SwitSwat
BACKER
1993
Since I'm no longer a gamer and my opinions mean nothing anymore (not that they ever did), I'm just going to come out and say it: Kirby's Adventure is one of the worst experiences I have had playing a video game to completion.
I first finished Kirby's Dreamland about 8 years ago. It was ridiculously short, and that was mainly its issue. I still had a decent time with it, but its length and simplicity made for a mediocre game at best. Kirby's Adventure's existence honestly baffles me. This came out over 2 years after the Super Famicom had already launched. They had the chance to innovate greatly on the original, which was severely limited by the hardware it was released on, but they basically did a repeat of that with MUCH WORSE results.
This game introduced the series staple of copying enemy abilities by eating them. Combining two allows you to make a new "power combo." I think I only ever did this once because playing this game is a constant struggle. The controls are atrocious, which are made worse by the severe slowdown throughout the entire game. Most of the time I took a hit in this game is because I tried inhaling or attacking an enemy and the controls would just fail me. Either nothing happens, or I start floating and become vulnerable. Not being able to inhale enemies while floating is such an annoying mechanic because of how slow you are. Always getting hit meant I could never hold onto one ability for long to have much fun, let alone combine two. Boss fights were especially grueling, and by the time I got to Level 7, I just couldn't be bothered anymore with the mini boss gauntlet. I had to use the Game Genie infinite energy cheat so I can finally get it over with.
Level 7-6 was a breath of fresh air because, like the Gameboy original, it's in black and white (minus Kirby himself). You know why I liked that level? Because it didn't run at 10 FPS. Seriously, if they had just made the whole game black and white, I'm sure I would have had a much better time. The slowdown is just that bad. The final boss was also kinda cool (well, Phase 1 at least). It becomes a side scrolling shooter of sorts, and not having to control Kirby with the floating controls was a brief, but much appreciated blessing. And then Phase 2 starts. Phase 2 sucks. The whole game sucks. And believe me, I feel bad saying that. There's definitely a lot of charm to this game and the series in general. It's definitely one of the best-looking games on the NES, but that doesn't mean much when I barely get any enjoyment out of it.
I first finished Kirby's Dreamland about 8 years ago. It was ridiculously short, and that was mainly its issue. I still had a decent time with it, but its length and simplicity made for a mediocre game at best. Kirby's Adventure's existence honestly baffles me. This came out over 2 years after the Super Famicom had already launched. They had the chance to innovate greatly on the original, which was severely limited by the hardware it was released on, but they basically did a repeat of that with MUCH WORSE results.
This game introduced the series staple of copying enemy abilities by eating them. Combining two allows you to make a new "power combo." I think I only ever did this once because playing this game is a constant struggle. The controls are atrocious, which are made worse by the severe slowdown throughout the entire game. Most of the time I took a hit in this game is because I tried inhaling or attacking an enemy and the controls would just fail me. Either nothing happens, or I start floating and become vulnerable. Not being able to inhale enemies while floating is such an annoying mechanic because of how slow you are. Always getting hit meant I could never hold onto one ability for long to have much fun, let alone combine two. Boss fights were especially grueling, and by the time I got to Level 7, I just couldn't be bothered anymore with the mini boss gauntlet. I had to use the Game Genie infinite energy cheat so I can finally get it over with.
Level 7-6 was a breath of fresh air because, like the Gameboy original, it's in black and white (minus Kirby himself). You know why I liked that level? Because it didn't run at 10 FPS. Seriously, if they had just made the whole game black and white, I'm sure I would have had a much better time. The slowdown is just that bad. The final boss was also kinda cool (well, Phase 1 at least). It becomes a side scrolling shooter of sorts, and not having to control Kirby with the floating controls was a brief, but much appreciated blessing. And then Phase 2 starts. Phase 2 sucks. The whole game sucks. And believe me, I feel bad saying that. There's definitely a lot of charm to this game and the series in general. It's definitely one of the best-looking games on the NES, but that doesn't mean much when I barely get any enjoyment out of it.
2016
When I first got a PS4, I was mainly looking forward to two games: Final Fantasy XV and Type-0. Since this is a XV review, I won’t talk about the latter here, but while the next mainline entry was still nearly 2 years away from release, I was still beyond hyped. Now, back then, I don’t think I was all that aware of the long and troubled development cycle that this game had gone through and how it originally started life as a XIII spin-off. We’ll probably never know how much better the game could have been had the original vision come to fruition, but I digress. This game was the first mainline title in the series to be released after I became a fan (if you don’t count A Realm Reborn). Games like FFVI and VII were pivotal in cementing my love for JRPGs as a whole (despite never having finished them at the time). This new title was shaping up to be an incredible game. An open-world, action-oriented Final Fantasy in a more modern/semi-realistic setting seemed unreal to a younger, teenage me. I pre-ordered the Deluxe Edition. My body and my mind were so ready. I popped that sucker in to my PS4 aaaaaand…
No, despite what you are thinking, I actually did enjoy it from the get-go. In fact, I was enthralled. But this was less a sign of the game’s quality and me just being starstruck by the visuals and the fact that the game was real. I was driving a car in a Final Fantasy game. It cannot get any cooler than that. It was around Chapter 6 however, that I paused the game for several months. Not because I got bored, mind you, but this was just a nasty habit I’ve always had where I just stop playing for long periods of time for seemingly no reason. Came back and beat another couple of chapters and then I paused again… for almost 6 years.
