what a refreshingly unique genre mash what the Fuuuuuuuck

I think the biggest things holding it back for me are how there isnt really much STORY story going on here and that this shit can be hard as FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!...
but it is So..
Addictive....

walk w/ me here, okay so dicey dungeons is a strategy rpg tht has you using dice and cards to do your spells and attacks for Everything and you can use diffferent powers to push things about this formula in your favor
there's typing combinations
there's different characters
hell there's different enemy types you can use their weaknesses and strengths against them on too

my personal favorite to play outside of the warrior (the technically Easiest one and most straightforward one) is the Robot i fucking love the chance tha t can go into this shit
i love chance chance chance i love gambling in things so much i wish there was more games centered around it

really thats all i got here, there's nice variety galore and its kind of hard to explain the nitty gritty of some of the gameplay mechanics through text and not displaying what goes on myself
but i do think that this system isnt PERFECT.. sometimes there'll be a choice to make ingame and you literally will not be able to make it if youre genuinely just that unlucky with some shit
but it is what it isssssssss
Some runs will genuinely just suck ass for you and youll have wished you did smthng different

final thoughts: its a Mother FUCKER of a game sometimes, b ut so charming and so addictive that even though im writing this rn and ive seen warrior's conclusion
i dont know when ill ever be able to really say im Truly DONE with dicey dungeons? maybe if i get pissed off enough at trying to play as the witch ill think so, god i fcking hate playing as her

My understanding of Japanese is WAY too shitty to make sense of this all but I feel like... does that Matter much? well yes obviously its a game entirely in japanese.. but also No! because you cant really face any penalty in this game in a way that actually matters
segare ijiri is a game where you play as a little arrowfuck combining japanese characters together and watching dumb little cutscenes and flipbook slideshows to summon and spawn weirdos and random things and locations to try and make your disembodied giraffe headneck mother happy and reaching the pink arrowheaded fuck girl

You quickly grasp that the gameplay mostly centers around watching the silly shit play out and traversing through a windows movie maker ass simplistic domain with some pretty fun models and means of traversal that make for this rly specifically weird and unique vibe that I really like actually :)

Im ranking it this high because its overall a pretty pleasant experience, theres some fun shit jokes and visuals and really the fact that its an adventure platformer with minigames while also being technically a text oriented game is VERY INTERESTING...

final thoughts: arrowfuck and lex from bookworm adventures should form their own literary greek pantheon and cook smthn up
itd be like jujutsu kaisen domain expansion shit but the whole english and japanese language history skullfucks any sniveling jackass in their wake

you START to feel like it fuckin rocks with the art style and the freneticness of dishing out beef bowls but likeeee
there's some problems here lmfao
i got this to see if it'd scratch the sort of fast-service food itch i like doing in video games like overcooked or diner dash or somethin along those lines
a lotta my friends HATE shit like that but I actually find the stress.... fun! for hm... some reason! idk! kinda like when i realized i enjoy movies that make me feel a lot of suspense and thrill and worry for whats happening explicitly to the characters even if they suck, how will they stumble
how will they succeed or choke aa!

ahem. this is very different though this is a game definitely made to advertise and self-suck beef bowls and yoshinoya meals in general
its like if nesquik had a game about stirring nesquik powder into cups of milk and splashing them in the faces of geriatric children(?) as a rabbit

but all that aside i think its cool the game has BOSS. FIGHT. and such but there's only really three levels here and i think its just EHHHHHHH....... like its fun for a bit but i think it being leashed and ball-chained to the floor as a tool for something clearly meant to be a mouthpiece at you to eat their shit weighs it down and definitely has me wishing there was another game in this visual style and takin the boss battle idea and expanding on it in something different.
thats p much it though!

i had a sigh of relief wash over me when i saw there was AT L E A S T people on backloggd that didnt have this game fly under them undetected. this was so short but so speciallll ill circle back to my moaning after the meat of my review is done but Enjoy The Diner is an interesting visual novel to me because its one of the few where i feel like it aims for a specific limited color paletted art style of about 4-5 colors max to really give off the baked in nightly moon vibe and feel going on for the game
I love this art style in it's simplicity and atmosphere it has goin on :>
This premise yanked me in really quick because a compact (all things considered i mean it is technically a restaraunt setting) diner with a handful of characters goes a long way when the writing is really nice and the story doesnt really overstay its welcome to the length

