16 reviews liked by SuperYoshi


"JoJo's Dumbass Adventure gets a 4.5."
"Yeah, open my mind, put the garbage in it."
-Tommy Tallarico

This is a 3D platformer with a really solid player controller. The challenges are often quite satisfying to overcome, and platforming around feels nice and intuitive. It's also got really funny writing.

The graphics are really on point and genuinely look era appropriate. If this game actually released on the N64 back in the day, we'd be talking about it alongside games like Banjo Kazooie.

Though the game isn't without its issues. I wish the game was longer (though the game only costs £5.89), but also I feel the level design sometimes lets it down. There's a few platforming challenges in this game that are made more difficult than they need to be, primarily because you're fighting with the camera.

I also really wish the soundtrack was better. It's got a fun and quirky tone, but it's far too repetitive and can get a bit grating. This would be alleviated if some of the songs had B sections that were more harmonically diverse.

In spite of these issues, I'd wholeheartedly recommend this game to any 3D platformer fans.

really good combat and story brought down a bit by mmo style quest structure. side quests are generally boring except for a few funny ones (the lost pet one and the one where the boy was being attacked by a wolf specifically). some of the boss fights are the coolest thing ive ever seen in a video game with insane power scaling and platinum games moments. soundtrack is also amazing. good game

This review is spoiler free

Armored Core VI is a weird ass game. It’s an amalgamation of all of FromSoftware’s recent titles: the boss design of Soulsborne, the stagger mechanic and aggressiveness of Sekiro, the spectacle of Elden Ring, And as a weird melting pot of all these games comes a perfect lens to examine their strengths and weaknesses. They are at their fullest potential here: when AC6 works, and everything clicks, it is a peerless experience, truly unmatched. When it doesn’t - and this is a lot, especially in the early game - there is little more frustrating and unfun.

I’ve played Dark Souls 1, most of DS3, a bit of Bloodborne, all of Sekiro multiple times, AC1, AC1PP, AC2, AC2AA, and a bit of AC3. While I am no expert, I do feel comfortable speaking on both the Souls series and the many AC games. I’ve also 100%’d AC6 outside of S-ranking every mission. I’ve broken down the numerous problems with the game into four core categories. While difficult to talk about individually due to their linked nature, I’ll do my best to make each part easy to understand on its own. These are (in no particular order): Difficulty, Balance, Parts Selection/Customization, and Series Lineage/Souls Influence. I want to be clear: I love this game. I think it’s amazing, and it’s easily my favorite of recent Fromsoft titles, outside of maybe Sekiro. I just want this foundation - and if we’re going off previous titles and their “generations,” this is what this game is - to be the groundwork for an even better expansion or game.

I’ll come out and say it: the game is too hard. At least in the early game, that is. Within the community, the boss Balteus has made quite a name for himself. Some say he’s a skill check. Others say he's a build check. Others still say he’s a filter. In reality he’s all three, but in the worst way: he’s a skill check for things you haven’t learned, he’s a build check for things you do not have. Of course, this ties into all three other core issues - the balance of the weapons you do have, the power of the ones you do not, and the fact that if you approach this as an Armored Core game first, you will get your shit wrecked. To say there is a difficulty spike in Armored Core 6 is a lie: there is a difficulty cliff. Balteus is so much more difficult than anything you’ve dealt with before. This is not the Taurus Demon, no, this is Black Dragon Kalameet at SL1. It is stupid hard, due to four factors: Souslike boss design, limited part selection, limited OS upgrades, and limited player experience. While the last is not a bad thing necessarily, it also bleeds into the issue of limited part selection and OS upgrades. When you play Sekiro, there is no variable of what you are using to fight the boss. There is only one weapon in that game, and that is the only weapon in that game. So when it comes time to struggle against a difficult foe, the question the player asks is: what am I doing wrong? It is the only question the player has to ask; it holds the key to their success. Sekiro takes the burden of choice away from the player. Armored Core does not. What it does do is drop you into an encounter with a beefy, Souls style boss, in a non Souls setting, with what is comparatively a massive amount of options at their disposal. So when they inevitably die, over and over, when they likely never have before that point in the game, the question is not “what am I doing wrong?” The question is “is what I’m using wrong?” What this does is seed doubt into the player, and where there is doubt, there will always be frustration. This is further exacerbated by the fact that, at this point, the player has probably never even needed to change loadouts, because everything dies so quickly, except for bosses. Again, the issue of balance comes up. When you are not fighting a boss, you’re free to play how you want. Want to go with a lightweight reverse joint? A middleweight all-rounder biped? What about a heavyweight tank with incredible firepower? You can do it all, except for the bosses. That’s when the game slaps you on the wrist and says “nuh uh, you’re playing Armored Souls now, time to do pattern recognition for the next hour.” It is incongruent to the rest of the experience. Of course, the boss is weak to count them, one (1) gun and one (1) melee weapon. Of course, high impact weapons also have a high effect - weapons such as handguns, shotguns, gatlings. But the player doesn’t know that. Up until this point, they’ve been doing great with just a regular assault rifle.

I’ve been talking a lot about Balteus, because I genuinely think it’s the game’s lowest point. This is due to OS Tuning, the nature of impact vs. raw damage, and the dripfed parts in the arena. Arena works differently in 6 compared to prior titles - the main draw is not, in fact, money (of which it gives a pitiful amount, but the new OS chips. Some of this is good - restricting weapon bay and boost kick to not overwhelm new players is a good idea - but the fact that you can incrementally upgrade your flat damage is something that doesn’t belong in the game, full stop. It means that bosses are largely tuned around max OS upgrades, and unless you know what you’re doing, a new player will likely choose to unlock system upgrades rather than damage upgrades. It seems that the “intended” way to beat Balteus is to use the Pulse type weaponry, going off of the pitiful damage done at this point in the game, as well as what Sulla uses before the boss proper. Armored Core is no stranger to making you change things within your build. But here, I think it’s too restricting, especially for a series with a heart of player expression.

Restricting your loadout goes beyond this boss, too. Now we come to the issue of balance within AC6, and to put it simply: it’s not good. One of the reasons I’m leaving multiplayer out of this review is due to this. You simply cannot use some weapons for bosses due to their pitiful impact damage; it’s like shooting a boss with the base Shuriken in Sekiro compared to the Ichimonji other weapons are capable of. Laser rifles are bad enough, but anything that requires you to stand still to fire/charge it is essentially a death sentence, especially early game. The tradeoff is that you get loads of stagger damage off, especially depending on what gun you’re using (shoutout to the Sondbirds.) Assault rifles of all kinds are essentially unusable, machine guns are terrible, 90% of kinetic missile launchers are just worse than their energy counterparts. Compared to shit like Songbirds, Zimmermans, Gatlings, needle guns, and the like, the game actively punishes you for not using high impact weapons, because if you don’t, you are going to be stuck on bosses for a very long time. There is such a disparity in both balance and playstyle when it comes time to fight a boss that it’s truly a bipolar experience. When you play how the game wants, these bosses feel really fun, I admit that. The issue is that there is even a “right” and “wrong” way to play the game in the first place. I don’t think that this type of design should be in an Armored Core game. I believe it is antithetical to the experience provided in essentially all of the older titles, and it really is a damn shame, especially with how much time was clearly poured into boss encounters and making every weapon feel unique.

Finally, we come to series lineage and Souls influence. It’s clear as day that many concessions were made for the player experience, for accessibility’s sake: a more generous control scheme, removal of mechanics like turn speed and debt, checkpoints, resupply stations. I don’t think these are bad (though I do admit I have an affinity for the abrasive nature of older titles). What I don’t like is the obvious Souls boss design on display here, with the game expecting you to die over and over again in order to learn attack patterns and strategies. It just doesn’t feel like an Armored Core game to me - I think this stuff is better suited for their Souls line of games. Again, shockingly none of these bosses are bad, and playing against them is really, really fun. However, I wish Armored Core was less afraid to embrace a weird, unique identity of its own. Instead, it steals from this and that to create somewhat a hodgepodge of a game. Would I rather they have gone in a different direction? Yeah, probably. The results here, though, are undeniable. When this game is good, when you enter the flow of combat; it is a ridiculous amount of fun. And it could be even better.
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Some miscellaneous things I couldn’t fit: the soundtrack is mid. I don’t like it. It’s more ambient and lowkey and that’s lame! Give me the bangers! Especially a garage theme. Please make the next garage theme better.

