cmcpowerz
9 reviews liked by cmcpowerz
Silent Hill
1999
"harry mason introduced the everyman to survival horror" "as an ordinary man harry mason can't take many hits and struggles with firearms" my man is standing here nailing headshots with hunting rifles like it's nothing. he's getting pounced on by flesh gorillas, mauled, and then crawling out like he just took a scratch. he's surviving electrocution and then nailing noscopes like it's easy. and there's no question he's been doing his cardio as well, sprinting across an entire town while barely breaking a sweat. barely loses his composure until a lady literally turns into a blood demon in front of him. even then he takes a second to sit with it and then starts running around literal bizarro world again as if nothing happened. what does chris redfield have that harry doesn't?
when I played silent hill 2 I managed to self-impose the dread and anxiety required to fully immerse myself in the dilapidated corridors and alleys of the titular town. not so much this time. my friends/roommates were really into watching this one so I rarely played this one alone in the dark like I did its sequel, and I played the game accordingly. lots of riffing and plenty of laughs at the stilted dialogue, creepy setpieces, and oddball puzzles. when I got to the lighthouse I was really having to strain my tank controls prowess to run up the spiral staircase, and as a bit I made a couple other people try it to prove I wasn't crazy; I'll always remember that shit.
but I can't deny that when I played this alone for a bit in the otherworld version of the school, even as I worried that I couldn't remember how to envelope myself in that fear, I could feel those telltale signs occurring. the tightening of the chest, and that prickle in the throat letting me know that the imagery of strung-up bodies and rusty grating were starting to make me anxious. even with few prior antecedents that managed to capture this disgust and visceral psychological torment within the digital world they managed to perfectly envision it on such limited hardware. scenes like the rows of windmills placed in the middle of nowhere after the caterpillar fight or something as simple as covered corpses on beds in the hospital convey sickness and decay without hesitation. the lighting as well, from the muggy daytime streets to the narrow beam of the flashlight control the player's gaze so perfectly, unsettling them as they dare to peek into a corner or open yet another door.
what perhaps surprised me the most was the game's structure. from back to front the game isn't particularly long, and unlike its sequel the actual dungeon sections are much less heavily emphasized. these locations in silent hill 2 contain heavy story significance and a much stronger sense of relevance to james' history and mental state in comparison to the school and the hospital, which serve more functional purposes to harry than thematic ones. the rooms as well feel much more cookie-cutter by comparison, with fewer key areas of interest and more vessels to contain keys of various shapes. where this game succeeds in disorienting the player most is in the ever-shifting locality of the places you visit. building floors that disappear, bathrooms that exit on different floors than you entered on, and entire city streets melting away before your very eyes; all of this culminates in the nowhere, where previous areas are stitched together into a dizzying maze detached from any semblance of reality.
silent hill also has significantly better puzzle design than its follow-up thanks to the lack of any sort of item combination feature. keys are keys, no need to weld multiple random items together to get to the next area. instead the progression feels much more directly drawn from resident evil, with a mixture of fun little brainteasers and lock-and-key matching. surprisingly these appear very little in the second half of the game, assuming that you totally skip the kaufmann side quest as I did (thought I looked around a good deal and yet totally missed the bar, and as soon as you walk down the street on the boardwalk you're completely locked out of this whole section unfortunately). past the hospital there's quite a while of just running past hordes of enemies completely incapable of keeping up with you: in the town center, the sewers, the dock on the way to the lighthouse, and then the sewers again. not really an issue considering you still get to take in the sights regardless, but I would've preferred a little more "dungeon-crawling" so to speak.
when I first tried this game years ago the clunky combat and controls threw me off, and if you feel like you're in this boat take some time to get used to it and explore. items are ridiculously common and taking damage usually yields little risk provided you keep tabs on your health. although I didn't use the strafe at all and barely touched the backjump, overall these are some super tight controls. would not blame anyone for trying the second game first and then coming back to this one like I did.
