The team to see it through to the end, but really, I think I need to give credit to everybody in this run.

I was not aware of just how much this game was going to kick my ass and after 20 attempts to nuzlocke, I decided to give it up and play through the game semi-normally, opting to continue limiting myself to one encounter per route, but I still got to choose which one it would be.
A super fun challenge to enhance the original Black & White which I already loved to death, even if the incessant rotation and triple battles got a bit irritating to try and plan for.

I got to beat the final boss with my favorite Pokemon and I don't think I can name a more euphoric feeling.

I'll admit first and foremost, I saw the leaks before release, I saw the trailers for this game, and I thought it looked like absolute dogshit! I was terrified to see where Fire Emblem was headed with this, and lord knows I wasn't anywhere close to interested in those avatar designs. I thought it looked like complete and utter ridiculousness, but... time went on, and it grew on me. As wheatie does, the game released and I saw a few clips of it floating around on different platforms. It looked ridiculous. Almost... intentionally so?

The story is terrible, yeah, of course, I think that's been made abundantly clear by everybody, but I can't help but smile at it still. Everything about Fire Emblem Engage is silly, from its writing, to its character designs, to just its whole damn premise, it's absurd! And yet, they seem to know that! So instead of desperately trying to claw its way into a dark and brooding story, it almost felt like they were more leaning into the absurdity of what they had. This isn't a game you're supposed to take seriously, and I fuckin' love it.

Looking past that, though, as a Fire Emblem in gameplay, it does a stellar job. I don't feel the need to go over what everyone else already has countless times before, general consensus seems to be shockingly positive regarding the map design and the gameplay, but I also really enjoyed some of the paralogues, getting to revisit maps from the older games and even getting to walk around them somewhat freely after the fight's over. That's something I'd also like to talk about, because good god this game is so fucking pretty! Maybe I'm just surprised after having played Three Houses for so long and staring at its boring and repetitive maps so many times, but even besides that, the hub worlds like the Somniel or the post-battle, fully modeled maps, I was absolutely astounded by just how beautiful Engage was to look at. Could very well be the prettiest game on the Switch, helped by its already vibrant and colorful/flashy design everywhere else.

Now combine those beautiful atmospheres with a just as beautiful soundtrack, pure bliss. I spent so much time in the Somniel just spacing out and wandering the area, listening to whichever song fit the time, and at this point I think it's going to stay with me for the next while. The serenity that comes with these tracks is something I find scarcely matched in other media. Shit, I'm listening to them even now, writing this review, thanks to this cool little compilation I found of all of 'em. That's not to say the other tracks aren't amazing as well. Being as obsessed with this series as I have been for the last eight years or so, it was more than exhilarating listening to the throwbacks they whipped up for all of the Emblem Trial paralogues, or the slow and gratifying buildup of Last Engage at the end, to be followed shortly after by a lovely vocal track for the credits roll, among god knows how many others.

Engage was a stunning, whimsical, and just overall fun experience, in every sense of the word. I regret being so doubtful of this game at first, and I especially regret taking 14 entire months to finish it (oops). It's, as I said, absurd and ridiculous the whole way through, and I've learned to appreciate that sort of thing so much more over the years. I can't call it my favorite Fire Emblem, Sacred Stones has that nostalgia (and GBA) bias over me, but this was still a marvelous love letter to one of my favorite franchises ever, even despite some of its more prominent shortcomings.

"camp" as the kids say

look i'm SORRY i really am but like i'm having a lot of fun checking in on all the stuff i remembered as a kid, this just so happens to be one of them LMAO

I don't have any fun tales to tell or any vibes to reminisce on like I did in my EYX review, which is unfortunate because that means I actually have to try and figure out what I'm supposed to say about "Sonic.EXE" and his game.