Story is.. weird. Some things are not followed up on at all. Some things are left intentionally vague. I’ll have to see where I stand on it. Still figuring out my thoughts

The Arena is a letdown. Not really any memorable fights to speak of here. You can’t choose the maps, either, and the fact that it’s all a simulation makes it feel even more lame. Make the next game more stingy with credits and make the Arena pay out more, and just remove the OS tuning mechanic

This is a video game.

This, is a video game.

This shouldn't have to be said. But ever greater grow the perverse incentives which have led astray this nubile young artistic medium, trying desperately to please the tastes and desires of a growing audience who want video games to be something else. To enjoy God Hand, you have to be a fan of VIDEO GAMES. If this experience turns you away, perhaps you've been lying to yourself that you actually like video games in the first place. Maybe you're the problem.

God Hand doesn't give a shit. God Hand is a game. God Hand will make no attempts to reward or please you through any way other than the satisfaction of play. Mastering a system, making it your own, and overcoming hardships through pure intrinsic reward and intuition. When you play God Hand right, it's like a symphony in your hands.

From a gamefeel standpoint, the words that come to mind are raw, snappy, crunchy. This game is proof that simple is better. Write a system, and trust the player to deal with it. ( And throw in some incredible audio design feedback to top things off )

More games used to be this way. Perhaps it was merely a consequence of an era where developers simply didn't know better, Pandora's box hadn't been opened, they were blissfully ignorant of the power in their hands. But modern devs understand now how to fine tune and cheat gamefeel to be friendlier to the player, ease them into success, give them an edge. What they fail to recognize however is that sometimes that power is best left unused, a temptation of sin that's so hard to ignore when you're overly concerned with playtesting, metrics, and broadening your audience.

When you're so eager to over-engineer your gamefeel, it eventually leaves your game evoking words more akin to gummy, sticky, or prescriptive. Particularly now in taking a step into the past, God Hand is just so refreshing. Animations play, hitboxes clash, and you deal with the consequences.

I had a far better time with it then I expected to have. The game's sense of humor, fantastic cast, and novel surprises were just icing on the cake which kept any part of this game from feeling stale or dull. Even the sometimes excessive repeated content didn't detract to much for me, as it often served to give me an opportunity to display how much I'd grown at playing the game by dominating a once imposing threat in seconds flat.

This game never stops expecting MORE from you. The scenarios are built at your expense, and almost any moment of quiet or reprieve where most games would seemingly step off the gas, God Hand takes the opportunity to sucker punch you, up the ante, lay on the pressure, and let you know that you need to stay on your toes.

This is how you demand mastery. Take the rough stone that is the player, apply enough pressure, and a diamond will come shining out the other end. A game SHOULD expect you to actually be good at it in order to succeed, shouldn't it? If your goal isn't to be good at something, why are you even playing? God Hand understands this implicitly. Having one of the best mirror matches in any game makes it clear what they valued, here.

The only things I could really find to complain about playing God Hand was that the auto-lock-on was occasionally a bit disagreeable, the camera could have benefitted from backing out in a few fights, and that the game ends a bit abruptly. I would have killed for a more bombastic "mine is the drill that will pierce the heavens!" style ending that turned things up to 11, but what is there is serviceable enough.

I laughed, I cried, my wrist hurts. Sounds like any good session of chain yanking to me. What more is there to say?

The true value of a game lies in what it leaves the player with after they've put it down. It follows thus, that the true job of any game developer, and by extension any artist, is to metaphorically fuck the viewer's mind and blow a hot sticky load of memetic material straight into their fertile cortical folds, ensuring the propagation of many healthy spiritual progeny. It was by this process of inspiration-impregnation that games like Bomb Rush Cyberfunk cum to be, and if Bomb Rush Cyberfunk went to my school I definitely would have bullied the ever-loving shit out of him for having such a stupid name. ButtFuck CyberTruck, CumSlut SiphonSpunk, Homestuck FuckingSucks, and possibly my favorite, ButtMush FiberFlush. I would be merciless, it would be so bad that he would go home early every day and his dad, Tony Hawk, would find him brooding in his room listening to old mixtapes on the Naganuma-compatible cd player his dead mother, Jet Set Radio, left behind. Tony didn't get why the boy held on to that stupid thing, and he could never figure out why that made him so goddamn mad. The way Jet Set Radio's eyes would wander when she did the pornstar grind, he knew she was putting on a show, but it wasn't for him. Now that I think about it, damn kid doesn't even look like me, doesn't trick like me... but the way he manuals, gliding effortlessly, perfectly balanced. I didn't teach him that. That's not skating, it's mockery, and I'm the one looking a fool, because he knows what I've always suspected but could never confirm, that I'm a real WashedUp SkaterCuck. You think you can hurt me? I've got news for you, kid: pain made the hawk a goddamn legend.

The belt lashes came hard and without warning, but Bomb Rush Cyberfunk's face remained a flat and inanimate mask. As the belt clattered to the floor, Tony hocked a loogie and spat on the poor skater.

"You're not even worth beating."

Bomb Rush starts the way you would expect every good gangbang to end, the team clearly poured a lot of love into that opening. It's a bold and bedroom-eyed promise for your forty bucks, but that's where the pretense drops and you're pop-n-locked in for 8 hours of mostly going through the motions. There's grinding, getting railed, turning tricks, and a dribbling climax, which admittedly feels kinda okay, but you gotta endure two awkward hours of post-nut clarity that leaves you wondering if "kinda okay" is the best you'll ever get, just like my fucking ex. Thanks, Lucy.

For a game about criminally defacing public property to unilaterally prescribe which sanitized street art jpegs you're allowed to raise the property value with... well, it sure as hell isn't vandalism, but it may as well be robbery for depriving the world of a better game. It's missing the point of graffiti so profoundly that I struggle to think of anything funnier to say other than to merely state as a fact that Jet Set Radio, the borrowed heart and soul of Bomb Rush Cyberfunk, HAS a graffiti editor.

There is a version of this game where I could have taken a sniper bullet to the head and had my corpse stomped on by metal gear because I painted a mural of Mario spreading his gaping anus over New Amsterdam, and the world of gaming is poorer to have never gotten it.

But hey, modding would be hella boring if it the devs supported it.

This review contains spoilers

Being a huge Jet Set Radio fan, I had been looking forward to this ever since it was announced. Upon completing it, I can say in good faith that it was pretty good overall. Although I enjoyed my time with it, I believe it fell short of its potential and ended up being more of an approximation than a triumphant evolution of this type of game.

I have a lot to say explaining why I feel this way. I will say that the majority of this will involve nitpicking, surely. Though I feel like these add up in a way that brings the game down for me. Overall, it just bums me out a bit that it couldn't have been more.

I'd like to emphasize that, despite my mixed feelings, I genuinely enjoyed my time with the game. So let me start off with what I really did enjoy about the game.

The opening to the game all around is pretty good. It's pretty straight to the point with its tutorials, starts you in an interesting environment, and has an intriguing setup to the story. I'd argue that the chosen setup is quite bold. If you knew anything about this game going in, you'd know about the robot head. So setting this up in an interesting way is key to this story working.

I very much enjoy the environment art. It nails the JSRF look while also not feeling super derivative with its graffiti and billboard art as good examples. I'd say this also shines the brightest when it comes to the "dream" levels. Which are honestly the best part of the game all around really.

Most of the soundtrack is enjoyable. Naganuma honestly never misses, and I've adored his style for nearly two decades. It really wouldn't be the same without him. Getting that out of the way, the other music included is enjoyable and varied overall. There are two tracks, however, I did not enjoy very much, but that is simply my taste and I don't think it's an issue.

As for the gameplay, there is a lot to like about it. A game like this has never felt so good to control. Platforming feels fantastic and is the most enjoyable aspect of the game. The air dash and boost offer the player freedom in a way that helps platforming but does not completely trivialize the platforming challenge.

The "dream" sequences I mentioned earlier are my favorite. They take full advantage of all the tools in your kit in a very fun and engaging way. I was immediately looking forward to these every time as the level design was at its peak here. Really helps that it has its own vibe and unique visuals.

The mailroom challenges stand out as one of my favorite aspects of the game. I find these to be very fun and rewarding. I also enjoy the design of the mascot you have to high-five. This also ties into how they design the platforming challenges. While I consider these challenges generally easier than certain tag missions, they still demand a strong grasp of the game's mechanics and the ability to maintain combos.

