The Dannest of GPTs
Ranking the Unraveled: Unleash the Power of Gaming as I Ascend from Ascendant to Appalling, with the Ultimate Catastrophe Claiming the Coveted First Place, which represents the absolute worst! (Please Note: 'Mario Kart Midnight' represents the enigmatic 'Mario Kart Black' mod, and 'Mario CTGP Rev' stands in for 'Mario Kart Wii 2.' The Placement of 'Minecraft' is Solely Informed by the Hypixel Skyblocks Experience)
Delve into the Chronicles of Gaming as I Tread the Path of Divinity, Fumbling and Soaring through Titles that Await My Verdict. 'Elden Ring,' 'Final Fantasy XIV,' 'Fire Emblem Fire and Ice,' and the Infamous 'Smarty Pants' form the Quartet Chosen to Bring Structure to the Anarchy that Is My Backlog.
Prepare to Witness the Hierarchy Unfold: From Unrivaled Grandeur to Unrelenting Misery, This List Chronicles My Odyssey through Titles that Dared to Cross My Path. So Grab Your Controllers and Brace Yourselves for the Revelation of Rankings, as I Ascend the Ladder of Digital Ascendancy!
Delve into the Chronicles of Gaming as I Tread the Path of Divinity, Fumbling and Soaring through Titles that Await My Verdict. 'Elden Ring,' 'Final Fantasy XIV,' 'Fire Emblem Fire and Ice,' and the Infamous 'Smarty Pants' form the Quartet Chosen to Bring Structure to the Anarchy that Is My Backlog.
Prepare to Witness the Hierarchy Unfold: From Unrivaled Grandeur to Unrelenting Misery, This List Chronicles My Odyssey through Titles that Dared to Cross My Path. So Grab Your Controllers and Brace Yourselves for the Revelation of Rankings, as I Ascend the Ladder of Digital Ascendancy!
213 Games
Rabbids Invasion: The Interactive TV Show seems to be in a league of its own with that delightfully idiotic EHHHYYAAA... Rabbid noise accompanying every click, which might just be its sole redeeming feature. Yet, not even this quirky quirkiness can save it from the depths of gaming oblivion. Remember the days when this was the benchmark for bad games? Ah, the nostalgia. Now, we're spoiled with a whole host of wretched titles, each boasting their own unique brand of horror, from King of Clubs to Garten of banban and beyond. One thing's for sure, none of them can quite match the unforgettable menu sound of EEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH.
Score: 2/10
Score: 2/10
13
Wii Party U, where do I even begin? This game is a prime example of how a seemingly innocent party game can turn into a button-smashing nightmare. It all started with this piece of garbage, and I can't help but wonder why it was ever created in the first place.
The premise of Wii Party U might sound promising on the surface, with its collection of mini-games and activities designed for multiplayer fun. However, the reality is far from enjoyable. The controls are clunky and unresponsive, making it a frustrating experience from the get-go.
But the real kicker is the button-smashing. It seems like the only button worth smashing in this game is the power button on your console to make it stop. The mini-games are often reduced to mindless button mashing, devoid of any strategy or skill. It quickly becomes a test of who can wear out their controller the fastest, leading to sore thumbs and a sense of regret.
The lack of depth and variety in the mini-games is astonishing. It's as if the developers ran out of ideas and decided that making players repeatedly press buttons was the way to go. There's no creativity or innovation here, just a mind-numbing repetition of the same uninspired activities.
In conclusion, Wii Party U is a button-smashing nightmare that offers little in terms of genuine fun or entertainment. It's a stain on the reputation of party games and serves as a cautionary tale of what happens when creativity takes a backseat to mindless button mashing. If you value your sanity and your controllers, steer clear of this turd of a game.
Score: 1/10
The premise of Wii Party U might sound promising on the surface, with its collection of mini-games and activities designed for multiplayer fun. However, the reality is far from enjoyable. The controls are clunky and unresponsive, making it a frustrating experience from the get-go.
But the real kicker is the button-smashing. It seems like the only button worth smashing in this game is the power button on your console to make it stop. The mini-games are often reduced to mindless button mashing, devoid of any strategy or skill. It quickly becomes a test of who can wear out their controller the fastest, leading to sore thumbs and a sense of regret.
The lack of depth and variety in the mini-games is astonishing. It's as if the developers ran out of ideas and decided that making players repeatedly press buttons was the way to go. There's no creativity or innovation here, just a mind-numbing repetition of the same uninspired activities.
