WEEEEEEEEEELT YAAAAAAAAAANG I WANT YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

Update: I have gotten mr Yang I am incredibly happy ty mihoyo ty ccp
Update: This shit blows
Update: I got Acheron I need to finish Xianzhou Luofu I NEED AVENTURINE LIKE I NEED CRACK
Update: I finished 2.1 it was awesome I trust the plan I want my pookiebear aventurine

Alas, people won't make all the right choices in their lifetime... Though luck always seems like it's on your side.

You will keep winning, having never lost before. But why you? Why... must it be you?

If all your luck is built on the pain of someone you love, on the loss of dozens more - if these windfalls, these jackpots aren't a gift from Gaiathra- if all they are is a long string of meaningless deaths...

Chock full of all the growing pains and nagging annoyances of both the title that preceded it as well as that of the open world genre at large, DDII offers a satisfying moment to moment exploration experience and a fulfilling conclusion only earnt after a poorly structured main story quest. Familiar narrative elements line your path like markers illuminating the way forward as this title exists as a simultaneous remake and sequel; there is a Dragon who threatens a far away kingdom, there is an Arisen who must rise to His challenge, and there is a Pawn conjured of pure thought at their side, all as the infernal chain demands of this world. The unique roleplaying capabilities the Arisen storytelling model provides remains a captivating experience just as it did in the first entry, further explored with the underdog nature of this iteration's Arisen and their place of weakness as a victim of stolen valour, and once again the dynamic between master and Pawn invite many interpretations to the nature of their relationship beyond surface level character customisations available ingame.

A reader would note I place a lot of bearing on the narrative of the Dogma titles and it's because I see it as their strength, there's little I can constructively say about the vocation-based combat that hasn't already been said by those better written than I. Of course all games which allow character customisation to some capacity leave wriggle room for roleplay on the player's part, to explore regarding individual reactions to events and splinter canons or endings, and the Arisen/Pawn dynamic illustrates this potential stronger than other titles. It is purely because of DD's vagueities and space between major quests (especially utilising the breathing room of methodical travel) that allows one to fill in their own blanks and organically develop characteristics through gameplay.

I acknowledge mine is a special case as my sentimental tie to DD extends beyond mere rose tinted glasses or nostalgia. My family was homeless and hotel/sharehouse-hopping for an extended length of time during my teenage formative years, a period hazy even to myself as I still underestimate its effects on my current personhood and mental condition. It was a special and difficult circumstance in which my brother and I kept our heads down while my mother worked the hardest years in her life, and the video games I had the opportunity to play during this period endure as those closest to me: NieR, Xenoblade Chronicles, and Dragon's Dogma. The destined heroism of the Arisen and having their fate so clearly etched into the very order of reality proved an escape from my own unmoored existence, kicking off the most artistically inspired years of my time drawing and seeing the creation of numerous individual original characters all brought to life from the same narrative device, their scribbled intricacies lost to sketchbooks long gone. DD was so much more than just a jank open world game to me then, it was where I first explored my own transgenderism without a prior outlet and where I could receive acknowledgement of my being alive from strangers across the Pawn network. I was here and existed, and I could aid others even if in an insignificant way.

I've yet to see a similar burst of unabashed creativity following this period not even seen during my exploration of FFXIV character development, and while DDII couldn't possibly foster a child's productivity in me, I feel the inkling of potential within once again. Yeah that one Nadinia quest bothered me, yes the pacing felt really off at times, yes the loss gauge is abysmally unfair, but it's more Dragon's Dogma. How could I not love it? Thank you to my partner for allowing me to use his PC with far better specifications than mine.

For starters, I was not expecting myself to have binge this game so soon after buying the game.

FF7 was not the first game I was originally intending to play in this series but I couldn't help still wanting to play it due to recommendations from friends and as rebirth has just came out.

What I hadn't expect though was a story, so entrenched in so many ideas that I think it reasons that it stands the test of time. From the beginning, insinuating a anti-corporation stance with Barret and Avalanche, it truly immerses you to midgar.

What this game does with it's protagonist has to be one of the most touching story I've seen in gaming. Cloud's character paved the way for a lot of my favourite characters in some shape or form, but that's not even the full brunt on what makes me appreciate him. His inspirations and insecurities are at the heart of the story. They somehow managed to trick me multiple times in terms of reveals that one its all said and done, it does so in such a profound and human way.

