MaxyBee
2017
Charming AND weirdly unpleasant (complimentary), be still my beating heart.
2021
What a game! A tightening up and paring down of the original's experience, save for a wonky but still enjoyable boss fight at the end, it really shows how far the core concept can go. AND IF THAT WEREN'T ENOUGH, the three bonus levels show experimentation and variation for how Toree can broaden out, in ways that felt peculiarly Gex-like (I blame the televisions in the first bonus level).
I'm insatiable now. This and its predecessor were fantastic pocket experiences. Now I want to see a fully-fleshed out entry, or at least one twice the length, and with more of the bonus experimentation on display. What a hoot.
I'm insatiable now. This and its predecessor were fantastic pocket experiences. Now I want to see a fully-fleshed out entry, or at least one twice the length, and with more of the bonus experimentation on display. What a hoot.
2017
Do we not talk about the level design of Metroid enough? Of Metroidvanias/search action titles in general? Is it not one of, if not THE most important aspect to these titles, both a casual play perspective and those of sequence breakers and speed runners?
This is a game that removes that fundamental part of these titles, replacing it with a random arrangement of pre-designed rooms that essentially exist in isolation. No matter how good one specific bit of design can be, one well-designed landmark, it is an island unto itself, interacting not one bit with the world outside of it. To turn a search action title into a roguelike in this specific manner feels utterly, woefully pointless.
It’s not like parts of this aren’t proven ideas heading in. Randomisers match the same thrilling ‘what power-up will I get here’ feeling that Fight provides, but without the sort of genius level design of a Super Metroid, the ability to skillfully navigate without the intended power-ups are lost, and so a power-up that allows progress HAS to be in the rough area you’re playing within. The concepts are proven, it’s in the execution that they fail.
Some positives. It looks good, and the unpleasant fleshiness of enemies and environments carries the machines vs meat theming of the storyline really well. It feels good to play, power-ups depending, and by the end of a run you feel obscenely powerful, firing endless projectiles all over the screen constantly. That visual and feeling is at the centre of many a quality roguelike, and the creators should be proud of that.
The music is inoffensive, which is to say I barely noticed it. Almost criminal in a search action title, but not the worst thing in gaming overall. There’s just a high bar here.
And that’s… maybe all there is to say. I didn’t hate this, despite the fundamental failure that’s at its core. That’s worth something, but that something only amounts to two stars. If I believed in half stars it may be higher, but I don’t, so it isn’t. Get it cheap if you get the chance, don’t if you don’t.
you absolutely can still sequence break, and you unlock a key retro ability by doing so, but in this game all that really means is ‘I made it through a hot/dark room without dying’.
This is a game that removes that fundamental part of these titles, replacing it with a random arrangement of pre-designed rooms that essentially exist in isolation. No matter how good one specific bit of design can be, one well-designed landmark, it is an island unto itself, interacting not one bit with the world outside of it. To turn a search action title into a roguelike in this specific manner feels utterly, woefully pointless.
It’s not like parts of this aren’t proven ideas heading in. Randomisers match the same thrilling ‘what power-up will I get here’ feeling that Fight provides, but without the sort of genius level design of a Super Metroid, the ability to skillfully navigate without the intended power-ups are lost, and so a power-up that allows progress HAS to be in the rough area you’re playing within. The concepts are proven, it’s in the execution that they fail.
Some positives. It looks good, and the unpleasant fleshiness of enemies and environments carries the machines vs meat theming of the storyline really well. It feels good to play, power-ups depending, and by the end of a run you feel obscenely powerful, firing endless projectiles all over the screen constantly. That visual and feeling is at the centre of many a quality roguelike, and the creators should be proud of that.
The music is inoffensive, which is to say I barely noticed it. Almost criminal in a search action title, but not the worst thing in gaming overall. There’s just a high bar here.
