Prototype is one of the games that I find to be very very complicated for me. On one hand, it is by far the most entertaining "senseless murder" game for me. The ability to just vore your enemies, play as a bodysnatching goop man and fuck up the entire military singlehandedly and just wreak an inhumane amount of havoc is SO fun, but jesus christ the story is intolerable. It's just a pain to get through. Maybe it picks up later but from the decent amount of time I put into the story it just seemed like B-list hollywood shlock. The protagonist is annoyingly edgy and the plot is generic as all hell. This is a D tier and a S tier game all at once. It's best elements are when you're not playing the actual story, but to get to cool stuff you have to play the story. It's hard to critique it and praise it on the merits of destructive chaos, and just ignore everything else about it.

Picture this: your family is a strong one, and you love and cherish each and every one of them. They all have flaws here and there and you don't really think you understand the younger ones but, then there's Grandpa RBY. He's the patriarch of the family and you have to respect him, of course, but he's not as sharp as he seemed back in the day. He's very archaic, still hasn't figured out how to use a computer, or a blender, He kinda just sits around and does things no one does anymore: for good reason. But, when you go to Grandpa's house for thanksgiving, despite all of this, he will show you the most uniquely fucked things that only he could show you. He is absolutely lovely, even if you have to recognize the fact that he's just not all there in the head and is probably racist.

Pokemon Red and Blue.

I have very negative views of this game, so I should make it clear to whatever unfortunate soul got sent this page via discord as I cram my psuedo-intellectual opinions down your throat, I do not like Risk of Rain 2 and never want to touch it ever again. Entirely via bad association.

However, Risk of Rain 2 is fucking phenomenal. It's art direction, chaos, incredible and diverse roster, world design, enemy design, don't get me started on the music. It is an astronomically amazing game in a very objective sense. However, I hate it because I just can't disconnect it from my own very personal experiences.

I consider this to be my least favourite game. Not because it is the worst game ever made, not because it offended me. But simply because it was kind of the death of my innocence. That's not the game's fault. But at some point, you do realize that you'll grow out of things. You will eventually realize that one day your Pokemon isn't quite as nice as it used to look. I always knew Pokemon had problems, but this one in particular puts all of those problems at full blast. Handholding, wishy washy designs, a shitty story that is not good but also detracts, lacking in content, characters that don't compel, and making it far too easy to make the game easy.

The game has a lot of good quality of life elements and some of the character and pokemon designs I do like. But that didn't really change that I felt like my Pokemon journey ended on the day this dropped. Maybe Scarlet and Violet is a banger game I need to try. Or, maybe I just need to move on and let Pokemon be what it wants to be and I can just grow up.

Basically, what I'm saying is play a REAL Shin Megami Tensei game.

This game was a massive let down. I don't get it. I don't like how it controls and I feel like it wasn't quite as good looking as I'd expect a Kill la Kill game to look. KLK is my favourite anime, so I was walking in expecting to at least feel okay about it despite its reception. I don't know why they thought KLK needed an arena fighter but, it didn't. KLK deserves better, I think. And Silver, if you're reading this, I'll try it again someday but I doubt my thoughts are gonna change all that much. Fight me in Guilty Gear bitch

Helltaker is one of the most boring puzzle games I have EVER played- no, one of the most boring games I've ever played. It's puzzles aren't often very challenging or engaging, and when they do rack the brain a little bit they're just annoying. This game is fucking whack to play.

"Oh but the art is incredible!"

Yes. Helltaker looks stellar. The art and designs are impeccable. Yes, I've seen Beelzebub and yes she do make me feel some type of way, however, Helltaker is a video game. If I wanted to see these characters look pretty, rule34 is right down the hall and to the left. And the cool part about that is that I don't have to play a game I don't like playing to see it.

Persona 1 has my favourite vibe from the entire series. It's tone is delicious, its music is eerie and its purple drenched dreamlike imagery is captivating.

FUCK this game though, you'll have more fun playing a chess match with a toddler. Every battle feels like an event, and not in the way SMT games do it. There's so many affinities, the enemies barely give exp and the encounter rate is ludicrous. I played a hefty 10 hours of the game, and I dreaded every minute of combat. There is NOTHING redeeming about the combat sections of this game, which really sucks because its vibes and story are some of the nicest in the series.

Super Metroid was probably great for the time. I can recognize that there are many elements that developed into what people love about Metroid that came from this game. In hindsight, however, I find this game to be a fucking melodramatic slog. Games like Fusion and AM2R managed to capture my imagination, and then exploit it when it revealed to me that despite the colour of the worlds they invited me into, I had reason to be worried. This game tries to smack "FEEL TENSE" over your head. I feel like it doesn't give you a moment to actually feel safe enough to feel threatened, if that makes sense. How am I supposed to feel more threatened in a new area if the music is just as downtrodden, if the colours are as dull and dark, if there isn't a moment for me to go "wow I'm such a badass !" that's immediately followed by "OH NO IM NOT SUCH A BADASS ANYMORE FUCK"?

The controls are fine, the progression is fine, and I'll admit that I quite like the ending of the game. I still didn't like the rest of the game.

To be entirely fair, Super Metroid was the last of the 2D Metroids I played (haven't finished Dread). Maybe I was just desensitized.