On the topic of tagging, it's also a standout aspect of the game. A significant portion of the platforming revolves around discovering these spots. This part of the game has you eager to explore how to get up or into an area. Something I feel the game does better than JSR for sure. It definitely makes you think spatially in a way that's interesting. I even had a few that I was unable to figure out.

The same principle applies to the hidden unlockables scattered throughout the game. Though I'd say that these reward exploration more so and make looking for every nook and cranny worth it.

One of the game's strengths is its open nature. Regardless of the situation, you have the freedom to engage in side activities. Whether you're in the midst of a challenge or even facing a boss, you can still partake in tagging or other side content. It's worth mentioning that bosses can restrict you to a specific area. This was more about not being locked out from content that is available in said area. This is also one of the only examples I can think that limits where you are able to go.

I'd like to specifically point out Pyramid Island as an area that I really enjoyed. The towering structures and distinctive design really make it stand out compared to the other levels. Not that I have really any issues with any of them, period. I enjoyed how most levels were designed. Plenty of fun exploration and engaging platforming all around.

These next things I will address are mostly good, but I have some things to say that are not strictly positive.

The trick system lends to the classic gameplay of getting a high combo, which is always fun and satisfying. However, only having three tricks to spam with no directional inputs makes it less engaging overall. Though way better than JSR ever did it, I wish they went further in a Tony Hawk direction.

The vehicle variety is a fun touch. Although I find a few things odd about them. Vehicles are often used as a means to access collectibles rather than providing gameplay variety. I also find it unnecessary that you can switch between vehicles beyond simply using your favorite character with your preferred ride.

The concept of having a phone that you can use without pausing the gameplay is a very neat addition. The phone works well as a map and has a fun early 2000s design. I think that a few small tweaks would have made it even better. A few more things should have been marked on the map like mailrooms and taxi signs. Lastly, I wish that when selecting music, it would start me where I left off last. Having to scroll down through the top again is tiresome when you have so many tracks.

The Oldheads serve as gatekeepers to different areas, and the quality of these areas varies significantly. While some of the areas they unlock are genuinely compelling, others feel rather lackluster. I'm glad they exist due to some of the fun challenges and interesting areas they unlock. It doesn't change the fact that some of them feel very empty and confusing.

Before delving into my criticisms, I want to emphasize that I genuinely enjoyed playing this game enough to unlock most of its content and tag all but four spots. I really did have a good time, but some decisions really confused me. Granted, I'd like to reiterate that many of these issues, when considered individually, may not seem significant. However, I'll be diving into nitpicking to address them, as I believe these details are worth discussing and contemplating. I would also like to mention that I will be comparing this to Jet Set Radio more frequently here.

First impressions are quite important. So why, in this bombastic funky game, is there absolutely no audio or flair on the title screen? I think it's very confusing tonally. Not only that, but I immediately assumed something was wrong with my setup as pressing start also had no sound. I think this is a legit issue I hope they address, but I'm also surprised by how boring it is even without audio. Compare this to both JSR title screens, and it's night and day. Luckily, I think the main menu is completely fine, but how much better would that even be if the title screen was full of energy of any kind.

Another thing regarding first impressions is the name of the game itself. I find it to be too long and confusing. It took me a while to even remember what it's called, and I've had friends on many occasions not able to recall the name. I think they should have shortened it down or called it something simple. It feels like they just wanted three words similar to the naming scheme of Jet Set Radio. I don't think it really works when it's such a mouthful, and people can't recall it easily.

Something else I feel I have to address is the price point. Normally I would never even bring this up in a review as I find it has nothing to do with the artistic merit of the game. Though it seems people find the price to be too high. I think the price is totally fair. However, they have some day one DLC I do not completely agree with. I feel like there was no reason to do this other than to capitalize off their previous work. Overall though, I'm not too offended by it. I just think if you were to unlock it in the endgame, it would be a fun, charming surprise instead of feeling "greedy."

When it comes to the story, I think it starts strong, as I mentioned earlier, but beyond that, I think it starts to flounder. There is nothing that interesting save for a few moments such as Red cracking his robot head. I find the dialogue to be uninteresting and semi-awkward at times. An example I made note of was Red saying "So you are like, my dad?" to the Flesh Prince. Found it to be an odd choice of words for that moment, but at least I remember it. The same could not be said about the majority of the writing. I was often paying attention to the writing but impatiently waiting for when I could play the game again.

As for the characters in this game, I can't say I care for them very much. I don't dislike their designs, but I don't find them to really work for me. Especially compared to JSR characters, which I love the majority of. I think it's a shame because I also enjoy most of the Lethal League characters. I will say that I find Red's design pretty decent, which is important. Though I feel his head is a bit too close to Unit-02 from Evangelion.

They really needed a character like DJ Professor K. He does wonders for JSR, which without him, the playable characters are cool looking but fairly shallow. Not to mention the games also have an interesting police chief so it isn't just the DJ. I feel like JSR does a lot more with less.

It doesn't help either that the story does not do a ton to flesh out these characters in any way that makes me care about them very much. I will say that Solace is at least memorable all around. He has some quirks and his design is unique, although I can't say I really like him either.

The characters, unfortunately, lack depth. Given the storytelling approach compared to JSR, there was potential to develop them further. However, they come across as uninspiring and not written in an interesting way. As someone who places a high value on character design, it can significantly influence my perception of a character. While I genuinely hope that others find some attachment to these characters, I personally didn't find them compelling.

The voice acting in Lethal League played a crucial role in making me appreciate the characters, going beyond just their designs. Something JSR doesn't even really have going for it. The same could not be said here. In fact, I feel like I can hardly hear what they are saying in their lines, especially with the default SFX to music balancing. Beyond that even, I feel like most voices aren't memorable and are even inconsistent in quality. A good example lies in the NPCs, while not as critical to the overall experience, they showcase inconsistencies in quality, including issues like low-quality sounding clips and outright microphone clipping.

The sound design can be described as adequate; however, I believe it lacks the charming little jingles and impactful sounds that really worked for JSR. I suspect the issue again lies in the sound mixing. Fortunately, the game provides options to adjust the music volume, as it should, but it doesn't completely resolve this issue.

Now I will finally go into direct comparison with JSRF overall. I don't think this game does enough to separate itself from Future. It's pretty derivative all around. Luckily for them, Future is not an accessible video game in the slightest. Team Reptile clearly ended up wanting to make a better JSRF. I'd say they were mostly successful overall. Though I feel like most players have never played the original let alone Future, which puts them in a very fortunate position. I can't even feel bad for Sega; they clearly messed up badly by never re-releasing the game.

That being said, they borrow a lot from Future. So much so that it's practically the same game in many ways.

The whole idea of the open connected world is straight from Future. They even have a way better map, more places to go, and better location variety than Bomb Rush. Bomb Rush even copies areas too closely for me. Brink Terminal resembles Shibuya Terminal and the Hideout does the Garage. Both areas you will see within five minutes of playing Future. Some other areas resemble things from Future as well, but I think they did a better job typically of making it different enough.

I could make many more comparisons, but I'd rather focus on a few more than list everything I can think of. The point I'm more so trying to make is how derivative it all is. The style JSR oozes I don't even think Sega could authentically replicate again. Trying to emulate such a high bar is incredibly difficult and causes the game to fall flat a little bit. I think the closest anything ever got to it is Splatoon, which also manages to be completely unique. Lethal League also manages to do a better job than Bomb Rush.

Even with improvements being made to Future's formula I can't say it's a straight upgrade. Future has things going for it over its spiritual successor.
Bomb Rush doesn't quite capture all the intricate details and nuances that make Jet Set Radio as a whole so exceptional. I've mentioned some already even. The biggest thing though is JSR has its own identity, which is really important. I can only imagine I'd love to replay JSRF in time, but who knows if I would as easily do so with Bomb Rush.

While Bomb Rush trims some fat and tedium, I feel the pacing of Future is far more captivating. Utilizing smaller areas with distinct challenges and requiring return visits to previous locations proves to be a more engaging approach. In comparison, Bomb Rush adopts six major areas with smaller sub-areas, which works reasonably well but doesn't quite match the diversity found in Future's numerous distinct locations.

I genuinely appreciate the way they handle unlockables in this game, especially when compared to Jet Set Radio. Unlocking everything in those games was quite a hassle. The approach here, which is easier overall and incorporates some puzzle elements, is a definite improvement.

Let's get into the gameplay overall. I already talked about how I wish the trick system was a little bit more complex. I think it works well enough especially when the endgame challenges you to achieve a high score within a time limit. Beyond that though, I find it to be quite easy to keep a combo going. The primary reason for this I'd say is how forgiving the manual is. It goes on for way too long and is quite mobile. This in turn practically trivializes any time you need to do a crew battle. I never lost once even if I screwed up badly.