But I don't wanna be too negative about it. I actually have some nice things to say, though it's more so just me being surprised and not actually anything I'd call any good. My memory of this game was purely what it started out as, walk right and watch these characters die in about 15 or so minutes. To my shock and surprise, there have actually been some very major changes made in the 11 years since that original release. You are now given the option to, uh... I dunno, see a little more? You can fulfill certain requirements (walking left instead of right) to find extra stages that provide something of a story that I don't care about, culminating in one last little walk to the right as the blue blur himself. Blur as in he's being covered in static, nothing speed wise, he's still just walking. Aside from that, Knuckles can punch now, Robotnik lost his ability to slide (sad!), and sometimes you need to jump instead of it being purely a walk to the right. The art at the end is different, frankly a little more silly looking than the original, but shit I know there's not much you can do about that.

Was fun to see what's new, but it's still a shitty story written by a shitty person turned into a shitty game. As much as I got to gush over the community aspect of it all before, I still can't deny that much. Still not a 1/10 though lmao

I only recently learned that this even exists, just by scrolling through a particular shop of no importance. I figured, why not, I'll give it a fun try, and in the only way I know how anymore. With a 16 Star speedrun.

... That run took me, like, two weeks, because I immediately learned upon booting the game up that my New Nintendo 2DS XL™©'s analog stick has drift. Something I'd never noticed, but I suppose the stick is extra sensitive when it comes to Mario 64.

As far as I can tell, it's just Super Mario 64 on 3DS. A marvel to be sure, and a fun game all around, if you're looking for a fun new way to play, there's no reason not to try it out. Assuming your system doesn't also have drift. That can get very annoying, no matter how short you're playtime might be.

also would not recommend BLJs on a 3DS, not very fun.

I'm gonna use this page as an opportunity to talk about the DLC rings, since the Fell Xenologue is its own page. I'll also be talking about them all separately, because I feel like it idk

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Tiki
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alright i'll admit first off, I don't remember much of the first three maps. It's taken me over a year to finish this game (still not done) and I did these first few back when I was still in like, Chapter 10 or something. I remember finding it pretty fun, apparently it's a reference to Fire Emblem 3 which I never played, and I love the ring itself for being the only playable manakete we have in Engage. Sometimes British people are okay.
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Soren
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The most I remember about him is that I played his map while I was out of state with a bunch of my friends just after graduation, and I liked that trip a lot. He kinda kicked my ass, though. I put him on Celine and now every time she fights somebody I get to listen to the skill activation sound effect like 10 times in rapid succession, very satisfying.
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Veronica
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God, it is so weird that she's even here, DLC or not. I refuse to believe Heroes has any sort of impact on any sort of canon, also why's she look like that what happened to her
I hate Heroes and I hate her. Don't care much for the ring, either.
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Hector
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Forgot he was even part of the DLC until I played his map. Minor, but I'm still not the biggest fan of his voice. Haven't gotten to use him all that much since I just did these last three earlier today. He'll probably go great on Jade. Map was okay.
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Chr🏳️‍🌈m and R🏳️‍🌈bin
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god i mean just look at them, these two can't go 5 minutes without each other, and could probably go hours with each other sorry, the ring? Uhh, they're fine enough. Giga Levin Sword is a very funny name, their map was easy as hell, I'm not sure what they thought they would achieve by doing nothing at the top of the map the whole time. Or maybe I do know...
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Camilla
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"Emblem of Revelation" mhm yeah sure. Nobody else could've fit that title better. Not a one. I certainly can't think of any. I couldn't imagine why Camilla got included over Azura.
Her map was ugly as sin and ran horribly, too, I just hate her. Not her, more like her inclusion. As much as I hate to bring it up again, I think Heroes is partly to blame for just how tired I am of seeing Camilla everywhere.
Sidenote that I'd like to add 'cause I thought it was a little funny; I was told this map would take "About 35 Turns" yet I finished it in 8 after Camilla tried to attack Chloé on her turn, missed, and died to a crit. L bozo.

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this review's kinda all over the place, i'll finish this game soon. i have so much to say, 95% of which is positive.
look forward to that in, like... i dunno, a week? hopefully less than that? 3/5 dlc, though.

