There is a common myth that Subspace Emissary is good. This is false. Subspace Emissary is bad.

To begin with, the gameplay is bad. Smash is not a platformer. But the games' singleplayer modes have kept trying to force it into being one, even though every character is floaty and awkward to control in a regular platforming environment. But even if the characters controlled well, the levels would still be terrible - they are dull, dull, dull, with a love for gimmicks everyone hates like auto-scrolling. And then there are the bosses - bosses are universally unfun and terrible in every Smash game, and Brawl is no exception. Unfortunately they're one of the few times where Subspace actually lives up to its crossover ideals.

And the integration of graphics and gameplay is terrible as well. Making everything realistic was probably a mistake. But if you're going to make everything realistic, then actually bother to integrate the gameplay elements into the environment instead of having a bunch of floating platforms and glowing doors connected to nothing (especially egregious when e.g. the stage gimmick is switching between two different versions of the level, distinguished by nothing by minor color scheme changes). And if you're not going to do that, then at least try to make sure the cutscenes and gameplay environment match instead of looking completely different.

And onto the story and setting, this is perhaps Subspace's biggest failure. Who was asking for this? Who didn't want to fight classic enemies in iconic environments, but instead fight the "Subspace Army", a group of dull enemies with no consistency in design or style, in such thrilling environments as "the Forest" or "the Plain"? Occasionally it does strike upon an interesting idea like the Ruined Zoo, but without any context it's empty. People often cite the cutscenes as a high point, and some are indeed good. But for every cutscene that has a neat character moment, there's another one where the characters nod at each other and run off into the character select screen transition.

I'll end this review by plagiarising Tim Brayton's Attack of the Clones review:

Anyway, who comes along, riding to the rescue, but our old friend Nobuo Uematsu? The theme to Brawl is better than miraculous - it might actually be the best of all the Smash games. It is powerful and resonant enough to make terrible scenes look better and good scenes look astonishing - the game's final scene of the characters facing the sunset as the main theme plays in full is so exciting and transporting that it's actually enough to send you on your way convinced you just played something dramatic and intense and wholly enthralling.

The rest of the game is better, but then I remember that all the good DK songs are on fucking Rumble Falls and I'm disinclined to be positive towards it.

Reviewed on Mar 25, 2024


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