The decision to not give the initial Super Mario Bros. 2 (The Lost Levels) its own unique identity was a neglectful and hasty one. The immense success of the first title caught Nintendo in an aimless frenzy and what we would get was the best they had to work with. While not developed at first with Mario in mind, Super Mario Bros. 2 USA would have such a profound impact on the Mario franchise nonetheless that it's almost difficult not to view it as an authentic Mario game nowadays.
As you sit down and play it, however, all that background you've probably heard time and again ends up failing to make up for the unreal amount of JANK that is there within. Spawning of enemies for example is a huge problem, where an enemy you're expecting to see either doesn't spawn at all or even respawns a mere inch off screen right after you've already killed them. Collision feels particularly unfair and unforgiving, making it a nightmare to maneuver around its more crowded levels. Topped with awkward movement, I often felt like I was fighting the controls rather than the enemies and bosses themselves.
While not as excruciating as The Lost Levels, it serves not as an exceptional title, but only a historically significant one and little else.

I actually liked this a lot, which surprised me since I wasn't the biggest fan of Remake. Maybe it's because I like Yuffie more than the Midgar cast, or maybe it's because Square wasn't trying to stretch the story out more than they needed to, but I surprisingly enjoyed the story. Without going into spoiler territory while still wildly speculating about a game yet to release, I like how they gave Yuffie a much stronger motivation for eventually joining up with Cloud's party than the one she had in the original FF7. Also if she's even half as fun to play in Rebirth as she is here, then it'll at least be a pretty decent game based on combat alone.

If the moogle hoodie isn't an optional outfit in Rebirth I'm going to riot.

Never has a game gotten me so invested in its world surrounding it. Never has any piece of fiction, really. In most games, maybe only bar Horizon Zero Dawn, when you find a random note collectible or listen to an audio log, I almost always ignore them. They're usually just filler and ultimately unimportant. But Mass Effect proved to me that they don't have to be that way, and I read through and listened to just about damn near everything I could, stopping to exhaust all dialogue options whenever available. The worldbuilding is genuinely phenomenal and I can say with certainty that this is the coolest fictional universe I've ever experienced and likely will ever experience. Most of this is just do to the writing, its great. It can be humorous, witty, introspective or just about any other good sounding adjective you can think of and its just about always compelling. Characters like Liara, my love and Garrus, my bestie and Thane, my other love (and basically just about everyone else besides Jacob, fuck you Jacob) are fantastic to be around and really help make the world feel alive and The Normandy feel like a home. The combat is kind of shit, and the driving around in the Mako in the first game left a lot to be desired. The simplification of mechanics over the series was a little upsetting. The animations in dialogue/action sequences can be a bit jarring and mess up the tone of things. The ending had more potential than what was got out of it. All those problems are present here and a lot of it can be very noticeable. But even then? this series was still amazing and every of the honestly many problems mean jack shit in comparison to the sheer quality of everything else. This feels like I'm rambling now so this is the end. One final thing: The romance with Liara is the peak of the lesbian human-alien connection. Getting to tell her that you love her in the third game damn near broke my heart.

It was an honor serving with you Commander Shepard.

Nancyfly certified Top 10 game of all time
- 99/100

Please note that Super Animal Royale was my first Battle Royale game.
This huge explosion of Battle Royale games in the late 2010's was fleeting almost as soon as it began, and now it's looked back on in retrospect as a fad with little room in its formula for shakeups to help its longevity. Super Animal Royale was a game made to put its own spin on the Battle Royale genre. It does this by having an isometric view, vector graphics art style, and consisting of cute animals as your playable characters. Despite these distinctions however, it still doesn't do much to justify itself, and feels like a cheap means to trend-chase.

The first thing that immediately stood out to me was how slapdash and lazy the graphics and animation looked. It's very reminiscent of the "corporate artstyle" that's so common nowadays. But where the lack of inspiration really shows through is in its repetition. You have a huge variety of animals, and an endless supply of cosmetics, yet they're all the exact same character model. The 'Quantity Over Quality' approach was taken to their character design. Potentially dozens of different animal designs could be pumped out and rendered into the game in a matter of minutes. At least the map, depending on which area you're in, is a bit more impressive in terms of detail; I just still find it to be visually unimaginative and nothing to write home about.

Repetition unfortunately digs deep into the gameplay as well. While you do have alternative game modes like Bwoking Dead, we can all agree the main attraction is its Main Survival Mode. There's only one huge map, and areas of that map are shuffled at random for every match. Once you figure out the meta, or even get good with whatever weapon you main, there's no stopping you from going for that same area and weapon every time to almost guarantee winning.

The worst part about it all is that enhancing the overall experience was as simple as emphasizing the absurdity of cute animals killing each other with actual guns. The game could play up the juxtaposition - cute innocent animals paired with cold bloody gun violence and murder. An award winning gimmick was right there in plain sight and it was squandered. That may not have ever been the artistic vision for this game, but at least that's my ideal Super Animal Royale aesthetic.

Overall, Super Animal Royale in my opinion completely fails to impress. It was a pathetic attempt at a battle royale game that made seemingly no impact. Say what you will about PUBG and Fortnite. For better or for worse, those games will be remembered. And Super Animal Royale is free to play.
I only found writing this review necessary because of the embarrassing amount of time I regret having wasted on it.