It feels like a triumph in storytelling and video games and I'm genuinely happy I got to experience this classic to it's fullest.

This game leaves me feeling very strange. It nails so much of what makes a Final Fantasy game or even a good RPG special: a colorful and fleshed out cast of characters, engaging and customizable combat mechanics that make use of a whole party, and a lot of fun side content including probably the best card game in the series. This comes with a big drawback, which is that it’s still an incomplete remake of an existing game.
Rebirth is a much bigger game than the original FFVII, and with the amount of time you’ll spend playing it you’ll experience many more moments of characterization with the game’s cast. This is where it improves greatly on the original game’s biggest weakness, and I’d also argue an improvement from Remake when it comes to integrating these into the plot—which is admittedly more loose than it was in Midgar.
While the size of the game does indeed add a lot to the player’s experience in that regard, it’s also the reason why I’m unlikely to replay it. The story beats are still very similar to that of the original game’s, and many of them are tonally undercut by either the game’s more over the top presentation or newer elements added in. In all honesty I was kind of expecting more to have changed this time around, but like Remake it followed much of the same plot as the original but with a few adaptational differences. The distinctly new material makes up a very small amount of this game’s story, and still leaves the player with a lot of questions—putting the pressure on part 3 to deliver.
All in all, this is a very good game, and a worthwhile experience for anyone who wants more of Final Fantasy VII’s world and cast. I do also think it’s interesting to see how sensibilities have changed since the original game was made, and the decisions that Square makes when telling a story from 1997 to today’s audience with far more resources available to them. But there’s this nagging in my head that tells me they could have also made something more worthwhile if they’d taken everything that made this game great and channeled it into an entirely new Final Fantasy game instead.

"That brief hesitation was all it took to spawn a great evil. It crawled through the fields, ran through the hills, and spread disaster in the skies above. Book of Ezer, Verse 2, 'Disaster Unleashed.'"

An epilogue to a finale. The bridge which leads to the next story arc for this legendary series as well as one that is filled with context of the past, present, and future of this story.

Trails in the Sky the 3rd is massively different from its predecessors and ones that follow it. A dungeon crawler with Visual Novelesque side stories that are apart of its own door system. There is a requirement for every door and whoever fulfills it gets granted a flashback to the past. On how this is handled it is easily one of the best side story concepts I have seen in a video game. I am definitely going to miss doors like Moon Door 4, Star Door 8, and Star Door 15. Obviously there are more but those are ones that stood out to me or are the most memorable.

Although I have seen people who dislike the gameplay in this game, I personally love it. I think it was a very different change of pace considering how you're done with Estelle and Joshua's magnificent journey, and Kevin motherfuckin Graham takes over.

Kevin Graham's story is something that will stick with me for a LONG time. I thought Estelle would never be topped or let alone matched when it comes to a main character standpoint in this series and it did not take long for my expectations to be shattered. Now I don't know where I stand in the comparison between the two, but I can confidently say I love them both.

The soundtrack is somehow on par or arguably better than the last. I really don't know how this is even possible but man it is something special. When I first started the game and this track was the first thing I heard I knew we were in for something special.

Unlike SC, this game had me invested from beginning to end. There were several times where I just audibly said "wow." At this point I can just say that this is one of the best video game trilogies ever. Like each game of this trilogy just sets a high bar for the rest of the genre after experiencing it.

The Trails in the Sky trilogy has truly been an emotional and special journey and I just can't wait what future games has in store waiting for me.

Lastly although I was absolutely loving this game while playing, there was a line by Kevin himself that really stuck with me and solidified this game as an all timer.

"It's why it gave me the strength to move forward, even knowing how many hardships awaited. Because for every hardship, there'll be just as much joy waiting for me."