I didn’t come back and finish this game until recently, but hindsight is 20/20, and the years I left this game in the backlog got me thinking of just how much wasted potential this game had, and these thoughts were further cemented once I actually finished it. Sure, the game is fun, but each new mainline FF is worthy of a celebration. A series that has been as monumental and long-lasting as this getting a new game is always worthy of discussion and much anticipation, and while the series had certainly been on a downward spiral for many years to many, at least a game like XIII felt complete. XV is not. It’s a mishmash of interesting ideas with flawed execution. The combat is simple, and yet somehow a bit infuriating in how precise dodging has to be for certain bosses and encounters. Its simplicity may also be a contention for bad gameplay, but I still found it enjoyable enough, personally. The open world is ambitious, but feels incredibly barren, with little to do outside of often middling sidequests. It doesn’t help that driving is a semi-automatic affair in the world’s slowest convertible (though future upgrades give you more freedom).
And the story… this is where the cracks really show. Countless people have been vocal about how the story is simply unfinished, and I don’t think anyone can argue against that, not even the hardcore defenders of this game. If you want to get the full story, there’s a movie, an anime, a side game, four DLC episodes, and even a novel. Yes, a NOVEL. This game can give the Kingdom Hearts series a run for its money. Granted, if you’re looking for a relatively complete “self-contained” experience, you only need the DLC episodes, but it really didn’t need to be! It’s insane how quickly the story starts to progress after Chapter 9 or so. It feels like they were running out of time or budget and just needed to ship the game out ASAP.
There’s a lot of flaws, that much is obvious, but at the very least, it’s still an endearing game. While I don’t think it’s a great FF game, it’s still good in its own right, and the vibes of going on an adventure with your three best bros are immaculate. It’s the character moments, both large and small, that really define this game and make for a cozy experience. By the end of it all, I felt like I was personally saying goodbye to my best friends. There’s definitely enough heart here to make it worth playing, and whether you’re already a fan of the series or a newbie, I think it helps to set your expectations a bit low, and you may just end up enjoying your time with it.
No, despite what you are thinking, I actually did enjoy it from the get-go. In fact, I was enthralled. But this was less a sign of the game’s quality and me just being starstruck by the visuals and the fact that the game was real. I was driving a car in a Final Fantasy game. It cannot get any cooler than that. It was around Chapter 6 however, that I paused the game for several months. Not because I got bored, mind you, but this was just a nasty habit I’ve always had where I just stop playing for long periods of time for seemingly no reason. Came back and beat another couple of chapters and then I paused again… for almost 6 years.
I didn’t come back and finish this game until recently, but hindsight is 20/20, and the years I left this game in the backlog got me thinking of just how much wasted potential this game had, and these thoughts were further cemented once I actually finished it. Sure, the game is fun, but each new mainline FF is worthy of a celebration. A series that has been as monumental and long-lasting as this getting a new game is always worthy of discussion and much anticipation, and while the series had certainly been on a downward spiral for many years to many, at least a game like XIII felt complete. XV is not. It’s a mishmash of interesting ideas with flawed execution. The combat is simple, and yet somehow a bit infuriating in how precise dodging has to be for certain bosses and encounters. Its simplicity may also be a contention for bad gameplay, but I still found it enjoyable enough, personally. The open world is ambitious, but feels incredibly barren, with little to do outside of often middling sidequests. It doesn’t help that driving is a semi-automatic affair in the world’s slowest convertible (though future upgrades give you more freedom).
And the story… this is where the cracks really show. Countless people have been vocal about how the story is simply unfinished, and I don’t think anyone can argue against that, not even the hardcore defenders of this game. If you want to get the full story, there’s a movie, an anime, a side game, four DLC episodes, and even a novel. Yes, a NOVEL. This game can give the Kingdom Hearts series a run for its money. Granted, if you’re looking for a relatively complete “self-contained” experience, you only need the DLC episodes, but it really didn’t need to be! It’s insane how quickly the story starts to progress after Chapter 9 or so. It feels like they were running out of time or budget and just needed to ship the game out ASAP.