I just wish doing combos was more engaging. Seems to become a chore faster than it should. Luckily the rail leaning system adds a bit to the gameplay. The speed it gives you plus adding to the multiplier makes it pretty satisfying. Unfortunately, the novelty wears off when it becomes one of only two methods to raise the multiplier. If they even added a small variety of tricks you wouldn't be mindlessly mashing the three buttons for the majority of the combo.

Another criticism of this system is how they don't have much to break your combo. The only thing that comes to mind is stairs, which are not commonly an obstacle so they are easy to stay away from. I think you should also be able to beef it in some capacity, which is currently impossible. You don't even take fall damage when landing from incredible heights.

Getting off your vehicle is a nice touch in theory, but I find it does little to add to the game. I think a way they could have fixed this was if the vehicles were more unruly. As it stands, it's more of an annoyance when you are swapped into this mode by things like stairs. I'd say that it still has a purpose, but its limited use here compared to its potential in Tony Hawk Underground is disappointing. I think my biggest gripe regarding it is when you need to slide. I would often forget I need to be off my vehicle, which would slow the game down to a crawl. The only reason this was an issue is because there is hardly ever a reason to get off of your vehicle.

Regardless of all these remarks, it does manage to make all of this more engaging than JSR ever did. It's just a tease when they were clearly inspired by Tony Hawk that they didn't go even a little further.

While I've praised the overall experience of tagging, it's worth discussing the tagging input system. I always missed doing inputs in Future, and I think the original game is a little long-winded. Bomb Rush strikes a balance between the styles of JSR and Future, although I find it to be a little shallow honestly. I feel like I shouldn't be able to just spin the stick with my eyes closed. If not, I think I should at least be vulnerable while doing it. I think it's good enough overall and I enjoy that it's lenient positioning-wise.

I enjoy the art that they included in the game. Having the freedom to choose which you'd like to use is a fun idea. Though I feel like it's a huge missed opportunity to not allow players to customize graffiti when both JSR games allowed this. I feel like you should just be able to upload a picture from your PC if you'd like. This would encourage players to memorize the inputs for graffiti tenfold instead of spamming the stick always like I did.

The combat in the game is definitely lacking. It lacks weight and focus, but the biggest issue, I'd say, is how impactless it feels. They do use a small particle effect, which is nice, but I don't think it's apparent enough. I believe they could've enhanced it with some audio cues and screenshake, perhaps. It stands out as the least satisfying aspect of the game.

Speaking of combat, I noticed a narrow opportunity to spray the police when they were knocked away. The window of opportunity was so brief that it felt unintended, although I managed to pull it off a couple of times. It wasn't until I found myself in a dire situation at the mall, repeatedly getting gunned down by the police, that I stumbled upon the solution. If you jump after attacking once you will get this prompt. It's a neat feature, but it makes combat trivial. Why would you not do this every time when it works so effectively?

The larger enemies and bosses, with a few exceptions, are defeated too easily. Nothing really feels like a threat in this game. Especially when your health regenerates crazy fast. The police, even when on high alert, usually aren't a problem, except for the occasional snipers. Especially when you can just get rid of them with a change of clothes. DJ Cyber is probably the best boss in the game though lacking a little polish. It should be more apparent you need to reflect his records when it's the only time in the game you can even do such a thing.

I've mentioned a few times earlier that I believe the game is somewhat forgiving. Let me be clear: I think the game is too easy. However, I don't consider this a major issue. While I would have preferred more significant consequences for mistakes and a bit more challenging opposition, it's not a deal-breaker by any means.

I find it rather baffling that switching characters or using fast travel is such a lengthy process. I might have been more understanding of it if it didn't come with such strict limitations when it involves the police. I think I can understand restricting fast travel, but the fact that they refuse your ability to switch characters with any police activity is annoying and an odd choice. Especially when graffiti is so low risk in these situations. JSR was all about avoiding the police while tagging and that took like five times longer to do so. I will admit that I do like being able to choose dances and that they have some utility for the game however.

Another strange choice relates to how they handle skipping cutscenes. You'll find yourself watching the police cutscenes repeatedly, especially when backtracking. While skipping might seem useful, I'd argue that it takes too long. In some instances, you're practically forced to watch the entire cutscene. Moreover, there's hardly any feedback for this, which is a standard feature in most modern games. Adding to the frustration, some cutscenes are unskippable for no apparent reason.

A good example of this is after beating a single crew member in an area you have to watch this long drawn out cutscene. This gets repetitive quickly, and you almost always know exactly where the collectible is located anyway. I'd be slightly more lenient if the mailroom cutscene didn't have the opposite problem. It often appears very briefly, leaving you to sometimes wonder where it even is.

A good idea this game has is introducing gates based on what you are riding. It's practically the only thing that differentiates them at all. They are not implemented perfectly however. The bike gates are about as clear as they could be no issue here. The problem though is that the skateboard gates are not nearly as clear though at least stick out. To be honest, I never actually found out what the skates gate even is. I did notice some clear glass floors, which might be related, but I could never figure out what to do with them. This, I believe, further supports my point...

I found the final boss to be an entertaining spectacle and acceptable overall though I had at least one big issue with it. The issue is if you handstand on one of the polls you will never get hit. Other than that, I don't have much to say. It did its job fine enough I think. Especially compared to the other bosses of the game.

I don't really have anything to say regarding how the story wraps up or the post-game content. It's about what you'd expect. My feelings of apathy toward the story were not changed by the ending.

That's pretty much it. I'd like to talk about Lethal League a little more before I wrap up because I think it's important. I'd like to stress that those games are way better representations of a JSR-inspired game. I think the games have their own identity and are something new and unique. It feels like they were not nearly as passionate about Bomb Rush. They could have done so much more with it. Though I can't really blame them. It was a way more ambitious game scope-wise by far.

At the end of the day, I'm grateful that a game like this exists. Sega sure as hell hasn't been doing anything thus far, so having a game heavily inspired by an original Xbox exclusive is quite unique today. Game development is a tough process, and I don't want to come off as entitled. Difficult decisions and cuts are necessary when creating something like this. Overall, I believe the development team did a decent job, and it seems that many people enjoy it. I hope the team is satisfied with the outcome. While I understand this is an indie project compared to a big corporation like Sega, it's hard not to draw comparisons to what it's trying to emulate. I simply wanted to share my thoughts as a passionate fan of JSR. If you've read this far, I appreciate your time and would love to hear your thoughts too.

I walked through blood and bones in the streets of Manhattan, trying to find my brother.

He was in Northern Canada.

This review contains spoilers

There's kind of A LOT I have to say about this game, and the direction Pikmin as a series is going in. I'm sorry for myself for writing this and for you if for some reason you subject yourself to reading it.

Very long story short, this game's praise is incredibly overblown. It's nice that Pikmin has found a new audience, but at what cost? I think this series has lost it's soul and hollowed into a corporate mess that has rounded off so many corners that it now fails to evoke any sort of emotional response. It's not a bad game, but it is often boring, and makes me feel empty and sad.

It's probably useful to start by prefacing that I don't care for 3 very much at all, I never really understood the praise it got. In contrast I'm at least fairly conflicted when it comes to 4, but how in the world are people praising it as the peak of this series? I don't know what planet you're from but it sure as hell isn't PNF-404. This game IS confidently better than 3, and how middling I felt about it only served to push my opinion of 3 further down. I don't know why I bother but it's just hard to watch a series I care about flounder while Nintendo pins it down to lobotomize, declaw, and defang it.

So before I dirty myself and climb into the muck, I'll start with what good I found in Pikmin 4.

The game is pretty meaty. This is the most Pikmin bang for your buck that you're going to get in this series. That praise comes with some caveats, however. Depending on your outlook more isn't always better. Besides, art shouldn't be judged from the cynical perspective of value judgements based on cost. Do better and judge things based on the overall experience of engaging with it.

I'm really glad to be ditching the 3rd captain. I never personally cared for how much it complicated planning and management, 2 was just enough. Making the 2 captains asymmetric is also a nice change of pace, splitting up has more strategic weight to it. But it's a great idea that is clumsy in it's execution. (we'll GET to talking about Oatchi)

Loading zones were removed from 3, which is good. They broke up levels to much and tended to spoil and signpost boss encounters before they even began, they also tended to over incentivize the use of the "go here" map screen commands. (I don't want a game that plays itself for me, OK?)

