who was bald, had a pouch, and what looked like garbage juices spread around his clothes. I've never looked as dirty as Bob Newbie, but, who knows? Give me some time.

The songs are a whole thing in this game. Are children ready for jazz? Are children ready for the most melancholic piano pieces since the XIXth century? People at Maxis judged this questions and decided that yes, children deserved to hear amazing, mature music.

I remember the somberest of pieces, which popped in sometimes in building mode. That song made me suddenly reflexive and a little afraid. Sometimes I got a prank call a little after hearing the somber song. "You have been warned. They're coming for you" - said the trickster looking happy mask on the phone. After that, young me could barely move his legs to the kitchen to drink a glass of water. The Sims 1 spooked me like that.

I used a bazillion cheat codes for TS1. If you think that real adults lives are too busy, grindy and unrewarding, you should really experience The Sims 1 to see how bad all that stuff can get. The Sims 1 is a distopic capitalist experience. I'm sure that someone already defended this on some reddit post or youtube video, because it is so true. The Sims 1 is a game in which you NEGLECT YOUR NEEDS in order to PROGRESS at WORK, and you'll HAVE NO FRIENDS.

You'll poop for FORTY MINUTES, cook for TWO HOURS, call someone to your house, and then hug them until your sim FALL ON THE FLOOR FROM EXAUSTION. The time economy is bananas, and it is crooked against you.

Will I ever play The Sims 1 again? I don't think so. But I'll never forget this game and all the ideas and experiences that surrounded it. I love The Sims.

Reviewed on Apr 12, 2024


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