when I played silent hill 2 I managed to self-impose the dread and anxiety required to fully immerse myself in the dilapidated corridors and alleys of the titular town. not so much this time. my friends/roommates were really into watching this one so I rarely played this one alone in the dark like I did its sequel, and I played the game accordingly. lots of riffing and plenty of laughs at the stilted dialogue, creepy setpieces, and oddball puzzles. when I got to the lighthouse I was really having to strain my tank controls prowess to run up the spiral staircase, and as a bit I made a couple other people try it to prove I wasn't crazy; I'll always remember that shit.
but I can't deny that when I played this alone for a bit in the otherworld version of the school, even as I worried that I couldn't remember how to envelope myself in that fear, I could feel those telltale signs occurring. the tightening of the chest, and that prickle in the throat letting me know that the imagery of strung-up bodies and rusty grating were starting to make me anxious. even with few prior antecedents that managed to capture this disgust and visceral psychological torment within the digital world they managed to perfectly envision it on such limited hardware. scenes like the rows of windmills placed in the middle of nowhere after the caterpillar fight or something as simple as covered corpses on beds in the hospital convey sickness and decay without hesitation. the lighting as well, from the muggy daytime streets to the narrow beam of the flashlight control the player's gaze so perfectly, unsettling them as they dare to peek into a corner or open yet another door.
what perhaps surprised me the most was the game's structure. from back to front the game isn't particularly long, and unlike its sequel the actual dungeon sections are much less heavily emphasized. these locations in silent hill 2 contain heavy story significance and a much stronger sense of relevance to james' history and mental state in comparison to the school and the hospital, which serve more functional purposes to harry than thematic ones. the rooms as well feel much more cookie-cutter by comparison, with fewer key areas of interest and more vessels to contain keys of various shapes. where this game succeeds in disorienting the player most is in the ever-shifting locality of the places you visit. building floors that disappear, bathrooms that exit on different floors than you entered on, and entire city streets melting away before your very eyes; all of this culminates in the nowhere, where previous areas are stitched together into a dizzying maze detached from any semblance of reality.
silent hill also has significantly better puzzle design than its follow-up thanks to the lack of any sort of item combination feature. keys are keys, no need to weld multiple random items together to get to the next area. instead the progression feels much more directly drawn from resident evil, with a mixture of fun little brainteasers and lock-and-key matching. surprisingly these appear very little in the second half of the game, assuming that you totally skip the kaufmann side quest as I did (thought I looked around a good deal and yet totally missed the bar, and as soon as you walk down the street on the boardwalk you're completely locked out of this whole section unfortunately). past the hospital there's quite a while of just running past hordes of enemies completely incapable of keeping up with you: in the town center, the sewers, the dock on the way to the lighthouse, and then the sewers again. not really an issue considering you still get to take in the sights regardless, but I would've preferred a little more "dungeon-crawling" so to speak.
when I first tried this game years ago the clunky combat and controls threw me off, and if you feel like you're in this boat take some time to get used to it and explore. items are ridiculously common and taking damage usually yields little risk provided you keep tabs on your health. although I didn't use the strafe at all and barely touched the backjump, overall these are some super tight controls. would not blame anyone for trying the second game first and then coming back to this one like I did.
Virginia
2016
There are 1-star and 4-star reviews of this and they're all correct.
Rollerdrome
2022
The premise for Rollerdrome is absurd on the surface, but it is actually incredibly indicative of the game's design philosophy.
Rollerdrome, simply, is the most unique interpretation of the movement shooter that we've seen yet. Where most games in the subgenre (Doom Eternal, Quake, Ultrakill, etc.) rely upon similar modes of transport, Rollerdrome flips the script. Instead of iterating and expanding upon FPS controls (a movement shooter), it brings shooting to the base of skating games (a movement shooter).
The entire game is so tightly designed from start to finish, and you can see all it has to offer within a few hours. The game then leaves the decision on whether to push the combat to it's limits up to the player. It's a killer game in every way.
Rollerdrome, simply, is the most unique interpretation of the movement shooter that we've seen yet. Where most games in the subgenre (Doom Eternal, Quake, Ultrakill, etc.) rely upon similar modes of transport, Rollerdrome flips the script. Instead of iterating and expanding upon FPS controls (a movement shooter), it brings shooting to the base of skating games (a movement shooter).
