NO in-air karate kicks so I should rate it 1 star.

A very curious game, as I think it is far superior to almost every boomer shooter that isn't named Hedon, and is absolutely WITHOUT QUESTION worth your money more than a fucking randomly generated piece of shit, there is still a lot about Selaco that is keeping me from truly loving it like I feel like I should.

What I mentioned in my first little review of this game still stands: enough with the fucking internet memes. Not only is it fucking annoying and just completely takes you out of the world, it is also a bad idea from a technical standpoint. Games take forever to make, so when I see Freaking Hilarious memes like the "How Are Mirrors Real?" is going to require a history degree for anyone 19 or younger to get. It just reads as nonsensical if you don't understand the gag and just completely irritating to anyone who does. We should only thank our lucky stars that Dawn is a relatively quiet protagonist in comparison to the Bubsy levels of verbosity that Generic Female Protagonist of Ion Fury had. (Huge Feminism Win!! There are Generic FEMALE Protagonists now!!!)

Like, I'm sorry Selaco Dev Who Namesearches, I would have refunded this game on the spot when I saw Shit Pickle if I hadn't passed the refund threshold. You are VERY LUCKY that the game is extraordinarily compelling because this kind of shit is absolutely a deal-breaker for anyone committing the cardinal sin of trying to take your game world seriously.

It's worth taking seriously too!! Selaco is an astonishingly detailed game world, akin to someone's model train set they've laboriously set-up and are allowing us to peer into. These kinds of game worlds are my absolute favorite, as I am a diehard fan of the "root through other people's stuff" genre. Deus Ex, Unreal, Hedon, System Shock, Prey 2017: these games all revolutionized rooting through people's drawers and Selaco has established itself as an up-and-comer for the genre.

The feverish detail to the simulacrum is where I feel I got my money's worth: playing pool in an arcade, playing a "cookie clicker" knockoff on the menu screen, reading logs of day-to-day minutiae at a factory, the game has literally everything you could want from this style of game.

Bad news is whenever the combat would come and spoil all of my fun I would be sadly reminded of something that I've been forced to think about for years: There will NEVER be another FEAR.

It's not for lack of trying either: enemies have detailed voice chatter, will flank and flush you out, call out your health status and if they should retreat or try and rush you, it's all very detailed and expertly crafted. I just feel like we are missing some of the elements that made FEAR sing.

Honestly, those bland office corridors were one. Say what you will, but FEAR is one of the most readable shooters to have ever been made. Replicas stand out like sore thumbs amidst the backdrops of the grey and white office spaces so that you are never shooting at fuckin' nothing when the debris and dust start to fly. Selaco has a feature in the options to highlight enemies but I swear to God it does next to nothing. The blue sci-fi enemies blend into the blue sci-fi architecture believe if or not. Not only that, FEAR would also give you great vantage points before battles so you can choose where you enter combat from very carefully, whereas in Selaco I could never get the drop on enemies as they would use their Far Cry vision to spot me from between 2 crates a mile away while blending into the scenery.

If anything, I come away with a greater appreciation for how delicately constructed FEAR's arenas were! The level design in general is labyrinthine to a fault. If I closed the game and came back after a few hours I would have to reorient myself to the levels, as there are just no real landmarks or design traits to latch onto. Some of these Frankenstein Monster levels REALLY could have used some trimming down.

Also, not having slow-mo really feels like a huge missed opportunity. There are so many times I'd be sliding on the ground, blasting dudes away, and all I can think is how EXCITING all this destruction and chaos would be in slow-mo. It is really like a dev acutely aware of what would make the game even better and stubbornly NOT doing it for some reason. FEAR and Max Payne 2 haven't been topped! You could have been the guy!!

The destruction during gun fights is really a thing of beauty though. This game is a technical marvel, just a beautiful construction of almost every element I could like in a shooter, just not married in a way that I will abide. Such as the guns, which I found to be a really uneven arsenal. The plasma gun, pistol, and SMG all feel great, but I just don't like this shotgun or assault rifle. The assault rifle might be one of the most useless pieces of shit I've ever used in a shooter. An incredibly inaccurate gun that hands out tickles to the enemies, there was never a scenario I wanted to fall back on it. The sniper rifle I found just fucking useless as enemies swarm and flank and kick up so much dust and debris that you can't even SEE shit. The grenade launcher I was not a fan of UNTIL I converted it into a rocket launcher, when it became the best gun of all time.

Also stop giving me your worthless fucking landmine grenades game!!!

I have to say though, and I'm really sorry to: I am so sick of sprites. I want to shoot a nice meaty 3d model that turns into red mist. The alien blood and sprite gore is what it is. The game is running on GZ Doom and is already technical wizardry, but God I Want To Shoot Someone So Bad!!!

Personally, I definitely have gotten my money's worth from Selaco. It is incredibly rewarding to explore all of its secrets, it's beautifully realized and technically stunning, and I found a lot of the flavor text to actually be compelling, with some divine world-building. Unfortunately, its excess of Epic Internet References and uneven combat will keep me from ever truly loving it.