theexecutive
2015
A lot to like here but I think it’s brought down so much by the monster sections. If it were just a few they would work well, but after a certain point they go from scary to annoying.
2021
![NieR Re[in]carnation](https://images.igdb.com/igdb/image/upload/t_cover_big/co7bm4.jpg)
There are like 2 chapters which are kind of good and everything else is ruined by the absolute mess of systems. Playing this is like discovering an innovative new form of torture
This review contains spoilers
Impossible to understate how impressive this game is. Not as much from a technical standpoint (though it has aged remarkably well for an early GameBoy game), but instead in terms of its themes and storytelling. The creators had their finger on the pulse of the medium, both for its state then and in the future. Metroid II’s deconstruction of the medium is sad and terrifying. What impressed me most is just how good it is at immersing you in its goal: the Metroids are cumbersome, fearsome, and irritating, and after a while you begin to blend with the cold, mechanical process Samus follows on her mission. Even knowing the thematic angle the game takes, its hard to view the Metroids as something worth preserving until the very end.
And then the end comes. A single, tender moment leaves your victory hollow and turns your relief to guilt and horror.
And then the end comes. A single, tender moment leaves your victory hollow and turns your relief to guilt and horror.
2020
The first half is so charming and promising. Mario’s movement is amazing, the levels are great, the game is visually and audibly gorgeous. Unfortunately, the latter half kinda sucks. The game becomes tedious and infuriating. The downsides of Mario’s movement also becomes apparent- when precision is needed, he just doesn’t fit the bill here.
I do honestly kinda like the Blue Coins. I think they fit the themes pretty well and are nice (unless you go for 100%, which the game seems to clearly guide you against doing).
I do honestly kinda like the Blue Coins. I think they fit the themes pretty well and are nice (unless you go for 100%, which the game seems to clearly guide you against doing).
2023
Why does this exist? Who thought an F-Zero battle royale game would work? The courses, virtually unchanged from the SNES game, don’t even come close to accommodating the volume of racers at any given stretch. F-Zero’s focus on precision is marred by surrounding chaos. Beyond a cheap, cynical ploy to bait nostalgia in uncritical fans, this game serves no purpose and makes no sense on any level. Maybe would have been great if this was Mario Kart instead? Whatever
1986
A beautiful mess.
There are times when this game's design choices all come together to create something great. This includes elements that people absolutely despise today, such as the limited movement, low starting health, and even repetitive corridors. At its best, Metroid is a survival horror-exploration game. It's a creepy and tense expedition, where every failure sends you crawling from base with nothing but scraps of resources to work with. The early moments of this game consist of working to progress inches at a time, praying that the world, completely apathetic to your mission, happens to let you through.
Unfortunately, there is another side to this game: the part that's really poorly designed and held together by Elmer's glue. Metroid's "limitations" are terrifying: until deranged enemy placement just makes them simply annoying. It's these times where the slow, methodical pace comes to a halt and the balancing act fails. Worse is the performance: the more poorly designed areas, often filled to the brim with monsters, make the game into a slideshow. Samus' limited mobility and combat just cease to function in these moments (like, the physics seem to break).
Overall, it sort of lives up to its reputation, which is sad. But when Metroid's design works, it outshines most of its predecessors, and its really unfortunate that this direction for the series has disappeared at this point.
There are times when this game's design choices all come together to create something great. This includes elements that people absolutely despise today, such as the limited movement, low starting health, and even repetitive corridors. At its best, Metroid is a survival horror-exploration game. It's a creepy and tense expedition, where every failure sends you crawling from base with nothing but scraps of resources to work with. The early moments of this game consist of working to progress inches at a time, praying that the world, completely apathetic to your mission, happens to let you through.
Unfortunately, there is another side to this game: the part that's really poorly designed and held together by Elmer's glue. Metroid's "limitations" are terrifying: until deranged enemy placement just makes them simply annoying. It's these times where the slow, methodical pace comes to a halt and the balancing act fails. Worse is the performance: the more poorly designed areas, often filled to the brim with monsters, make the game into a slideshow. Samus' limited mobility and combat just cease to function in these moments (like, the physics seem to break).
