I Am Bad At Mega Man X. It thinks I’m bad, and I return the sentiment.

I’ve tried to like the Mega Man platformers so many times in my life. I want to enjoy the original games. I want to dig the X series. I have fond memories of renting one of the Legends releases on PS1 as a child, perhaps my most tangible memory of Blockbuster stores. But the games repel me. I rarely feel the challenge is fair, or that the game respects my time. Or me as a person, damn near. There is a secret, optimized order to take the stages on. You’ll only ever know if you luck into it or beat your head against the game for far longer than I’m willing to.

I think Zero is a really cool character. The Penguin is easy at least, and felt fair — but it’s unfortunate the one I think is fairest is also regarded as the easiest.

Maybe another day, I’ll try again, as I have intermittently across the past couple decades. Maybe not. I wouldn’t mind if I never get good at these.