And that’s… maybe all there is to say. I didn’t hate this, despite the fundamental failure that’s at its core. That’s worth something, but that something only amounts to two stars. If I believed in half stars it may be higher, but I don’t, so it isn’t. Get it cheap if you get the chance, don’t if you don’t.
you absolutely can still sequence break, and you unlock a key retro ability by doing so, but in this game all that really means is ‘I made it through a hot/dark room without dying’.
It's hard to tell what's fucked in Sunshine for poor emulation or what's fucked because it was held together by tape and optimism.
A decent collection with nothing special to it, save a music player, which a Switch isn't best made to be. Docked compromises for Galaxy are kind of shit, but this is a great game, a good game, and an okay game all lumped together, which is worth around £30 and 3 stars.
A decent collection with nothing special to it, save a music player, which a Switch isn't best made to be. Docked compromises for Galaxy are kind of shit, but this is a great game, a good game, and an okay game all lumped together, which is worth around £30 and 3 stars.
If you know then you know
2013
Replayed recently, and lowering my score a whole star, as for all the neat aesthetic and the creative elements add to it, it’s kind of a shit to actually enjoy playing.
This review contains spoilers
Just about the only way you could have made another Monkey Island. A striking visual style, a simple and straightforward gameplay style that facilitates classic point n click puzzle solving, painful amounts of self-awareness and a combined amount of reverence and light mockery of what came before.
For the most part it reminds me of Curse, until a later act opens up and becomes VERY evocative of Lechuck’s Revenge. If you’re going to be like any two games in the series that’s what you need to hone in on, the best Gilbert game and the only truly excellent post-Gilbert game. But JUST reminding me of the other games would make for nothing but a tired carbon copy, and I feel like what we’re given here has enough fresh ideas and interesting twists on the world that it stands as its own thing. A thing that mostly asks “after all this time, is it worth it”.
There’s an idea running through this, that the irresponsible way Guybrush ruins everything in his path to his ultimate goal is as destructive and obsessive as LeChuck’s, and when this outing has him joining LeChuck’s crew, and teaming with a new trio of dastardly and calculating pirates, all in the name of finding the Secret of Monkey Island™️, it’s hard to argue otherwise.
There’s even a… vibe, a sort of weird unease with him and Elaine, two people clearly in love, but… things are weird. Elaine ‘misplaces’ half of a picture of her and Guybrush (the Guybrush half) to a seagull. Her own aims of an anti-scurvy lime initiative is undermined by Guybrush taking the prototype flyer design workshopped with Stan and immediately giving it away, preventing copies from being made. She calmly explains how Guybrush’s decisions have caused harm on the walk to the final area. They aren’t strained, the two clearly love each other to a disgustingly cute extent, but things aren’t perfect either.
I feel like this could have gone somewhere for the ending, but we get another fun meta ending playing into the framing device of the whole game instead, which just kind of ends the story and we get a nice bit showing that the two are still together and happy with their kid, which is nice. Probably less of a bummer than what we could have got, but with another left-field ending like this from Gilbert and co. you just kind of wish that they cared a little more about giving a sense of closure. But then I like Twin Peaks so closure is for losers, actually.
The only thing keeping this from five stars is how often I got stuck on slightly laborious puzzles, but the hint system is generous enough that it didn’t hold me up, and I’m not so proud as to NOT use the in-inventory hint system, I know my limitations, but sometimes just hearing the answer makes you sigh at how awkward some puzzles are. Nothing as bad as in Broken Age, but definitely ones that weren’t as fun or thought out as they could have been.
But that aside? Amazing game, gonna replay the whole series soon just to relish in it all again.
For the most part it reminds me of Curse, until a later act opens up and becomes VERY evocative of Lechuck’s Revenge. If you’re going to be like any two games in the series that’s what you need to hone in on, the best Gilbert game and the only truly excellent post-Gilbert game. But JUST reminding me of the other games would make for nothing but a tired carbon copy, and I feel like what we’re given here has enough fresh ideas and interesting twists on the world that it stands as its own thing. A thing that mostly asks “after all this time, is it worth it”.