There’s a lot of flaws, that much is obvious, but at the very least, it’s still an endearing game. While I don’t think it’s a great FF game, it’s still good in its own right, and the vibes of going on an adventure with your three best bros are immaculate. It’s the character moments, both large and small, that really define this game and make for a cozy experience. By the end of it all, I felt like I was personally saying goodbye to my best friends. There’s definitely enough heart here to make it worth playing, and whether you’re already a fan of the series or a newbie, I think it helps to set your expectations a bit low, and you may just end up enjoying your time with it.
This review contains spoilers
There's a lot to digest here. It's just unfortunate that the 2nd third of this patch kills the pacing with the meandering around some ARR areas which felt more like busywork, despite knowing it was plot relevant. It doesn't help that we had to fight Titan again. Sure, it was the (Hard) version, but that was already optional content beforehand that I had already completed, so queuing up for it again was kinda whack.
But I digress, the actual meat of this patch is indeed interesting, and with Alisaie finally joining the fray here, it's cause for celebration enough. The return of Yda and Papalymo is also nice, but I'm so paranoid at this point in the story, especially with Urianger working as a double agent, that I'm starting to wonder if either of them are hiding something terrible. Of course, everything seemed to have worked out with Urianger and I'm glad he didn't actually betray us, but man, with this game, you never know.
The Warriors of Darkness had a sort of redemption arc in this one that made me feel some sympathy for them, but as it was with previous patches, there just seems to be a lot of set up for Shadowbringers and it kills me that there's still a whole expansion to go before then. Damn you, Yoshi P!
Oh, and Nero's back? Oh boy...
But I digress, the actual meat of this patch is indeed interesting, and with Alisaie finally joining the fray here, it's cause for celebration enough. The return of Yda and Papalymo is also nice, but I'm so paranoid at this point in the story, especially with Urianger working as a double agent, that I'm starting to wonder if either of them are hiding something terrible. Of course, everything seemed to have worked out with Urianger and I'm glad he didn't actually betray us, but man, with this game, you never know.
The Warriors of Darkness had a sort of redemption arc in this one that made me feel some sympathy for them, but as it was with previous patches, there just seems to be a lot of set up for Shadowbringers and it kills me that there's still a whole expansion to go before then. Damn you, Yoshi P!
Oh, and Nero's back? Oh boy...
2017
Between this and Breath of the Wild, the Nintendo Switch was a disappointing console around launch, as far as first party exclusives go. I know I already upset a lot of people by saying that. But look, I love me some Mario, and Zelda is one of my favorite franchises in gaming. I might end up enjoying BOTW in time, but I haven't been able to play more than 2 hours yet before losing interest. But I'm getting off topic. We can save that for the BOTW review in a year or two, hopefully.
Anyway, Odyssey is a good game. In fact, I'd say it's a great game. There's definitely a lot of creativity oozing here, as I have come to expect from the 3D Mario titles. Beautiful locales, a charming soundtrack, fun boss fights, and the overabundance of cool secrets to discover makes for a very engaging game. But my main problem with Odyssey is just how lacking in purpose it feels with its collectibles.
A game like Galaxy, with its more mission focused structure when it comes to collectibles, makes it feel like you are constantly making progress and overcoming challenges. I don't really feel this way with Odyssey. You have these large, gorgeous, and vibrant kingdoms to explore, which undoubtedly feels good to do so, especially with Mario's varied move set and handling. But with so many moons to collect in the game (836 with post-game content), you will come across quite a lot with little effort. Ironically enough, eventually it will just start to feel like a chore. This is definitely a game that I don't feel compelled to 100% despite still having a lot of fun with. Galaxy on the other hand, I could definitely see myself completing fully.
Call me old-school, but I prefer my platformers to be more linear. Because of this, my favorite parts usually consisted of the special red and gold hat doors (and rockets) that transport you to separate smaller levels that usually only have 1 or 2 moons. And to be honest, most of the ones I came across were fairly simple, but they felt like a nice break from the large-scale scavenger hunt. Odyssey obviously has a formula that works and pleases a lot of people, but it's definitely not the ideal 3D Mario experience I was hoping for.
Anyway, Odyssey is a good game. In fact, I'd say it's a great game. There's definitely a lot of creativity oozing here, as I have come to expect from the 3D Mario titles. Beautiful locales, a charming soundtrack, fun boss fights, and the overabundance of cool secrets to discover makes for a very engaging game. But my main problem with Odyssey is just how lacking in purpose it feels with its collectibles.