It's a bit hard to tack down how this game makes me feel but for frame of reference this game borders on melancholy but never in the way that i feel like is heavy handed with what its getting across, the messages and themes of persisting against time. Living with mistakes and even the passage of time feeling like a blink or an eternity thats stopped mattering or even feeling the constraints of the fabric of reality at all. Like a purgatory but youre still able to freely do as you like with interacting with others, get a drink from the soda machine, maybe rifle through something thatd otherwise be impossible to figure out within your own lifetime
you have a short time in the diner but i feel like when youre in it you dont notice how much time's passed, sometimes i sat in different corners of the diner just listening to the OST (which i t hought was so fucking pleasant there was two options to go through with the steam version but i picked the old one but i iknow the newer stuff is really nice too)

its like almost entrancing
i think i like literally all of these characters but if i had to pick a fave im picking Laterre obviously hm i wonder where she is
oh well,

play it if you got some hours to kill, dont rush, soak in it
enjoy th- gunshots and thunder crackling uh. yea do the thing if u wanna.. i loved it for whatever thats worth..

also uh.
can this game get like atleast 30% more popular bc the only person on youtube thats really extensively covered it is a vtuber and shes a sweetie for being like the only motherfucker on that site to really do a full playthrough like that

but also aside from the steam page there really is not many ppl not from japan that ik that even Know Of this game

and its TECHNICALLY(this version atleast) NEW
but, even if it doesnt BANG bang im content with the offhanded occasion that i do get to see some more lovely fanart of the characters, listen to the ost more standalone
and mull over how awesome itd be to drink a penguin soda
or rlly any of those sodas in that machine sound delicious and mouthawtering good omg

...
nobody told me the spot the difference book wasnt progression related by the way, i found that by accident and ws so disappointed bc i thought haha yes!! yeS!! YES!!!!! MUAHAHAHA im so owning this shit

and i suppose that in it of itself doesnt really matter because time spent is not time wasted when youre enjoying and savoring.

yeah this really does suck bitch, its genuinely just pinball with austin powers flavortext...
i still havent seen the second one i dont think but
i got a giggle, twice. out of this.

uh , it rlly sucks though
especially the mission objective shit which deadass does Not matter in pinball whatsoever atleast not in one as transparently vanilla as this, which is ironic for a game abt a hypersexual british guy.

final thoughts: i sent myself into a booming laughing fit seeing "gotham games" on this bc this made me immediately thought bubble up bruce wayne trying to run a fund for kids charity and having a game made free for kids to play with him coverin the expenses and the result being this bull shit n them hating him

1st game completed in the new year of 2024 and it uhhh
it sure was A Choice!
I dug it enough bc the atmosphere is cool and I cant really think of anything horror related that has a night shift convenience store as the main schtick, which is pretty fun

Unfortunately like, i dont really think i enjoyed much beyond that and base experience, i feel like there couldve been more scares goin on here and there that were more subtle
It was a fun feeling looking through the cameras but there's only so much it takes advantage of with what it's got goin on here bc of the less than 1 hour playtime

but it was a LITTLE cool, i threw my hands up confused by how the game wraps up in its "various" ways, kinda dissatisfied with that.

uhhh but its dirt cheap and its a nice little unique slice of horror i think that justifies atleast Looking at this as a nice piece of interactive art if not a potently scary horror game at the very least.

final thoughts: that tv puzzle was fucking with me heavy bitch oh my god LMAO i had to turn off all the visually flair-y aesthetics and vhs everything and ram up that brightness to properly scope out what TVs that kid was even looking at that took me longer to do than literally anything else in the game, which is funny

im actually in sheer awe, im the first bitch to actually log this game but also like?? i found this by sheer accident in my library and saw it uninstalled
saw the last news update for the game said it got removed from steam because of.... copyright stuff!!..

Uhhhhhhhh so i guess this might be the lost media?? im not sure!! but seeing as literally nobody's even interacted with this game's listing it might be true

but how is the game?