The entire game is so tightly designed from start to finish, and you can see all it has to offer within a few hours. The game then leaves the decision on whether to push the combat to it's limits up to the player. It's a killer game in every way.
Rollerdrome
2022
GOTY 2022 & '21 - Number 5
(The video version of this is here)
Look, there's something wrong with my judgement. "Character action" games have never done it for me. Devil May Cry, Bayonetta, Ninja Gaiden. I just don't feel a connection between my button inputs and the mad flips and spins on-screen. Maybe that's because so much of my comfort is found in a completely different kind of action game - extreme sports. Games where jumps and spins are intrinsically linked to control and level design.
I didn't have faith that Rollerdrome would be any good when I first saw it. I've seen games offer the world on a plate with their concepts, but when you actually play them, they're something like My Friend Pedro. Gimmicky nonsense that leans hard on a couple wild moves that look good in trailers. Rollerdrome does not fall victim to this, and it's likely because roll7 understand extreme sports games. Tony Hawk's Pro Skater is often painted as just a good skateboarding game, but it's a massive success in designing a game that emphasizes points and combos with truly 3D gameplay. Something where environmental structure was really important, and had to be learned and mastered to squeeze out its full potential. That's the bones of Rollerdrome, with Hotline Miami and Quake III as its muscle and flesh.
This is a combo-based arena shooter where you fire sniper shots at jetpack guys and fuchikomas while backflipping off quarterpipes. It's a concept too cool to ever work, but it does. Momentum-based propulsion is the key. You're not steering while aiming. You set off in a direction and then line up your shot. If you need to make a sharp turn, you roll out of it. Rollerdrome makes judicious use of bullet time, and you don't have to worry about safe landings. You always land on your wheels, but lining up sequences that keep your flow going is always preferable. Remove any of these elements, and you'd have an unplayable mess with ideas above its system, but packaged together like this, it's a joy. Grinding and wallriding while steadying long-range shots across the map and pulling the trigger at the perfect moment - that's the game working at its full potential.
I don't know if a lot of people will connect with the game in the way I did, but as someone whose reliance on Tony Hawk's verges on the chemical, it's captivating to add so many new variables to the formula. Combos aren't about connecting sequences of tricks, but a series of kills. Tricks are there to regain your ammo. There's no real-world logic to the systems, and that's something to be lauded. You can learn a level inside out - where each new spawn will be, the most effective weapons against each enemy type, and the most efficient ways to line up combos - but there's so many dynamic little nuances to each part, I don't know if you could ever mathematically work out a formula and have each part of Rube Goldberg chain fall into place perfectly. There's always an aspect of flying by the seat of your pants. I have a path through Tony Hawk's 2's School 2 that's set in stone, but I don't know if I could ever get into that state of semi-conscious playing while revisiting a Rollerdrome level. It's a much looser, less predictable game. Don't for a second think that's a mark against it.
An aspect of Rollerdrome that might go underappreciated is how good its platforming core is. If I ever had to go on Mastermind, I might pick "Subpar Extreme Sports Videogames" as much subject. I can tell you all about what sets a Thrasher: Skate and Destroy from a Shaun White's Skateboarding, and an Airblade from a Razor Freestyle Scooter. In all likelihood, there's a good chance I've set pretty decent scores on every level of any piece of crap you could think to mention. Rollerdrome really makes a mockery of Jet Set Radio. You're never fighting against the controls. It just flows effortlessly, and the levels are instantly readable. You're never knocking against a corner to try to line up a jump to a balcony. You just go do it, and it's done. It's reliable, and it builds your confidence to try wilder stuff. I've seen this stuff done wrong, or miss a beat so often, roll7 deserve to be praised for how good it feels to just move around the levels.
