chemergency
1992
An impressive achievement for running on SNES unaided by any enhancement chip, but with the censorship and goofy sound effects it really feels like Wolfenstein: Playskool Edition.
2023
Despite its lack of polish in a few areas and some padding in its sidequests, Rogue City is a lovingly-crafted game adaptation of one of the best movies ever with some awesome gunplay reminiscent of F.E.A.R. and some handsome-looking environments that are fun to explore if you're a fan of the source material (and let's face it who doesn't love RoboCop 1?). Teyon's certainly come a long way from that crappy Rambo rail shooter they made a decade ago.
It truly is a shame how quickly this once-promising reboot series has been driven into the ground and its playerbase's goodwill tarnished by Activision's greedy business practices, Infinity Ward's tonedeaf writing (the members of Task Force 141 are iconic and they deserve better than to be treated like the cast of a low-budget capeshit TV series), and consistently-asinine design choices complete with yet-another obnoxious UI. Hopefully this shit finally comes to an end soon with Bobby Kotick no-longer at the helm but I wouldn't count on it.
The only redeeming quality about this entry is that the vast majority of its maps are lifted directly from the seminal 2009 version of Modern Warfare 2, but I'm really annoyed that the previous game's maps don't carry-over given that they now share the same client and gobble-up an insane amount of storage space.
The only redeeming quality about this entry is that the vast majority of its maps are lifted directly from the seminal 2009 version of Modern Warfare 2, but I'm really annoyed that the previous game's maps don't carry-over given that they now share the same client and gobble-up an insane amount of storage space.
1994
An interesting, if flawed tower defense action game that sees the player taking the role of Kirk Cameron (and no, I'm not kidding that really is him lmao) building a town and keeping his folks fed while occasionally fighting orcs that show-up attempting to undo your progress. Sounds like fun on paper though the technical constraints of the 3DO and some awkward controls and combat stifle its potential somewhat.
A janky, third-rate Tony Hawk clone, though not without some novelty in its stage design and bonus content.
2023
The fact that so many people fell for this scam hook, line, and sinker gives me very little hope that any positive change will ever make its way to the industry soon, so-long as the gullible and ignorant continue to support unqualified assclowns and their empty promises en masse.
1998
A considerably-rough and unpolished, but fascinatingly-ambitious open-world action game the likes of which wouldn't become commonplace for a whole 'nother console generation.
1999
A nominal improvement over its predecessor in-terms of polish and control, though its gameplay loop and map are still a bit dull if the original didn't win you over with its formula or concept. GTAIII feels like it has more in-common with Body Harvest on the N64 which I could see more fans of modern GTA being able to appreciate over the archaic and primitive top-down entries on PS1.
An unoriginal, but fun and competently-made co-op shooter for fans of the source material.
2023
Maybe in this instance Starfield was merely a victim of feature creep over the course of a protracted development cycle, but I personally think the space setting should be avoided for this genre going forward until the devs/engines find a way to lift exploration elements wholesale from games like No Man's Sky or Outer Wilds. Otherwise there's just not much way to make it feel like more than a third-rate clone of Mass Effect 1 from 16 years ago aside from having better writing, better lore, and a better atmosphere than this and The Outer Worlds anyway. I will give it credit for having a relatively polished launch and nice gunplay by Bethesda game standards though, it's just too bad all the things surrounding it feel like aimless busywork even moreso than Fallout 4's settlement building.
1997
Though GTA1 has some very cool, forward-thinking ideas that would serve as the foundation of the now-iconic franchise as well as a sharp presentation with great sound design, its disorienting overhead perspective, awkward controls and sluggish car handling, confusing map design, and nauseating camera make it very hard to go back and enjoy without a preexisting nostalgic attachment.
2012
Much of Far Cry 3's retrospective appeal lies in its surprisingly-compelling story and characters that still stand the test of time, even after its gameplay formula has been regurgitated many times by contemporaries both within and outside of its associated franchise. It does help that its gameplay elements mesh together with a level of focus and structure to make pursuing its story a lot more fun and engaging than any of its successors have managed thus-far.
Its hilariously-poor presentation and abundance of game-breaking bugs are a hoot for the uninitiated, but you wouldn't want to be caught dead actually trying to play this through to completion. Count your blessings that this shovelware stinker's long since been delisted from Steam.
A truly catastrophic attempt to break into the AAA gaming space from a studio simply not equipped or qualified to build a game that can rival the likes of Monolith's Middle Earth games. This is the reason a number of games simply don't make it to the finish line and see the light of day. I honestly thought this was quietly cancelled several years ago and in-retrospect, maybe it should have been. I wish I were kidding when I state that this is modern gaming's closest equivalent to Superman 64.
Total buttsauce that looks and plays like shovelware from 2003. To its credit it's at-least short and not full-priced unlike this year's other notorious licensed game- Gollum. It's still not worth your time or money in any metric though and you'd be much better off revisiting the 2005 Ubisoft King Kong game to get your "monke" fix. In fact coming to the realization that this emerged from the same publisher responsible for none-other than Big Rigs should tell you everything you need to know.