In conclusion, Wii Party U is a button-smashing nightmare that offers little in terms of genuine fun or entertainment. It's a stain on the reputation of party games and serves as a cautionary tale of what happens when creativity takes a backseat to mindless button mashing. If you value your sanity and your controllers, steer clear of this turd of a game.
Score: 1/10
12
I remember when I was a kid, around 5 or 6 years old, and I used to love playing Kinect Sports on our Xbox. But one day, my mom wouldn't let me play because I hadn't done my chores. I was so mad that I stormed off to my room, plotting my revenge. Then, I got a mischievous idea while sitting on the toilet. I won't go into details, but let's just say I tried to play a prank involving catching my own poop. It didn't go well the first time, but the next day, I was determined. Fast forward a few weeks, and my parents were puzzled by a strange smell in their bedroom. Little did they know, I had hidden my "experiment" under their bed. They were horrified when they found it, and even blamed it on someone else! To this day, they still don't know the truth.
Score: 1/10
Score: 1/10
11
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Smash-Up, or should I say "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Karate Clash," is a catastrophic cacophony of chaos that dares to trample on the delicate sensibilities of fighting game aficionados. This wretched abomination of a title commits the unforgivable sin of introducing Master Splinter, the one character who possesses the hallowed knowledge of karate. Yes, dear reader, you heard that correctly — karate! It's as if the developers never grasped the fundamental tenets of competitive combat within the realms of pixelated pugilism!
In the vast pantheon of fighting games, the cardinal rule dictates that no character should hold an unfair advantage, especially in the realm of martial arts mastery. Yet, in their profound wisdom, the creators of this calamity saw fit to bestow Master Splinter with this unholy power. Did they not comprehend that this sacrilege would render all other fighters mere mortals in the presence of a karate-kicking rodent?
It is a regrettable state of affairs when the most memorable aspect of a fighting game is the blatant disregard for the art of balanced combat. While the heroes in a half-shell may hold a cherished place in our hearts, their venture into the fighting game arena reeks of amateur design and an ignorance of the martial arts metagame.
In my humble estimation, I bestow upon this travesty a resounding 1 out of 10, for it has flouted the very essence of fair competition, leaving only a foul taste of missed potential in its wake.
In the vast pantheon of fighting games, the cardinal rule dictates that no character should hold an unfair advantage, especially in the realm of martial arts mastery. Yet, in their profound wisdom, the creators of this calamity saw fit to bestow Master Splinter with this unholy power. Did they not comprehend that this sacrilege would render all other fighters mere mortals in the presence of a karate-kicking rodent?
It is a regrettable state of affairs when the most memorable aspect of a fighting game is the blatant disregard for the art of balanced combat. While the heroes in a half-shell may hold a cherished place in our hearts, their venture into the fighting game arena reeks of amateur design and an ignorance of the martial arts metagame.
In my humble estimation, I bestow upon this travesty a resounding 1 out of 10, for it has flouted the very essence of fair competition, leaving only a foul taste of missed potential in its wake.
10
Onrush, a descent into vehicular purgatory where the only escape is the repetitive loop of hitting opponents at the exact same speed. The game, akin to a prison, forces players to endure the pointlessness of endless redundancy. The futile attempts at achieving objectives only lead to perpetual failure via automobile accidents, trapping players in a never-ending cycle. The chaotic music transitions, ranging from screamo to dubstep, create an auditory nightmare that complements the visual madness of the game.
In Onrush, every collision with fake cars feels like a purposeful obstruction, crumbling the player's will to dust. Boosts, initially promising hope, reveal themselves as irrelevant in the face of constant competition. The game, with its disjointed experience and relentless repetition, becomes a psychological tormentor, exploiting moments of hope to intensify the ensuing despair. It's an exercise in nihilism, where playing Onrush feels more pointless than Kairi's contribution to the Kingdom Hearts story.
Score: 1/10
In Onrush, every collision with fake cars feels like a purposeful obstruction, crumbling the player's will to dust. Boosts, initially promising hope, reveal themselves as irrelevant in the face of constant competition. The game, with its disjointed experience and relentless repetition, becomes a psychological tormentor, exploiting moments of hope to intensify the ensuing despair. It's an exercise in nihilism, where playing Onrush feels more pointless than Kairi's contribution to the Kingdom Hearts story.
Score: 1/10
9
I stand here, bewildered and questioning the choices that led me to encounter not one, not two, but five games that are somehow worse than this abomination called Club Penguin: Game Day! It's as if the game developers embarked on a journey to craft a digital monstrosity so grotesque that even Satan himself would disown it.
From the moment this wretched title infects your beloved Wii or Wii U console, you'll find yourself contemplating drastic measures. Burying your gaming systems and sending their remains hurtling into the abyss of an asteroid belt might seem like the only recourse to cleanse your digital soul of the horrors within.