Rollerdrome is a lesson for the industry to learn from. Any wild concept can work as a game, if you really work at the design. They'd been making skateboarding games since the mid-eighties, but about a decade and a half of sex-out-of-tens later, Neversoft came out with something that everybody wanted to play. Action games don't have to be either God of War or Hotline Miami. We don't have to linger in the shadows of a handful of game concepts that really connected with a big audience, and we don't have to lean on art or story to make games that stand out. There's still space for genuine innovation in design, and you don't need to reengineer the wheel to do it. Tony Hawk's with a gun worked. Let's try the impossible ideas now.
(The video version of this is here)
Look, there's something wrong with my judgement. "Character action" games have never done it for me. Devil May Cry, Bayonetta, Ninja Gaiden. I just don't feel a connection between my button inputs and the mad flips and spins on-screen. Maybe that's because so much of my comfort is found in a completely different kind of action game - extreme sports. Games where jumps and spins are intrinsically linked to control and level design.
I didn't have faith that Rollerdrome would be any good when I first saw it. I've seen games offer the world on a plate with their concepts, but when you actually play them, they're something like My Friend Pedro. Gimmicky nonsense that leans hard on a couple wild moves that look good in trailers. Rollerdrome does not fall victim to this, and it's likely because roll7 understand extreme sports games. Tony Hawk's Pro Skater is often painted as just a good skateboarding game, but it's a massive success in designing a game that emphasizes points and combos with truly 3D gameplay. Something where environmental structure was really important, and had to be learned and mastered to squeeze out its full potential. That's the bones of Rollerdrome, with Hotline Miami and Quake III as its muscle and flesh.
This is a combo-based arena shooter where you fire sniper shots at jetpack guys and fuchikomas while backflipping off quarterpipes. It's a concept too cool to ever work, but it does. Momentum-based propulsion is the key. You're not steering while aiming. You set off in a direction and then line up your shot. If you need to make a sharp turn, you roll out of it. Rollerdrome makes judicious use of bullet time, and you don't have to worry about safe landings. You always land on your wheels, but lining up sequences that keep your flow going is always preferable. Remove any of these elements, and you'd have an unplayable mess with ideas above its system, but packaged together like this, it's a joy. Grinding and wallriding while steadying long-range shots across the map and pulling the trigger at the perfect moment - that's the game working at its full potential.
I don't know if a lot of people will connect with the game in the way I did, but as someone whose reliance on Tony Hawk's verges on the chemical, it's captivating to add so many new variables to the formula. Combos aren't about connecting sequences of tricks, but a series of kills. Tricks are there to regain your ammo. There's no real-world logic to the systems, and that's something to be lauded. You can learn a level inside out - where each new spawn will be, the most effective weapons against each enemy type, and the most efficient ways to line up combos - but there's so many dynamic little nuances to each part, I don't know if you could ever mathematically work out a formula and have each part of Rube Goldberg chain fall into place perfectly. There's always an aspect of flying by the seat of your pants. I have a path through Tony Hawk's 2's School 2 that's set in stone, but I don't know if I could ever get into that state of semi-conscious playing while revisiting a Rollerdrome level. It's a much looser, less predictable game. Don't for a second think that's a mark against it.
An aspect of Rollerdrome that might go underappreciated is how good its platforming core is. If I ever had to go on Mastermind, I might pick "Subpar Extreme Sports Videogames" as much subject. I can tell you all about what sets a Thrasher: Skate and Destroy from a Shaun White's Skateboarding, and an Airblade from a Razor Freestyle Scooter. In all likelihood, there's a good chance I've set pretty decent scores on every level of any piece of crap you could think to mention. Rollerdrome really makes a mockery of Jet Set Radio. You're never fighting against the controls. It just flows effortlessly, and the levels are instantly readable. You're never knocking against a corner to try to line up a jump to a balcony. You just go do it, and it's done. It's reliable, and it builds your confidence to try wilder stuff. I've seen this stuff done wrong, or miss a beat so often, roll7 deserve to be praised for how good it feels to just move around the levels.
Rollerdrome is a lesson for the industry to learn from. Any wild concept can work as a game, if you really work at the design. They'd been making skateboarding games since the mid-eighties, but about a decade and a half of sex-out-of-tens later, Neversoft came out with something that everybody wanted to play. Action games don't have to be either God of War or Hotline Miami. We don't have to linger in the shadows of a handful of game concepts that really connected with a big audience, and we don't have to lean on art or story to make games that stand out. There's still space for genuine innovation in design, and you don't need to reengineer the wheel to do it. Tony Hawk's with a gun worked. Let's try the impossible ideas now.