Moving the ship to new bases is an interesting albeit odd addition. Sometimes a cool tactical option, and does allow more sprawling level design I guess? I think I like how it effects cave design more than main stages. It's a mechanic that has the strong potential to bolster puzzle and scenario building... But doesn't really get used for such, mostly operating as yet another design that feels as if it's there more out of a desire to keep the player comfortable than to give their brain a workout. If it has any merit, it's that it may be interesting in time challenges and speedruns where people are attempting to maximize their efficiency.

Bosses were returned to how they used to operate in 1 and 2. Pikmin 3 added phases, damage caps, and cutscenes which slowed the gameplay down and stole away the Pikmin series' unique experience of running into bosses in a diegetic fashion. Thanks to the removal of the damage phase caps, bosses once again reward skillful play by letting you kill them faster. Well, almost all the bosses, anyhow. 4 still committed this sin right at the end, just to spit in my dinner.

Dandori battles feel a bit arbitrary at times but are sort of fun, the versus mode from previous games having now been rolled into the primary experience.

On the other hand, Dandori CHALLENGES may be my favorite addition. It's really satisfying to work under tight restrictions and execute a plan to clean house, barely bringing in the final few items as the last few seconds tick down. (A feeling the series used to work towards facilitating more often). And these aren't afraid to get difficult either, refreshing!

There's actually some really cool new puzzle and environmental hazard additions that give both old and new Pikmin a lot of new strategic options and spice up the level design. Fire pinecones, deep water, pipes, fans, basically everything Ice Pikmin can do, fences and buttons. But they never quite get used to their full potential.

The Piklopedia is finally back. It was a gaping hole in Pikmin 3's overall experience, and it was sorely missed. It has new features too! Being able to fight anything is great. The new characters (we'll get to them much later) aren't interesting to listen to... But Olimar and Louie's logs remain as entertaining as they were in 2.

Olimar says sperm, we take those.

I love Groovy Long Legs. Best thing in the game. See, I don't just hate fun.

The Olimar mode almost makes me feel as If I'm playing a real Pikmin game, if only for the tension of a true time limit and the nostalgia bait it evokes with music and other references to Pikmin 1, but it's shallow praise that says more about Pikmin 1 than it does 4.

This is where that praise ends. Pikmin 4 inherited a lot of problems from 3, changed or fixed only some of them, but introduced some problems of it's own in the process. I can't help but use the word degenerate to describe the way this series has developed, in the most traditional sense of the word. There's so many little touches where in an effort to make the series more accessible or easier to play, they've sacrificed what made it special in the first place, rendering entire systems at the core of Pikmin pointless.

Controls are a big part of this problem, it's quite a can of worms. But I'm opening it, deep breath...

I'm going to start by calling out lock-on as a problematic addition to the Pikmin series. Pikmin is a game that's difficulty and intrigue is predicated on MANAGED CHAOS, and aiming your Pikmin to land where you need them was always a huge part of that. Maps full of hazards, large enemies for which what part of the body you throw Pikmin onto makes the difference between life or death, throwing Pikmin was always a focused and nuanced challenge that rewarded accuracy under pressure.

Then 3 added lock-on... and threw that all out the window. No longer do you need to split your attention between avoiding hazards and throwing Pikmin, or carefully aim to keep your Pikmin from soaring off cliffs or into water. Simply lock on, run in circles, and mash A. It's easier, less stressful, more friendly to new players! ...But you've now rendered enemy and map design as an afterthought you can mentally disengage with due to the confidence you now have that your Pikmin will just go exactly where you expect them to. What's even the point of snitchbugs, skitter leafs, dwarf bulborbs, snagrets, breadbugs, beady longlegs (and the family), honeywisps, iridescent glint beetles, ( I think you get the point ) in a world with lock on? Almost all the enemy design of Pikmin is RELIANT on the skill based aiming, and fighting these enemies went from engaging to literally mindless since 3 came out. Yet they're still here for some reason.

4 Is no different in this regard, but somehow they've managed to make it worse. 4 has an aggressive auto lock-on that is our first example of the many ways in which this game attempts to guess and/or assume player intent, and make choices FOR YOU. Throwing a Pikmin will often trigger the game to eagerly and automatically lock on to objects. The lock-on is also sticky, often frustratingly refusing to unlock from objects. When under pressure from time or enemies, you'll often find yourself mashing lock-on in a futile attempt to wrestle control back from the game, as it jumps to locking on to other objects you didn't intend... you might start to see the problem, but it doesn't end there.

The other half of this problem is the THROW CAP, one of the most baffling additions in Pikmin 4... So someone at Nintendo thought it was a little sad that you had to count out the Pikmin you threw onto objects, and decided a friendly change would be that when locked onto an object, the game will STOP LETTING YOU THROW once you hit the default Pikmin count required to interact with that object. Sure, it lets you mash indiscriminately without thought, but also removes an entire vector of control by which you could make strategic choices (or fail to do so). Also pressing throw and having NOTHING HAPPEN is one of the grossest gamefeel faux pas I've experienced in a long time. Just another way in which you can mentally disengage with the things in front of you, and let the game play itself. But it also completely fails to acknowledge that there is perfectly valid reasons to throw extra Pikmin onto an object.

Pikmin has always had the concept of "overloading", in which you would commit Pikmin beyond the minimum pickup count. A tradeoff to move the item faster in exchange for keeping more of your Pikmin busy. A feature I often strategically made use of to maximize the games precious Dandori. But the game tells me this is invalid (despite the feature still being there) and puts on the training wheels to prevent me from making mistakes. But you know what? It was also just downright satisfying to skillfully count out the exact amount of Pikmin to pick up a part, and it was also memorable when you flubbed it. Of course, you can still achieve overloads by not locking on... But recall the aforementioned issues with lock-on, and you can see that doing so has become so inconvenient as to render an entire staple feature present since the first game nearly unusable. The game fights being played in the way you want.

To add insult to injury, I've observed that idle Pikmin don't treat nearby tasks with equal weight, prioritizing certain tasks over others, and that overloading not only has a lower awareness range, but is lowest priority for idle Pikmin. So that is to say that the game continues to fight back even when you try to play around the lock on and do overloads in other ways. While this sucks for overloading, it's worth calling out how this exemplifies a change in priorities in this series away from player agency and planning, and towards convenience and pre-descriptive play.

The fact that Pikmin tasks aren't treated equally and neutrally based on distance means that the game is making value calls for the importance of tasks beyond the player's means. Not only does this degenerate design continue to undermine the original goals of the series, but it means the player now has to play around these predictions. I can't just throw 2 Pikmin down and expect them to move to the nearest task, I have to somehow guess the games preferences for the "better" task, and base my plans around that. A great example of this in action? Try to fight just about any enemy in the presence of slime molds, and note how your Pikmin will aggressively prioritize destroying the molds over the enemy.

To me changes like these are so obviously flawed that it's shocking to see a modern Nintendo game making them. Sometimes simple is better, the honest and raw heuristics by which this series historically operated on has always prioritized player agency. Why would you want to change that? Why over engineer and re-invent the wheel?

Speaking of which I now have to get on my soap box to similarly dismay Pikmin 3's addition of CHARGE. Charge sure is convenient! But I'm going to once again argue that managed chaos is the point of this series. Charge is to reliable, it's to good. Getting Pikmin on enemies was once a huge part of the challenge. And for that, we had SWARM. Swarm was exemplary of what Pikmin is supposed to be about, it could accomplish what Charge does, but only if you were a skilled player which carefully considered your Pikmin's positions and speeds, and were diligent in clumping them up and moving them to safe positions around enemies.

Plenty of enemies were also designed with swarm counters or immunities, in which hitting an enemies ankles versus their upper body did not reward the same amount of damage. Additionally since swarm took no account of Pikmin types, it was a TRADEOFF compared to throwing, in that it didn't allow you to be as selective with which Pikmin you were using. But Charge has no downsides, you can make sure to only charge with the type of your choice, and don't have to worry about Pikmin speed or clumping. Swarm was also not instant, more akin to a flow of Pikmin as apposed to a wrecking ball. I think it should be pretty obvious how charging the enemy reliably with a large group of exactly the type of Pikmin you want to use trivializes most encounters, and runs counter to this idea of Managed Chaos.

And just to kick me while I'm down, Pikmin 4 brought back swarm!... but stuck it in the post game. You get it so late that there's no time to use it. But also it's worth noting you can't use it on Oatchi... and well, when we get to talking about Oatchi it will become clear why even once you get swarm you STILL don't use it.

