4 reviews liked by SpectR0nn


Every fibre of my being wanted to love this, and in many ways, I do. However, I often felt weary of some aspects of the game. Some of the zones you travel to are very cumbersome, making it a pain to complete the numerous and dull side activities. That being said, the best parts were the linear parts that follow the main story, which hit unbelievably hard. The worst part of the whole thing is that it feels like no minigame idea was turned down. Some of which are mandatory, and some have weapons behind them. If you are a completionist like me, you'll have a rough time seeing everything the game offers.

I'm starting to suspect this might not be the final fantasy

Rebirth and Remake are opposites in many ways. Remake was a linear, narrative-focused game with cramped and narrow environments tunneling you toward specific objectives and story beats. Rebirth is an open, content-packed game with expansive areas that allow for endless hours of exploration. Many players are going to struggle to adjust to this new style of game especially if they expect a similar experience from Rebirth as they had with Remake. I too had to adjust to this new style. Remake created such a compelling gameplay loop that felt tight and rich in plot beats. Very rarely did you spend much time away from the main plot save for a few mediocre side activities or the occasional boss battle with one of Chadley’s many simulations. Rebirth on the other hand presents you with so many side activities that it can be a shock to the system. I did not fully adjust to the flow of Rebirth until I had already completely cleared the first major area. Once I did adjust, once it all became second-nature and I fully embraced what Rebirth had to offer, I found a game that, after 90 hours, all I wanted to do was play it all over again.

Rebirth tackles its open-world in a way that I was not sure about at first. It is very much a check-list style with massive open zones that have points of interest scattered around for you to go to and complete. It is most compared to a Ubisoft-style open-world and I believe that comparison is mostly apt here. In recent years I have shifted to preferring the open-world styles of a Breath of the Wild or an Elden Ring. Big open worlds with minimal markers. Games where you just get placed in a beautiful world and can go anywhere at any time and discover things without knowing what is coming up next. The adjustment from those kinds of open-worlds to this was certainly an obstacle, but it was one I broke through. By the time I began exploring and completing objectives in the second major open-area, it was all really beginning to click.

The actual actions you’re taking in the open-world can range from a simple 10 second button-press QTE to battles with special mini-boss fiends. This is to say that some are definitely more involved than others and not all objectives are made the same. However, they all serve the purpose of fleshing the world out and serving as an excuse to engage and explore these beautiful landscapes. Each open area also has a hub-town that you can explore, rest, gather items, equipment, and side quests to complete. The side quests are really where the game’s side content is at its best. These side quests can have varied purposes from deepening the lore of the world, giving more characterization to your companions, or even as a long joke. All are well-worth doing even for players who are not vibing with the open-world aspect of the game. They add so much flavor and depth that would otherwise be missed out on.

The activities just mentioned already would be enough to make Rebirth a much more expansive game than Remake. However, Rebirth decides it is not done yet as they introduce the player to literally dozens of mini-games to complete throughout your journey. Some are required for minor moments, others are tied to specific side quests, but most are completely optional. This will be the aspect that divides the playerbase the most. Players looking for that tight, streamlined, focused experience of Remake will likely not find much to love about the mini-games packed into Rebirth. Those who buy-into the world and enjoy engaging with a wide variety of content even if it deviates from the core gameplay will find a treasure trove of things to do. Admittedly, the mini-games can vary in quality. Some are fully fleshed out experiences all to themselves such as the in-universe card game Queen’s Blood. Most are fairly good to just OK. I only found a handful that I actively disliked which is impressive given the sheer size and quantity that are present.

A big problem some players will end up facing if they find themselves feeling negative about the mini-games will stem, at least in part, from the fact that the combat of Rebirth is so engaging. Remake was a game that already had on of my top 3 favorite combat systems of all time. Rebirth took that system and just expanded on it and easily surpassed the original. Every character is unique, serves a specific niche, has similar levels of complexity, and are a blast to learn and play. With this many characters to play as--6 in total for your main party--it can be easy for some to get lost in the shuffle as you tunnel into one party set up that you find comfortable. Rebirth solves this by having multiple story moments when the party composition shifts and changes as characters temporarily leave the party, go on a little mini-adventure, or whatever other narrative reason they have for shifting party composition. This can easily feel forced and frustrating but Rebirth makes it feel very natural. Never once did my party composition change and I was unsatisfied or outright annoyed by it.