Sonic Adventure 2
2001
What a stupid video game
Saturnalia
2022
Having recently beat most of the of Silent Hill games and enjoying myself, they are fundamentally flawed games. Inherently linear, bad combat and mostly dated stories.
Saturnalia comes in with solutions for most of my hangups. Your free to explore this Itali an town, finding your own way into the story. Only being hunted by a monster, much like modern horror games like Amnesia and Alien. The stort itself is well written and compelling enough to keep you playing. The switching of characters is an interesting mechanic without becoming annoying.
The lack of puzzles is actually a positive for me and the couple of adventure game like puzzles that are there are mostly to have you run around instead of making you stuck.
Saturnalia comes in with solutions for most of my hangups. Your free to explore this Itali an town, finding your own way into the story. Only being hunted by a monster, much like modern horror games like Amnesia and Alien. The stort itself is well written and compelling enough to keep you playing. The switching of characters is an interesting mechanic without becoming annoying.
The lack of puzzles is actually a positive for me and the couple of adventure game like puzzles that are there are mostly to have you run around instead of making you stuck.
i was something like 10 yo or less when i went to my cousins house and he made me play this game and i INSTANTLY fell in love with it it was something that completely blew me away (i had my fair experience with some other game systems and such and i also bought a PS2 at the time but still it felt like nothing else i had ever played) so much so that i begged my cousin to lend me this game (that i never gave back and its still here in my room as a test of time and also the first and last copy of a game ive ever owned ) and finished it something like 10 to 20 times until my PS2 broke and this game fell into my long term memory until the other month when i realised that yes my new pc is capable of emulating it and went on this journey again after 10 years or so and it felt like i never left
as a boy who never played that many games in his youth and replayed a hundred times the same games i had no idea what the platformer genre was like so it probably took me more to finish this game than the 4 (?) hours that i spent on it but still its an elite time for this kind of genre
as a 3D platformer and a great one at that theres all sorts of move sets and combat styles and whatnot but here theres a mystical and forbidden aspect that i never even dared to touch...................... the collectathon
NOW i dont have strong positive feelings about collectathons i get bored after a while and they kind of feel cheap sometimes . i said sometimes people dont kill me (comment: WELL YOUVE NEVER PLAYED BANJO KAZOOIE , reply: its true) but this one OOOOOOF this one is in its own league entirely it has the PERFECT lenght the PERFECT game loop the PERFECT movement everything is just crafted in a way that makes the collectathon genre feel not like a slog for once
so lets just talk about the story and characters and then talk about why this is one of my fav games of all times
i end up thinking that every video game place that looks like the earth if not stated otherwise is the OG human earth for me so lets say this is a planet where theres a life force called eco (not to be confused with famous furry horror vn masterpiece echo) that fuels everything and everyone and was created by some kind of sentient beings called precursors which to this day im not so sure what they look like
anyway 2 people (ugly guy and hot and sexy maia) are using dark eco to kill everyone or something actually i have no idea maybe theyre just polluting the planet anyway so the green eco sage goes to 2 guys a mute 15 yo guy and his friend who got turned into an otter but like not really an otter more like a weasel that they call ottsel ...... speechless what a duo
anyway with the "help" of the green sage (realistically he just says every 3 mins WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU STILL HERE YOU SHOULD BE GETTING CELLSSSSSSSSSSS WHAT THE HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELL and gives 0 hands) and sexy hot and tempting keira (which they pronounce kiera ? dont ask) whos a skilled engineer got solid tits is jaks love interest and has the most obnoxious english VA ive ever heard thank god im italian whatever they have to save the other sages who are mysteriously vanished and beat the shit out of gol and to do so you have to fancy writing get cells
now what are cells . fuck if i know but theyre cool and very geometrically pleasing and hypothetically are a source of eco needed to traverse the land with keiras zoomer (shes gonna be like "oh im so sorry jak but my boobs are so stiff that you need 72 cells to move them out of the way" so you know how many you need to keep going) and also a medium for cool ass dramatic poses whenever you get one and theres also many ways to get them or it would get very boring EG find them exploring the world help villagers exchange them with orbs (another collectible that is basically coins and are also called globes/eggs in the italian translation why the fuck would you confuse me like that) complete platforming challenges fight enemies or find every scout fly in a level (yeah... another collectible..................) and so on
