The fuck?


So this is barely even a Donkey Kong game, there’s no platforming or Mario whatsoever, you just play as this kid just spraying DK a bunch, it’s like pathetically easy as well.


Well that was shit……….but at least now I get to play Donkey Kong Country, an actual game that’ll last longer than ten minutes.

I’m almost done (two more levels and the final boss), and it’s a pretty damn great game


Fuck getting 100% though


Edit: Beat it!

A link to the past, third game in the Zelda series, and much like their other franchises third games, they fucking knocked out of the park


A link to the past truly builds on everything that made the original great, the world is a lot more developed and nuanced than the original, filled with much more life and characters
It’s not just the world, the story has been improved immensely, immediately starting off with a darker beginning that immediately gets you invested, something the original never really had.
Gameplay and general exploring have been greatly polished and dungeons are far more complex than the original game, I love especially how the game builds on the challenge of the dungeons as the game goes on, making more use of skills and items you have, speaking of that.
This is also the game that established many iconic Zelda things, like the hookshot, the pieces of heart, various items being used in dungeons, big keys, the sacred realm, many MANY enemies, and of course, the master sword, probably the most iconic sword in gaming history.
The bosses in this game I have a little less praise to give, while most of them are good, they do suffer from being pretty simple, like the ice palace boss in which you just melt the ice its in and then just smack it till the three cloud things die, or the boss in misery mire where you can quite literally just stand still and smash B, or the moth boss which is just………fuck that boss, but aside from those examples everything else is great, we especially have to thank this game for giving us the first proper Ganon fight, original one wasn’t anything special but this one knocks it out of the park and is a phenomenal way to end the game, and it’s the first of many phenomenal Ganon fights to come.
One last thing, I love many SNES game graphics and this game is no exception, it’s a beautiful looking game, manages to look comparable to modern Zelda while keeping the classic look as well (something many SNES games do)

The most incredible thing about this game is how it’s still able to stand out despite many titles in the future coming and improving a lot of things, it’s a phenomenal classic adventure and the greatest starting point for anyone who hasn’t played this franchise, and for anyone who has played the rest and hasn’t played this, tf you doing? PLAY THE GAME



And the next Zelda game is Link’s Awakening, I’m gonna be playing the 2019 remake, why? Idk, I like the music and graphical style more I guess……………it’s weird how they haven’t remade the original 2 Zelda games

Link’s Awakening, a very odd game in the series even to this day.

After a link to the past basically established a lot of what the zelda series is, link’s awakening stripped a lot of it back, it kept the gameplay and many items, but there was no Ganon, no hyrule, no triforce, and not even the titular character herself.
With that said, link’s awakening is a phenomenal game, and here’s why.


Everything a link to the past did to improve the gameplay is still very much present here, with excellent use of items throughout the game, even more greatly improved dungeons, and a bunch of wacky and fun characters.
Speaking of those characters, they went all out with this one, a lot of strange npcs litter this island, like that thing from super Mario bros 2, the crocodile that eats dog food, the shopkeeper that fucking kills you if you steal something, the owl that’s just constantly appearing for like 90% of the game, fucking Mario enemies, and the telephone guy who knows more about your adventure than you do and should probably be helping you more actively than just calling you.
There’s also normal people in this game like uh………Marin, she’s a pretty great character, I just wished she was in more of the game.

I think undeniably the greatest thing about this game is its story, you start off stranded on a beach, then link is guided to get all these instruments to awaken a fish in a giant egg, from the moment you start everything seems just dreamlike, Mario enemies appearing left and right, the many strange characters, even the fact that the bosses are referred to as nightmares, it all builds up until you get to the southern shrine, which reveals the big twist, you and this island are all apart of the wind fish’s dream, and while waking up the wind fish will let you leave, the island will disappear with it.
This twist genuinely makes this game one of the darkest games in the series, knowing that all these characters will cease to exist if you wake the wind fish really just discourages you from wanting to complete your journey, after all, you’ll lose all these zany characters you meet with, it’s especially when it comes to Marin towards the end of the game, she says stuff like “when you leave, please don’t forget me”, listening to the ballad of the wind fish lyrics that Nintendo made when the remake came out makes it even darker.
But at the end of the day, you gotta wake up from the dream eventually, and move on, when you finally wake up the wind fish, the island disappears along with everyone in it, you may have lost these friends but you’ll always have the memory of them, which hey, that makes them real enough.
Oh and if you don’t die once in the game, Marin lives on as a seagull, her one wish being fulfilled, adding just a tiny bit of sweetness to an ultimately more bitter ending.


