This is genuinely the worst game I have ever played. I raced this game with a friend and beat it, I don't think I would've ever beaten it if there weren't other friends in a Discord call egging us on.

Wild Woody is the worst controlling platformer I have ever played. Even games with intentionally awkward or unpredictable controls have a method and reason behind them, but Wild Woody has no such thing. Even when you think you have Woody's "momentum" based jumps under control, the buggy collision and shotty input detection make every action a dice roll. Sketches serve as transformation-esque powerups, and they're their own can of worms. They're temporary, but have such unintuitive controls that it's likely you won't ever learn the controls of any of the sketches. Using one also makes Woody shorter, further limiting his already terrible platforming abilities.

Wild Woody is a miserable experience if you decide to play it for more than ten minutes (and to be frank, that's a generous amount). It's a shame too, since a lot of ideas the game has could be really fun if they weren't executed with such gracelessness. I like Woody as a sort of over-the-top parody of other "WILD" cartoon mascots of the 90's, and a lot of the music hits a sort of rebellious punk vibe that works really well. Need I mention the hilarious FMV cutscenes? It all screams 90's video game culture and I'm all here for it, even if the game isn't doing it ironically.

Overall, Wild Woody is not worth literally any of your time. If you want to check it out, just watch the short Oney Plays series on Youtube, it's a lot more pleasant than playing the game for yourself.

Reviewed on Jul 23, 2021


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