basically whatever the fuck you do in this game earns you a power cell even tho they pretend theyre some kind of artifact when in reality they be sitting on the shore just like that but yeah p much this is the whole gist of the game and honestly ? its the most fun ive ever had in my life since i was born its just so so so enjoyable and the sheer amount of movements you can make and mounts you can use just makes for a very diverse and interesting experience
eco is also not only an abstract whatever energy but has a role in the game like get blue eco > run faster/attract orbs get green eco > be cured and so on so yeah thats another really cool gameplay element
difficulty wise this isnt such a hard platformer even tho it gets somehow frustating later on in particular because the save points are scattered in a chaotic fashion and sometimes you just have to do whole platforming sessions without even a save point so yeah that can be tricky but you could also get good (something that i didnt do because i suck as a life statement)
story is alright this is def not my fav in the whole series and will never be but gets the gears going it has some moments some jokey jokes by kinda sexist machismo fueled self proclaimed casanova daxter who has always been kind of annoying but i end up loving him nonetheless this wouldnt be this fun without him around kind of like ace attorney larry butz effect but the 100% secret ending cliffhanger was something that ate me alive like why would you leave me longing for a continuation like that + jak getting famously cockblocked
what i do enjoy the most is that the world is interconnected and just walking in one direction can get you in another level and it just feels like this is just one big world instead of having a hub and level selection thats just something that entirely blew my mind and even tho now it can feel like something v bland it was unbelieavable at the time why am i talking like a 50 yo anyway yeah thats something that i had never seen in a platformer and to this day feels fresh and engaging and possibly contributes to the timeless feel that this experience holds in its palms
whats also timeless is the graphics that somehow didnt age ONE BIT its just like playing it in 2010 or something all over again its just UGHHHH the colors the character designs the world its just toooo much just too too much of an incredible game and i would just play it again and again and also in retrospect these graphics for 2001 were probably the second coming of christ for the people who lived through it so pay respect
i remembered the final boss battle as something grand and massive but it didnt live up to my nostalgia still it was an okay ish final fight so i wont complain on that
music is cool i like the music it IS simple and minimalistic but it still conveys the mood the game is trying to idle in beautifully + i got 0 music knowledge so you can basically make the most absolute garbage and id say its cool (olivia rodrigos album sitting at 0.5 in my RYM may want to say something about this so)
all in all its still the jak and daxter that i remember and hold dear in my heart and i just know i will get back to this game in the next years because i just cant get enough of this iconic duo
the big ass fish eating you alive when you get too far from the shore is the reason why i suffer from severe anxiety and panic attacks now
i loved the poses jak and daxter made when they got a cell so much that i used to try to replicate them and injure myself in parts of my body i didnt know existed
playing this on real engine with like 144p resolution on a 4:3 cathode ray tube TV was the pinnacle of gaming for me and id give my soul to anyone that would allow me to go back in time to those halcyon days
i dont usually play games in italian because i end up not liking it very much (not that different from the english voice acting i would always put the japanese dub if possible english is second base and italian is last resort) BUT this one i NEEDED to play in italian it felt like something was off while booting it in english it felt like it wasnt my jak and daxter and also because i know most quotes by heart so it was crushing with my consciousness so hard i rage quitted and switched to italian and fell into deep memory lane
i can recite the intro by heart look at me ho passato la vita cercando di dare risposte alle domande che mio padre e il padre di mio padre si erano posti inutilmente chi sono i precursor goes on
TRIGGER WARNING, THIRSTING
im gay rn because of jak and this game irreversibly shaped the kind of people im attracted to and even though hes kind of baby looking and innocent but still kinda cute and all in this game rest assured that i WILL be having a more convoluted and structured thirsting session on jak 2 and breathes heavily jak 3 so be prepared
me when jak: Not to vent or anything, but I’ve never had a boyfriend before. So I don’t know what to do!! I’ve been craving and burning to be held by a mAaAn!! My friend goth always looks at me like I’m weird when I tell him, so I need to bother someone else. Even he has a boyfriend! UGH!! I’ve never been too much of a fan of sports, but there’s a guy that I would mind shooting hoops for.. he was flirting with me and I completely missed it!! His names jock. But we figured things out and we’re together now! But..my friend goth the boyfriend he’s with I think I have a crush on. He’s really cute and I- my heart flutters when I’m near him. What should I do?