A game like Galaxy, with its more mission focused structure when it comes to collectibles, makes it feel like you are constantly making progress and overcoming challenges. I don't really feel this way with Odyssey. You have these large, gorgeous, and vibrant kingdoms to explore, which undoubtedly feels good to do so, especially with Mario's varied move set and handling. But with so many moons to collect in the game (836 with post-game content), you will come across quite a lot with little effort. Ironically enough, eventually it will just start to feel like a chore. This is definitely a game that I don't feel compelled to 100% despite still having a lot of fun with. Galaxy on the other hand, I could definitely see myself completing fully.
Call me old-school, but I prefer my platformers to be more linear. Because of this, my favorite parts usually consisted of the special red and gold hat doors (and rockets) that transport you to separate smaller levels that usually only have 1 or 2 moons. And to be honest, most of the ones I came across were fairly simple, but they felt like a nice break from the large-scale scavenger hunt. Odyssey obviously has a formula that works and pleases a lot of people, but it's definitely not the ideal 3D Mario experience I was hoping for.
A superior sequel in every way. No more annoying slowdown, the level design is a bit more interesting, and the BS difficulty has been greatly toned down for the most part.
Unfortunately, they still forgot to make the game fun. Instead of having a fresh scoop of poop on a cone, you now have a vanilla cone with poop sprinkles. You still wouldn't want to eat it.
Unfortunately, they still forgot to make the game fun. Instead of having a fresh scoop of poop on a cone, you now have a vanilla cone with poop sprinkles. You still wouldn't want to eat it.
This game taught me that I'm a "failure of a person," but it's also the first Touhou game to actually play like one. Even though I still enjoyed the first game, it still felt somewhat awkward, especially going in with foresight on what the series would become. Despite its relative simplicity, Touhou 2 actually feels like a cohesive product, and one which really showcases the potential of the series formula. I'm still a relative newbie when it comes to bullet-hell/danmaku games, I'm still a complete newbie, and some frustrate me to no end, but I was pleasantly surprised by this one, and its relative simplicity probably proved to be a plus for someone like me who's still trying to get into the genre. If this is considered a mediocre Touhou game, then I'm in for a real treat with this franchise.
2012
Burst is technically 2 games in one (Skirting Shadows and Crimson Girls), with both being pretty much identical in terms of gameplay. The first tells the story through the perspective of the girls from the Hanzo National Academy, and the latter from the perspective of the girls from the Hebijo Clandestine's Girls' Academy. It's kind of neat to be able to see the story from opposing perspectives, but really, if you've played through one arc, you've pretty much experienced the other one as well.
As the first couple of games in the series, it's quite a rough start. Gameplay consists of missions which occur in a 2.5D sort of space where you will either be fighting hordes of enemies, or a 1-on-1 battle with another character. Movement is limited, as you will mainly be running either left or right with only some space to move vertically. All throughout these missions, you will just be button mashing 24/7. There's really no strategy involved in most missions besides spamming the Y and X buttons. Yes, there's combos and aerial attacks, but they are about as basic as they can be. Even on the more difficult later missions, there are cheap ways to spam and win as long as you did some really light grinding.
Granted, the simplistic gameplay could have been fine... if it wasn't for the atrocious framerate issues. I couldn't tell you exactly how many frames you'll be getting on average, but it's pretty bad. After a while, you do get kind of used to it, but it does make the game more of a slog than it should be. What kept me going was mainly the characters, as I have come to develop a soft spot for the series as a whole, and I enjoy the silly dialogue and story to a certain extent. Also, as lame as I think the gameplay is, it's still kind of satisfying to beat up these gals. Still, if you must know the story, I recommend playing Burst Re:Newal instead.
As the first couple of games in the series, it's quite a rough start. Gameplay consists of missions which occur in a 2.5D sort of space where you will either be fighting hordes of enemies, or a 1-on-1 battle with another character. Movement is limited, as you will mainly be running either left or right with only some space to move vertically. All throughout these missions, you will just be button mashing 24/7. There's really no strategy involved in most missions besides spamming the Y and X buttons. Yes, there's combos and aerial attacks, but they are about as basic as they can be. Even on the more difficult later missions, there are cheap ways to spam and win as long as you did some really light grinding.
Granted, the simplistic gameplay could have been fine... if it wasn't for the atrocious framerate issues. I couldn't tell you exactly how many frames you'll be getting on average, but it's pretty bad. After a while, you do get kind of used to it, but it does make the game more of a slog than it should be. What kept me going was mainly the characters, as I have come to develop a soft spot for the series as a whole, and I enjoy the silly dialogue and story to a certain extent. Also, as lame as I think the gameplay is, it's still kind of satisfying to beat up these gals. Still, if you must know the story, I recommend playing Burst Re:Newal instead.
This review contains spoilers
Holy based? Speaking of based, can we get a moment of silence for my man Papalymo? His sacrifice solidified him as one of the GOAT's.