The phrase “x story helped me out during a rough time” is used commonly to elaborate on how much a piece of media has helped someone out, but I can’t say that about Persona 3, primarily because it’s a story that has taken root inside me deeply and stayed with me throughout the years ever since 2021 when I first played it. It’s not like it helped me during a single rough time, it was more like an affirmative embrace and an acknowledgement of my struggles throughout all of these years collectively instead of just one period of time. Persona 3, much like Good Will Hunting, Evangelion, and Pandora Hearts, is a game that I like to revisit and reflect upon every time I feel like I’m in a rut and can’t figure out who I am and what am I supposed to do in this world. It’s something I’ve closely attached to who I am because of how much it shaped my mindsets towards life, “The meaning of our lives is something that we make but don’t see”, and, “You don’t need to save the world to find meaning in life” are quotes I internalised, reminded myself of anytime I felt myself falling down an existential crisis, and the long term effects it had on me throughout the years is not something I take for granted. In a way, Persona 3 is a symbol of my struggles during my adolescence, and so, it is that revisiting it through Reload that I felt like I was looking back on parts of myself from back then and getting in-touch with them again. It felt like a reflection of my past, of all the struggles I pushed through to make it this far to where I am today, and by the end of it, I realised that much of my own growth throughout the years was because of stories like Persona 3, growth due to me burning my dread and venturing in life while living in the moment.


When you’re faced with a crisis that you have no idea how will it end, or how you will resolve it, you have two choices, whether to believe that you’ll fail and fall into a hole of cynicism or to believe in your happiness and work towards that ideal in the moment by focusing on yourself and doing what you can until eventually, everything falls into place. This sentiment seemed too unreal to me because of how clouded my vision was with all of the negativity that I surrounded myself with back in 2020 because whenever I tried to resolve my issues, I half assed it and it backfired, whether it be my existential crisis due to the societal pressure I experienced that made me feel like I had to have a larger than life success story to be worth anything, my ever growing disdain towards the fleeting nature of bonds, struggles with navigating interpersonal issues due to my self pity and cynicism as a byproduct of my fear of abandonment, and fear of death due to religious doubts I had. All of this was too much for my 17 year old self to bear, but as I said, Persona 3 and its characters all reflected different intimate parts of who I am for a reason.


For a dumb teenager like me who couldn’t believe in himself, drowned in self pity and inferiority towards others, and had trouble seeing what was so special about myself, Junpei Iori represented my struggles with the indifference of the universe crucially. He’s someone who believes his own hype to subconsciously convince himself that he’s a hero destined to save everyone, when in reality that’s merely his coping mechanism with his deep-seated insecurity about his incompetence, and that shows in the dichotomy of his goofiness and feelings of envy and jealousy. It’s only later through meeting Chidori, someone who felt like her life held meaning due to her persona, much like he did, that he realized that he doesn’t need to be this impossible image of a hero that he created within himself and that if he kept on being true to his innermost self, the one who wanted to become a baseball player, he’ll have already become a hero to someone, like he did with Chidori. I said that Junpei’s insecurities and tendency to compare himself to others reflects a part of me in the past, but truth be told, I still have those tendencies lingering in from within me, yet in the same vein, over time I’ve learned to trust in myself, that whatever I do, it’ll result in something special. I learned that it doesn’t matter if there’s someone who’s better, smarter, more insightful than me, because no matter what, they can never be me, and so long as I pursue that self and see to it that its potential is met, everything will fall into place. It’s for that reason that I can look back on Junpei’s arc in P3 fondly and think to myself about how much it helped me internalise that self trust, because there’s nothing more real than pulling a mentally ill goth bad bitch by being funny and quirky.



