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jesus christ 80s gamers had their porn rough

is this the white boy goated with the sauce? or is this sauce goated with the white boy? to understand you must reach a higher level of awareness and see the truth for all its nothingness. the white boy is meaningless. his drip and sauce, material things. you must embrace the one fact that you know; what is in your spirit is what you must believe in, lest you give into oblivion in hopes of becoming something greater. you know what white boy is goated with the sauce in your heart. now take responsibility for the actions done upon thee and see it through. watch that white boy twerk it up sexual style. that, i daresay, is the only thing left for us.

she gore me call that a screaming show

I love you Mr Gore Screaming Show

Ty Gore Screaming Show-sama, you were the best buddy in the world

SPIN SPINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN

i miss when i was barely conscious and i would stare at my leapfrog open jawed not having to worry about the political climate of the world at the moment

This review contains spoilers

[Initial commentary before playing the game]
Huge Neco Arc fan excited to play Tsukihime for the first time

[The actual opinionated part of the review, played Hisui, Arcueid, Ciel and half through Kohaku's route before dropping it, might pick it up again eventually but don't feel the need to.]

So let's talk about Tsukihime
Kinoko Nasu's works are the type of media I always made sure to stay away from back when they were at the height of their popularity. When I took a look at a few clips of Ufotable's anime adaptations, the painfully unfunny shitposts of Astolfo and the overall practices of gacha games made me wary of Fate and Tsukihime for the longest time, perhaps just saying "It looked cringe" was an easy way to deflect any actual criticism I could dish out for a franchise I never touched.

Well lo and behold, the time has come to check out typemoon's humble beginnings back when they didn't have a % on Japan's GDP and the concept of budget titles was a thing for them. Perhaps expectations were too high on my end, but I can't help but feel that expectations were too low for the VN mark at the early 2000s. I'll be the first one to admit that I am not really that much of a fan of the genre, I like a few of them and I appreciate the media format, but I feel like people severely overrate certain pieces of fiction due to their niche status or personal attachment, which is why most VN fans pick that one title to call the apex of the medium while not playing other things so they can feel pompous when they call it mid or a snoozefest.

Tsukihime has a lot of positive and negative elements which I find that happen in common with a lot of other VNs, which combined with my overall gripes with the writing makes me feel like it's the less than the sum of it's parts.

The OST and the art style are nothing worth noting, really. Not only because the main bulk is in the writing, but because really, they could only fit so much inside of a floppy disk. While the 10 tracks the game provides are fine enough on their own, they do start to get grading by the 15 hour mark. Being the first title of a franchise I can't be too harsh on them, but it does work against it.

The art style looks like your average 'how to draw anime' picture books you'd find in comic stores at the time, this sort of caramelldansen Key-Era of anime and visual novels is not something I am particularly fond of despite being a 2000s kid, so I just find it average looking for most of the time, while the CGs have some interesting compositions, I found myself wishing that perhaps more illustrations could be better used to show some more key aspects instead of relying on amateur writing, but we'll get to that when we get to that. I do find it funny that Arcueid is described by Shiki to be so hot and alluring he almost cums in his pants when she passes by him, but her portraits in game don't do nearly as much justice to her to put it lightly.

I do like how choice heavy and gamey the routes really are, despite plenty of them just being fluff that pretty obviously dictates where your route will be headed to, the fact that there really are two completely different plotlines that overall work despite feeling samey in some regards that manage to connect with each isolated instance without feeling forced is indeed a novel (heh) concept that was well executed, even if Ms. Tsukihime herself isn't present in half the routes being the girl on the cover, it shows that the game has plenty to offer aside from it's main attraction.

With all that said, after finishing the Arcueid route I found myself with a heavily flawed narrative overall, that was still very earnest in it's tone despite several hiccups from an amateur writing which lacked the assets and the space to properly convey the emotions he meant with his work (I.E The chair)

Part of me wishes the game only covered the Arcueid route, especially seeing how hard Tsukihime doubled down on it's downright vile portray of sexuality, a very juvenile, twillight-esque portray of romance that consists of which 'hot' girl will kill itself over the doormat that is Tohno Shiki, and how many times Nasu can write the same scene of Shiki going insane with the lack of filter the average VN writer has in it scenes where every minute detail of the character's actions is described during their daily activities watching Spongebob and Scooby-Dooby-Doo to add to their story.