There’s an idea running through this, that the irresponsible way Guybrush ruins everything in his path to his ultimate goal is as destructive and obsessive as LeChuck’s, and when this outing has him joining LeChuck’s crew, and teaming with a new trio of dastardly and calculating pirates, all in the name of finding the Secret of Monkey Island™️, it’s hard to argue otherwise.
There’s even a… vibe, a sort of weird unease with him and Elaine, two people clearly in love, but… things are weird. Elaine ‘misplaces’ half of a picture of her and Guybrush (the Guybrush half) to a seagull. Her own aims of an anti-scurvy lime initiative is undermined by Guybrush taking the prototype flyer design workshopped with Stan and immediately giving it away, preventing copies from being made. She calmly explains how Guybrush’s decisions have caused harm on the walk to the final area. They aren’t strained, the two clearly love each other to a disgustingly cute extent, but things aren’t perfect either.
I feel like this could have gone somewhere for the ending, but we get another fun meta ending playing into the framing device of the whole game instead, which just kind of ends the story and we get a nice bit showing that the two are still together and happy with their kid, which is nice. Probably less of a bummer than what we could have got, but with another left-field ending like this from Gilbert and co. you just kind of wish that they cared a little more about giving a sense of closure. But then I like Twin Peaks so closure is for losers, actually.
The only thing keeping this from five stars is how often I got stuck on slightly laborious puzzles, but the hint system is generous enough that it didn’t hold me up, and I’m not so proud as to NOT use the in-inventory hint system, I know my limitations, but sometimes just hearing the answer makes you sigh at how awkward some puzzles are. Nothing as bad as in Broken Age, but definitely ones that weren’t as fun or thought out as they could have been.
But that aside? Amazing game, gonna replay the whole series soon just to relish in it all again.
Mr Driller DrillLand is kind of an odd duck, having a very broad selection of ways to play some Mr Driller good times, including a VERY enjoyable Tower of Druaga tribute, and I don't think there's a better way of playing Mr Driller out there. But it's presented very poorly, with a very cheap feeling to the localisation, cutscenes, and bonuses that are all just the absolute bare minimum, save the fun ending cinematic.
But I mean.... it's all in service to one of the best puzzle games out there, so can't complain.
But I mean.... it's all in service to one of the best puzzle games out there, so can't complain.
It's very odd going back to Mortal Kombat 9, after three other games in the series (and two Injustices) have refined the modern Netherealm fighter to a razor-sharp point. The core gameplay is there. The wonderful approach to a story mode is there, highlighting several characters across its many chapters. The look is... well, miles off, actually. It's juvenile with so much of our cast's designs, in a way not uncharacteristic for the franchise, but that stands out compared to the other games in this trilogy (quadrilogy? MK1 occupies a weird space that makes this a difficult call). Sonya in particular is a cartoonish pair of fake breasts beneath some sort of generic military sleeveless jacket deal, like if Ash Ketchum fucked.
It's just all not quite there yet. The studio has to grow into a true industry leader position, with a... I won't say maturity, but more maturity than this. The gameplay has to become more fluid and less prone to cheap fucking around (and gets there quick in MKX), and that absurd level of visual polish the series is now known for has to actually happen.
But it is good. The story is good. It's a hoot to play. If I'd ever finished up with it when it came out it would have a higher score. But knowing that it only gets better makes it that much harder to score above a 3. Worth it if you want the whole story, but maybe just breeze through on lower difficulties so you can move on to the sequels.
It's just all not quite there yet. The studio has to grow into a true industry leader position, with a... I won't say maturity, but more maturity than this. The gameplay has to become more fluid and less prone to cheap fucking around (and gets there quick in MKX), and that absurd level of visual polish the series is now known for has to actually happen.
But it is good. The story is good. It's a hoot to play. If I'd ever finished up with it when it came out it would have a higher score. But knowing that it only gets better makes it that much harder to score above a 3. Worth it if you want the whole story, but maybe just breeze through on lower difficulties so you can move on to the sequels.