I also can't help but lament that due to 4's lock on issues, assigning Pikmin to pick up large groups of small objects has become excessively annoying. A problem that used to be solved through swarm, and that charge can't account for. As it stands the best solution in 4 for this problem is to dismiss your Pikmin, but that requires you to then wait for the others to move before calling the rest back.

Oh and speaking of calling! Let's discuss the whistle. I think a lot of people would likely respond "what's there to complain about with the whistle?, it's no different than in 1 and 2." Well, the main thing to note is that the minimum radius of the whistle has been increased since 3. Basically, tapping the button to do a small whistle no longer allows you to pinpoint and select small groups of 1-3 Pikmin. The whistle starts so large that you'll almost always select more Pikmin than you intend if you're trying to be precise. Just another way in which the game removes player agency.

Oh but why stop there? The whistle now has verticality as a factor. It's no longer infinitely tall along the Y axis. I believe this was an addition inherited from 3 due to the addition of flying Pikmin. Basically, the whistle doesn't extend up or down until reaching it's maximum radius, requiring you to hold it for multiple seconds to select Pikmin below or above you. It's not useful, hooray! It just slows down gameplay and makes it frustrating when using flying Pikmin or blues in deep water. Thanks, I hate it!

And that leads into another fantastic addition from 3 that still persists here. The "task pausing" behavior they've graciously added to the whistle. So in 1 and 2, a quick whistle could call Pikmin off any object. And you could be precise due to the small starting radius. But in 3 and 4, Pikmin carrying an object takes 2 whistles to call off. Huh?. Well, first if you whistle anywhere near Pikmin carrying something, they "Pause" their progress. And only after that can you whistle a second time to actually call them off. It's tedious and I fail to understand the advantage this has. The intent must be to prevent you from canceling carrying Pikmin when trying to call other idle Pikmin nearby, but this is a problem they manufactured when they made the whistle less accurate??? On top of that it's so easy to trigger by accident that you'll often find that while performing other tasks, you'll accidentally pause your Pikmin, wasting both their time as well as blocking other carrying Pikmin behind them. Thanks, I hate it!

Needless to say when it comes to Nintendo, but there's no options to tailor this half of the experience. I'd have little to complain about if I could disable lock on, throw caps, toggle whistle height scaling or task pausing. Maybe disable tutorials... But you can't. Thanks, I hate it.

I'll also take a moment to talk about the night missions. It's almost a fun idea? Pikmin tower defense? Sign me up. But they're pretty mindless, repetitive, and easy. There's not much strategy, just increase your glow Pikmin count and spam charge. But frankly the biggest reason I don't feel compelled to play them is something that will feel extremely familiar if you've played a lot of shrines in Zelda's last 2 outings. You can't just play a night mission, you have to talk to a character, watch / skip spam through about 2 cutscenes, wait through a loading screen, skip 2 more cutscenes, and then when you're done, you'll skip 2 more cutscenes, watch another loading screen, then skip 2 more cutscenes, watch the characters cure a captain, skip that, and then finally skip the cutscene to begin the next day. It's as excessive as it sounds and frankly I have a hard time emotionally telling you whether the mode really is that boring or if I'm just so sick of skipping through this much fluff that I have PTSD.

Y'know when I first saw some rumors that Pikmin 4 would allow you to play at night I was excited at the prospect of this being a broad change to the formula that would allow for more intricate strategies in stages and was well integrated into the story. But what we actually got is dissapointing. To top it off glow seeds are handed out like candy and while using glow Pikmin in caves is a fun idea as well, the reality is that it only serves to place another safety net under the pampered asses of an already outrageously spoiled playerbase.

I'm going to be a little rebel and also bring up the ability to move your ship/base as a negative. As I stated before they don't really do much with it, it could have been cool. But the thing I couldn't help but notice is that it sort of robs the game of the tension inherent to getting really far from your ship in previous games. Maps once used the distance to the ship as a way to wrack up tension, placing difficult enemies, stressfull scenarios, and treasures/ship parts far away where you were at your most vulnerable and most pressed for time. They could still be doing this in 4, even with the ability to move your base, but sort of just don't. So again, it seems to be just yet another way in which the game is simply trying to be friendly and more accessible.

There's a new achievement tracking system by which your are rewarded with currency for meeting small incremental goals. This sucks. I don't need artificial pats on the back for simply playing the game. The ritual of loading up the hub and talking to 6 bland characters and mashing through their dialogue to collect rewards isn't what I'd call fun. It doesn't help that this system literally spoils the game for you. Every time you update the "explore X maps" or "collect X onions" goals, it actually signposts that the game isn't over before the story has a chance to do this naturally. Good job guys, sure you thought that one through.

The game is full of shallow callbacks to Pikmin 1 and 2. Things they seem to be doing out of tradition or homage without understanding why that thing left an impression in the first place. What if we did the submerged castle again! Doesn't matter that the Water Wraith was effective for being a SURPRISE in 2, let's use the same name, same theme, same music, same floor layouts, and have a description that literally signposts that he's going to show up to remove that surprise. Also let's handicap his AI and make him incredibly unimposing thanks to how Oatchi works (we'll GET TO IT). Oh let's bring back Smokey Progg! But lest he be to difficult let's give him a slow projectile move and make him move around less so his smoke trail doesn't make anybody sad. Man At Legs! Puffstool is back! But he practically can't kill your Pikmin since we removed it's ability to inflict the novel and unique curse status that was so memorable... eh oh well. It's just frustrating to see all your favorite moments defanged and dragged out in display to dance for your amusement.

Making a spiritual successor to something should be about trying to reproduce the feelings the original made you feel by providing NEW, NOVEL experiences that feel motivated by a similar set of developer goals. Not simply a best hits track. And for all it's gallivanting about trying to be Pikmin 2, what NEW is there in 4 that exemplifies the spirit of Pikmin 2 in any way, shape, or form? I fail to think of anything.

As alluded to earlier the final boss of 4 for some reason commits the sins of Pikmin 3's bosses. It has phases, damage caps, cutscenes... It doesn't even let you carry Louie to the ship at the end. It's also just continued character assassination for Louie while also just not being a very cool setpiece? The fight's slow and cycle driven and gives the player no control over the pacing. Also isn't part of what always made Pikmin unique fighting bugs and strange creatures? Straying from the contemporary? How did we end up fighting dogs while rock music plays? I'll give it props for being possibly the only thing in the game with an effect that can insta-kill Pikmin. But all this really incentivized was doing the entire fight with Oatchi. Maybe that was intentional?

Oh hey why not take a moment to also wine about the farlic system? I like collecting the various colored onions to add new Pikmin to my lexicon, but lowering the maximum Pikmin count so aggressively just makes half the game feel like you've got training wheels on. Well, because you do.

A comment helped remind me of something I had a hard time putting my finger on. Which is why it is Pikmin 2 manages to feel moderately tenser and more time sensitive despite the lack of any true time limit. It's because enemies respawn. You'd always feel pressure to finish raking in treasure under threat that you'll have to clean out the level again if you failed to finish doing so before nightfall. Pikmin 4's friendly choice to never respawn enemies removes this tension, while also thematically sacrificing a bit of Pikmin's relation of the indifference of nature. Hell, they used to destroy your bridges and structures over subsequent days as well, keeping you ever vigilant to the idea that any progress you've fought for can and will be scraped back by nature's cold embrace if you don't keep a watchful eye.

Oh this is a big one, I almost forget to mention the "3 Pikmin type limit" slumped on this game. What in the hell were they thinking here. What does this... I don't, I just don't understand. It has so many knock-on effects. In prior games you would plan ahead and try to have enough of each type to have a versatile team of your favorites ready to take on any challenge... but you can't do that now. As such, the level designers had to assume you only had 3 types and design around that explicitly. Well with the designers hands tied, might as well just tell the player which 3 Pikmin types to take... so they do. So now team building is removed as a factor as well. Each level just prescribes what you should take.

You know in 2 I always brought whites in all situations because I enjoyed how fast they were, and saving time by using them to move most treasures was part of my strategy, at the trade off of having less Pikmin for other uses. That was a playstyle I chose and the game empowered me to explore. But the possibility space for how you play 4 has now been chucked in the bin, and for what? More restrictive level design? Well I know the answer is accessibility and not overwhelming the player in lieu of having 9 types of Pikmin AND Oatchi to contend with. But that's interesting, I'd rather you lean in on that and let me decide whether or not I want to play it simple or come up with complicated team builds. Thanks, I hate it.

