I would like to start this by giving you a warning prior to reading this. Not only will this have spoilers for The Gardens Between, this is also a self indulgent piece of wankery that goes down many tangents. Now that you know, if you wish to do so, read on. If not, have a great day, even though you are obviously a scumbag.

Still here? Great, hello.

I have never written a piece about a game before. I have never been inclined to do so. I never wish to know the opinion of someone else before going into a game, so I do not read reviews until perhaps after the fact. So, why would I want to write about this game, The Gardens Between, a game that on my PS5, says I have played for a grand total of 4 hours, which includes 1 full playthrough then a mop up of trophies? It’s not exactly an exclusive review, with the game being released initially in 2018. For time scale comparison, it also tells me I have put in over 450 hours into EAFC 24. Why would I dedicate a lot more time than what I have played the game, looking into this small game, made by TheVoxAgents, a small indie company, based on the other side of the world from me? Why am I not writing about EAFC 24, a game I clearly cannot stop playing? I won’t answer the last question, but if you keep reading, you will find out about why I am writing about this specific game. So onto what inspired me, via, what inspired the developers.

In an interview in 2018 with Joel Couture of Gamasutra (now GameDeveloper), one the Founders of TheVoxAgents, Matthew Clarke, mentioned that they were inspired to make this game due to a scene in the movie Minority Report starring Tom Cruise, based on a novella of the same name, by Phillip K Dick. In Minority Report, Tom Cruise plays Precrime Chief John Anderton, who is tasked with stopping crimes before they are committed, specifically murders.

How this is done is shown in the very first scenes of the movie, where Anderton scrolls through the murderer’s moments up until the deed, showing how the Precrime officers can actually alter the timeline to arrest the guilty party before they go ahead with the murder. The finer details to how this is done is not important, at least to this piece anyway. What is important is this one scene from one movie being an influence on a full indie game…as well as that I only watched this movie after reading the interview. Why did I watch it? Simply, I wanted to see the movie that influenced a game that has had me writing this very piece. It’s a decent movie. Is it important to you? Not in the slightest. Is there any more relevance from the movie to the game? No. There are no murders in the game, thankfully. At this point please remind yourself that I mentioned at the top, that this will be going on tangents. Also, wankey.

After finishing The Gardens Between, I wanted to see what the overall opinion of the game was. I went onto YouTube, as I wanted to see if there had been any attempt at a longform Retrospective or critique, as I am fascinated by the depths people can go to in offering analysis and critique, especially when they are not just a retelling of the medium they are referring to. Actually, my fascination doesn’t come from longform critiques of games, it comes from enjoying listening to people speak at length about something that they are passionate and well informed about. This often leads me to a rabbit hole of rabbit holes. You cannot dig up. You just keep on going. Do you know what a lolcow is? Have you seen any of the many YouTube documentaries about lolcows? I do, and I have. Lots of them. Do not start. Anyways, there were no longforms of The Gardens Between. So I checked for reviews, there were a few.

In the reviews I saw, (that I detest spending time reading through completely if they don’t engage me ((at this point I will admit to the hypocrisy of me writing this longer piece when I don’t even bother reading shorter reviews. In my defence, I told you from the start of the tangents and wankery. I have some self awareness after all))) I noticed The Gardens Between being referred to as a game about time. Then seen a quote about this being about the “enduring power of friendship,” (actually, editing this, the latter is a quote from TheVoxelAgent’s very own press kit). For me, it’s not about that. I know, I am disagreeing with the very people that made this game, but then again… and hear me out, what do they know? On a serious note, I ALMOST agree with it.

For me, time is not what the game is about, but it is the main character. The game is more about memories and friendships, but not of them being “enduring.”. Which then led to my feelings about the game, how it affected me, what inspired me to write about this. The inspiration being a specific memory of my childhood, unsurfaced after many years. We will get to that, don’t you worry.

In The Gardens Between, you have two close friends, Arina & Frendt. I won’t copy and paste the press kit. Go to a review of this game and you will see it. This is not to say that there is a problem with doing that, I understand it. The game itself, well, it doesn’t freely give you any information about the characters. You have to earn it. This game has no speech, no subtitles and almost no signage. You are only greeted with a small cutscene, then straight into the game we go. Then you have the game, accompanied by a very subtle, but very nice, peaceful soundtrack. This game is the pinnacle of the narrative technique of “show, don’t tell.” You see it all before you, you get what is going on. It really is a beautiful, deep, simple story. As a big fan of this sort of technique, where you can piece together their story, The Gardens Between absolutely nails it.

By this point I am three coffees deep. I was going to go full gamerbro mode, (you know, level up and all that) and purchase some G-Fuel as they sell them in one of the ever increasing American sweet shops near me, but they are £5 a can! £5! At the speed I can annihilate an energy drink, which will no doubt lead to many heart palpitations and issues down the line, I cannot go so far into funding my own demise. I will stick to my Nescafe. Demise still, but, cost of living, you know?

