Macklemore
2017
I'm sure that if this game was in the hands of more competent videogame developers, it would actively get me interested in the story more and I would probably take my sweet ass time reading the logs and all that. It wouldn't be hard to make me interested in logs, Resident Evil 5 managed to do it. Half of the interest comes from the logs being from a franchise I hold near and dear to my heart but the other half is due to game being interesting and enjoyable enough to the point where I felt the need to know more about the story. And the other 33% is Albert Wesker being fuh-knee. (Dees Dude went from talking about halves to thirds, what a JERK!)
Did this game even have sound design? Lance Reddick was in it. RIP, he was my favourite Reddit. I wish this game wasn't just a simulator to walk across the planet. Guys that I talked to two seconds ago that I had to run 3000 ingame steps toward tell me "I'm glad you came here. Let's continue this conversation over there" as he points behind me. I turn to see where he was pointing. By the time I turn my head back to him, he's gone. My quest marker says I need to move 3000 ingame steps back where I came from. I laugh, but the joke wasn't funny.
I love fighting sponges with no AI, cause there's something really cool in a videogame where you arbitrarily take the right amount of steps backward that bugs the thing you're fighting from moving as it just stares at you while you pelt it with arrows for sixteen years.
I can't wait to play the next videogame in this series where Aloy grows hair on her cheeks and has a red stain on her underwear, and she has IBS and
Did this game even have sound design? Lance Reddick was in it. RIP, he was my favourite Reddit. I wish this game wasn't just a simulator to walk across the planet. Guys that I talked to two seconds ago that I had to run 3000 ingame steps toward tell me "I'm glad you came here. Let's continue this conversation over there" as he points behind me. I turn to see where he was pointing. By the time I turn my head back to him, he's gone. My quest marker says I need to move 3000 ingame steps back where I came from. I laugh, but the joke wasn't funny.
I love fighting sponges with no AI, cause there's something really cool in a videogame where you arbitrarily take the right amount of steps backward that bugs the thing you're fighting from moving as it just stares at you while you pelt it with arrows for sixteen years.
I can't wait to play the next videogame in this series where Aloy grows hair on her cheeks and has a red stain on her underwear, and she has IBS and
1987
Kinda funny how intuitive this game is for a gaijin such as myself. I did play this translated in English, but I find it peculiar how a good murder mystery game (of which there are many on the NES) managed to make it on the console, but only in Japan.
2019
I liked pressing a button and having my samurai deflect bullets.
1988
Despite my constant yelps that this game was unbeatable, I constantly found myself ChudBewildered at the fact that the area was at, was in fact, beatable. Last checkpoint of the game by the way? Actually unbeatable, for anyone but me that is. I somehow managed to do it.
This review contains spoilers
I liked starting this game and being under the belief that Black Mask would be the main villain of the story. That would be so cool, an under represented villain, with a cool look, (cause skeletons always make for cool designs, obviously), who was only in Arkham City for 1 millisecond having a game where he's the main villa- Wait, is that the Joker?
The moment I found out this was a prequel, I immediately knew they were going to bring the Joker in some capacity. Whether it was by giving a short cameo, or a segment where you fight him, I knew he was gonna be there. I definitely did not expect him to be the main villain AND Black Mask at that. Wow, I didn't want Black Mask in this game at all, I wanted him to be a clown on the inside just as much as I was made a clown on the outside! Villains are yet again wasted, Deathstroke, Deadshot, and Shiva offered less problem than Copperhead and Firefly. Deadshot and Shiva aren't even part of the main game, they're a sidequest that you can totally choose to ignore if you wish. I didn't, because I like both characters. All things considered, I should have probably avoided them. They didn't even get their own cutscenes. Sad, wasted potential. Shout-out to the one Mad Hatter sequence where you traverse an Alice in Wonderland style dreamworld. I got spoiled that Arkham Knight will have more of Scarecrow, so I'm quite hyped for that at least.
All in all, Arkham Origins is more of Arkham City, but noticeably worse. I applaud the fact that the core gameplay is kept, and the fact that the same weapons are retained (even though in this case it wouldn't make sense cause its a prequel?), but I dislike the fact that the game felt sloppier. The gliding was worse, the ragdoll physics of the bodies being punched around was noticeably wonkier cause I had people punched miles away by Batman, trying to counter two people at once barely worked when in City it worked perfectly, and... something was missing. I could chalk it up to bad PC ports, I could chalk it up to the game changing developers, but all I know is that it just wasn't the same no matter how similar it felt.
