140 Reviews liked by bootymouse


It’s easy to see why this is often considered the best entry of the series. The story is compelling and more grounded than those of the other Saints Row games. The setting of the game, Stilwater, is a very thoughtfully crafted open world environment. Despite the brain dead AI and the general aura of jankness, the gameplay loop is still fun enough to make you want to keep playing.

i don't know what it is about this game or maybe it's my adhd but there is something so gripping about this. numbers go up . i've never finished it/completed the main quests and i don't think i ever will but i've spent over 70 hours in this game doing....... stuff. it's not something i think i'd solely dedicate my time to but as something to idly play on the side while i watch tv, it's pretty good.
edit: i actually finally finished it. thoughts are the same.

I thoroughly enjoyed this game but the way it just throws you in with like 0 handholding makes this game infinitely overwhelming at times. The first 40 hours there was not a single moment where I didn't have atleast six things to keep track of, with a dozen wiki pages open. But after hour 40 it slows down to the point of being just a waiting game for the next opportunity to do something without ever finding an even middle ground. Definitely fun and would recommend to some people, but only those who are well adept at getting stressed at games lol.

The camera is completely awful and nauseating. The core gameplay loop is alright, but gets extremely repetitive once you get some workers. I don't really see what the end goal is (getting the last HQ?), so there's no real motivation to play, other than seeing your money go up.

the camera is so annoying, i barely finished the first contract and rage quit it

isn’t it weird how the game called “quest for balance” has balancing issues?

If you told me this was a licensed game from 15 years ago, I'd believe you without a second thought. This game feels like it fell through a wormhole and has absolutely no business having come out in 2023.

The vast majority of the gameplay is puzzles, at least half of which are sliding block puzzles. There's a sliding puzzle boss fight. I can get behind a nice sliding block puzzle every now and then, but right now, I don't think I ever want to see one for a good long while. I really don't mind the idea of using all the different elements to creatively solve some puzzles, but they're just so tedious here.

The combat has a sort of beat em up style, and it's incredibly clunky. It's very easy to stunlock enemies and hit them until they die, with them being unable to do anything. It is equally easy for this to happen to you. Neither of these is fun. Boss fights do not fare much better.

This game is also completely broken. I had to quit and reload during the final boss because a button prompt would not leave the screen and would not respond when that button was pressed. Party members you are not controlling will repeatedly walk into fire. Subtitles are incorrectly timed. There are typos. You can walk on walls if you feel so inclined. The first combustion man fight was running at a cool 2 fps. Characters will address characters who are not present. Sometimes the correct character will pop into existence and then vanish, sometimes even that won't happen. During a race, the game will just sometimes decide you have been hit when you absolutely haven't. Everything is janky as hell, and it was almost fun to see how bad it could get.

And finally, this is also a bizarre adaptation of the show. The framing device is ok, but the choice of which parts to adapt was puzzling. Leaving out things like where the hell the gang met toph but keeping stuff like collecting pentapuses is just odd. A person who hasn't seen the show will be lost and a person who has will be frustrated that they aren't seeing so many iconic moments. It's a lose-lose situation.

All in all, this game has glimmers of effort shining through, but it is ultimately a game for nobody.

the funniest thing is when i first played this i was like, i dont get it. then one day the brainworms in my head said "yes, you like this" & i said yes. i love this.

When I was in kindergarten, our computer lab instructor never actually taught us anything. Instead, she just let us play Kid Pix all day. One day, she disappeared and was replaced by someone else. Years later, I found out that she got arrested for embezzling money from the school. Anyways, Kid Pix is great.

Adobe out here making people pay 12$ for Photoshop and like 100$+ for everything else a month and not even ONE of their suite of programs has a Dynamite Button

Ah, Microsoft 3D Pinball, one of the most influential games of my life

I've always been a big fan of the old Maxis SimCitys.
SimCity 3000 is like an expansion, with improved graphics, of the already incredible 2000.
Age does weigh it down, though. Don't expect to find here all the hundreds of road layout options that exist in SimCity 4: Rush Hour or Cities Skylines.
However, the game delivers a good level of fun and challenge within its limitations. In 1999, there was nothing like it.

great simulator but they forgot to make it fun

Why did everyone, myself included, have a copy of the game?

Me and my best friend used to play this on her computer in middle school and we’d always choose random boy students and change their names to that of our current crush, and then proceed to follow said student around the school the next hour or so.
Also the whimsy of the classroom designs in the game has yet to be matched by anything else.