In the same interview mentioned before in Gamasutra (now GameDeveloper) Matthew Clarke said it was because of Donkey Kong Country on SNES that he and his friends would sit and try and create platformer levels.

After playing The Gardens Between and being hit with a specific memory in my childhood, followed by the mention of this specific game, in this interview, just floored me. Not literally. More childhood memories came flooding back, which I felt tied in with The Gardens Between, it was simply more memories, this time good memories, of my friend and I.

Of course, nostalgia is a hell of a drug. If there is one thing we all love a good hit of, is some good nostalgic memories. Some sweet memories when things were perfect and we didn’t have constant sore backs or wake up tired. Things weren’t perfect then, far from it, but, mate, Donkey Kong Country was out. Get it snorted.

Of course, just like drugs, with nostalgia, the first time is as good as it gets. I’ll never get to relive that memory, that game I liked as a child, I would not want to play it now. Do you like to do that? Can you even do it without me having to phone the police on you for being a filthy thief, a pirate? And if so, can you say it was as good as when you played it the first time, all that time ago? With a straight face? You cannot. Sometimes it’s because of the advancements of games since then, but, also, the memories you put together whilst playing the games. At least, the memories are the blockage for me. Especially with Donkey Kong Country.

My friend and I would constantly play Donkey Kong Country. We both bought it on release day. We played it single player first. We would watch each other play it. Then we would play it co-op, switching who would be the big man and who would be Diddy Kong. We would play in my house through the weekends. Usually we would alternate games that we played, but for quite some time, it was just DKC, even after we had completed the game. Even after we had 101%’ed it. Then we played it on Vs. mode. Every Friday, Saturday, Sunday, or whenever we could, we would sit there, in what would these days be referred to as “Flow State,” hardly uttering a word to each other during gameplay. I vividly remember that by that point, dying in a level, with the amount of times we had played it, was punished. If you failed to complete a level even twice, you may as well concede the whole game. We went through it twice. We were 1-1.

We started a 3rd, but, by that point, other games came out, and we just sort of realised, with us both being able to complete the game without much effort (still some because it’s not an easy game at all) maybe it was time to try something else. We had milked that game for everything it had. We snorted the hell out of that game. I had amazing games on the SNES, amazing memories, but that was the last great memory of the SNES involving my friends that would not come back until Goldeneye (we are not going there. If I ever do this again, maybe).

If you think I can go back and play Donkey Kong Country and get even close to the enjoyable memories of nostalgia that I can remember so well from close to twenty years ago (DKC came out here 18th November 1994), well, my friend, you are very, very wrong. We will never be young again, only worrying about homework. Now we have responsibilities. He has children. He plays games on the Switch with them. I am imagining him trying for that high again and it won’t come.

Or maybe…maybe he doesn’t have the same memories I have. Maybe he only played Donkey Kong Country so much because for a while it was the only game we had in common. The only thing I can be sure of is my own recollection of the time.

Those recollections are nothing but that now. Memories, perhaps manipulated by time. We move on. We live our lives. We are still friends. We just don’t see each other as we used to. I wish we could go back. Time controls us and our memories.

Memories of childhood are so important to the understanding of why I am even writing about The Gardens Between, and even before I read the interview that brought up DKC, I had decided I was going to write about it. Added research gave you another story. You’re welcome / I’m sorry (delete as appropriate).

With The Gardens Between, it takes you through the memories of these two close friends and neighbours. It’s instantly relatable for me and I feel many others, as your closest friends are usually sorted by proximity. Proximity mines in Goldeneye Multiplayer mate. Not now. Not the time.

The memories, as said before, follow the “show don’t tell,” technique. The different aspects of their memories that they shared together, unravelling themselves, through your manipulating of the levels via the character of time.

As you go through the levels, each group of levels being particles of a significant memory, you firstly see Arina moving in, Frendt introducing himself. Then they become friends, Arina offering Frendt an Ice Lolly as Frendt fills a paddling pool. The way the game shows this is through a little cutscene. As you go through the levels, you will see the exact items you see in them form as parts of the memory cutscenes. Some of these items you have to manipulate with time in order to advance the levels, the memories, the story. Show, don’t tell.

I won’t go through the full story beat by beat for you. The memories they have are pretty generic, but, for me, that’s the point. Think of some of the memories you have had as a child with a friend. Similar cutscenes to your memories probably appear in the game. I can tell you that I could relate to pretty much every memory that came up.

Especially the last one. Not exactly, but close enough. Close enough for it to bring me to be writing this. Close enough for it to hurt, all these years later. I am about to tell you the ending of this game, so if you have not played this and want to do so without it being spoiled, you best go now. Thank you for your time. Okay, now it’s going to be people that have played the game, don’t care about the ending or have a morbid curiousity about my life. Fair enough. Let’s remove the plaster to the wound I forgot I had until the last few seconds of the game.

