ight so this games in two parts so im separating the review into two parts

SODA DRINKER PRO
it's ight. it's a servicable sorta 3d yume nikki affair; you wander around weird looking areas with little cohesion until the end. interesting dialogue throughout, genuinely unnerving at a lot of points. the slow movement's a little grating and the variety in the levels is a little sparse, but it gets the job done. music goes fucking insane tho, if someone knows where i can find the full ost i'd be very grateful cuz its some fucking crazy ambient shit.

VIVIAN CLARK
I'm a bit of a cynic. it takes a lot to warm this cold dead heart of mine, and even then, the entire time playing this game i had a big dumb smile on my face. its so charming! reminds me a lot of the endless heart that comes from the art of people like rodney greenblatt, the sort you can tell just comes from deep in the soul. the game's admittedly very esoteric but once you figure out what the hell's going on its a really cool minigame compilation wrapped in a nice warm loving hug. i could not imagine actually finishing it tho!

anyway yeah this game's really cool i like it a lot two thumbs up

"OH BOYYY SODAAAAAAA!"
its almost like a playable adult swim gag and i mean tht in a good way
soda drinker pro has about 102 levels and some of them were blurs but this isnt really a game i can think of you getting a lot of humorous enjoyment out of in a consecutive hour and a half of playtime.. Probably
atleast, thats how i felt lol
Like i was amused! and i enjoyed seeing all the different locations and differences but I dont think this is the type of thing to be played all in one shot

I think the movement speed is objectively awful though for some of these other objectives with achievements and such
infact you can just hold the buttons to drink soda the whoole time and be done with it real quick
but that isnt really very much fun because theres a lot of silly stuff to encounter just by soaking it in

you could say this is a game best suited for sips and not shotgunning the whole thing at once, i liked it :)

also this game released the exact same day as Homestuck ended

what?

well its true

For as much as I love to meme this game and talk about how absurd the creation of Soda Drinker Pro is, it's not exactly fun to play if we're being serious. The comedy of seeing each poorly drawn world gets old when your movement is the speed of a dying cactus. The inclusion of Vivian Clark and the mystery behind it does allure me, but it too is ultimately not worth seeing to the end. I will compliment the soundtrack for this game, available to purchase on Steam. It's good background music. Treat Soda Drinker Pro as a fun, quirky game and you'll get a fun, quirky time.

I got it for Vivian Clark, but very quickly lost interest in it. I'll probably go back to that sometime (didn't play much of it at all), but I really really loved the soda drinking stages. The walking speed had no need to be so slow, but there's something really beautiful about the stages.
The MIDI-style music with Paint style textures perfectly implements that style that many games have, but the whole game is 3D.
The selection of levels is really good too, there's a good mix of basic places that exist in life and fairly absurd places that do not.
The mesmerised narration of unconditional love for soda is very mesmerising too.