Pikmin also "cheat" in these newer games. Their movement and capabilities no longer consistent and tangible in a way you have to play around and manage. Notice how newly called Pikmin rubber band and run faster than their base speed to catch up to the captain, notice how they teleport into your hand when you go to throw them. Notice how they never trip or lag behind when they have leaves. Take account of how they path around the map using the nav network on their own, minimalizing the importance of player management so they don't get "stuck" like they did in 1 and 2. But the pathing is also sometimes pretty bad and Pikmin take longer to get to you than they would have if they just ran in a straight line. Everything is so over-engineered. I can't believe the amount of reviews I see complaining about how unruly the Pikmin were in 1 and 2, and praising 3 for "fixing" it. THAT WAS THE POINT. You people don't understand this series.

A shocking amount of enemies including a lot of the new ones simply can't kill your Pikmin. That's not a new thing, but in past games nuisance enemies would be paired with genuinely dangerous enemies to create interesting scenarios that were genuinely challenging. This game seems allergic to the idea of placing even 2 difficult enemies within any degree of proximity, rendering a lot of the encounters pointless when Pikmin aren't in any danger.

People complain about electricity in 2, but I think there needs to be more consideration in this series as to what actually makes hazards different. Spamming whistle to make your Pikmin essentially invincible when encountering any hazard is yet another degenerative design degradation exacerbated by the more generous hazard timers in 3 and 4. And say what you will about electricity in 2 but you can't say it didn't make your butthole pucker and take those hazards VERY SERIOUSLY. Is it wrong to want to feel something?

This game just wants you to succeed so much. It's so friendly and eager to give you tools and tricks that remove or minimize how much you need to actually plan or pay attention. The obfuscation of upgrades to a shop really exacerbates the problem. In past game's abilities were doled out at a controlled rate and were kept in check from a usefulness perspective, tending to avoid power creep. They were also exciting to retrieve as immediate rewards for defeating bosses or reaching milestones. But now everything you do rewards the same resource and defers the true payout until later, dulling the experience. This is also one way in which the scope and length of Pikmin 4 works to it's detriment, as the designers have been incentivized to invent new abilities to pad out the shop.

The "Idler's Alert" is super useful and can be used to strategize, I'm torn on it. But It can't be denied that it gives me far less reason to keep track of where my Pikmin are, and gives me far less reason to split up my captains, which was often done in the past to babysit Pikmin and ensure that I am covering more of the map and that a captain would never be to far from a Pikmin in need. But it's really useful during Dandori challenges. The "Homesick Signal" however is so clearly an "easy button" that further degrades Pikmin's identity as a series. Making sure Pikmin didn't get lost and die to nightfall has been a memorable staple in Pikmin since day 1. But this basically can't happen any longer so long as you push this one button in your item menu before the day ends...

There's so many defensive buffs you can pile on, and they're relatively cheap. I think your average Pikmin 4 player will have been long immune to most hazards before the game ever presents them with fire or wind or poison. Why did they even bother? I never got close to getting myself downed.

Top that off with the introduction of consumables. If you want you can just buy your way out of any situation by loading up on bombs in the shop or what have you. But don't worry, the game will rain scrummy bones and spicy spray on you like it's Christmas morning so you won't really need to bother.

Almost every use of spray in Pikmin 2 was a tactical decision with which you committed a vital resource you had harvested yourself. In this game I found myself using spray in every fight and still had an excess of 50+ sprays by the end of the game. This is no longer a tactical choice, it's a game now taken over by dominant strategy. But don't worry if there was any part of you left concerned their might be a chance you have to think or plan ahead, as spicy spray now applies to all your Pikmin at infinite distance, map wide! Sure, why not I guess!

Well speaking of DOMINANT strategy. We have to break down the elephant in the room. Our boy Oatchi. I want to like him, he's a good boy. Asymmetrical captains is a great Idea. But, he's just so good. He's TO good, he single handedly transforms Pikmin 4 from an RTS into a MOBA.

He is so strikingly overkill as a way to manage Pikmin it's shocking they didn't account for it. The managed chaos that I've called out as key to this series ceases to exist when you ride Oatchi. Boss and enemy patterns that once capitalized on the chaotic spread out nature of your Pikmin army as it follows you is rendered mute by this scrummy bingus. All your Pikmin are now packaged up part and parcel into a single unit that you control directly.

Man-at-legs machine gun got you down? Don't sweat, just pack up on Oatchi and run circles around him dodging every shot. Water in your way? No blues truly needed, just toss any Pikmin color into the lake off Oatchi's back and then call them back (rock Pikmin should really just die instantly if they touch water, they're a little to good when tossed off Oatchi). An entire series predicated on enemy and environmental hazard designs based around the presumption that you have an unruly clump of barely compliant children at your heel, but Oatchi so thoroughly solves the problem that you're just not playing a Pikmin game.

The frustrating thing is that it's not an unsalvageable idea. Oatchi just needed to be handled as a tradeoff with upsides and downsides. He already has some great tradeoffs that make sense! He can jump and the captain can't. He can't fit past grates but he CAN go in pipes. This is all good stuff! It adds new nuance to level design. So expanding upon this should be easy, no? Here, I'll start:

Oatchi can whistle, but let's change it so he can't throw. I mean he doesn't have hands, why can he do that anyhow? But in return he can use the Charge Horn! To balance this out, the captain can't use the Charge Horn but they have SWARM, giving him a unique tactical tradeoff incentive to switch between Oatchi and your captain. While we're at it, Oatchi can only carry roughly 10-20 Pikmin, making him useful for scouting and strike teams but not allowing him to render your entire Pikmin army immune to hazards, and making him worse at tackling bosses.

These would be some sensible balance tweaks! But they don't address the true pièce de résistance, the steaming pile sitting under this elephant that I've been waiting even longer to discuss. Oatchi's RUSH. The dominant strategy to end all dominant strategies. If you thought Pikmin 2 had a dominant strategy in the form of Purples, get ready to sweat. At least Purples were a coveted resource you were afraid to lose.

Oatchi's rush allows you to sprint forward and slam through / into obstacles. It's used for gating content in levels, but can also be used effectively in combat. It instantly kills many smaller enemies, and later on can even be upgraded to stun enemies and bosses similarly to purple Pikmin. It's low risk, high reward, as Oatchi takes little damage and can't permanently die. But none of this is the real problem, the real problem is that any Pikmin on Oatchi's back will instantly deathball onto the enemy or obstacle he hits. That's 100 Pikmin, of any color, all hitting an enemy simultaneously (while also stunning them!?). All the nuance and challenge of getting Pikmin onto the opponent in other ways by throwing, swarming, or even charging, can't survive being tactically compared to this.

In my entire playthrough there were almost no threats that could survive long enough when subjected to Oatchi's wrath to even attempt to fight back. Some bosses would be fell instantly by this (particularly when combined with my infinite pack of spicy sprays, which I can generously apply AFTER charging since they work from any distance) , let alone every normal enemy and threat in the game. This was it, this killed Pikmin 4. You don't need to think, just rush, it'll work out. If it's not reliable enough already, toss 20 or so ice Pikmin into the mix so that you can stack Oatchi's initial stun with a follow up icing. What, freezing erases the body and prevents Pikmin propagation? Doesn't matter, you'll only ever need 100 Pikmin since they will never die.

I really don't understand how this made it to ship. It has the same effect on Pikmin 4 as it would any game with an overwhelmingly dominant strategy. It makes it boring. I kind of like Oatchi, but looking at his scrummy little face unfortunately leaves me with a twinge of idle resentment I wish I didn't feel. I never have to ask "how will I kill this enemy?", there's only 1 answer. It turns fun into tedium. With so little resistance, Pikmin 4 quickly stops feeling like a game and starts feels like busy work. The Pikmin equivalent of power wash simulator.

And with that we've finished digging the grave for Pikmin's gameplay. It was a long road but we can finally brush our hands off and discuss the other half of this experience. The worldbuilding, art, presentation, story, and tone.

I just don't understand what this series is going for any longer. Soul may be a nearly meaningless buzzword that gets tossed around with quite a bit of abandon, but if there's anything I can say about Pikmin 1 and 2, it's that the soul of it's developers are on full display. It's a collective effect of the music, art, gamefeel, writing, the odd mechanics and enemies, the small surprising touches that give it character, everything. I feel the fingerprints of the people who made it. And I can tell they cared.

Pikmin 3 and 4 have a distinct corporate stink to them. It doesn't feel like it's being made by people who want to be there. It's cold and sterile. These are products that insisted upon themselves to be made. Everything about them mentally evokes rounded corners, crossed T's and dotted I's. Brand management, audience testing, shareholder appeasement. Miyamoto. There's a strict and enstrangling agenda to be unassuming, cute, unchallenging, light and low on stakes. To evoke only happy emotions and to eschew confusion or surprise.

The cute pup Oatchi, Pink Pikmin, happy sunshine basked forests. A colorful energetic cast of affable gormless goofballs who bumble in and out of problems and a looked up to heroic captain whom everyone knows and trusts guiding them. This isn't what I associate with Pikmin.

Pikmin was about strange inhospitable worlds, about the questionable moral quality of using others for personal gain and corporate greed. About finding comfort and solace in places you least expected it. About uphill battles and managed chaos. Pikmin evoked dark foreboding groves, strange creatures, and a put upon everyman with a scientific mind navigating it through wit and a sheer will to survive and see his family again. It evoked true emotions. You pushed forward because the plot and world compelled you to ask "will this turn out ok?" and "what nightmare will I run across next while trying to make sure it does?".

The stories of 3 and 4 lean on humor, contrivance, and dramatic irony. It's insultingly juvenile and completely lacking that smidge of depth and nuance that made the first two games timeless. The characters ask "where's Olimar", but you the player already know, he's right fucking there. There's nothing to worry about. It's played as a joke but leaves you with no driving cause or concern with which to press ahead, and no mystery to uncover. You know things will be fine. Characters flanderize into tropes of their former selves. Olimar is elevated to a pedestal and became even more competent, also I guess he's famous now (wasn't he just a trucker?), and he must always crash land so we can laugh because that's just what he does! Louie can't simply be a spacey and odd character who makes genuine mistakes, he has to be an agent of chaos who acts with true malice, working against the interests of and endangering the people around him.

The cast of 3 is friendly, affable, and inoffensive. I don't hate them, but they're not exactly interesting. And I never quite understood why they added new planets to the lore, it feels a bit contrived and unnecessary. But 4 really takes the cake with how it dilutes the lore, adding dozens of new random planets to the lexicon. These poor wiki writers. The cast is comprised of a vast array of dozens and dozens of colorful new characters all with the emotional content of a pile of sand. 4 Introduced a character creator, but then used that to generate all the supporting cast. It's understandable to fill out the survivor list with generative characters, but named primary characters I'm supposed to engage with are decently likely to look the same as the character you created. It's quite off-putting.

The game manages to make these new characters all the more unlikeable by forcing you through a sieve of excessive tutorials and dialogue scenes where they state the obvious, make vapid jokes, and literally tell you how useless they are as if it's supposed to be cute that they stand around and do nothing. These scenes never let up, and often come in batches of anywhere from 2 to 6 back to back, with some loading screens thrown in for good measure. Oh and don't forget that characters act as mandatory gateways you have to mash through to access the world map, check the Piklopedia, or turn in achievements. Yeah no way that will get old and leave me somehow resenting them even more. Doesn't help that menus and text have large mandatory delays so mashing through isn't even fast, either.

If that wasn't enough to get you to resent them, they constantly chime in to tell you how to play the game, disrespect your intelligence, and block 20% of your field of vision while making annoying noises. These messages are also incredibly repetitive and prescriptive for how the player should feel. I'm not allowed to have my own emotional response when I lose Pikmin, Colin must chime in literally every single time to make a sad face and tell me to feel bad... :( But don't worry we'll just prescribe that you travel back in time 30 seconds and save scum to fix it, because you're certainly also incapable of having the idea to reset your game of your own volition. You know part of what made this series compelling was how the first 2 games left you to contemplate how to feel about your exploitation of Pikmin. Olimar's plight in 1 evoked an extremely different feeling to the capitalistic exploitation of 2. But the game let you come to those conclusions on your own, and form a personal connection to your Pikmin. If you felt bad when they died, that was on you for having empathy, not something you were ever TOLD to feel.

Well never mind all that, there are sales figures to consider!

And how could I forget! This game randomly decided to retcon the past 3! I really have no words for why they would do this. There's nothing about the events of this game's plot that would have been incompatible with the stories of 1 through 3. But boy I sure am glad that the much more compelling stories of the series roots have been overwritten for this corporate drivel!

The levels in Pikmin 3 and 4 have failed to explore particularly new or interesting settings. Pikmin 1 remains the game with the most variety in terms of level theme and design. Nowhere else in the series is as dark, foreboding, and congested as The Forest Navel. Nowhere as open and serene as The Distant Spring. Nowhere as striking as the Wistful Wild or as quiet as the Valley of Repose in 2.

The most notable location in 3 or 4 is Hero's Hideaway. Finally a change of local the series really needed, but Pikmin 4 doesn't utilize the interior of a large house to communicate any sense of tension, nor does it amplify the once questionably apocalyptic nature of the world of Pikmin. Pikmin 4 uses this level to present a clean, sterile, safe, and welcoming location meant to make you go "awww it's like they're running around on my carpet!" rather than create compelling gameplay or narrative engagement. While also seeming almost tactically implemented to dissuade and debunk the idea that the world of Pikmin exists in a world where humanity has met it's downfall. I can basically hear Miyamoto telling his team to ensure it's clean as a way to rain on the fanbases parade and make sure they know that the world of Pikmin is a happy, welcoming place for all. And don't forget to visit Super Nintendo World at Universal Studios in sunny Hollywood, California!

Beyond this one level all the locations of 4 amount to some different flavor of "sunny forest or beach". They look pretty but I sure am bored. The final level in 4 initially peaks interest when it seems to be fungal themed, but once you dig your teeth in you'll find that it's merely another fairly mundane forest with like 3 mushroom themed enemies. I don't understand why it's so reserved, but it's not a very strong note to close 4 out on. Would it kill them to tear the chastity belt off and make something bold and fantastical? I would guess not but maybe it would have been to liberal for Miyamoto's brand integration.

Also the music sucks. It's really weird to be saying that about a first party Nintendo game. I just can't help but feel this really is indicative of how little anyone on this project was inspired to make this. The music is unremarkably passive and constrained. I fail to remember almost any of the music in 3 other than the main theme so perhaps I shouldn't be so surprised. The only highlights were whenever the soundtrack harkened back to better music in 1 or 2.

Oh and this game has the weakest offerings for multiplayer co-op of any game since the first, lacking any sort of mission/challenge mode or a way to play through the campaign with a friend. (for real, not little brother mode with the rocks or whatever that junk is) Frankly this isn't a big problem, and I say that because I gaurentee this game will get support later down the line and recieve these features in the form of an update or DLC. So I'll tweak this review to strike this passage out once that happens.

This game is OK. Sometimes I was sort of having fun. It's better than 3. But this isn't a promising vector on which the series will travel into the future. Even if the gameplay was fantastic and uncompromising in sticking to the series core tenants (which it isn't), I would be left feeling empty and lost from how little humanity and soul is present here. Am I out of touch? To cynical? Or is the praise 3 and 4 have received just indicative of a decline in critical appreciation of the arts? In an era where Nintendo has generally been bringing on fresh young talent and crafting inspired resonant refreshes of their flagship series, I don't know how Pikmin 4 happened. Was the A-team busy? Is Miyamoto's direction just that toxic? I'm just not sure.

Ultimately who cares right? It's just a product. Consume it, get your dopamine, fill out those checklists. But I can't help but feel something is lost here.

If replaying Blood Omen was bittersweet, this was an emotional roller coaster. I started out as enthusiastic about it as I had been during my first playthrough, but as it went on my heart slowly started to sink.

"Were the controls really this fucked when I played it all those years ago," I asked myself.
"Was the camera this unresponsive?"
"Were the jumping and combat this awkward?"
"An open-ended adventure game with no map? What is this, fucking Simon's Quest?"
"WHAT THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO DO, GAME?"

Then around the three-quarter mark when all the cool moves are unlocked and you're free to explore the splendidly dour land of Nosgoth, draped in its oppressive atmosphere backed by a sublimely moody soundtrack, we were so fucking back.

I can't bring myself to hate this game, even with all its egregious shortcomings. It's just too brilliantly presented with too many great ideas that, despite not always reaching their full (or sometimes even half of) their potential, are so commendable, especially for its time. It's "soul" in its purest, most distilled form, no pun intended.