The last scene shows the two friends Arina and Frendt hugging. It pans out to show a “SOLD” sign outside Frendt’s house. He gets into a car after the hug, Arina looking, to me, a bit sad about it all. The car drives off. Arina waves as the car passes, now smiling as she waves, then we pan up and we run credits.

Bittersweet ending, you will agree. However, I was thrown off by it.

Arina smiling.

Why is Arina smiling?

I had two theories. Arina is smiling because she wants to put on a brave face for Frendt, almost in a way of assuring him that everything will be okay, that even though he is moving away, that they will still be friends. The reason she is sad before, is because she knows, deep down, that this will not be the case. She knows things will not be the same, but she can’t let Frendt know the harsh truth behind it all. Things will never be the same for them. Sure, Arina could say that they will keep in touch. Maybe they will phone each other (this is set during a time before social media, evident by the memories that they have, the games they play, etc), at first maybe all the time, then a little less, then a little less. Then at birthdays. Then they get older, then all they have are distant memories with a distant friend. By the time Facebook comes along, they’ve both grown up, have families. Refer to each other as an “old friend,” or “my neighbour as a kid.” Oh yeah, side note, tell me when you get the feeling I am projecting…

…I wish this was my projection.

And this is the more positive of the two theories.

The second theory is…maybe she believes that it will actually be okay. She is standing there smiling, waving, because she thinks that there will still be a relationship for them that will not wither and die out through the ravages of time, the main character.

This made my heart sink. I could not get beyond it. Then a memory came back, one specific person, one specific timeframe. Recalled from memory, after years of never being thought about. Buried somewhere deep down, it rose and became front of centre.

I was a child. I was 6. Summer holidays. My friend, who I would later play DKC to death with, was away on holiday. We were part of a group of friends, but they all seemed to be away, or busy. Whatever it was, I found myself, by myself, as a 6 year old in summer. And as a 6 year old finding myself in such a situation, I went about to find a new friend. And I did.

Someone in my street who I did not know, had their granddaughter over. I started talking to the granddaughter. As a 6 year old, that then meant I had a new friend. My new friend told me she was here for two weeks!

Time makes liars of us all eventually detectives, so I cannot say exactly what we did for those two weeks, because I cannot remember it all. I remember her having a colouring book with butterflies and her being very tidy with it, making sure she would not go over the lines. I cannot remember if I did any colouring in for the book or if I just watched her. I remember us playing tig/tag, whatever you call just chasing each other about, before getting exhausted and then going to the newsagents close by to buy something to drink. Then do whatever else we thought was fun at the time.

Some days she would knock on my door to see if I wanted to play, sometimes I would go up to the building of flats and try to remember which flat she would be in. Those two weeks, those were happy memories. After the two weeks, she left, went away to wherever she lived the rest of the year. As a 6 year old, you don’t feel the loss of someone leaving, especially when they say they will be back at some point. We didn’t hug. We just said bye. As if we would see each other the next day.

I saw her again. A year later. Summer again. And she came to see if I wanted to play. I did! My friend was back! Another fun day!

However, there was a difference. My other friends were around as well. They wanted to play football through the summer. And my girl friend didn’t. I did. So I said to her that I would play with her another time. From my recollection, she looked a sad and ran home.

The next day, I went to the building to see her. She was gone.

I never saw her again.

I don’t know what happened to her. I would walk past the building, at first all the time wondering where she was, if she visited again, then as time passed, I went there less. Then, life continued on. Time went on. She was not there the next summer. I don’t even know if the family still were.

I never got to say an actual goodbye to her. Instead I ran off and played football. I was 7.

This was over 30 years ago. 30 years, in which for quite a lot of that time, this memory, this person, this new friend, I have never even thought about. Until the last few seconds of The Gardens Between. Arina smiling. Had she not been smiling, had she been crying, or still looking upset, the memory may not have resurfaced. She was smiling. Much like I probably would have been the last time I saw her. Not realising, due to age, that I may have hurt her feelings. Not realising, due to age, that I would never see her again.

The worst part of it all is, the thing that upsets me the most is, I cannot remember her name.

I hope I never forget her, and yet, I never even knew her. I never will. And as time takes control of my life, I will misremember. Was it a colouring book? Could it have been a dot to dot book? I cannot even remember her name. I wouldn’t even be able to find her, even if I wanted to. I wouldn’t be able to recognise her at all. And if I could, what would be said? Do you remember me? We were friends for two weeks over 30 years ago. For two weeks, I had an inseparable friendship. I ruined that the following year. The Gardens Between reminded me of that. Not about the “enduring power of friendship,” but of the end of one, that vanished, then wilted from memory, until now.

I wonder if she ever thinks about me. I just want her to know I am sorry.