Link’s Awakening is a great game, with the way its story is told, it truly makes it one of the most memorable Zelda game simply because of how well it stands out, I highly recommend it.



Next game is Ocarina of Time, I haven’t played this bad boy in years, and this’ll be my first time playing the N64 original (I’ve always played the 3DS one), and I’m excited to finally revisit it.

Holy shit


After the nightmare of the caves in Pikmin 2, Pikmin 3 is such a breath of fresh air, it took nine years for this game to come out and man it shows.
Pikmin 3 basically improves on almost everything from the previous 2 games, ok yeah some small things the first two games did better, like the story and the characters I liked better in first two……….that’s about it.
Can I just say, the new Pikmin they added are excellent, I didn’t much care for the white and purple Pikmin in Pikmin 2, but I adore the rock and flying Pikmin in this game, they feel much more well rounded and are used more throughout the game, in fact unlike Pikmin 2 where a lot of things could be made obsolete by the purple Pikmin, in this game everything is balanced, rock Pikmin are powerful but they can’t latch onto things, and flying Pikmin can more easily traverse areas but are weak in combat, the balance here is wonderful.
Speaking of combat, it’s been greatly improved here, the lock on is nice and in general you have more control over your Pikmin, there’s a few new enemies to face off against, but what I really want to talk about are the bosses, holy fuck.
These bosses are great, the sheer scale and size of all of them makes the battles feel far more impactful, the first fight with the armored worm thing is so nice, the bat thing in the cave is admittedly pretty easy but also fun, the sandworm thing is a great use of area effects with the constantly changing terrain and it’s satisfying to see this thing launch out of the ground after hitting it enough, the flying bug thing is neat, the fucking plant rock boss in the mud is just gargantuan, like holy shit, I was taken aback by it, and then there’s the plasm wraith, I’ll get to this boss in a bit though.
Oh my god, can I just please talk about the graphics man, they’re fucking beautiful, the first two games look good but oh my goodness, this is next level shit, the way everything looks just immerses you more into the world, which just makes it even better.
I also did both of Olimar’s side adventures, these were pretty neat, Olimar’s assignment was a nice short and simple way of showing us how Olimar explored the planet and ended up getting captured by the Plasm Wraith, and Olimar’s comeback is a nice epilogue to close out the game on.
Before I move on to the final part, let me address my two problems with this game, 1. It’s a little too easy, I mean I know I complained about 2 being hard as shit, but like that was just bullshit difficulty with all the bombs and rocks falling from the ceiling, here though, man it’s just way too easy, even the bosses go down quick (plasm wraith being an exception of course), and this leads to my other problem, 2. The game is very short, it took me like maybe 4-5 hours to beat the main stuff, maybe an extra hour or two for the missing fruit I collected and the Olimar stuff, but it’s just short man, though I guess I prefer the short and sweet route compared to the overstays its welcome route (looking at you Pikmin 2).

Now, the final level, the formidable oak, easily the best part of the game and maybe the whole series, it blends everything we love about Pikmin perfectly together, it takes some of the good elements of the caves in Pikmin 2 like the multiple layers, but adds a lot more atmosphere here, the plasm wraith feels like an excellent upgrade from the water wraith, the puzzles are more complex than some of the ones seen before, it utilizes the three captains really well, it’s long enough to be challenging but doesn’t overstay its welcome, and it all caps off with a fantastic final boss, much like the titan dweevil, it uses all elements to combat you, but adds a twist with the whole bringing down the wraith into pieces and destroying the individual pieces, also electricity doesn’t insta kill every non yellow Pikmin in the game, so that’s a plus, made the titan dweevil fight very annoying.
After all that, you get a nice ending cutscene with Olimar thanking you for rescuing him, you leave as the plasm wraith screams at your ship, and that ends Pikmin 3………(also earlier there’s an extremely funny cutscene where Louie jumps out of your ship, steals all your food supply, runs offscreen, and fucking explodes, it’s so funny man).


