JohnDouche
2002
Listen, I get that it was the first game in this series, but man I just didn't care for it. And I feel that's because this game is walking talking contradiction. It desperately wants to be a fast paced action game but half of the missions are slow tedious crap like escorting soldiers or trying to find all the bombs in an area. It wants to be and play super smooth but then whoops there were spikes you couldn't see there sorry! It wants to have an impressive interconnected world but nothing connects in an interesting way and it also means you'll be revisting tons of older areas more than once causing the world to ironically feel smaller. The game wants to have RPG aspects but you have to go out of your way to stop the pace of the game to do grinding (unless you're like me and just brute forced it). The worst part is that when the game is good it's fucking great. So in short I really hope the sequel is better and lives up to the potential shown here.
1989
Idk guys. Yeah it's faithful to the Zelda CD-I games but that means the gameplay is extremely lacking/repetitive. And I'll be real I just didn't think this game was nearly as funny as what it's based on. That was genuine which made it funny, here it almost feels a little too try hard. Not bad at all, but man just not for me.
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