It'd be pretty neat if the trend of the x.5 patches being the best ones continue. And sure, I understand why many consider 3.3 to be the best one of the HW patches, but I love how dark the first half of this patch was, and the second half's epic battle between Omega and Shinryu was satisfyingly intense.
The character development for Yda.. er, I mean, Lyse, was also quite nice to hear, with her brief backstory being quite bittersweet. This patch wasn't as smooth of a transition into the next expansion as 2.5 was, but that hardly matters when I was this enthralled. I'm still keeping my expectations somewhat low, seeing as Stormblood is the black sheep of the expansions, but hopefully that works in my favor, because I still can't help but feel excited now that I've gotten this far.
It'd be pretty neat if the trend of the x.5 patches being the best ones continue. And sure, I understand why many consider 3.3 to be the best one of the HW patches, but I love how dark the first half of this patch was, and the second half's epic battle between Omega and Shinryu was satisfyingly intense.
The character development for Yda.. er, I mean, Lyse, was also quite nice to hear, with her brief backstory being quite bittersweet. This patch wasn't as smooth of a transition into the next expansion as 2.5 was, but that hardly matters when I was this enthralled. I'm still keeping my expectations somewhat low, seeing as Stormblood is the black sheep of the expansions, but hopefully that works in my favor, because I still can't help but feel excited now that I've gotten this far.
Imagine Breakout, but the ball kills you if you don't parry it with a button press. I beat the Makai route on Easy with nearly 100 continues mainly because of the final boss. I felt like I was hot shit. But apparently, you have to beat the game without using a single continue for the two possible true endings. I thought people being scared of Touhou players was just a meme. But now I understand completely. Some people really do be out here doing no damage runs on these games at the highest difficulty. Apparently, this is one of the easier games too. I'm terrified of what awaits me with the proper bullet hell games...
1992
I think this is a step down from the previous game, but not by much. Dr. Wily is on his bullshit again, except now he led you to believe it was Protoman doing the dirty deeds, as MM4 teased at the end. But no, it was a fake Protoman this whole time. Wow, what a shocker. I mean, it's nice how the series started developing more of a story with the 3rd classic entry, and even more so with the 4th, but do people really play these games for the plot?
Anyway, you also get a bird now. His name is Beat. Probably cuz he can lay the beatdown on bosses. Frankly, he's kind of OP, especially the final boss. You need to collect all of the letters that spell out MEGAMANV throughout the 8 main stages to unlock him, but they're all pretty easy to spot and collect.
It's a solid game with some great bosses. Some of the weapons are pretty stinky, but that's a given at this point. The second half is a bit exhausting, as usual, but once again, it was actually fun, unlike MM3. Not much to say really, as I'm mainly just cranking out these MM reviews out for the sake of consistency now. Just one more game on the NES. I'm hoping that it ends on a bang... or at least some confetti poppers.
Anyway, you also get a bird now. His name is Beat. Probably cuz he can lay the beatdown on bosses. Frankly, he's kind of OP, especially the final boss. You need to collect all of the letters that spell out MEGAMANV throughout the 8 main stages to unlock him, but they're all pretty easy to spot and collect.
It's a solid game with some great bosses. Some of the weapons are pretty stinky, but that's a given at this point. The second half is a bit exhausting, as usual, but once again, it was actually fun, unlike MM3. Not much to say really, as I'm mainly just cranking out these MM reviews out for the sake of consistency now. Just one more game on the NES. I'm hoping that it ends on a bang... or at least some confetti poppers.
1993
Here I am, at the end of my NES MM journey. I was hoping this game would be a great conclusion to the hexalogy, but sadly, it wasn't. With this being my 2nd least favorite, I still found enough to enjoy here, but nothing really stood out. Yep, it's just more of the same. You get your classic MM gameplay with the ocassional annoying stage antics and boss shenanigans. Also, this time, the story takes a bit of a turn as the mysterious Mr.X informs you that he was the one pulling the strings the whole time and that Dr. Wily was just a pawn... But in a shocking twist that literally everyone saw coming, Mr.X was just Wily in disguise. Honestly, Wily should have retired long ago. This is just embarassing.
One cool update in this game is that Rush powers are no longer tied to a depletable meter that you need to refill. Now, Rush can fuse with Mega Man like armor. You only get 2, one of which lets you smash blocks or enemies, and a jetpack which you can use for a couple of seconds, followed by a negligeable cooldown.
Oh yeah, Beat is in this game again. He got nerfed, though. The letters, or plates as they are called here, that you need to collect to spell out BEAT and unlock him are also harder to obtain here than in the previous game, if you're playing blind, as they are tied to progressing through alternate routes in certain stages. I went out of my way to get them just to realize he got nerfed to the point where he doesn't even attack bosses now. I guess he's there if you wanna breeze through stages, but for the most part, I feel like levels in this game are easy enough as is. Kinda makes me wish he wasn't even on the cover. Thankfully, unlike MM5, the final boss is piss easy. Just keep chucking that Silver Tomahawk at Wily, and you're golden.