So yeah, that’s Pikmin 3, an excellent adventure that just improves on everything the series has done, and it’s easily one of Nintendo’s best games, if Pikmin 4 can top this game, then holy fuck we’re in for something truly special.
Now one last thing before I finish this review off, I played this game once back in 2020 when it first came out on switch, and it’s weird cause I did not remember a fucking thing about the game when I replayed it this time, it’s kinda weird honestly, and since this basically a first playthrough for my brain, I’m just gonna put it on the 2023 list.


Now, we wait for Pikmin 4, just one more week and maybe the Pikmin subreddit will finally be normal again…………oh who am I kidding that place r/BatmanArkham on steroids.

Metroid Prime is a fucking phenomenal game


It’s every bit as tense and mysterious as the other metroids, but now in the whole new dimensions of 3D, while overall the action aspect isn’t as commonly seen like it was in most of the 2D games, it’s balanced out with some of the absolute best atmosphere, exploration, and puzzle solving I’ve ever seen in any video game.
The game’s graphics are beautiful, incredible atmosphere in every area, the lush and beautiful rains of the Tallon Overworld, the rough archeological feel of the chozo ruins, the deep cave feel of magmoor, the beautiful snow terrain of phendrana, and the absolute mechanical desolate feel of the Phazon mines, all of it comes together to bring this game to life, and man does it stick with you, it’s all helped by the amazing soundtrack, bringing even more life to these already excellently crafted areas.
The game’s lore and story is also great, it starts off much like Super Metroid did with samus exploring an abandoned ship, encountering a horrifying situation, finding good ol ridley fucking around, and then ridley escapes and Samus follows him to the planet of Tallon IV, she loses Ridley and searches the planet for him, but eventually you get caught up in trying to discover what the hell happened to this planet, and the game doesn’t really tell you much directly, you gotta find out through exploring and scanning any pirate logs you may find, it’s an excellent way of storytelling, and one that can only be done with a video game.
Now while this game does have less action, that doesn’t mean there’s none here, when there is action it’s all excellently done, like the beginning of the game with the parasite Queen and the ship escape sequence, the plant boss thing, the multiple surprise ghost chozo attacks, Thardus, the Omega Pirate, the surprise Ridley attack, and the final boss itself, the titular Metroid Prime, the action is there when it needs to be, and the less of it there is, the more impactful the action moments do hit.
I just gotta say, one of my favorite moments in this game is just the entrance to phendrana, the music and atmosphere swells up, and it kinda has a cozy feel, a feeling that is lost as soon as you see the looming shadow of Ridley flying overhead later on in the area, I just love it.
While it is my favorite Metroid game, and one of my favorite games in general, this game does have a few issues, namely the backtracking which while I can mostly ignore in these games, this game does take it a little too far sometimes, and of course the big complaint, the chozo artifact hunt, it’s basically a less egregious version of the triforce hunt from wind waker, but it is still annoying, not as bad on replays but that first time definitely isn’t gonna be pretty for new players.


Overall though, despite its flaws, it’s a phenomenal adventure with truly breathtaking atmosphere, and it’s just an ultimate vibe.

Now normally I would say something like “now onto Metroid Prime 2” but uh, yeah I have no way to access Metroid Prime 2, now I’d say I would move on to Prime 3, I don’t have Prime 3 yet but I am getting it soon…………however, I did get another game, another Wii Metroid game, a very infamous one, it basically killed the franchise for 7 years after it came out.

Yep………Other M

I said it in my review of the first game, and I’ll say it again here



All the shit talking I have said to this game throughout these past two years………….I take all of it back

Game is a 10, don’t know what you mf’s don’t like about it


Aside from the imprisoned




Also Nintendo wtf, I may now love this game but $60 for a ten year old game? Really scummy