When I said that P3 reflects different parts of myself from the past, I meant that because it’s not just my teenage years that it reflected but my childhood as well with characters like Ken. I could go into how characters like Mitsuru, Akihiko, Shinjiro, & Fuuka connected with me but I want to go with Ken not just because he’s my favorite among the aforementioned characters (I’m quirky, I know) but because of how he crucially reflected a part of me that no other character has, and it’s how Ken chooses to adapt to his situation to fit in in self deriding ways that I feel seen by. From the start, Ken is pushed into this dog-eat-dog world where only the strong survive, even in SEES, and that sudden change in his environment not only made him lose himself but a person’s most precious value, that being his inner child. Ken was forced to let go of his childish nature, gaslight himself into thinking that such notions would only hold him back, and proceeded to move solely through objective means because of how he was stuck in an adult world where if he doesn’t man up and throw away his childish needs and struggles, he’d be left behind, much like how his mother left him behind and so did everyone else, with their looks that were devoid of nothing but pity, yet even then, in his linked episodes, he couldn’t let go of his inner child and it shows sprinkles of his inner child peeking out due to his enthusiasm. It’s a heartbreaking accurate depiction of how much Ken struggles to connect with others and most importantly himself, because nothing has been the same for him since his Mom died. Many people, when looking at Ken’s character, view Ken’s arc as a revenge arc, and while that’s a valid reading of his character, to me, it felt like it was more so Ken reconnecting with his inner child, realising that he doesn’t need to put up this facade to “survive” and “fit in” with this cruel world, and that he doesn’t need to hold himself back emotionally so much because of others anymore, because while he may have lost his family, he gained another through SEES, and that’s what “living” means. Losing people, meeting new people, bonding with them, and doing simple things like practicing your hobbies, that’s what living really means, and that meant so much to me because back when I was a kid, I never had any friends of my own, could never really connect with them, and that’s because I always hung out with my older brother’s friends, which subsequently made me mature too fast for my good and didn’t allow me to live my childhood to its fullest. I could never connect with people my age, because I was so used to forcibly maturing myself to keep up with my older friends, I always felt like bottling up my emotions and needs in favor of a facade that could get me the closeness and sense of belonging I wanted out of their company since I was too awkward to make any friends of my own, yet on the inside I was too young and emotional to get along with my older friends, creating this unstable interpersonal problem I had that plagued my childhood. It’s funny, how I’m a grown person now, yet seeing Ken be plagued with this same issue I had and recovering from it through mundane means, almost had me tearing up because it reminded me of how much I hardened myself and designed a strong man to protect the hurting child inside me.




Earlier, I described Persona 3 as a meditative experience that gives me space for my feelings whenever I need a haven to express myself within, or feel seen within, and so, there are parts of it that are timeless to me, parts of it that help me see myself in a better light and enable me to look at myself more positively, one such part is Yukari’s character and how much of an embrace it feels to me. Truthfully speaking, my aim with my media experiences is to either escape the real world, or for edutainment purposes, but it is so rare for me to engage myself with a story that can help me discover positive, strong traits within my character that makes me love myself. It’s hard for a story to do that, since what I look for in fictional characters are parts of me that I and others around me struggle to accept, more often than not are negative parts, but that’s why Yukari means the world to me, since not only does her character give me a safe space to feel seen and accepted for my contradictory feelings of love and hate towards intimacy, but she also embodies a trait of mine that helps me accept it, that being kindness and empathy. Yukari’s premise is that she struggles with the internal conflict known as the hedgehog dilemma, where she craves intimacy but disdains contact with others, because she wants to be loved, but doesn't think she's worth loving because of the self pity, sense of weakness/inferiority, & self hatred she internalised as a byproduct of being "abandoned" by both of her parents, at least emotionally. I say emotionally because her dad died so he didn’t abandon her technically, and her mother simply clung to other men for emotional support, so she didn’t consciously abandon Yukari, but at least on an emotional level, Yukari felt like she had the deepest craving she had was taken away from her, forever a wish beyond her reach, and that affected how she perceived herself and others and based her moral compass around her disdain for her Mother who abandoned her and what she represents. Following that, Yukari would disassociate with anything that resembled the escapist coping mechanisms her Mother did through either self-denial or self-isolation from others. It’s why she despises being helped out, because not only does she blame and hate herself for what happened to her parents but because it resembles her Mother’s helpless state of feeling like she needs to be saved, it’s why she was mad when Makoto helped her out during her s. Link, it’s why she tries to present herself as this being who towers above the concept of weakness to feel a sense of leverage and derive self-worth from that, but at the same time, she’s a highly emotional person who wears their heart on their sleeve, and so bits and pieces of that need for emotional support and insecurities about her self image come out. An example of this would be her jealousy and fixation over Mitsuru, she’s so fixated on Mitsuru because deep down, she wants to be like her, someone who’s unfazed, looks powerful and is the exact opposite of her Mother. A toxic sense of admiration, you could call it, since she never recognizes this jealousy, how wrong it is since even Mitsuru’s flawless demeanor was fake and a byproduct of societal expectations, and how much it contradicts Yukari’s conscious desire to present herself powerfully, and whenever she recognizes that, it’s in self-loathing, like how she did in Yakushima, because of how much she gaslights herself into thinking that she’s strong and doesn’t need help, even if it means ignoring herself and wrongly seeing others. Despite those insecurities getting in the way of how she interacts with others, she's a very kind person who has all the love to give to others, yet when it comes to loving herself, that ''love'' she has for others is devoid of any love for herself. Time and time again, in various instances Yukari shows how much empathy and kindness she has for others, even from the start of the game, like how she was the first SEES member who bothered to reach out to Makoto and connect with him instead of spying on him, how she was the first to defend Makoto when Junpei lashed out at him, how she made insensitive jokes about Junpei but then apologized to him and considered his feelings, or with how she helped other SEES members navigate their problems like Fuuka who struggled with people pleasing habits during her final s. link and Mitsuru who struggled with self-acceptance and existential dread. Additionally, if you spend enough time with her during the night events, there's a moment where she talks about how inspiring the main female character is, how she wants to be just like her, someone who's there for everyone around her and is capable, and that puts into perspective how kind Yukari is and how much she empathizes with others. Yet, she has moments where she’s a tease and makes fun of others, sometimes in a tone-deaf way, and why is that? The majority would chalk it up to her being a quirky mean white girl, and while I get it and understand how appealing that is since I’d love for a pretty white girl like her to call me racial slurs and deride me my right to live, I think that Yukari’s need to prove her toxic self image right to justify her self hate and rejection of help to disassociate from her Mom is what causes her to be such a tease and to be so slanderous, because while she's quirky and mean in her own right, it's also valid to infer that about her character. It doesn't help that being bullied due to her father's failure influenced her perception of social interaction more aggressively and might've added to that if anything. In a sense, she has the most amount of kindness out of anyone, but the dichotomy she has where she pushes everyone away while craving their love and attention, is what clouds that trait of hers and makes it harder for her to express that, and it's why whenever she gets praised for her kindness, she denies it. She's a perfect example of how someone's personality can be so dynamic, where she's a mean teaser on the outside, but would be the quickest to be there for someone else, and that part of her helps me embrace the idea that I'm a kind person, or at least, try to be because I'm similar to that aspect of her and it feels very validating. It's especially relatable because there are moments where I went out of line and lost friendships due to that, due to unhealthy tendencies and mindsets I had, and that made me reject my kindness in favor of self-loathing, yet through Yukari, I was able to see that part of me, admit to it, and love myself more authentically because of it.


