EHHHHHHHHHHH. I had a hard time ranking this one. I beat it a few weeks ago and have just been mulling my thoughts.

I started a run of this game years ago when I got it but I got so bored after gym 2 I stopped. I felt it was too easy.

I beat the game doing a semi blind nuzlocke run. I'm sure most of you know what that is but if you don't: you can only catch the first pokemon you encounter in each new named area, and if your pokemon faints, it's dead and cannot be used. I throw it into the PC in a graveyard. Because Shield is a bit weird with the wild encounters being static in the overworld, I did not count any static overworld pokemon. Only grass patches. Also I played on Set mode which is way harder.

So ok, I felt the game was too easy so I added self imposed rules to make it harder. And it DID make the game more enjoyable. I didn't lose a ton of teammates, maybe around 8-9. For a mostly blind run (since I've never gone past gym 2) I thought that was pretty good, I got pretty decent encounters and variety as well. And there were a lot of moments since I was on Set mode where I really had to think about my next course of action.

There's other general stuff I like about the game. All the gym leaders are pretty cool. I love the stadium as the backdrop for everything. The new Pokemon are actually awesome and I liked a lot of them. My Greedent which was one of the first encounters I had ended up being the MVP of the entire run. Super tanky and body slam two shot basically everything. Also, it has great music like most Pokemon games.

So there's a ton of issues that bog down the experience a lot. First, Hop is mad annoying. Even with the nuzlocke rules, he was honestly super free until the very very last battle. Probably one of the weakest rivals in all the games. He feels like a way worse Barry. I get what they're going for that he's weak on purpose, but I don't think it worked because the character is still too arrogant for most of the experience. I will say that the story of his Wooloo going in and out of the team was cool.

The game is just bloated with a lot rival type characters like Hop who are way too easy and don't really contribute much. Marie is alright and she has a decent design, but she dossnt do anything other than battle you. Bede is also mad annoying. Here it felt like they were trying to do Silver again, but it also didn't work. Whatever arc is intended here, Bede is barely in the game, so it feels hollow.

To go back to Marie. Easily the worst team in all of the games. Team Yell might as well not exist, like all they do is serve as a very minor inconvenience. It's legit a team of simps.

The story in general is pretty bad. Basically anytime anything interesting happens, it's in the background and Champion Leon with his Charizard that they 100% do not make clear enough that he has a Charizard, yeah he shows up and says "I got it, you just go get the next badge." And then the stuff with Chairman Rose is so horribly forced in. And also right at the end: it felt like they just forgot about the character and were like "oh yeah, he's in the game..."

The game also feels REALLY cheap. That body slam on Greedent is strong but the animation is laughable. I think they spent most of the budget on Dynamaxing animations.

So where do we rank this? I was hovering around a 3 because I did enjoy the game as a Nuzlocke. But that's a personal decision I made. I think the game as is is just average. Not AS bad as I remember, but not great.

An utter pile of garbage.

It starts fine. The controls are pretty damn good. Aiming feels smooth and shooting is punchy. that's really the only positive here.

It's butt ugly to start. Everything is poop brown or vomit color. I think this was a PSP game? It shows.

It has no real story. It's an arcade shooter. That would be fine if it was a fun arcade shooter. But this has some of the worst level design I've seen in a game.

It's punishingly hard. You die absurdly fast even on normal mode. And the enemy respawns are basically infinite. The levels are so LONG too. No checkpoints?? Whenever I died I had to repeat the last 10 minutes. It was terrible.

It has good controls but that can't save a terrible core experience.

I usually finish everything I play eventually, but I can't with this one. No thank you, goodbye.

I'm gonna say it, I don't care: I like this more than Mario Kart 8.

Im baffled, I barely even know why. It has such good variety. I love the dynamic way you shift from driving, flying and sailing. The boss fights are actually pretty tough and hold your attention. It has good content and challenges and unlocking new characters feels good.

The courses are awesome, recreating old school Sega locations and creating something fresh and new to run around in.

If this game had some kind of vehicle customization, (not the stats) it would be amazing. As is, it's still great though!

Hot take review:

I like Mario Kart 8, but I do not love it. This game is just missing something, an allure to keep me playing. It has great controls and tons of customization. The roster is decent. It's beautiful to look at and listen to. So what is it missing?

I think the courses aren't as fun this time: they either feel too expansive with not a lot going on, or they're really tight with hard turns. This is not applicable to every course mind you, but I feel like they don't stand out as much anymore. This game sorta just blends stuff together and everything can get kinda samey.


Battle Mode was so bad on Wii U they had to retool it into something better. But even still I don't find it that fun. Maybe just the courses again.

I think my biggest issue, and this isn't a fault of the game, is that they continued to bloat it with DLC for over 5 years when they could have just made another game. They're probably just waiting for the next system to do that though. But it's gonna make the next Mario kart feel small in comparison.

I think it's fun, but in bursts. Not really long term.

Hard to complain about this one. This one feels really good to play. The controls are so tight and snappy, and the karts and bikes add good variety. Cars are def too underpowered though. Bikes having inside drift is too strong.

The courses though are all great. I don't think there's a single bad track in this game honestly, maybe I'm forgetting about one. And it felt good to unlock stuff.

Really love it. Double Dash is still the king for me though, mainly out of bias, but also just finding it more fun in general.

Honestly a banger. Fun courses, cool roster. The mission mode is easily the highlight here. Something they 100% need to bring back.

Mechanically though, I don't think it's the most fun Mario kart. It's excusable since it's on a handheld though, pretty impressive what was achieved here.

I have vague memories of playing this with my cousin when we traveled to see them. I only recently got the game for myself on Wii U so I can experience the full thing!

Imagine if a game came out, with Double Dash mechanics but it also had DS's mission mode: oh wow. Now that's an idea...