I've been grappling with this game for a little over two years now, and I feel like throwing in the towel. The same thing would always happen: I'd open it every couple of months, play it from a day to a week, then I'd quit out of disinterest or pure repulsion. There is nothing here that I like. Lore is dumped in ungodly amounts, the prose is purple, the music sucks, the combat is micromanagement hell, companions are too flat, it looks ugly, backer NPCs are fucking EVERYWHERE and deliver nothing of value, and the story is boring.

Of course, you could pick any of the aforementioned elements and go "nuh uh, that was actually good!" and sure, you could do that. I think combat is the most easily defensible of my complaints: it's reactive, requires no pre-buffing, and forces you to use everybody and their abilities to best your foes. In-practice however, it felt like driving during rush hour - watching companions slap around enemies in place while stopping very frequently to cast new spells and abilities in the hopes of ending the encounter quicker - it's a dire equivalent to slowly inching your car up in traffic while you sit there, bored with nothing to do. What's most annoying is how by default companions stand slack-jawed after killing an enemy: there's a whole battlefield out there dickhead, go get some action! What the hell happened to auto-attack!

I don't like this game very much.

My experience with Total War: Three Kingdoms (or TW3K) was affected by two major factors:

1. Romance of the Three Kingdoms (abbreviated to RoTK here) is one of my favorite stories, and I always enjoy adaptations of it to some degree.
2. I had never played a Total War game before this one.

The second point is self-explanatory, but the first could do with some context. RoTK is a lengthy tale about many things: the dangers of pride, the necessity of friendship, and the double-edged sword that is ambition. It chronicles the rise and fall of dynasties, the adventures and deaths of great men, and much more. Despite having a ridiculously large roster of characters, many of them remain iconic to this day. Arguably, it's one of the most famous novels ever written.

So how the hell do you adapt it into a strategy game?

The smart answer is you don't, or at least distance yourself from the idea of strict adaptational faithfulness. TW3K keeps the setting but alters the story, allowing for more player agency and action. Each campaign starts with an immediate enemy to pursue and opportunities to go off the beaten path, creating real choices from the get-go. The game embraces a sandbox approach and encourages the player to expand in any way they choose. It's an effective design for a strategy game, mirroring Civ and other 4X titles without straying too far from RoTK. This is bolstered by the unique mechanics each faction holds, ensuring plenty of varied playthroughs.

Generals having traits like greed or carelessness is a great way of connecting personality and gameplay: a cautious character may have a buff to cunning but a penalty to instinct, leading them to be proficient at giving orders but rather helpless in the heat of combat. With this system, characters resemble their novel counterparts and have tangible differences from one another: Sima Yi might not be chopping off heads like Lu Bu, but he's the go-to guy for supporting a battalion of archers.

One of my favorite parts of TW3K is the diplomatic layer. While RoTK has grand speeches and deep conversations, talks in this game are impactful and quick. Alliances can turn the tide of war, and trade can stop starvation or bankruptcy. Understanding the quirks of each leader is key to success, especially in the early game. There have been times when I enjoyed a fruitful negotiation more than a grand siege, and that's a testament to the game's utter devotion to strategy more than anything else.

Speaking of strategy and sieges, the battles are of a remarkably high quality. I understand that's Total War's strength, and as a newcomer, I've had a terrific time playing through them. Units have different strengths and weaknesses, and figuring out the best configurations for your armies isn't a simple affair. In addition to the systems in play like morale and character abilities, duels add a cinematic flair to battles. Watching massive armies clash while generals duel undisturbed in the middle is awesome and straight out of RoTK, it gives a whole new level of memorability on top of the already polished mechanics.

TW3K is stacked in every department, but the highest of its competencies is its design. It’s an excellent strategy sandbox that respects the player’s time, rewards smart thinking, and holds a lot of tactical systems without being overwhelming. Without a doubt, this is a must-play, RoTK fan or not.

Side note: If you’re interested in the game but want to learn more about RoTK, check out the first few episodes of Three Kingdoms (2010). The actor for Cao Cao is a riot.