Maybe I should give Video Games a chance
How I got into games again as a young adult through YT Essays and Choosing the right ones to play myself.
In my early teens I became disinterested in Video Games and even looked down on them after witnessing a family member piss in bottles during 24/7 WOW sessions and rarely picked up the controller when friends played shit like COD or Fifa on their systems. Even back then I was kind of a little pretentious shit who was obsessed with all other art-forms, but didn't see anything in Video Games other than an expensive Toy I felt no desire to play with.
This here is kind of my History and a list of not necessarily just Games themselves, but also YouTube essays or videos about them that step by step helped me to give gaming a serious chance for the first time since my childhood and even further, helped me view them as a legitimate art-form. Since then, ca. 2017 early 2018, I binged played a shit ton of games and it became the main medium I consume now.
And it all began when one day I randomly stopped watching YT content about Cinema like I usually did, because I didn't want to spoil those Movies and instead ones about Video Games I told myself I would never play any of anyway, I was just yearning for media analytical content to watch.
Little did I know that these YT essays and Videos would slowly convince me that the medium might actually be something for me and before I knew it I started stopping Videos not to spoil those games for me and even started searching out for ones that looked interesting to me.
In my early teens I became disinterested in Video Games and even looked down on them after witnessing a family member piss in bottles during 24/7 WOW sessions and rarely picked up the controller when friends played shit like COD or Fifa on their systems. Even back then I was kind of a little pretentious shit who was obsessed with all other art-forms, but didn't see anything in Video Games other than an expensive Toy I felt no desire to play with.
This here is kind of my History and a list of not necessarily just Games themselves, but also YouTube essays or videos about them that step by step helped me to give gaming a serious chance for the first time since my childhood and even further, helped me view them as a legitimate art-form. Since then, ca. 2017 early 2018, I binged played a shit ton of games and it became the main medium I consume now.
And it all began when one day I randomly stopped watching YT content about Cinema like I usually did, because I didn't want to spoil those Movies and instead ones about Video Games I told myself I would never play any of anyway, I was just yearning for media analytical content to watch.
Little did I know that these YT essays and Videos would slowly convince me that the medium might actually be something for me and before I knew it I started stopping Videos not to spoil those games for me and even started searching out for ones that looked interesting to me.
16 Games
The game that came with my PS4, which I mainly bought with the intention to watch stuff on it and maybe link up with my friends when none of us wanted to leave the house, which was before I learned you need to pay a monthly subscription to do that with most games, most of which also cost like 60 Euros. I felt kinda obligated to play Uncharted 4 and wouldn't complain about my time with it, although at the end of the day it is a glorified Ghost Train with some mediocre gun-play and "watch your dude climb shit" sections, but the variety and story telling made it decent enough.
Nothing that raised my Interest in gaming though. Just reminded me it can be a decent enough time and showed me how far the new generation has come compared to the PS2.
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Interested in Video Games barely existent
Nothing that raised my Interest in gaming though. Just reminded me it can be a decent enough time and showed me how far the new generation has come compared to the PS2.
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Interested in Video Games barely existent
Unironically. A late night smoke session, while watching Pyrocynical's Video on this made me kinda wanna play a Game which doesn't even exist. Yea, I also didn't know what ARGs were back then lol
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Interest in Video Games raised a tiny bit
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Interest in Video Games raised a tiny bit
Played the first few hours of this when i was a teenager after my then-GF showed it to me, but i just didn't really care for the medium enough to ever go back to it after that session.
Years later when I took my PS4 back from my siblings place, after I left it there, because I barely used it and I had some great memories of gaming with them as a kid, wanting to continue that tradition, I discovered that the game was installed on it.
Their partner used their account on my PS4. I had a vague memory of BioShock and felt like I could use that opportunity to play it again in full.
I had a great time and understood more about the mediums power of story telling and especially it's strength in Mise en Scène. It still felt very limited in its idea of player choice and the impact of it through the painfully obvious good or evil decision the player has to repeat a bunch of times with the little sisters dilemma.
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Interest in Video Games stepped up to "maybe they can do at least some things more interestingly than other art-forms"
Years later when I took my PS4 back from my siblings place, after I left it there, because I barely used it and I had some great memories of gaming with them as a kid, wanting to continue that tradition, I discovered that the game was installed on it.
Their partner used their account on my PS4. I had a vague memory of BioShock and felt like I could use that opportunity to play it again in full.
I had a great time and understood more about the mediums power of story telling and especially it's strength in Mise en Scène. It still felt very limited in its idea of player choice and the impact of it through the painfully obvious good or evil decision the player has to repeat a bunch of times with the little sisters dilemma.
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Interest in Video Games stepped up to "maybe they can do at least some things more interestingly than other art-forms"
Fucking early seasons of Fortnite with friends got me more than comfortable with a controller again(it's actually crazy what this game asks from you with it's building meachnics) for the first time since, and probably way better than then, my childhood. Watching some shitty content of it paired with the art-, cinema- and leftist essays in my YT-history got the algorithm to recommend me occasionally some great Video Game essays. It also made me check out all the other free-to-play games in the PlayStation store with my friends, as we grew tired of this game.
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Interest in Video Games miniscule, but I got more than familiar with the controls and design language
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Interest in Video Games miniscule, but I got more than familiar with the controls and design language
Joseph Anderson's essay "The Witness. a Great Game you should never play" is the perfect title for a Guy who didn't intend to ever get obsessed with this medium, but enjoys watching useless shit on YT.