This was the first of the Shantae games I had played way back in early-mid 2018, when I had been randomly compelled to try out the series and became her number one advocate for a Smash Bros. inclusion, which... :(... but oh well. I think this is easily the one everyone should start with, as it's not as frustrating as the first game, yet nowhere near the polish and style of the later entries. It's a valuable playthrough if you're hoping to get into the series yourself, but I wouldn't blame anyone for skipping it to play Pirate's Curse instead.

Admittedly, Risky's Revenge is not quite as good as I had remembered as a kid. Dungeons are all pretty bland in design, sluggish to traverse, and the world outside of those dungeons can be rather barren. Shantae herself doesn't control the best either, her hair attacks always carry the long windup and cooldown whether she's fully upgraded or not. It's not terrible, especially for being only her second (...third?) outing, but it's not easy to come back to after playing the rest of her series. I couldn't help but think about how much more I'd be enjoying Pirate's Curse or Half-Genie Hero throughout my playthrough.

i'll also admit that i tried to play the first game before this and gave up after a short while, so hey, Risky's Revenge is definitely a fine improvement.

The art is pretty nice, some silly little tricks pulled with the occasional fake pop-ups and the movement/renaming of the window that I think are pretty neat. Knuckles shows up for a couple minutes, calls you a bitch, Ray the Flying Squirrel is also there for some reason, who knows. Mediocre game, and I'm sure whatever's coming up in the (uncertain) future of this game will be interesting to see. I'd like to use this review for something a little more, though. I just want to talk about the "EXE" concept as a whole.

Obviously, we all know who to thank for this dumbass's resurgence, and while that's a whole tale of its own that I do not want to get into, it's been genuinely intriguing to see the rat come back after over half a decade, this suddenly, and this strongly. While I had completely forgotten about the creepypasta a couple years after it's time, there was still a niche, devoted community that was creating and writing all sorts of different stories and monsters under the executable moniker. A devout fanbase for what's generally agreed upon to be one of the worst horror stories of its kind, I just think it's fascinating.

Hell, to this day, I'm still hearing of new hogs or foxes just in passing. There has been so much more added not only to the original story, but to the ever expanding roster of characters. I'll provide a link just to let everyone see what I'm talking about, and while yes, they can't all be winners, and they certainly can't all be much to gawk over since, at the forefront of it all, it's still Sonic the Hedgehog, but it's... fun. It is legitimately fun just taking the time to read other people's ideas and looking over the designs to see what they can come up with off of these zany characters. That's what Sonic is! He's a simple, fun character that people have experimented with for years just for the hell of it! Ignore whatever preconceived notions you have of the community or the character and just have fun with your own imagination!

In the midst of my 1am ramblings, I decided to give it a go myself and say "fuck it, i'll make my own." She sits inside emulated copies of Sonic Advance 2 and mourns the fact that she hasn't been in an actual Sonic game in a decade. If there's any more I feel like adding to this, I might come back to it later. For now, though, this was half shitpost, half me testing myself to see if I knew how to draw Sonic characters at all. Turned out better than I was expecting, and I enjoyed drawing it.



... oh, yeah, the game i'm reviewing. uhh 3/10, i guess.

The day is April 1st, 2024. April Fools' Day! What are some silly pranks I can play on people on such a momentous occasion as this?
I've got a good one! I'll finally play the sequel to that game I hate, and see if it's actually any good.

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I've made it clear enough how much I hate Breath of the Wild, how much it quite literally pains me to play it. Obviously, I wouldn't be looking forward to Tears of the Kingdom either. Especially with just how much they tried to hype it up, like good lord this shit ended at least four Nintendo Directs. Despite all that, I decided to make a fool of myself today and give it a try, thanks to my brother being a BOTW fan in my stead, and purchasing this game back when it released. Be surprised when you hear this: I still don't like it.