Also there are no sexy Harley Quinn outfits in this game, so it felt like a slog going through this game hoping for the best. She does appear, but she's boring ol' Harleen Quinzel. This is around the time video games started going woke, I suppose. Le sigh
The moment I found out this was a prequel, I immediately knew they were going to bring the Joker in some capacity. Whether it was by giving a short cameo, or a segment where you fight him, I knew he was gonna be there. I definitely did not expect him to be the main villain AND Black Mask at that. Wow, I didn't want Black Mask in this game at all, I wanted him to be a clown on the inside just as much as I was made a clown on the outside! Villains are yet again wasted, Deathstroke, Deadshot, and Shiva offered less problem than Copperhead and Firefly. Deadshot and Shiva aren't even part of the main game, they're a sidequest that you can totally choose to ignore if you wish. I didn't, because I like both characters. All things considered, I should have probably avoided them. They didn't even get their own cutscenes. Sad, wasted potential. Shout-out to the one Mad Hatter sequence where you traverse an Alice in Wonderland style dreamworld. I got spoiled that Arkham Knight will have more of Scarecrow, so I'm quite hyped for that at least.
All in all, Arkham Origins is more of Arkham City, but noticeably worse. I applaud the fact that the core gameplay is kept, and the fact that the same weapons are retained (even though in this case it wouldn't make sense cause its a prequel?), but I dislike the fact that the game felt sloppier. The gliding was worse, the ragdoll physics of the bodies being punched around was noticeably wonkier cause I had people punched miles away by Batman, trying to counter two people at once barely worked when in City it worked perfectly, and... something was missing. I could chalk it up to bad PC ports, I could chalk it up to the game changing developers, but all I know is that it just wasn't the same no matter how similar it felt.
Also there are no sexy Harley Quinn outfits in this game, so it felt like a slog going through this game hoping for the best. She does appear, but she's boring ol' Harleen Quinzel. This is around the time video games started going woke, I suppose. Le sigh
1987
They should've sticked to making top down shooters in this era. Not even plane autists would love this one.
1986
I can feel the music, I can taste the 80s in the air, I am transported to the golden era of arcade games. There is a sense of mystery, darkness and danger, while also enjoying the nostalgia of 8 bit graphics, an epic score and the simple yet fun gameplay. I truly feel like I am in the world of Castlevania with this experience.
2009
Sexy tummies
2017
Mario is a little overweight, and his princess obsession is getting old. Bowser is a rapist icon. This game was pretty good but so much of it was insanely easy to the point where I don't know when I was playing the game and when the game was playing itself. Should it feel like that? Is that what fun is? Getting to the goal without actually exerting yourself?
Did I smile? Multiple times. I would even LOL if Mario's nipples could break diamonds in the ice level. But I don't know if the win was earned. Where were the hard bosses?
Can't believe Nintendo finally hired the man to make the dinosaur and the dragon. Were these choices made by the man or did Nintendo tell the man to make lizards. Why is he so good at lizards specifically? Must investigate further.
Did I smile? Multiple times. I would even LOL if Mario's nipples could break diamonds in the ice level. But I don't know if the win was earned. Where were the hard bosses?
Can't believe Nintendo finally hired the man to make the dinosaur and the dragon. Were these choices made by the man or did Nintendo tell the man to make lizards. Why is he so good at lizards specifically? Must investigate further.
This game has the most realistic boxing game mechanics as it involves getting punched in the face repeatedly, but you do get to dodge the punches to be able to punch the other guy in the face repeatedly till he gets punched in the face. Sometimes there is even a punching animation for one of the opponents. It's crazy. I think I am going to punch the screen now.
(Game is good up until you get to Super Macho Man and then it becomes bullshit. I guess it was the only way for you to beat up so many ethnicities back in the day, so people found charm in it or something.)
(Game is good up until you get to Super Macho Man and then it becomes bullshit. I guess it was the only way for you to beat up so many ethnicities back in the day, so people found charm in it or something.)
2024
It was a bold choice for Nintendo to market their E-for-Everyone franchises to the 18+ audience. The game was criticized for its heavy handed, almost comical tone. Although the voice acting and art direction were lauded the game was largely forgettable despite its unique premise. Nintendo fans should be happy to know a sequel will never see the light of day.
Where was Da Earth Vader? Where was Luke SkypeWalker? I wanted to see so many of my favourite Star Wars characters, but I didn't really get to see any of them.
2012
A touching and sometimes frightening tale of human emotion and our fight against our own darkest desires
1987
The hardest game on the NES. 5 stars given to myself for beating it.
Game spoiled me on Sonic Frontiers. I could never forg
ive it.
RIP Sonic, can't wait for Easter until you resurrect (3 days from now)
ive it.
RIP Sonic, can't wait for Easter until you resurrect (3 days from now)