One cool update in this game is that Rush powers are no longer tied to a depletable meter that you need to refill. Now, Rush can fuse with Mega Man like armor. You only get 2, one of which lets you smash blocks or enemies, and a jetpack which you can use for a couple of seconds, followed by a negligeable cooldown.
Oh yeah, Beat is in this game again. He got nerfed, though. The letters, or plates as they are called here, that you need to collect to spell out BEAT and unlock him are also harder to obtain here than in the previous game, if you're playing blind, as they are tied to progressing through alternate routes in certain stages. I went out of my way to get them just to realize he got nerfed to the point where he doesn't even attack bosses now. I guess he's there if you wanna breeze through stages, but for the most part, I feel like levels in this game are easy enough as is. Kinda makes me wish he wasn't even on the cover. Thankfully, unlike MM5, the final boss is piss easy. Just keep chucking that Silver Tomahawk at Wily, and you're golden.
This review contains spoilers
As multiple threads continue to be woven, this patch feels like a direct response to my main complaint for the last patch, which was tonal whiplash; a problem which also resulted in a boring first half. This patch is consistently interesting, and granted, I have enjoyed the previous patches, but this is the first one to truly get me excited for Heavensward; more specifically, the narrative highs that said first expansion can possibly provide.
To break away from the prior patches' tradition, we finally get a MSQ dungeon in the form of Snowcloak, and while I don't usually like snow-themed "levels" much, this one was good, especially its boss. But the real highlight was the Shiva trial. The music bro... THE MUSIC!
Anyway, my boiling hatred for Teledji continues, and Ul'dah is honestly so corrupt at this point, that I'm lowkey wishing for a Sodom and Gomorrah style cataclysm on this joint if things don't get better. Raubahn and the Sultana deserve better and I just want to give them the biggest hug; I weep for my two precious friends. I'm eager to see the rammifications of The Sultana's decision to step down as monarch, both in relation to what that means for Ul'dah's government moving forward, and also the general populace's reaction.
To break away from the prior patches' tradition, we finally get a MSQ dungeon in the form of Snowcloak, and while I don't usually like snow-themed "levels" much, this one was good, especially its boss. But the real highlight was the Shiva trial. The music bro... THE MUSIC!
Anyway, my boiling hatred for Teledji continues, and Ul'dah is honestly so corrupt at this point, that I'm lowkey wishing for a Sodom and Gomorrah style cataclysm on this joint if things don't get better. Raubahn and the Sultana deserve better and I just want to give them the biggest hug; I weep for my two precious friends. I'm eager to see the rammifications of The Sultana's decision to step down as monarch, both in relation to what that means for Ul'dah's government moving forward, and also the general populace's reaction.
The original Psychonauts is a gem within the platforming genre. A fantastically charming and creative acid trip of a game that got me eager to play the sequel right after... but I didn't, because this exists.
Serving as a bridge between the original and its sequel, this short VR title also served as a holdover for people who were eagerly waiting for the sequel. And since it's plot relevant, I just had to play it. Let me just get this out of the way: Rhombus of Ruin is in no way a bad game, which is all the more reason why I hate to give it such a low score. So... what gives? In the end, this is mainly a me problem.
I don't have much experience with VR, but from the few games I've tried, I've learned that I have a very low tolerance for such experiences. VR in general just makes me really motion sick, but that's especially true for games with free movement. While this game doesn't feature said movement, it is hampered by the fact that it is a puzzle game, and puzzle games are not my forte. While the puzzles aren't necessarily very difficult in this game, they often feel that way to me because I tend to get overly disoriented trying to think of solutions in VR, making me susceptible to just touching everything in sight and hoping something works, until my headache gets bad enough that I need a break. As such, I ended up looking up many of the solutions, as embarrassing as that is.
If this game was more of a linear narrative experience without all the puzzles, I would have probably enjoyed it more. As it stands, I still think the humor is solid and the story is decent enough as a sort of interlude to where I do recommend playing it if you are a fan of the main games if you can get it on a sale, but alas, it wasn't a very pleasant experience for me.
Serving as a bridge between the original and its sequel, this short VR title also served as a holdover for people who were eagerly waiting for the sequel. And since it's plot relevant, I just had to play it. Let me just get this out of the way: Rhombus of Ruin is in no way a bad game, which is all the more reason why I hate to give it such a low score. So... what gives? In the end, this is mainly a me problem.