I went into TOTK with no intentions of ever finishing it, and certainly no intentions of putting too much time into it. I gave it two hours, finished two shrines, and fucked around with whatever new mechanics they gave me. Shockingly though, I can at the very least admit that I didn't hate the new ideas. I enjoyed fusing items together a decent amount. It's definitely more Zelda than I felt with its prequel.

Unfortunately, there's still the entire rest of the game. The large, open world that has me running in circles for lord knows how long because I can't figure out a way to reach that spot I pinpointed on my map. The open world that I will be begrudgingly slogging through because my stamina doesn't allow me to speed up for any longer than three seconds. The very same open world that ends up giving me a headache if I spend too long in it. I didn't like it then, and I still don't like it now, fun new gimmicks or otherwise.

But hey, that's more than I could say for Breath of the Wild. Given that I had even the slightest amount of fun ever, I can still call it better than the first. It even took a little longer to give me a headache this time around. Maybe next time we can get an actual Zelda game.

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why did i do this?

more like Queen Peach i tell you hwat

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As stated in my last review on Super Princess Peach, I was very excited for Showtime. Like, way more excited than I ever thought I would be. Just off of the first couple trailers, I was enamored by the charm and promise that was being presented, what would essentially be a full game's worth of watching Peach undergo magical girl transformations and exploring different set pieces with her new abilities. I was in it for the style, and nothing else. As time went on (and as Nintendo kept spoiling all of the fucking costumes on their Twitter...), in an unusual turn of events, my excitement only grew. The demo drops, I play it, and I'm locked in, pre-order and all. I got what I came for, and I enjoyed every second of it.

almost every second of it.

Obviously, the costumes are all fantastic. It is such a breath of fresh air seeing such a major character for the series in all these different outfits, especially since Peach doesn't usually get to do much in the first place. Of course she has all of her spin-off designs, but Showtime does so much more with everything, experimenting with all sorts of aesthetics and colors, not one of them failing to impress. That really was all I was expecting for this game, so to move on to the actual gameplay...

It's fine enough? Peach doesn't get much of a moveset, the game only ever utilizes a total of three buttons, and I think they did fairly well with such limited controls. Not every gimmick is a winner (lord knows I never want to play another patissiere level again), but I thoroughly enjoyed what they came up with, the big stars being the detective, mermaid, and ice skater plays. (sorry, ice world bias.)
I have to admit, though, and it never really makes itself known upon first playthrough, but holy hell is this game slow. Again, it's never a problem as long as you can finish up everything you need to in one go, collecting all the Sparkle Stones and Ribbons, but, say you miss one of those collectibles, either by simply not exploring enough or failing a certain task; in order to go back and try for it again, you have to do everything from start to finish a second time. Your newly made progress won't be saved after exiting the stage like in the previous Peach game, so instead you'll have to repeat the whole stage, and by then, you'll notice that most of your time in each level will be spent completely motionless as some dialogue fades in and out of view. You aren't given the option to skip any of it, either. Text is placed on screen by itself, accompanied by animations that you have to wait for the end of before you are allowed to start moving again. As I said, not a big deal on the first playthrough, but it gets excruciating having to see it any more times than once. god forbid you spend 30 damn minutes on the second patissiere level like i did

I see where everyone else is coming from. Yes, Princess Peach: Showtime! can feel incredibly easy, handhold-y, linear, whatever else you might have heard. It is not complex in the slightest, but that's not what I was looking forward to. I was looking forward to the cute costumes and the fun worlds to look at, with the added bonus of some new personality for the princess herself. With such little expectations, of course I was going to have at least a little fun. Not the "game of the year" I was maybe (somewhat ironically) psyching myself up for, but I'd say it's considerably better than everyone else is giving it credit for. Again, though, that could just be my low standards, made even lower after recently finishing a much worse Peach oriented game.

