There's a certain asparagus quality to this video game, where your immediate reaction will be absolute disgust, as you bite into it expecting a high-octane speedrunning platformer, only to be immediately met with half an hour of anime characters talking about how heavy their boobs are, but later realize that it's actually not that bad and actually sort of charming.
Listen, I don't blame anybody for having a visceral reaction to seeing the words "simp" and "kpop" written on screen in bold font, but I think I have cast away my God-given right to criticize dialogue to the darkest pits of hell by having Danganronpa V3 at an 8/10. I really thought I would hate the story, but I was getting surprisingly invested in the characters by the end. I think it's just that immediate shock of "hey, wait a second, this is not what I signed up for" you feel at the beginning that drives people away.
The main thing here is the gameplay anyway, and I think 99% of people can agree that it rocks. It feels so good to control, glide through everything, slam into wall, lose 0.07 seconds of your time, press F key to restart because you're no longer perfect, slam into wall again, ...
You're not even doing anything all that impressive most of the time, but god damn this game makes you feel like the baddest motherfucker around. I often found myself pulling off the coolest moves ever, only to see that I'm like 500-thousandth on the leaderboard and barely qualified for the gold medal. Too bad, guess I'll have to go faster next time.
It's just so fun. Humans love going fast, humans love throwing rocks at brightly colored objects, humans love receiving shiny medals for going fast and throwing rocks at brightly colored objects. It's like the perfect video game recipe.
I like to believe that our primal ancestors are smiling down on us as we try noclipping through a wall to get to the purple gift so we can give it to the half-naked bunny girl and enter one of her CBT dungeon bonus levels. Merry Christmas. Save the turtles. Eat asparagus.
Listen, I don't blame anybody for having a visceral reaction to seeing the words "simp" and "kpop" written on screen in bold font, but I think I have cast away my God-given right to criticize dialogue to the darkest pits of hell by having Danganronpa V3 at an 8/10. I really thought I would hate the story, but I was getting surprisingly invested in the characters by the end. I think it's just that immediate shock of "hey, wait a second, this is not what I signed up for" you feel at the beginning that drives people away.
The main thing here is the gameplay anyway, and I think 99% of people can agree that it rocks. It feels so good to control, glide through everything, slam into wall, lose 0.07 seconds of your time, press F key to restart because you're no longer perfect, slam into wall again, ...
You're not even doing anything all that impressive most of the time, but god damn this game makes you feel like the baddest motherfucker around. I often found myself pulling off the coolest moves ever, only to see that I'm like 500-thousandth on the leaderboard and barely qualified for the gold medal. Too bad, guess I'll have to go faster next time.
It's just so fun. Humans love going fast, humans love throwing rocks at brightly colored objects, humans love receiving shiny medals for going fast and throwing rocks at brightly colored objects. It's like the perfect video game recipe.
I like to believe that our primal ancestors are smiling down on us as we try noclipping through a wall to get to the purple gift so we can give it to the half-naked bunny girl and enter one of her CBT dungeon bonus levels. Merry Christmas. Save the turtles. Eat asparagus.