2013
Simple, elegant design pushed to the limits of timing, twitch reactions, memory and flow. There’s some sort of narration happening but I have transcended.
I am the circle.
I am the balls.
I will spin.
Forever.
I wi-ah shit I hit a block again. Four stars.
Something to appreciate here is I failed a lot, but never got mad. I just kind of laughed at myself, knowing exactly the timing I needed, shrugged it off and tried again. That’s a special and rare thing in games. I appreciate it for that as much as anything else.
The extra challenges are for psychotics, mind.
I am the circle.
I am the balls.
I will spin.
Forever.
I wi-ah shit I hit a block again. Four stars.
Something to appreciate here is I failed a lot, but never got mad. I just kind of laughed at myself, knowing exactly the timing I needed, shrugged it off and tried again. That’s a special and rare thing in games. I appreciate it for that as much as anything else.
The extra challenges are for psychotics, mind.
2020
I've unlocked the cursed bosses and I think I'm done, at least for now, through a combination of satisfaction with this milestone and fatigue starting to set in.
A twin stick shooter roguelike that feels like if Metal Slug was strapped to Binding of Isaac, but without the wildly creative gameplay of the former or the captivating aesthetic of the latter. That should be an insult, but those are the heights of run 'n gun and rogue-likes, and to have aimed for those and missed (the point) is no bad thing.
After some time away I may come back and check out the cursed bosses and the dlc, but for now Neon Abyss gets three stars, a vague thumbs up, and off of my steam deck.
A twin stick shooter roguelike that feels like if Metal Slug was strapped to Binding of Isaac, but without the wildly creative gameplay of the former or the captivating aesthetic of the latter. That should be an insult, but those are the heights of run 'n gun and rogue-likes, and to have aimed for those and missed (the point) is no bad thing.
After some time away I may come back and check out the cursed bosses and the dlc, but for now Neon Abyss gets three stars, a vague thumbs up, and off of my steam deck.
2008
So many games in one, and all of them quite naff. Creature creator has fun to it, mind.
2005
Jank, but that GOOD jank, you know?
2008
Inti Creates, right? When Mega Man 9 came out they were ten years deep in the game, and had made some 18 games and (two hidden psx gems aside) had mostly seen success in the seven Mega Man games they'd made alongside Capcom, especially the legendary GBA series Mega Man Zero. So it makes sense that these were the guys to be trusted with the 9th entry in the classic series, which had been lying dormant for a good while. You'd expect them to be a safe bet, as long as they didn't do Battle Chip Challenge again.
It was, indeed, safe. Mega Man 9 is every bit a classic Mega Man game with the fat stripped out. Forget the charge shot, forget the slide (I miss the slide), forget the anime leanings, this is Mega Man as it suits ME, a gameplay-first experience that highlights the things that made the first couple of games as brilliant as they were, with only a few shiny new level gimmicks lumped in along the way.
It's not particularly original. Robot Masters and their weapons rarely surprise, and some weapons are just slightly more busted versions of fan-favourites, but it's game 9 in a series! Originality is optional at this point! We're all getting old and we just need Mega Man to jump, shoot, kill, and for Wily to appear and disappear in a little pod for the final battle. That'll do, just this once.
What we get instead of originality is polish, and MM9 has this in spades. Everything feels good, everything is clear, understandable, interacts cleanly and does what you want it to do. This shines most in the actual level designs, the real stars versus the robot masters, challenging but not unfair jaunts through enemy territory where you can use the robot master's weakness to progress easier, but YOU NEED THAT FOR THE BOSS. Elegant. Simple. Choices.
If I had three criticisms, and I do, it's that the designers love spikes too much, that I have no idea how I was supposed to know to use concrete on lava, and that the store is more pointless than ever.
Instant death is miserable, and Mega Man having it via endless spikes is just an admittance that the designers couldn't build ample threat elsewhere. It betrays a lack of diversity of thought, that no-one was bring enough ideas to the table to lessen their presence.