U h.
it feels like an unfinished first game ever tht someone did! the atmosphere is great! ... thats kinda it!!!
the combat is bad LMAO but it feelsl ike its just missing that ingredient hwere the enemies actually feel recoil and knockback or.. SOME level of resistance to make the combat not mind numbing

but also there was so many bugs.. it ws crazy, even talkin to NPCs was fucked

i can hope the ppl tht made this atleast went on to make something like.. FINISHED.. and GOOD..
cause there was clearly an intent here atleast to do something cool

"OH BOYYY SODAAAAAAA!"
its almost like a playable adult swim gag and i mean tht in a good way
soda drinker pro has about 102 levels and some of them were blurs but this isnt really a game i can think of you getting a lot of humorous enjoyment out of in a consecutive hour and a half of playtime.. Probably
atleast, thats how i felt lol
Like i was amused! and i enjoyed seeing all the different locations and differences but I dont think this is the type of thing to be played all in one shot

I think the movement speed is objectively awful though for some of these other objectives with achievements and such
infact you can just hold the buttons to drink soda the whoole time and be done with it real quick
but that isnt really very much fun because theres a lot of silly stuff to encounter just by soaking it in

you could say this is a game best suited for sips and not shotgunning the whole thing at once, i liked it :)

also this game released the exact same day as Homestuck ended

what?

well its true

HMMMM YKNOW I WAS ACTUALLY GETTIN A LITTLE SAD BC I INCURRED A WEIRD ASS GLITCH THT MADE ME RESTART THE GAME FROM THE BEGINNING BUUUUUUUUUUUUT i actually did love the segment where you and bittergiggle are working together and really just how it can happen At All

in a way garten of banban 6 to me feels like the most Connections felt one in the series because nearly all of the dialogue culminates from the time everyone's had around each other, it reminds me of sentiments i felt with Yakuza 3 with how interactions in that and moments of passing pause, banter and small talk feel Earned
I ALSO RLLY LIKE HOW THEY TOOK ADVANTAGE OF HOW DARK THE GAME CAN GET IN AMBIANCE AND USED THT FOR THIS WHOLE HUB AREA even if the drone is sometimes finicky but wht else is new its the drone lmao

I think that the most fair criticism of this one that ive seen is that its not really trying to be scary in this one and its pretty easy to avoid not dying in this chapter aside form two segments of the game. Though I actually think its Fine that this direction is taken bc thats where the narrative's shifted, by this point in the story the parent has made so many interactions with all these characters it almost feels like this net of safety is waning really thin

Dadadoo especially is actually a capable fighter and everything but his plan is crazy because i think it might deadass get chapter 7 to be the most isolating chapter since the first one oooo

It'd be far too much to recap ALL of the lore and new tidbits ive picked up on here but this was definitely a top 3 chapter takin everything into account from before
im so glad opium baby is safe
but also... im actually really taken aback by how this is the ONLY chapter in the game thus far that doesnt even have one glimpse of jumbo josh(hes visible in the murals still and even in the secret room you can see him part of the banban & friends big five buuuuuuuuuut.. YEAH.) like w o a h not even in the big revelation at the end of the chapter.

I think 4 has some rlly high points but also rlly tedious lows with some puzzles while this one felt like it had a great finale and some good series highs while having so so lows
WHO IS NANNY THOUGH
and i cant believe the surgeon got attached enough to start making his own kids, hes gotta be if not strong one of the most interesting characters in-verse when we get there
also the amount of ppl confused why this is out and not five. i get it cause like even though five is a prequel.. this noticably took longer to come out than the other chapters and in the other chapters, i never experienced any softlocking bugs/glitches
soooo....... i think smthin mighta given the dev bros trouble with this one or simply working on two chapters at the same time is taking a little toll on them

this shit sucks bitch LMFAO
its not even like buggy or glitchy its just mostly BORING
it doesnt got puzzles really
its got you bein able to freely swap between all the m&ms and they all have different powers!!..... but literally none of that matters unless it feels like a section you Should be playing with a certain m&m
there's no bosses
its score based too, it kinda just feels like a game thtd be up for display in a kiosk to keep kids busy waiting in line and thatssssss iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit
the plot is just "Oh! the factory is fucked! lets unfuck it!" and then they do that and the game ends abruptly when youve hit all the switchyleverpully thingies

i DO like the sprites for this game though!! and its impossible for me to give half a star to smthin thats just mostly inoffensive and boring and lame tht also manages to have playable green m&m i love her so much
we love a woman of color taking charge for the good of the general public <3 and her weenie ass men friends <33

though now tht i think abt it
why does the blue m&m have sunglasses here and yet no where else to speak of
its such a good design upgrade, the hell