The nightmares of this cursed game haunt my every waking moment. I still shudder at the recollection of that abominable snowball minigame, where a skunk carcass served as the main antagonist. It's as if the game designers were in a contest to see who could create the most absurd and nightmarish scenario.
As the madness unfolded, I made it my solemn mission to subject myself to a relentless barrage of bad video games, all in the hope that Club Penguin: Game Day! might ascend from the depths of gaming hell to claim a spot in the "upper 50%" of our list. The very fact that such aspirations exist speaks volumes about the abyss this game has plunged us into.
In the end, this game left me questioning not only my gaming choices but also the very nature of reality. It's akin to the paranoia one feels when inspecting suspiciously shaped Halloween candy wrappers for razor blades, all while unknowingly angering a mafia boss concealed within, a boss who guards his hidden stash of malevolence. Club Penguin: Game Day! is a black hole of gaming, an experience best avoided unless you have a masochistic desire to explore the darkest recesses of digital torment.
Score: 1/10
From the moment this wretched title infects your beloved Wii or Wii U console, you'll find yourself contemplating drastic measures. Burying your gaming systems and sending their remains hurtling into the abyss of an asteroid belt might seem like the only recourse to cleanse your digital soul of the horrors within.
The nightmares of this cursed game haunt my every waking moment. I still shudder at the recollection of that abominable snowball minigame, where a skunk carcass served as the main antagonist. It's as if the game designers were in a contest to see who could create the most absurd and nightmarish scenario.
As the madness unfolded, I made it my solemn mission to subject myself to a relentless barrage of bad video games, all in the hope that Club Penguin: Game Day! might ascend from the depths of gaming hell to claim a spot in the "upper 50%" of our list. The very fact that such aspirations exist speaks volumes about the abyss this game has plunged us into.
In the end, this game left me questioning not only my gaming choices but also the very nature of reality. It's akin to the paranoia one feels when inspecting suspiciously shaped Halloween candy wrappers for razor blades, all while unknowingly angering a mafia boss concealed within, a boss who guards his hidden stash of malevolence. Club Penguin: Game Day! is a black hole of gaming, an experience best avoided unless you have a masochistic desire to explore the darkest recesses of digital torment.
Score: 1/10
8
I can't believe THIS GUY's the manager here. Seriously, I'd like to have a word with the person who thought M&M's Adventure was a good idea. This game is an absolute trainwreck from start to finish. If you've ever wondered what it's like to play a game that seems like it actively despises its players, this is it.
I'll box you in ya ears! That's how I felt about the gameplay. It's clunky, unresponsive, and more frustrating than a Rubik's Cube with missing pieces. The controls are as unreliable as a broken compass in a dark forest. You'll be pulling your hair out, trying to get your M&M character to do anything remotely sensible.
And don't even get me started on the sound design. It's like they hired a tone-deaf walrus to compose the music. The repetitive, grating tunes will haunt your nightmares for weeks. I mean, it's like they were trying to create a soundtrack that could induce madness.
Nanana boo b-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! That's what you'll be hearing in your head as you try to make sense of this game's nonsensical design. It's like a bad acid trip in video game form. The glitches and bugs are so prevalent that you'll wonder if the developers were trying to make a statement about the futility of life.
GETOUTOFMYHEADGETOUTOFMYHEADGETOUTOFMYHEADGETOUTOFMYHEADGETOUTOFMYHEADGETOUTOFMYHEADGETOUTOFMYHEADGETOUTOFMYHEADGETOUTOFMYHEADGETOUTOFMYHEADGETOUTOFMYHEADGETOUTOFMYHEAD. Yes, please, just get out of my head, M&M's Adventure. I played this so you don't have to. Save your sanity and your taste for chocolate.
Leave me alone you Red M&M... because this game is a menace, and it's a mystery how it ever saw the light of day. If I could give it a lower score, I would. Consider my M&M's officially boycotted. Skittles for life!
Score: 1/10
I'll box you in ya ears! That's how I felt about the gameplay. It's clunky, unresponsive, and more frustrating than a Rubik's Cube with missing pieces. The controls are as unreliable as a broken compass in a dark forest. You'll be pulling your hair out, trying to get your M&M character to do anything remotely sensible.
And don't even get me started on the sound design. It's like they hired a tone-deaf walrus to compose the music. The repetitive, grating tunes will haunt your nightmares for weeks. I mean, it's like they were trying to create a soundtrack that could induce madness.