Seriously, why does concrete temporarily freeze lava. How does that work? What's supposed to prompt a-ha style seratonin here? Concrete. Sure.
The store is just wank. The energy balancer should be a default option. E Tanks should be in more stages as side challenges. Lives do not matter in this game at all thanks to the save system. Everything else feels like so much fluff (sorry Eddy and Beat) and it just leads to you going into Plug Man's stage, standing under a pipe or two, and leaving your game an hour or so it can grind endlessly with the power of diamonds. Get rid of it, or get ideas for more fun shit to do with it beyond taking your helmet off a bit or Roll looking a bit different. Awful thing.
But those are petty complaints. I genuinely love this game and would rank it up with the best in the series. Well, not up with Mega Man 3, but as close as it can get to that without its wings of wax melting.
Four stars, and don't you forget it.
It was, indeed, safe. Mega Man 9 is every bit a classic Mega Man game with the fat stripped out. Forget the charge shot, forget the slide (I miss the slide), forget the anime leanings, this is Mega Man as it suits ME, a gameplay-first experience that highlights the things that made the first couple of games as brilliant as they were, with only a few shiny new level gimmicks lumped in along the way.
It's not particularly original. Robot Masters and their weapons rarely surprise, and some weapons are just slightly more busted versions of fan-favourites, but it's game 9 in a series! Originality is optional at this point! We're all getting old and we just need Mega Man to jump, shoot, kill, and for Wily to appear and disappear in a little pod for the final battle. That'll do, just this once.
What we get instead of originality is polish, and MM9 has this in spades. Everything feels good, everything is clear, understandable, interacts cleanly and does what you want it to do. This shines most in the actual level designs, the real stars versus the robot masters, challenging but not unfair jaunts through enemy territory where you can use the robot master's weakness to progress easier, but YOU NEED THAT FOR THE BOSS. Elegant. Simple. Choices.
If I had three criticisms, and I do, it's that the designers love spikes too much, that I have no idea how I was supposed to know to use concrete on lava, and that the store is more pointless than ever.
Instant death is miserable, and Mega Man having it via endless spikes is just an admittance that the designers couldn't build ample threat elsewhere. It betrays a lack of diversity of thought, that no-one was bring enough ideas to the table to lessen their presence.
Seriously, why does concrete temporarily freeze lava. How does that work? What's supposed to prompt a-ha style seratonin here? Concrete. Sure.
The store is just wank. The energy balancer should be a default option. E Tanks should be in more stages as side challenges. Lives do not matter in this game at all thanks to the save system. Everything else feels like so much fluff (sorry Eddy and Beat) and it just leads to you going into Plug Man's stage, standing under a pipe or two, and leaving your game an hour or so it can grind endlessly with the power of diamonds. Get rid of it, or get ideas for more fun shit to do with it beyond taking your helmet off a bit or Roll looking a bit different. Awful thing.
But those are petty complaints. I genuinely love this game and would rank it up with the best in the series. Well, not up with Mega Man 3, but as close as it can get to that without its wings of wax melting.
Four stars, and don't you forget it.
This review contains spoilers
This is an odd one. As a game it kind of blows. The setting and core concept are poorly explored and don't match Metroid or the puzzle design. A facility like this simply should not require different explosives and lasers to unlock doors on fairly benign levels. The enemy design is balls. Literally. The final stretch with constantly draining health, trying to get to health machines before you die is a pain in the arse rather than tense, especially as it isn't always clear what will progress you. Trial and error, and save states were necessary.
But the mechanical stuff is grand. Minor changes to things like your morph ball bombs (your ball now pulses rather than drops bombs) show an intent to be different, and I learned things about the shinespark I never knew before.
I just wish it was in a better game. One for the fans, if nothing else.
But the mechanical stuff is grand. Minor changes to things like your morph ball bombs (your ball now pulses rather than drops bombs) show an intent to be different, and I learned things about the shinespark I never knew before.
I just wish it was in a better game. One for the fans, if nothing else.