By now you understand how much Persona 3 means to me, how much of a solace inducing experience it is for me, and how much it helps me to love, to feel loved, to express my earnest desires, and to be there for everyone around me, but in contrast, oddly enough, when I was playing through Reload, a certain part of it re-stimulated my fear of abandonment, my disdain for the fleeting nature of relationships due to past experiences, and my desire for everything to stay the same way, thinking about how worthless something is if it’s destined to never last, that certain part being the front and center of the game, Aegis. A few years ago, during the pandemic, I’d say I was at my worst mentally, and it’s not because of the experiences I went through by that point, but it was more so because of how I dealt with those experiences by willingly surrounding myself with negativity, choosing to be miserable instead of fighting, and preferring victimhood over the pursuit of happiness. It led to loads of perceptual issues I had, and that only piled up more on the issues I already struggled with at the time. You see, I grew up in an environment that shunned sensitivity and emotions and saw them as a sign of weakness, and so, a feminine guy like me who was highly emotional and sensitive, was essentially born and raised in the wrong environment because of how much that aspect of it contradicted how I was at my innermost core. In an attempt to fit in, I discarded myself, drowned myself in an endless hell of facades, and over time, forgot who I even was, becoming something of a colorless broken puppet unable to discern my emotions and convey them, forever emotionally stunted and ignorant of how it feels to “live” because all I did was exist. For that reason I’ve had my complications with loneliness and love, feeling like I couldn’t feel it or even deserved it. So, it is that through Aegis I was able to see a picture of my past self, a grotesque portrait of how I was 4 years ago. It was as eerie as it was comfortable, seeing a character frustratingly and confusingly try to navigate their place in the world and getting shredded by it. It felt validating, because Aegis had the same misconception that I did, and it was that I thought I had to do something larger than life itself to justify my existence when that wasn’t the case. It was very comforting for me to see a character that represents how I was a few years ago, that’s how it was at first anyway. It later dawned on me that after Aegis decided to live, she started struggling with something that I struggle with nowadays, and it’s maintaining relationships, or rather, thinking that they’re worth maintaining anyway since they all end. I’ve always had this thought that yeah, sure, all bonds end, that this is an absolute, but it always pained me whenever I met someone, because I knew deep down, that at some point they’re going to leave me behind and we’ll part ways. Even if we reconnect, it might not even be the same as before and that made me oftentimes crave a reality where time could be halted. But upon revisiting Aegis’ social link, there’s a piece of dialogue that reminded me why I cherish the people I cherish and why I’ll never stop loving the people I’m with.

