A long, long time ago, in the distant year that was 1990, there was a little redemption game that was made known as Cosmo Gangs. In this game, your main objective was to keep all of the aliens from stealing your energy boxes that you had, and you did this by picking up a light gun and shooting them all the fuck down, all while they make funny faces and noises. I myself had never heard of this game before, but based on what I’m seeing in this video here.... not gonna lie, it looks like a lot of fun. I love the charm that it just immediately gives off, with the voice acting from the aliens, the movements they make when they talk and are shot, and the simple concept that gets you immediately into the action. I would love to actually try it out one day, if I am ever to find it in any sort of arcade or theme park out there, but that most likely will never happen, which does make me incredibly sad on the inside. But hey, it’s ok, because we have the Cosmo Gang at home, and for once, Mom isn’t giving us a shitty replica! Instead, she is giving us a little gem known as Cosmo Gang the Video to satiate my Cosmo Gang needs.

Little behind-the-scenes trivia for ya, I was actually planning on returning to the Galaxian series for this review after not having talked about it for quite a long time, but unfortunately, I can’t get the game I was wanting to cover, Galaxian3: Project Dragoon, to work on an emulator, so I guess I will have to wait until later to cover that one. So, I then browsed around the web to see what else I could find, found this, saw that it was essentially the Parodius of the Galaxian series, and I was immediately on board for it. I had actually heard the name of this game thrown around once or twice before, but I had never actually taken the time to sit down and try it for myself, but now that I have, I can say with confidence that it is a pretty damn good game. It manages to keep the gameplay and flow of Galaxian just as fast, frantic, and fun as I like it, while also giving off so much charm, energy, and charisma that you will literally drown in it, it is so wonderful.

The story is pretty simple and not quite as weird as similar titles like Parodius, where the mischievous Cosmo Gang are causing havoc all over Earth at any given chance they get, so it is up to you to take the reigns of the Hyper Beat ship and teach them a lesson by exterminating all of them, which is a very simple and boring premise, but one that I am able to get behind simply because of how charming and fun it presents itself. The graphics are great, having wonderful sprites and animations given to all of the enemies and characters, giving off so much life and energy that is definitely appreciated for what kind of game this is, the music is pretty good too, being very energetic and cheerful in plenty of the tracks, and they are great to listen to, even if one of the tracks is played a little too much for my liking, and the gameplay/control is pretty much exactly like your average Galaxian game, but there are plenty of new elements and powers thrown in there to keep the game fresh, fun, and exciting almost all the way through.

The game is a vertical shmup, where you take control of that Hyper Beat starship I mentioned earlier, go through a set of 33 different stages, each one being somewhat different then the last in their own way, shoot down every single enemy that dares to come on screen, while also making sure to dodge their devastating attacks by whatever means necessary, before you end up as a rubble of space debris, gather plenty of different powerups that can help by either increasing your firepower or by temporarily immobilizing the enemies long enough for you to get a clear shot in, and take on several challenging stages to get you some extra points, while the game also mocks you if you aren’t perfect in every single way while playing these stages……. yeah, thanks a lot for that. If you have played any standard Galaxian game, then you know pretty much exactly what you are going to get out of this game, but the new additions that have been made to the formula do help make the game a whole lot more fun, along with the silliness and charm doing the rest of the heavy lifting.

If you are a fan of any other typical cute-’em-ups out there like TwinBee, Parodius, or what have you, then you would be able to get right into this game, because it makes sure to be just as silly, weird, and stupid as those other games, primarily through the Cosmo Gang themselves. They may just be your standard race of alien characters, but they manage to come off as so lovable and goofy every time they are on-screen, with the sound effects they make helping out a lot with that too, such as whenever you shoot them, or even in the instances where there is voice acting, such as when they say “I give up!” or “I’m sorry!”. Seriously, how can you not at least smile a little bit whenever they say that?

Not to mention, the game on its own manages to keep things fun and goofy as well, which can be seen with the new power ups you can acquire. Of course, you have your basic ones like a double shot and a shield, but then you have other stuff like spider webs that can slow down your enemies so that you have an easier time shooting them, vortexes that you can shoot out to instantly kill anyone that gets close to them, and even a spooky clown jumpscare face that will stun the enemies for a brief second so you can get plenty of extra shots in. These power ups are EXTREMELY handy whenever you can use them, so make sure to get them as soon as possible whenever they show up, as they make the game that much more fun and easier, and I loved getting so many different combos while using these different tools to my advantage.

The goofiness doesn’t even stop there either, as when you get to the Challenging Stages of the game, you actually take on a game that is pretty much the video game equivalent of the original redemption game, where you have to keep the Cosmo Gang from stealing a variety of things, like energy, money, cakes, and what have you. That is honestly really cool that they integrated it into the game like this, and these stages are really fun, being challenging enough from the beginning to where you will need to form a strategy on how you go about shooting these guys down, while also getting increasingly more tough and insane as these stages go on, making it so that you need fast-as-hell reflexes to keep them from stealing your shit. It all feels just right, even if, again, the game mocks you if you even slightly mess up, because it expects perfection from you.

I can’t say everything about Cosmo Gang the Video made me smile though, because there were some issues found in the game that I have gripes with, such as the fact that it does last a little long. The game can be beaten in about 30 or so minutes, which isn’t really long at all, but I dunno, something about this type of game having 33 stages doesn’t really feel quite right, and I feel like if it was shrunken down to around, say, 30 or 25 stages, then the journey may have been much smoother. Holding back on the difficulty a bit would also help as well. And then there is the final boss of the game, Don Cosmo, who is a big pain in the ass to fight. He throws everything at you, with the kitchen sink, making it extremely difficult to take him on and hit him when you have to be laser focused on dodging all of his projectiles. What also doesn’t help is the fact that he has four phases before he bows out for good, so yeah, good luck with that, and I hope you have the speed of a god, like I had to get.

Overall, despite it lasting a little long for my liking, as well as the final boss being a pain in Cosmo Gang the Ass, this was quite a surprise to be sure, as I ended up really enjoying this game in almost its entirety, having plenty of charm and personality that oozes out of every single pixel on-screen, along with familiar, yet extremely fun gameplay that does throw some neat new additions in there to keep things fresh. I would definitely recommend it for those that are big fans of the Galaxian games, as well as those who love shmups or cute-’em-ups in general, because while it ain’t perfect, you could definitely have quite a lot of fun with it, while admiring just how silly and fun it really is. Now if only I could just figure out how to actually play Galaxian3, then we could actually properly get back to that series at some point……… or I could just not, and play that one puzzle game featuring these guys instead. That’s always an option.

Game #630