Herodotus
Bond controls like a tank in a blizzard, meaning attempts at fluid motion will often get you murdered very quickly. I do appreciate the attempt to shake off GoldenEye's influence by going third person, though. It works in Bond's favour a few games later.
Better than the PS1 version, but doesn't seem to emulate anywhere near as well. As a sequel to GoldenEye on the N64, it's not as entertaining nor as long-lasting.
Clunky controls, pretty dated graphics even for 2000 and a stealth section that made me visibly angry.
2006
Blood Money is set mostly in America, forgoing the prior games' globetrotting murder marathon for a smaller scale plot involving a rival agency to the ICA. Each level is so memorable to me, to the point I'm going to rate them individually RIGHT NOW.
Death of a Salesman - a crumbling theme park and 2006's best racial politics are the highlights of this linear tutorial level that still lets you get Silent Assassin if you're good enough. 6/10
A Vintage Year - 47 attends a wine tasting party to bump off two Cartel guys, one of whom just loves to play the cello. 7/10
Curtains Down - set in an opera house in Paris, being able to sabotage the play by replacing a prop gun with a real gun is fantastic, as is the concept of dropping a massive chandelier on the second target when he runs to help his dear friend. 8/10
Flatline - ruin rehab for three mobsters, and then wait for an eternity as an NPC is transported to the mission's end point. 6/10
A New Life - enjoy the wonders of suburbia by dressing as a clown and shanking security guards with hedge trimmers, or make friends with the local feds by giving them donuts. "Full disclosure? We're actually FBI." 8/10
The Murder of Crows - cause havoc at a Mardi Gras parade by hunting down three assassins dressed as emo Big Bird, before stealing diamonds and getting down on the dance floor. 8/10
You Better Watch Out - succumb to carnal temptations and get stabbed to death for it while dressed as Santa; or shoot a guy through a jacuzzi and ruin Christmas for everyone. Give a dog a sausage to make it go to sleep! 10/10
Death on the Mississippi - dismantle a local gang of extremely muscular men and their almost offensively gay boat captain; toss men and women overboard with reckless abandon! 8/10
Till Death Do Us Part - 47 enjoys a spot of country dancing before forceably divorcing a newly married couple, before exercising his right to openly carry a pistol for the purpose of self defence. 7/10
A House of Cards - stop a white supremacist and his scientist friend from meeting with a sheikh, while waiting six real world minutes for them to arrive! 9/10
A Dance With the Devil - attend two WILDLY different parties in one night to stop weapons smugglers and assassins who challenge you to a shootout in the world's most soundproofed concrete storage room, while also discovering that Allen needs to add details. 10/10
Amendment XXV - Mr 47 Goes to Washington to PREVENT an assassination by assassinating an assassin. Also, shit goes down in the Oval Office and you can get a tourist yelled at for carrying a pistol in her suitcase. 9/10
Requiem - put the fun in funeral. 8/10
Death of a Salesman - a crumbling theme park and 2006's best racial politics are the highlights of this linear tutorial level that still lets you get Silent Assassin if you're good enough. 6/10
A Vintage Year - 47 attends a wine tasting party to bump off two Cartel guys, one of whom just loves to play the cello. 7/10
Curtains Down - set in an opera house in Paris, being able to sabotage the play by replacing a prop gun with a real gun is fantastic, as is the concept of dropping a massive chandelier on the second target when he runs to help his dear friend. 8/10
Flatline - ruin rehab for three mobsters, and then wait for an eternity as an NPC is transported to the mission's end point. 6/10
A New Life - enjoy the wonders of suburbia by dressing as a clown and shanking security guards with hedge trimmers, or make friends with the local feds by giving them donuts. "Full disclosure? We're actually FBI." 8/10
The Murder of Crows - cause havoc at a Mardi Gras parade by hunting down three assassins dressed as emo Big Bird, before stealing diamonds and getting down on the dance floor. 8/10
You Better Watch Out - succumb to carnal temptations and get stabbed to death for it while dressed as Santa; or shoot a guy through a jacuzzi and ruin Christmas for everyone. Give a dog a sausage to make it go to sleep! 10/10
Death on the Mississippi - dismantle a local gang of extremely muscular men and their almost offensively gay boat captain; toss men and women overboard with reckless abandon! 8/10
Till Death Do Us Part - 47 enjoys a spot of country dancing before forceably divorcing a newly married couple, before exercising his right to openly carry a pistol for the purpose of self defence. 7/10
A House of Cards - stop a white supremacist and his scientist friend from meeting with a sheikh, while waiting six real world minutes for them to arrive! 9/10
A Dance With the Devil - attend two WILDLY different parties in one night to stop weapons smugglers and assassins who challenge you to a shootout in the world's most soundproofed concrete storage room, while also discovering that Allen needs to add details. 10/10
Amendment XXV - Mr 47 Goes to Washington to PREVENT an assassination by assassinating an assassin. Also, shit goes down in the Oval Office and you can get a tourist yelled at for carrying a pistol in her suitcase. 9/10
Requiem - put the fun in funeral. 8/10
2004
Definitely the eeriest Hitman, representative of 47's dying (but not really) mind. That TV introduction with the pistol demonstration scared the SHIT out of me back in 2004, and still makes me a bit uneasy today. Contracts does not relent with its grimdark setting; every mission is either set at night or in the rain, the targets are usually complete scumbags, and the opportunities for killing are pretty grisly.
The AI in this game taught me to be incredibly paranoid of everyone in real life, because they might try to kill me if I walk too quickly.
2000
This entire plot happened to a friend of mine
2022
Terrible translation of the game to VR. Makes Fallout 4 VR look like a native Oculus title.
2015
Fallout 4 is quite underwhelming by itself - I finished a whole playthrough in 2015 on PS4 and when it was over I had absolutely no interest in going back...
But then there's something about it. Something oddly addictive. I don't know what it is, but I can never stay away from it for long - and with mods on PC I've extended that playtime tenfold.
But then there's something about it. Something oddly addictive. I don't know what it is, but I can never stay away from it for long - and with mods on PC I've extended that playtime tenfold.
Alright Todd, I'll buy it again - but this is the last time, okay?
2017
MatPat, the game
Am I crazy or is this actually worse than the original?
It was pretty wild to consider this the definitive ending, especially now that FNAF lore has devolved into robot children, digital virus ghost men that actually isn't a ghost it's just a funny robot, and split-personality murderess moonlighting as security.
I was dead set against this at first, but honestly for a free-to-play battle royale game, it was pretty good. Absolutely infested with hackers, though.
Jon Moxley blades every time the word "fun" is used to describe this game in lieu of any other positive qualifiers. Should've been better, because consoles need a wrestling series that isn't 2K. Competition should breed innovation - but I don't think this will.