I don't have much experience with VR, but from the few games I've tried, I've learned that I have a very low tolerance for such experiences. VR in general just makes me really motion sick, but that's especially true for games with free movement. While this game doesn't feature said movement, it is hampered by the fact that it is a puzzle game, and puzzle games are not my forte. While the puzzles aren't necessarily very difficult in this game, they often feel that way to me because I tend to get overly disoriented trying to think of solutions in VR, making me susceptible to just touching everything in sight and hoping something works, until my headache gets bad enough that I need a break. As such, I ended up looking up many of the solutions, as embarrassing as that is.
If this game was more of a linear narrative experience without all the puzzles, I would have probably enjoyed it more. As it stands, I still think the humor is solid and the story is decent enough as a sort of interlude to where I do recommend playing it if you are a fan of the main games if you can get it on a sale, but alas, it wasn't a very pleasant experience for me.
Imagine having to wait 16 years for a "proper" sequel and you get this instead. A visual eyesore with some truly cynical level design that tests the player's patience despite its relatively short length. People tend to forget this game even exists, and for good reason. Still, I wanted to try it for myself. After all, I'm on a quest to finish every Sonic game because pointless goals are the spice of life!
But yeah, it's bad. The momentum physics are atrocious, with Sonic accelerating at a snail's pace and feeling extremely heavy to control. Maybe spending 16 years in hibernation left him severely out of shape. And why, oh WHY, are there PUZZLES in a Sonic game?? Let alone a 2D one. "Lost Labyrinth Zone Act 2" had me stuck for 4 minutes trying to figure out this one puzzle where you have to light torches in a specific order and with a specific timing in order to reach a platform to progress. There's plenty of examples of tedious bullshit I can conjure up from my experience, but it's not worth the effort to remember. You already know it's bad, everyone else and their mother knows it's bad. Really, this review is pointless.
Oh, you're wondering why my score isn't lower. Probably because I'm a masochist and still kind of enjoyed it to an extent. Also, I'm still high on adrenaline after beating the final boss on my very last life. SUCK AN EGG, EGGMAN!
P.S. The soundtracks is balls.
But yeah, it's bad. The momentum physics are atrocious, with Sonic accelerating at a snail's pace and feeling extremely heavy to control. Maybe spending 16 years in hibernation left him severely out of shape. And why, oh WHY, are there PUZZLES in a Sonic game?? Let alone a 2D one. "Lost Labyrinth Zone Act 2" had me stuck for 4 minutes trying to figure out this one puzzle where you have to light torches in a specific order and with a specific timing in order to reach a platform to progress. There's plenty of examples of tedious bullshit I can conjure up from my experience, but it's not worth the effort to remember. You already know it's bad, everyone else and their mother knows it's bad. Really, this review is pointless.
Oh, you're wondering why my score isn't lower. Probably because I'm a masochist and still kind of enjoyed it to an extent. Also, I'm still high on adrenaline after beating the final boss on my very last life. SUCK AN EGG, EGGMAN!
P.S. The soundtracks is balls.
And so the journey begins...
What makes a good MMO? That was a rhetorical question. Quite frankly, I have no clue. When it comes to these things, my only real experience prior to FFXIV was Toontown and Club Penguin, with only the former having RPG elements. It was a simple game, and I sank hundreds of hours into it as a kid. Since then, the concept of MMORPGs fascinated me, but rarely did I ever feel the motivation to actually get into one because I knew the time investment would be great, and I lacked the proper motivation to try.
FFXIV has become bigger than anyone could have really imagined back in 2010. A game that was plagued with technical issues, terrible UI, and just plain boring gameplay. I wasn't there for it, but I've heard the horror stories and watched analysis videos. Those were dark times. It amazes me how Yoshi P quickly turned things around. A Realm Reborn was, as the name suggests, a new beginning for this game; a rebirth that kickstarted one of the most interesting and successful comeback stories in gaming. Despite the hype, what ultimately convinced me to try it is my love for the franchise, and, as a new player who jumped on the free trial bandwagon, I have some thoughts so share.
First of all, it took me a long time to finish A Realm Reborn. Not because the story is actually that long, but because I kept taking really long breaks. As someone who's pretty much a MMORPG noob, a lot of XIV's systems and its UI felt very overwhelming from the start. I had to consult Google on multiple occasions just to figure out menial things like how to change my hotbar size. It admittedly turned me off, initially, but as I kept trudging through the main story quests and started getting used to things, I found myself getting into a cathartic rhythm. I was genuinely enjoying my somewhat relaxing newbie experience at first, but, I'm not gonna sugarcoat it... it's true what veteran players say: ARR is a slog. This is something that I didn't really come to terms with until I got about halfway through the MSQs, and this is where those multiple long breaks come in. I would be playing this game for an hour or two at a time and then just forget about it for a few months.
