2 reviews liked by kiari


I hate Fire Emblem: Three Houses. As somebody who loves Fire Emblem and played every game in the series, in my opinion, 3H comes along and takes a big fat dump on everything I enjoy in the series. In my eyes, Fire Emblem is all about unit nichification and long term planning, and 3 Houses throws this out the window by allowing you turn anybody into any class whenever you want, and even further by throwing out any kind of weapon triangle which just leads one down the road of just throwing everyone onto a horse/wyvern. This is just accentuated by the fact that outside the main lord you can recruit almost every character, which further drives the feel of monotonous slop. The story is so infuriating, since they obviously want to play politics and have a deep interesting world but it just isn't since they had to split the game into 3.5 separate routes and make them all morally justifiable to players, but they still all tell the same story of Edelgard conquering and reconquering Fodlan. Speaking of the multiple routes, clearly there was some sort of crunch or just plain laziness going on since every route has 2-3 unique maps out of the 22ish on each route, with maybe a paralogue if you're lucky. The maps arent even interesting with 90% of them being open fields with no mechanics and/or easily warp cheesed. Compare this to Fates which has 2-3 SHARED maps per route, with lots of diversity with the dragon veins and all of the revelations fuckery even if that is also bad. While I'm comparing this game to Fates, running around the castle in that game doing your mid chapter chores takes only a couple minutes tops before you are thrown right back into the next mission. In 3h mid chapters chores can easily take up to an hour, between hunting down and returning all the lost items, fishing, having 7 consecutive tea parties with the child you're grooming (not even going any further into that rabbit hole), shopping, managing battalions, and teaching the students. All so you can steamroll the next chapter with Byleth and Lord since everyone else is more or less baggage without broken personal class skill growths against the insanely inflated enemy stats by the end of the game. Not talking about the dlc cause I cannot be assed spend the $20 or a single more minute of my time on this olympic swimming pool sized hot dog water jar of a video game.Also the mole jews are fucking stupid man.

I wish pac-man would eat me like he does the dots