While this is a lot more restraining than Minecraft and has less going on than Terraria and doesn't really boast a survival flow as viscous and palpably oppressive as Don't Starve at it's peak

This is fine!
I think it looks great and its good all the fortnite skins are getting a secondary update for more shit via this mode
I think the inventory interface is really one of the two main banes of this game that keep me from singing its praises LOUD because fuck is it annoying sometimes LMFAO nothing autostacks and manually needing to press some shit for it for somethin that should be simple dragging and dropping is ridiculous and that shit should be CHANGED cmon now bitch

And then the map variety is cool and i like crafting stuff for the village, i think im expecting the bulk of future enjoyment to follow with updates because for now I think this is just a really good idea that can get enhanced and improved overtime as is with anything else
this is technically a done game... TECHNICALLY
but
I highly doubt its just going to be different skins to look forward to for the rest of time

All in all in the back of my mind it's really fucking crazy how this franchise used to be just a one off game up and coming as a zombie survival thing and now it's practically just a ROBLOX esque game and i actually really love that its made me want to check out some of the more custom made things instead of just playing the battle royale modes even though thats typically gonna be why im firing up the thing anyways

i know the niggas that vote for game awards nominees don't play video games because if they did this would be in the nominee for best soundtrack easily. There's so much combined effort and talent into making this an authentic spiritual successor but also not doin too much of the Old or sticking within the mold of JSR/JSRF to the point where it feels like its seekin to repeat the same 1:1 beats

I think all the locals you go to kick ass and i really like a lot of the playable characters you got going on here, i cant really think of anyone in the cast i dont care for :) i GUESS if i had to pick one i guess id say Coil would be my least fave but I was already sinking a lot of time into Mataan arc of the game and I think thats less on him and more like I was just eager to play more of the story campaign and didnt do much in the way of dicking around with him
THE MIDDLE POINT PSYCHE SHIT THAT GOES DOWN IS FUCKING AWESOME TOO LIKE YOU DONTEVEN HAVE A TIME REQUIREMENT OR ANYTHING BUT LIKE the way those levels flow is so nice I would be tryin to hold a really huge combo in those regardless.
Having alternate gear to use kicks ass too but im ngl, i actually never was able to tell if one had advantages over the other
And im kinda glad about that because i could just pick whatever i thought looked cooler lololol
i think skateboards rock but i was really leanin towards the bike i love beating some ass with a bike its so sick

I think my biggest gripes are just how there's no retry button, the combat can be KINDAAAAAAAA JAAAAAAANK, and all in all i guess if we're splittin hairs
the game is very easy
Like this is a splitting hairs thing to me because its like.. "yeah, youre getting good combos consistently and you understood and utilized the land to your advantage and made it yours yeah!" like i DO think the more abstract levels and the challenge hidden areas REALLY show what this dev team's made of while also understanding THE CONCEPTOFLOVEHAUHUGHVRWUGH mm. the assignment

was also really not expecting this to have a story like that
its both KINDA SERIOUS but also CHILL because like
there's some blood here and there and niggas DYINGGG but like
sometimes a character gets some shit happenin to them its like 'what does death mean in this universe'
even in gameplay when you die you dont really lose much of anything so it gets to where youre thinkin less on that and pickin yourself up and getting back at it
This game has a really good message about not lettin how you were born define you or how skilled you are at somethin defining you either, or even your age
Sayin that its what you make of the shit youre given is one of the realest things ever
im so thankfjul i got to play this this year since i was broke and my girl marlowe got me it as a surprise bday gift :) she rules for that and i hope shes well even if she's not readin this

The biggest itching feeling I felt when I finished was that I didn't want it to end though and thts a magical bittersweetness to feel with this, it almost doesnt even feel real that this is even OUT
i followed along the development with a loose eye for what feels like 5 years now at this point and you mean to tell me it came out, its good, and also got more than JUST naganuma in on the ost (very important)
ANDDDDDDDDDD made enough waves for SEGA to catch wind
i guess we'll see if jet set radio 3 is gonna stack well as this.. but even IF sega manages to do another good jsr I think itll never outright null what this game Is and Accomplishes
its a love letter, its an homage but its also doin its own thing
its not getting high off its own supply its jettisoning its shit to an entirely diferent ayer and layer going up and on.
i lve you brc
and 2 mello..
also where the fuck is the vinyl x rise tender yuri art