I mean, it's entertaining, I suppose. I can look at I Love You, Colonel Sanders! as a funny piece of marketing pumped out by a corporate fast-food chain, and recognize that it succeeds in what it's trying to accomplish (trying to get you hungry for KFC while trying to make you laugh for an hour), but besides that, it's kind of a "nothing" game. I guess this comes from my rather negative attitudes against corporate pandering as well as my general "meh" opinions on dating simulators/visual novels. The thing is, is that I feel I can't be too negative on this game because, at its heart, it succeeds on making at being a bog-standard visual novel, with no "gameplay" issues to boot, and it works as corporate advertising because when I just played this with a friend, he immediately ordered KFC after we got off Discord.

I dunno, it's free, only takes an hour to 90 minutes to finish, and offers a few laughs and preposterous moments to keep you entertained, but I wouldn't classify it as "good," nor would I go through the trouble of playing it again.

"More than a third of the birds on its supplier farms in the UK and Ireland suffer from a painful inflammation known as footpad dermatitis that in severe cases can prevent birds from walking normally.
Footpad dermatitis is characterised by lesions on the feet, usually because of poor ventilation and litter management. KFC said the number of birds affected had fallen from more than half to 35% in just four years, and that its top suppliers were achieving levels of 15% or below.
Nearly all the chickens reared for KFC are fast-growing breeds that take just 30 days to reach slaughter weight. The push for high growth rates and maximum amounts of breast meat has exacerbated health and welfare problems for birds, including inability to move and liver and heart failure." - Alvorada Foundation

"Rev Up Those Fryers, Cause I'm Sure Hungry For One 'KFC Dating Simulator'"

In 2019, KFC sponsored a game that aimed to be a dating simulator revolving around Colonel Sanders being the main love interest - yes, this is a real thing. What is more surprising, however, is that is was a fairly enjoyable experience full of charm and humor. A colorful cast of characters (and a few pretty original ones) populate the game's 2-3 hour runtime, and there is a decent story to be experienced here. However, despite the tongue-in-cheek humor, this game does have some flaws that prevent it from being a more solid experience.

First, the positives - the game is really goofy, and runs with that sentiment throughout its length. The scenarios presented are random and hilarious, and the characters all have a quirky nature to them that allows them to be easily integrated to the plot. Additionally, the art style is pretty good looking! The environments, while a bit limited due to the length of the game's story, are actually fairly detailed. While some areas are much more detailed than others (the Colonel's home is by far the most detailed area compared to the rest), the backgrounds avoided reusing assets from other games. The sound design is also really great, with characters making noises at perfect moments for comedic effect.

Next, the "meh" stuff - I wish the story went on a bit longer in order to give some more background to the school and characters. The game only takes place over three days, and it doesn't really give enough time for the player to become attached to any person. Yes I know, the game isn't "supposed" to take itself seriously, but in this regard I feel the game could have transcended into something else entirely. Additionally, the choice system could have been a bit more interactive and implemented in a more meaningful nature. Most of the choices end up in a fail state, unless the correct choice is made. It makes the game very linear, which is fine, but the strength of the game's plot is its biggest weakness.

The bad - at the end of the day, this is just a generic dating simulator with a bit of KFC spice added in. Its by no means "bland", but its likely never worth a replay, and will leave you feeling as if you played a slightly dressed-up dating simulator. This is a genre that I am not the biggest fan of, and I really rely on the plot and characters to carry a lot of the load in order to get me through the mostly non-interactive gameplay. This game failed to capitalize on its unique blend of quirky product-placement and goofy charm - I really thought this could've been a great game had there been a more involved plot-line + character system.

Overall, I think its a very unique game, but one that lacks a lot of substance. I can Recommend it, and it's definitely worth checking out for the absurdity of the situations and the humor in the game, but the game's story and lack of true depth for many characters may leave you wanting. I personally felt that it could have been a few hours longer, focusing more on the different characters, building up the lore behind the cooking academy, and even polishing up the choice systems. Hell, a cooking mini-game where you make KFC dishes would have worked wonders here! Alas, its still a game I appreciate - not only for its existence, but for being able to put a smile on my face. That's how you know something has flavor.

Now can we PLEASE get a fast food harem game?

Final Verdict: 6/10 (Above Average)