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peach's next smash moveset could be killer if you think about it now holy shit

March 22nd, 2024, marks the release day of Princess Peach Showtime, a game that I have been looking forward to since its reveal, and even more so after playing the demo recently and being absolutely enamored by its sense of creativity and whimsy. I figured, hey, if I'm looking forward to this Peach game so much, I should give the first one a try as well! I sincerely doubt they'll be at all related to each other, but its fun to get the full Princess Peach experience regardless. Except this one wasn't very fun, actually.

Super Princess Peach is, 90% of the time, a mindless walk through a quick level grabbing whatever collectibles you need or may come across. The other 10% is a frustrating mess of a labyrinth where you will be wandering the area multiple times over in hopes of finding the weird little happenstance you need to pull of to find a Toad, or having a good old trial & error fest in a room that is exclusively pipes that only exist to drag you back to the beginning of the room. One of them takes you to the end of the level, have fun guessing.

The game doesn't do much to make these levels feel special, either. Peach's entire gimmick is her four emotions (stellar concept really), or three, given that one of them does nothing but heal Peach, in a game where dying is not only extremely difficult, but goes practically unpunished on the off chance it does happen.
The three emotions that actually are utilized are never for any more than a couple purposes. Being happy makes her spin windmills or blow away large clouds, maybe float at a snail's pace if you don't feel like platforming; being sad makes her run faster and grow plants; being angry makes her burn bridges and light torches, up until the end of the game where they just do that for you anyway. Very rarely will a new opportunity arise for one of Peach's abilities, but chances are you won't be seeing it again after a couple more levels.
Making it to the end of each world will reward you with a boss fight that follows a quick and easy touch screen minigame. Every boss in the game has one weakness that you will be told about just before fighting them, and they will hardly change anything up the whole time. Pick their favorite feeling and hit them five times with it, win game. Hell, you don't actually need to use any of the emotions for the final boss of the game except for one very brief instance of Rage just before the final hit.

The story is nothing I'm crazy for, either. I didn't care for Perry, and I guess Nintendo didn't either. Bowser and the gang find a Vibe Scepter (good one) that makes everyone very emotional, giving them similar abilities to Peach herself. This doesn't matter, SPP is more focused on giving you quick glimpses into the talking parasol's past at the end of each world, something something evil magic something something old man. It's your job to help reunite them. Or don't. You won't.

I was content on giving this game maybe a low 6/10 if it weren't for that final world. Genuinely appalling decisions made there.
Oh well, I don't have to play it anymore. Still looking forward to my Game of the Year tomorrow. Stay tuned for that one.

Four years...
It took me four years...
But I have it

No matter how many times it's been said in the past, Persona 4: Dancing All Night may just be one of the strangest decisions Atlus has ever made. To take their critically acclaimed murder mystery and turn it into a rhythm game, complete with professional dancers, tons of different artists providing remixes for old songs, and, uh... Hatsune Miku. And to somehow make it good?

I won't speak on the Story Mode since, again, it's been four years, and I remember none of it, so the most I can do is talk about everything else.
The music is the best out of the Dancing series, giving spotlight to even some of the more obscure Persona songs that you don't tend to see talked about, like the opening to Persona 4 Arena (the first one), and even extending some other songs with new lyrics. I'm not gonna try and act like I understand the deeper meaning behind "yeah, flooded apple pie, left out 'til somebody cries" but I still think it's nice to hear more from one of my favorite soundtracks ever.
Gameplay is surprisingly reasonable, though there are some charts that can be a little wonky. The hitsounds are satisfying when timed right, and the controls are smooth enough to feel fun. I'll add, though, I played the entirety of the game by scratching with the analog sticks instead of L1/R1, I just can't see how those two buttons feel comfortable with everything else. I'd maybe understand it if it were L2/R2, but sadly that just isn't an option. I find my fingers to be a little too close together on the former.

I feel like I'm repeating myself, but I can't stress enough just how weird it is that this worked so well. Even weirder how the other 2 dancing games that came after fucking sucked LMAO
Proud to finally have my FC on every song in the game, 9/10.