“Life is both short and finite. That’s what makes it so invaluable, and why one feels that it must be cherished… When you think about it, it’s a miracle that two given people are able to ever meet in this chaotic flow of time and space.”


It’s a simple line, something that’s hard to miss, but that's the case with most ideas in life and is what makes it connect with me because of how Makoto’s dynamic with Aegis resonates with that sentiment and embodies it with the stark contrast of how they live. Their differences made them feel complete because, on the two opposite spectrums, they struggled to understand life and the worth of the process that goes within it that inevitably leads to death, yet through something simple, like knowing and understanding each others' emptiness, they felt the elusive taste of connection and yearned for more from it. Makoto is a human who tries to be a machine, while Aegis is a machine who tries to be human, yet despite their differences, they connected because they both yearn for the same thing, to stand with one another atop Gekoukan’s rooftop and gaze at the city that gave them a taste of that elusive connection. The shortage of something is what makes you fear losing it. Yet, in the same vein, it makes you want to appreciate it and make use of it to the fullest so that when it ends, you can look back on it with no regrets and cherish your memories of it because it’s the memories that make our experiences with one another flow through all eternity. And so, even if I fear losing the ones I love, even if I lived a life of an emotionally stunted puppet, even if I lived in existential dread, even if I thought at times that I didn’t deserve to be liked, or that I was of less worth than others, none of that matters, because regardless of what happens, I’m human, I have feelings worth conveying, I will always have people I love, and I have something to live for, it may not be monumental, but the small ripples caused by the day to day things I do will surely produce a result worth living for in the long run because no two days are the same. It’s funny, I talked about my time during the pandemic as the worst time in my life, yet when I look back on it, I can’t look at those days as an unhappy time. To me, they’re a sign that I’m alive, a backdrop for me to push forward from, a pat on the back telling me how much I’ve changed, and a signal to dash forward and follow my heart, because I now know that rejecting it is the most painful of all. Maybe that’s how I feel about them because over time, I’ve slowly subconsciously implemented the feelings and lessons that Persona 3 made me feel and taught me into my day-to-day life, and now looking back on it, after everything has been said and done, I feel nothing but pride and love towards who I became and who I was. Through remembering my mortality, I remembered to live, and so I did.

I don't know how to start this. But I will say this took WAY longer than I expected it would take me.

After finishing FC I pretty much just kept on going at the pace I was at since I got to chapter 3 or so. SC prologue really tugs the heartstrings after the ending of FC and you just NEED answers man. Then after that the game really gets... repetitive.

The time period from when I completed the first half versus literally the rest of the game is INSANE. Took me about 2 months for the first half and the second half took me a business week. I don't mind the first half as I do think there were great moments interspersed. But god that was mind-numbing. Repeating the same sequences for a good portion of the game was a turn off. But don't let this fool you. The moment you get on The Glorious EVERYTHING changes.

The story picks up tremendously and it just builds and builds until the finale.
This is when I started to realize "yea this may be one of the greatest video games ever made."

The Legend of Heroes: Trails in the Sky SC is the definition of a sequel in every sense of the word. Every facet gets improved. And the stakes are higher than the last. This was essentially a 70 hour long JRPG finale. And I love it for everything it stands for.

This may sound conflicting as you have two opposing opinions for each half but let me assure you that the highest of highs overshadows the lowest of lows.

Trails in the Sky SC is truly one of the best JRPG games there is and even with its flawed and monotonous first half, on the other hand you have one of the most legendary second halves to a video game. In the end I will cherish it all the same.

Oh and this soundtrack is cool.