Perhaps I would have a higher appreciation of Tsukihime if it was either a full blown eroge or just a regular adventure of ghostbusting loredump fiestas without mixing both aspects into one. Take Nero Chaos, for instance. an enemy that imposing hyped up to ridiculous degree that didn't even get a CG for himself since he was replaced by the more boring, less interesting villain that is Roa. Even if the fighting scenes are lacking in the writing department, a few CGs would greatly mitigate that fact. The main key scene that starts Arcueid and Shiki's development is where he suddenly cuts her up in little square pieces, also no visual emphasis on that.

Oh, of course! My bad, I forgot it had to make way for well over half the CGs of a succubus that transforms into every character so Shiki can imagine that he had sex with all the girls (his sister included) in a throwaway scene. Given how there was another writer in charge of writing this I won't comment on the fact that these sex scenes are narrated with the enthusiasm of a woman who bought a lingerie two sizes smaller than her size to resuscitate the sex life of a broken marriage 10 years without coitus, but the amount of focus it is given to the story is impossible to ignore, especially with the discusting implications that Arcueid pretty much asked to be raped on her route with her tingly eyes of sex perception, or the pornhub-tier "Stepbro I'm stuck in the washing machine oopsie doopsie poopsie!" moment that is Hisui explaining that dicksucking is how her power is more effective at healing people's body conditions, it's a porn feature that doesn't add to the experience, but subtracts.

Tsukihime wants to have it's cake and eat it to, because Kohaku's story of her abuse is genuinely heartbreaking, one of the better aspects of the Far side route, might I add. But to accept the emotional impact of that story beat would also mean that I would let it slide all the bullshit I mentioned previously, and I'm not sure if the story is fully decided on where the sex scenes should be something vile to show the deterioration of Shiki's sanity, or something edgy and hot for me to jerk my little ding dong to.

Despite having all these gripes, I wouldn't say I hated Tsukihime overall. Like I said previously, it represents a different era and a degree of amateur writing that would never turn into a cult classic by today's standards. I am not calling myself a fan just yet, but the characters, the atmosphere and the feel of it all still made me curious to keep going on to read TsukiPlus, Kagetsu Tohya and what have you, and making me interested on the lore of your series is already a half step into progress. Who knows? Perhaps when the remake of all the routes fully come out, I'll give the story a second chance. It's rare when authors admit their faults and go on to rework stories and aspects of it that have aged poorly, and given how it's been approved by old and new audiences alike, I feel comfort in knowing that not all remakes and remasters come from pure industrial greed, but a desire to artistically improve.

Still not reading Fate, though.

Whenever you encounter someone that genuinely seems to like this game, be sure to ask them how many levels they’ve beaten. 9 times out of 10 they’ll respond with “oh I haven’t gotten past the Toxic Caves level but it was fun!”

Works like a charm

I miss being 12 years old and scrolling tumblr until 4am every hot summer night. I miss playing with one earbud out so I could hurriedly minimize the window every time I thought I heard my family approaching. I miss trying to figure out how to set my system locale to JP for the first time. I miss Clear. Everything was simpler back then.

This review contains spoilers

regardless of what ryukishi wants you to believe, forgetting about your middle school crush is not a grave sin

Cathode Ray Tube Amusement Device was a cornerstone in gaming like no other in its release decade.

Its masterful juggling between a gripping narrative that explores deep, psychological themes like the heart of darkness, or where does malice and war come from and the effects they can have on a nation, and a surprisingly deep gameplay that thrives in the philosophy of "easy to learn, hard to master" while also coming full circle with core mechanics that tie themselves to the central themes of the story is something that just hadn't been done up until that point.

It's easy to see how the game industry ballooned like it did thanks to this atemporal gem.

Simply a must play for anyone with even the slightest interest in this hobby.