ARR focuses on worldbuilding, and this is what it excels at. You're definitely not going to get a top-tier FF story here (at least, not yet, as I have been told). It all feels like set-up for bigger things to come, and this is definitely exemplified with some pretty foreboding foreshadowing in its ending. By that point, I was fully on board. I would say that in terms of story, ARR took a solid 35-40 hours to "get interesting," and even then, it's still not as balls to the wall as one would expect or would probably hope for. But the small taste I got of Eorzea's vibrant world and its political struggles was enough to satisfy my curiosity for what's to come.
You know, I really didn't think that I'd ever get invested in another MMO quite like I did with Toontown. While these are two very big contrasts, there were times while I was playing this game that I felt that same sense of childlike wonder and intrigue I experienced with TT. There's just something that hits quite different with these massive online worlds that you just don't feel with other games. It's this sense of community; a sense of belonging. You feel like you're there and like you're a part of this world; moreover, you feel appreciated, especially with how welcoming this community is. I'm still not sure what makes a great MMO, but perhaps this is a start. I truly look forward to where this journey through Eorzea's bustling world will take me next and beyond.
My thoughts on the post-game patches:
Patch 2.1 - A Realm Awoken
Patch 2.2 - Through the Maelstrom
Patch 2.3 - Defenders of Eorzea
Patch 2.4 - Dreams of Ice
Patch 2.5 - Before the Fall
Without Post-Game Patches: Light 7/10
With Post-Game Patches: Decent 7/10
What makes a good MMO? That was a rhetorical question. Quite frankly, I have no clue. When it comes to these things, my only real experience prior to FFXIV was Toontown and Club Penguin, with only the former having RPG elements. It was a simple game, and I sank hundreds of hours into it as a kid. Since then, the concept of MMORPGs fascinated me, but rarely did I ever feel the motivation to actually get into one because I knew the time investment would be great, and I lacked the proper motivation to try.
FFXIV has become bigger than anyone could have really imagined back in 2010. A game that was plagued with technical issues, terrible UI, and just plain boring gameplay. I wasn't there for it, but I've heard the horror stories and watched analysis videos. Those were dark times. It amazes me how Yoshi P quickly turned things around. A Realm Reborn was, as the name suggests, a new beginning for this game; a rebirth that kickstarted one of the most interesting and successful comeback stories in gaming. Despite the hype, what ultimately convinced me to try it is my love for the franchise, and, as a new player who jumped on the free trial bandwagon, I have some thoughts so share.
First of all, it took me a long time to finish A Realm Reborn. Not because the story is actually that long, but because I kept taking really long breaks. As someone who's pretty much a MMORPG noob, a lot of XIV's systems and its UI felt very overwhelming from the start. I had to consult Google on multiple occasions just to figure out menial things like how to change my hotbar size. It admittedly turned me off, initially, but as I kept trudging through the main story quests and started getting used to things, I found myself getting into a cathartic rhythm. I was genuinely enjoying my somewhat relaxing newbie experience at first, but, I'm not gonna sugarcoat it... it's true what veteran players say: ARR is a slog. This is something that I didn't really come to terms with until I got about halfway through the MSQs, and this is where those multiple long breaks come in. I would be playing this game for an hour or two at a time and then just forget about it for a few months.
ARR focuses on worldbuilding, and this is what it excels at. You're definitely not going to get a top-tier FF story here (at least, not yet, as I have been told). It all feels like set-up for bigger things to come, and this is definitely exemplified with some pretty foreboding foreshadowing in its ending. By that point, I was fully on board. I would say that in terms of story, ARR took a solid 35-40 hours to "get interesting," and even then, it's still not as balls to the wall as one would expect or would probably hope for. But the small taste I got of Eorzea's vibrant world and its political struggles was enough to satisfy my curiosity for what's to come.
You know, I really didn't think that I'd ever get invested in another MMO quite like I did with Toontown. While these are two very big contrasts, there were times while I was playing this game that I felt that same sense of childlike wonder and intrigue I experienced with TT. There's just something that hits quite different with these massive online worlds that you just don't feel with other games. It's this sense of community; a sense of belonging. You feel like you're there and like you're a part of this world; moreover, you feel appreciated, especially with how welcoming this community is. I'm still not sure what makes a great MMO, but perhaps this is a start. I truly look forward to where this journey through Eorzea's bustling world will take me next and beyond.
My thoughts on the post-game patches:
Patch 2.1 - A Realm Awoken
Patch 2.2 - Through the Maelstrom
Patch 2.3 - Defenders of Eorzea
Patch 2.4 - Dreams of Ice
Patch 2.5 - Before the Fall
Without Post-Game Patches: Light 7/10
With Post-Game Patches: Decent 7/10