Overall, it sort of lives up to its reputation, which is sad. But when Metroid's design works, it outshines most of its predecessors, and its really unfortunate that this direction for the series has disappeared at this point.
2014
I liked it but it's so fucking long
Absolutely soul-crushing that something like this even exists. This seems to be made by people who cannot understand anything in the medium other than the lowest common denominator and resent any work that strives to go beyond that. Every decision made here is already awful in its own right; when taken in the context of Breath of the Wild, they're downright offensive and evil. A game about uniting the world to avert disaster? Sorry, your allies are useless in battle! Want to feel connected to the space around you? Best we can do is a glorified menu of a world map. Did you enjoy Breath of the Wild's quiet contemplation that permeated both its modern and past periods? Everything is reduced to an over-the-top battle. A lot of people liked Breath of the Wild's characters- we'll write the laziest fanservice possible so we can court the crowd that claps at logos!
If you enjoy this game's story, you are the reason this medium fucking sucks. Nothing but meaningless interactions and "cool and epic" moments can be portrayed. PLAY SOMETHING GOOD.
Fuck you. This game is nothing more than tedious and kinda evil.
If you enjoy this game's story, you are the reason this medium fucking sucks. Nothing but meaningless interactions and "cool and epic" moments can be portrayed. PLAY SOMETHING GOOD.
Fuck you. This game is nothing more than tedious and kinda evil.
2015
I'm almost impressed at how little of this game works. Every idea here is a failure both on its own and as its place in a greater whole. This game is a tedious, overlong mess that has no idea what it's trying to be.
Pretty fucking horrible patch. Endwalker has been one lackluster or bad update after another but this is the first to make me unsub in two years. Awful story direction and nothing to do outside of raiding have plagued this expansion since 6.1 and this might be the worst example of it. At least the Pandaemonium finale was pretty good?
Gamers are going to hell for mocking this when it released. Too stupid to recognize a masterpiece of the medium
2014
I wanted to like this more than I did.
I've played both Bastion and Hades before this. Hades is great, but I found Bastion incredibly underwhelming. Transistor seemed far more promising than Bastion to start. The presentation here is incredible, the premise was interesting, and the gameplay was more experimental and satisfying than the previous game's.
Transistor doesn't really get worse as it goes on (other than the pacing being wack); rather, the cracks just start to show. The story could be interesting, but it's weighed down by a clumsy method of communicating it (lore logs are usually just lame and uninspired imo) and poor characterization. The dialogue, something Bastion actually did pretty well, is also really bad.
The turn-based side of the gameplay is easily the best part of it, but the time spent in an active state is miserable. It makes the combat tedious and frustrating in ways that do not help the game's themes at all.
Still, this is probably worth playing. But definitely underwhelming.
I've played both Bastion and Hades before this. Hades is great, but I found Bastion incredibly underwhelming. Transistor seemed far more promising than Bastion to start. The presentation here is incredible, the premise was interesting, and the gameplay was more experimental and satisfying than the previous game's.
Transistor doesn't really get worse as it goes on (other than the pacing being wack); rather, the cracks just start to show. The story could be interesting, but it's weighed down by a clumsy method of communicating it (lore logs are usually just lame and uninspired imo) and poor characterization. The dialogue, something Bastion actually did pretty well, is also really bad.
The turn-based side of the gameplay is easily the best part of it, but the time spent in an active state is miserable. It makes the combat tedious and frustrating in ways that do not help the game's themes at all.
Still, this is probably worth playing. But definitely underwhelming.
2020
Genuinely amazing material that’s unfortunately surrounded by every terrible anime trope you can think of.
The game gets better and better as it goes on, but I think it takes a bit too long to get experimental at all.
About equal to BotW IMO.
Improves a lot on the original, specifically in terms of mechanics. The better dungeons are also a highlight here (thank god).
However, it's definitely not as good as the first in certain areas too. Specifically, those lonely, desolate vibes of BotW are understandably gone. This was inevitable with the nature of a sequel, but worth mentioning nonetheless.
Improves a lot on the original, specifically in terms of mechanics. The better dungeons are also a highlight here (thank god).
However, it's definitely not as good as the first in certain areas too. Specifically, those lonely, desolate vibes of BotW are understandably gone. This was inevitable with the nature of a sequel, but worth mentioning nonetheless.