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This is the account for Beastiary Beas Plays

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Zero Escape: Zero Time Dilemma
Zero Escape: Zero Time Dilemma

Jul 02

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I had always assumed Metroid Prime's controls scheme is what defined it as a title, remembering the New Play Control! Wii version of the game always felt like something was out of whack. There was too much free reign, cool details like the beam effects had to be sacrificed for the motion controls, so much faffing about to switch beams and visors. I had chalked this up to prehaps the player having too much control then the devs originaly intended and that giving Prime modern controls would yeild that same feeling of dissonance

Wait... Hang on... Oh no, not only has doing still preserved the original game's feeling more then the Wii version did, it's also now the best way to play this game and I simply can never go back lol

I kind of don't have an explination for this? Prehaps traditional twin stick FPS controls actualy do lend themselves more to platforming design then we've been led to belive? Or maybe I have so many playthroughs of the Gamecube version under my belt, I just know where to put the camera for the best experience instinctivly? Whatever the reason this remaster rips and it's a fantastic way to access the game in 2023

- χ

Discovering this game feels like I've peeked into an alternative timeline for Konami's catalouge. For all intensive purposes it feels like we truly lost a "Third one" that could've been a pillar of Konami releases alongside Castlevania and Contra, for games that are thinly veiled reskin of beloved American movie imports.

Like how Castlevania is NOT Hammer's Dracula and Contra is NOT Rambo II, this is NOT Indiana Jones: Temple of Doom. It's not, there's not a cutscene about a stolen orb bringing famine to an indigenous village that takes up Side A of the Disk, there isn't, it's simply not true, don't look it up.

Everything here is peak NES era Konami, the OST is an absolute bop, the sprite work has that rub where it just feels good to walk around and the game's gimmick of a 45 degree upwards grappling hook is very fun. Instead of being restrictve, this thing is busted letting you clip into walls and platforms with relative ease. I know that's technicly a negative, but it does opens up the levels for repeat playthroughs, wondering what silly things you can get up to next

In this game our protagonist Kaito, A COMPLETLY UNIQUE AND ORIGINAL MAN, actualy is a little unique in that his arsenal to attack is made of limited resource items. Thinking about it they couldn't exactly give him a whip to use since another Konami Guy had that gameplay loop covered. Instead Kaito collects items from knives to pistols to Jospeh Joestars clacks as a means of attack. While pretty neat, it does leave a lingering stress on the first playthroughs of running out of the ability to do damage by means of not mastering the game from jump or comitting the cardinal sin of: Dying.

This also encourages hoarding, this game suffers from the unfortunate Konami final boss design of: Face in the wall, summon endless guys, as seen in Vampire Killer. Effectly meaning you'll want to hoard the screen nuke weapon as to not even begin to engage with: Any of that.

Still this gave me the same joy and feels of booting up any NES Konami classic, I can't help but wonder about a world where this game got localised and hit gold. I want to know what the moody SNES title looked like, I want to hear the Gensis Title's inevitably surger soundtrack, I want to know what headass shit they would've done to the games formula for a 3D PS2 entry. But for now we can only wonder.

- Butters

This review contains spoilers

This is a computer game in which the final boss is nationalising a town's water supply, from an oligarch's monopoly. Like what more do you need? That's rad as hell.

Ryza is a highlight in the Atelier series in two ways, it continues the raise in new twists and quality each new entry in the series has been masterfly building on, but it was so refreshing to play one of these games that legitmtly had something, anything, to say.

I would never thought a game with this asthetic and tone would be genuinly relatable, but the way Ryza nails the feeling of growing up in a working class town, where your tallents are villified and pursuits are treated like an inconvenience. The struggle between commitment to a place and the unreasonable compromises said place demands of you.

Oh and it's SO queer-coded, like moving form your tory island hometown to live in a commune so you can finaly persue your intrests and kiss your new aristocrat girlfriend? Immaculate narritive.

There's a reason this is the new standard for Atelier and is the title everyone recomends. If you're looking for your first Atelier, this is THE one!

~ Soffie