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Interest in Video Games raised a tiny bit
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Interest in Video Games raised a tiny bit
Discovering a GDQ speedruns for this game sold me on Hitman and I bought it a few weeks later, after playing the Demo a couple of times, with a shopping mall gift card I had lying around. Probably the first Game I bought a physical copy of after buying a PS4 and some cheap games with it.
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Interest in Video Games raised enough to spend a gift card on one that I could have used for literally anything else
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Interest in Video Games raised enough to spend a gift card on one that I could have used for literally anything else
The GDC talk called "Practical Creativity" was probably the first one from that Channel that got recommended to me. I clicked on it without even knowing it was about Video Games and ended up taking notes and shit for my general interest in creating art, but the back of my mind knew where this behaviour was going.
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Interested in Video Games jumped up
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Interested in Video Games jumped up
Falling asleep to the white noise produced by Matthewmatosis Commentary or Lore videos of a game I had never played was comforting and I hope I forgot all of it when I am finally gonna play Dark Souls myself. Good thing I used to smoke enough weed back then to not remember where I just put my lighter a second ago.
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Interest in Video Games at observing the medium from a close distance
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Interest in Video Games at observing the medium from a close distance
Being the Art obsessed fuck that I am, out of curiosity I checked out the sister-site of RYM about Video Games and saw this near the top of the all-time best rated chart. It looked more intriguing than any Game I had seen before, so I bought it a week or so later.
It instantly changed my perspective on the medium as an art-form and playing it almost single handedly ignited a flame in me that I try to pour some gasoline into, with each new Game I am choosing to spend my time with, in the effort to keep it burning.
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Interest in Video Games shot to it's earliest peak
It instantly changed my perspective on the medium as an art-form and playing it almost single handedly ignited a flame in me that I try to pour some gasoline into, with each new Game I am choosing to spend my time with, in the effort to keep it burning.
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Interest in Video Games shot to it's earliest peak
When Hbomberguy's Video about this game dropped in 2019 it was probably the first real big one that made my ears perk up and rush to stop the Video after I knew I have to play it myself. Have only played the second instalment for now though, it was the only one available to me on the PS4 back when I watched this.
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Interest in Video Games intrigued enough to stop Videos about interesting looking ones now
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Interest in Video Games intrigued enough to stop Videos about interesting looking ones now
After a while of gaming mostly artsy shit, some classics and sifting through most of the interesting looking Indies on the then called PS Now service, my hungry for thoughtful stimulation pretentious ass typed into YT "Video Games are Art" and stumbled upon a Video by The Game Overanalyser called "Why Video Games are Art | The beauty of Play, and How 'Fun' is not the Opposite of Art" and it helped reaffirm my growing obsession with the medium as my new main interest
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Interest in Video Games solidified
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Interest in Video Games solidified
Getting some essays about this recommended that all started with a line akin to "Just talking about this Game is a spoiler, you can only experience it once. Go play it yourself and then come back" made me more than curious.
This Game once again changed my perspective on Video Games for the better and got me to prototype my own "you only gain knowledge as loot" narrative Puzzle game before it got to ambitious and I had to be realistic and shelve that idea, for now at least lol. I also think it's the game I watched the most play-throughs of after the fact to try and re-experience it's magic and learn from its brilliant design even better that way. With DE this is also the one I showed most of my friends, again, to relive it and try and explain my obsessions with this medium to them.
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Interest in Video Games shot to the moon
This Game once again changed my perspective on Video Games for the better and got me to prototype my own "you only gain knowledge as loot" narrative Puzzle game before it got to ambitious and I had to be realistic and shelve that idea, for now at least lol. I also think it's the game I watched the most play-throughs of after the fact to try and re-experience it's magic and learn from its brilliant design even better that way. With DE this is also the one I showed most of my friends, again, to relive it and try and explain my obsessions with this medium to them.
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Interest in Video Games shot to the moon
Jacob Geller's "Who's afraid of Modern Art: Vandalism, Video Games and Fascism" made leap straight to itch.io having only played a handful of classics
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Interest in Video Games raised to "We skipping directly to Deep Cuts"
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Interest in Video Games raised to "We skipping directly to Deep Cuts"
This was first game that I played on Itch and it immediately changed my understanding of what a Video Game could even be. How simple it is in concept and execution, yet still able to make me feel more than most of the others.
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Interest in Games shot to "Maybe I could make this myself"
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Interest in Games shot to "Maybe I could make this myself"
I dont even remember which Video I started with, but binging the Miziziz YT channel got me to note to myself to download Godot as soon as my Laptop would work again.
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Interest in Video Games raised to "I fucking want to make them myself"
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Interest in Video Games raised to "I fucking want to make them myself"
This one put the nail in the coffin.
It fucking got me to try and learn programming the hard way, before I realised I am way too dumb and should stick to an engine at the least.
I won't try to reduce it here, I have a half finished "review" in my notes app for months now, but no words I know or try to string together seem to be good enough to convey what Rain World made me feel.
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Interest in Video Games reached its ascension
It fucking got me to try and learn programming the hard way, before I realised I am way too dumb and should stick to an engine at the least.
I won't try to reduce it here, I have a half finished "review" in my notes app for months now, but no words I know or try to string together seem to be good enough to convey what Rain World made me feel.
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Interest in Video Games reached its ascension