Nanana boo b-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! That's what you'll be hearing in your head as you try to make sense of this game's nonsensical design. It's like a bad acid trip in video game form. The glitches and bugs are so prevalent that you'll wonder if the developers were trying to make a statement about the futility of life.
GETOUTOFMYHEADGETOUTOFMYHEADGETOUTOFMYHEADGETOUTOFMYHEADGETOUTOFMYHEADGETOUTOFMYHEADGETOUTOFMYHEADGETOUTOFMYHEADGETOUTOFMYHEADGETOUTOFMYHEADGETOUTOFMYHEADGETOUTOFMYHEAD. Yes, please, just get out of my head, M&M's Adventure. I played this so you don't have to. Save your sanity and your taste for chocolate.
Leave me alone you Red M&M... because this game is a menace, and it's a mystery how it ever saw the light of day. If I could give it a lower score, I would. Consider my M&M's officially boycotted. Skittles for life!
Score: 1/10
7
This freaking game, man. M&M's Kart Racing is a dumpster fire on wheels, or rather, chocolate candies with wheels. I can't decide if the developers were on an acid trip or just had a thing for unsettling mascots. The only thing sharper than the turns in this game is the desire to put razor blades in those annoying M&M's. And don't get me started on encountering a life-sized Red M&M in a store – that's nightmare fuel right there. I'd rather eat a bag of the real candies than endure another lap in this digital hellscape. A solid 1/10 for the sheer audacity of this fever dream on wheels.
6
Bubsy 3D, a fever dream I might have played or watched, the lines blur. Was it a nightmare or just a fleeting hallucination? Tank controls in a 3D platformer, untextured platforms, and a soundtrack that descends into horror? It's as if the developers were playing a prank on gamers. Madman Mackola, if you had a hand in this, you've got some explaining to do. Or perhaps, it's best left buried in the annals of gaming history. 1/10 for the haunting memories that may or may not be real.
5
Not scary, didn't shiver. Your attempt at horror is so feeble, I wish it had just flown over my head and you had given up on trying to scare me. Frankly, this is a pitiful effort at creating a sense of dread. Not a shiver, not a tremble, not even the faintest tingle down my spine. Science says fear triggers a fight-or-flight response, but I didn't even feel a flicker of adrenaline. 0/10, this horror is so weak, I can't fathom how anyone allowed you to create something remotely scary. The mental gymnastics you must have done to conjure up this horror could power a small village. Find a better story and learn how to build suspense; read a book. I'm not saying this to mock you; I genuinely mean it when I say this is a woeful attempt at horror. You've single-handedly butchered the concept of fear and every chilling tale in existence. I'm so disheartened that society has collectively failed to teach you how to induce fear. Honestly, even if I poured all my energy into trying to be scared by
4
Oh, the tumultuous tale of Garten of Banban, a game that not only earned the disdain of players but managed to create a digital racist entity that rivals anything seen in the last 78 years. The developers, bullied off Twitter, might have sought refuge from the justified criticism. This game is not just a bad gaming experience; it's a societal misstep, an unintentional harbinger of a virtual racist apocalypse. Let's just say, if the gaming industry had a Hall of Shame, Garten of Banban would be an inaugural inductee.
Garten of Banban transcends traditional scoring; it's a gaming abomination that defies numerical evaluation. Consider it a cautionary tale rather than a scored review.
Score: Scale not low enough, game defies numerical evaluation
Garten of Banban transcends traditional scoring; it's a gaming abomination that defies numerical evaluation. Consider it a cautionary tale rather than a scored review.
Score: Scale not low enough, game defies numerical evaluation
3
Counter-Strike 2, hailed as the worst game of all time by the illustrious Enterprise, takes mediocrity to new heights. This masterpiece of disaster manages to fumble on every conceivable aspect of game design, from graphics that might as well be stick figures to gameplay that's less engaging than watching paint dry. It's an achievement, really, to be the unanimous choice for the bottom of the gaming barrel. Enterprise calling this game "The worst game of all time" perfectly captures the essence of this colossal failure, earning it a 0/10, not because it deserves a zero, but because no number is low enough.
2
Let me tell you, M&M's Beach Party was a disappointment of epic proportions. I was lured in by the promise of beach fun, but what I got was a virtual wasteland devoid of any real excitement. The skee ball mini-game, while passable, couldn't save this sinking ship. And don't even get me started on the volleyball mode – it's an absolute disaster. Save yourself the trouble and steer clear of this beach party. I wouldn't touch it with a ten-foot pole.
Honestly, this game doesn't even deserve a score. It's a total disaster.
Honestly, this game doesn't even deserve a score. It's a total disaster.
1