The story is going to be one of the biggest draws to this game. Remake created a world, characters, and narrative that compelled old and new fans alike while throwing some major curve-balls at the end that confused and divided players. Rebirth maintains this trajectory for most of the game. The main story drip-feeds information slowly, creating two or three questions for every answer it might provide. In-between these moments of intrigue are emotional character moments, hilarious misadventures, and thrilling conflicts. The quality of the main story is every bit as compelling, excellently written, and engaging as Remake, if not moreso.

The adventure is certainly a lot wackier than Remake though. Remake had its moments of fun and games but generally maintained that dreary atmosphere of Midgar. Rebirth cranks the goof to another level. Despite how absurd some of the situations are that our characters find themselves in, it still maintains a level of writing quality that never veers too far into the cheesy quality you might associate with something like Kingdom Hearts (this is no shade to Kingdom Hearts either, it’s literally my favorite game series ever). This may turn off players who prefer a more serious, darker atmosphere. I found it incredibly endearing and made me fall deeper in love with this cast of misfit characters even more-so than I had before.
If Remake was controversial for its perplexing ending, then Rebirth will be even moreso. They do not shy away from the ideas they proposed in Remake, instead they double down. They attempt to create a thought-provoking ending that doesn’t give all of the answers. After all, there is an entire third game still to come. Most will be bewildered by it and that is to be expected. If endings that you have to sit with, digest, really dig into and theorize about are your style, then Rebirth will provide. If you prefer a story with a more definitive ending then Rebirth’s ending may not sit well with you. Either way, even during bouts of shock, confusion, and a million neurons firing in all directions in my brain as different revelations flashed before my eyes, the emotional resonance that the ending of this game attempts to give still came through, and it came through hard. Rebirth does not pull punches when it tries to deliver emotional moments and all of them hit like freight trains.

Final Fantasy VII: Rebirth is a lot. It’s a content-rich adventure that tries to simultaneously honor the original title from the late-90s, re-create the magic of its immediate predecessor, and become its own thing entirely. Which combination of things you do or don’t think work out will vary wildly based on your expectations, taste, and willingness to buy-in to all that Rebirth attempts to do.

I bought in, I embraced fully each aspect that Rebirth tried to accomplish. What I got in return was one of the best gaming experiences of my lifetime. What I got was a game that, despite its girth, will be a part of my library to return to forever. I received a magical experience that cascaded me with emotions that I had not felt since 2005 when I played Kingdom Hearts II for the first time. Little did I know it would become my all-time favorite game ever. Final Fantasy VII: Rebirth is not Kingdom Hearts II, but it is the first game I have played since that game to give me a similar type of feeling while playing. Awe, excitement, thrill, joy, sadness, despair, bewilderment, intrigue, exhilaration, all of these emotions and more combine to create two distinct experiences that will stick with me forever. Final Fantasy VII: Rebirth reignited a feeling in me that I did not think would resurface again. It easily has become one of my favorite games of all-time.

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Hotel Mario. The Gameplay is extremely Subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the button options will go over a typical player's head. There's also Mario's nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation - his personal philosophy draws heavily from Nintendo Sex Hotels, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of the gameplay, to realize that they're not just fun- they say something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike Hotel Mario truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn't appreciate, for instance, the humour in Luigi's existencial catchphrase "I hope she made lots spaghett" which itself is a cryptic reference to, once again, Nintendo sex hotels. I'm smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as the genius of the controls unfolds itself on their Video game console. What fools... how I pity them. 😂 And yes by the way, I DO have a Hotel Mario tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It's for the ladies' eyes only- And even they have to demonstrate that they're within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand.