Fuck this gacha game in particular for being the only Mario Kart game with Dixie Kong and Hammer Bro. They should be in a real Mario Kart.

also i only ever played the closed beta (saw the warning signs it would suck just from that alone) and did you know the original premium currency was emeralds, but then in the final they made them rubies? is that weird or what?

Like was this just a focus testing thing? They sent a survey for feedback at the end of the beta period, so was there enough of a public outcry that the world wanted to spend real money on fictional red gems instead of green ones? Since they're red, are they more fitting for a Mario game than green gems? The world may never know, unlike how the world knows this game is bad as one of the scant few objective truths on this great big globe.

FE3H budgeting

- Plot: $3
- Worldbuilding: $35
- Gameplay: $100
- 80% of the characters: $10000000
- Graphics: $15
- Soundtrack: $20

Someone who is good at game development help me my family is dying

Not really sure what possessed me to play Metroid Prime: Federation Force in 2022 other than morbid curiosity but wow, I really tried to go into this with an open mind and it is simply fucking dull. Without a doubt the worst Metroid game I've played. Other M was at least really interesting in the myriad ways it was bad and the twitchy action could be fun at times even taking into account the boneheaded decision to map everything to the sideways Wiimote.

This game takes the worst aspect of the original Metroid Prime games, the combat, and just sort of slaps it into a mission based, exploration-less, progression-less action shooter. I will say that I played this solo (as if any of my friends were buying a copy of Federation Force in 2022, lol), which I'm sure does take some enjoyment out of an experience that is clearly focused on co-op, but the way that the game is designed I don't feel like I missed much. Even Metroid Prime Hunters had the sense to give each character their own flair, in this game, you and anyone you might somehow manage to get to play with you get the basic beam/charge beam/missiles and a couple of other extremely throwaway elemental shot types to take on a grand total of around 5 basic enemy types and the occasional boss or miniboss. The level design doesn't even make for interesting shooting arenas, oftentimes enemies will be given all sorts of elevated terrain to leap around on that your stumpy jump can't reach, restricting you to a flat featureless plane on the ground to circle strafe in.

The blocky, chibi character designs obliterate any sense of atmosphere the game might try to build, though the bland, C-rate movie soundtrack was already doing a good enough job of that on its own. The final boss fight with Samus might be a bigger offense to her character even than Other M, where you get to see her brainwashed, hit with a growth ray that hilariously has been one of the main focuses of the bone dry, vapid plot up to this point, and then slowly, aimlessly roll around as a giant morph ball for 15 minutes as you try and take potshots at her with your dinky normal beam because anything else is not going to be accurate enough to hit her weak spot.

I kind of was hoping to come away with this having found a hidden gem, because I love Next Level Games. Every other game they've made has been at the very least "quite good" and Luigi's Mansion 3 is one of my favorite Switch games. Between Luigi, Punch-Out, and Mario Strikers, they seem to be genuinely passionate about the projects they choose to take on. I'm shocked so see how wrong it all went here and how soulless this entire project feels. Glad to see both Next Level and the Metroid series in a much better place now.

...If Stylux is really the main antagonist of Prime 4 hoo boy Retro is going to have to pull off a miracle to make me give a shit about what's going on with him