as a boy who never played that many games in his youth and replayed a hundred times the same games i had no idea what the platformer genre was like so it probably took me more to finish this game than the 4 (?) hours that i spent on it but still its an elite time for this kind of genre
as a 3D platformer and a great one at that theres all sorts of move sets and combat styles and whatnot but here theres a mystical and forbidden aspect that i never even dared to touch...................... the collectathon
NOW i dont have strong positive feelings about collectathons i get bored after a while and they kind of feel cheap sometimes . i said sometimes people dont kill me (comment: WELL YOUVE NEVER PLAYED BANJO KAZOOIE , reply: its true) but this one OOOOOOF this one is in its own league entirely it has the PERFECT lenght the PERFECT game loop the PERFECT movement everything is just crafted in a way that makes the collectathon genre feel not like a slog for once
so lets just talk about the story and characters and then talk about why this is one of my fav games of all times
i end up thinking that every video game place that looks like the earth if not stated otherwise is the OG human earth for me so lets say this is a planet where theres a life force called eco (not to be confused with famous furry horror vn masterpiece echo) that fuels everything and everyone and was created by some kind of sentient beings called precursors which to this day im not so sure what they look like
anyway 2 people (ugly guy and hot and sexy maia) are using dark eco to kill everyone or something actually i have no idea maybe theyre just polluting the planet anyway so the green eco sage goes to 2 guys a mute 15 yo guy and his friend who got turned into an otter but like not really an otter more like a weasel that they call ottsel ...... speechless what a duo
anyway with the "help" of the green sage (realistically he just says every 3 mins WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU STILL HERE YOU SHOULD BE GETTING CELLSSSSSSSSSSS WHAT THE HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELL and gives 0 hands) and sexy hot and tempting keira (which they pronounce kiera ? dont ask) whos a skilled engineer got solid tits is jaks love interest and has the most obnoxious english VA ive ever heard thank god im italian whatever they have to save the other sages who are mysteriously vanished and beat the shit out of gol and to do so you have to fancy writing get cells
now what are cells . fuck if i know but theyre cool and very geometrically pleasing and hypothetically are a source of eco needed to traverse the land with keiras zoomer (shes gonna be like "oh im so sorry jak but my boobs are so stiff that you need 72 cells to move them out of the way" so you know how many you need to keep going) and also a medium for cool ass dramatic poses whenever you get one and theres also many ways to get them or it would get very boring EG find them exploring the world help villagers exchange them with orbs (another collectible that is basically coins and are also called globes/eggs in the italian translation why the fuck would you confuse me like that) complete platforming challenges fight enemies or find every scout fly in a level (yeah... another collectible..................) and so on
basically whatever the fuck you do in this game earns you a power cell even tho they pretend theyre some kind of artifact when in reality they be sitting on the shore just like that but yeah p much this is the whole gist of the game and honestly ? its the most fun ive ever had in my life since i was born its just so so so enjoyable and the sheer amount of movements you can make and mounts you can use just makes for a very diverse and interesting experience
eco is also not only an abstract whatever energy but has a role in the game like get blue eco > run faster/attract orbs get green eco > be cured and so on so yeah thats another really cool gameplay element
difficulty wise this isnt such a hard platformer even tho it gets somehow frustating later on in particular because the save points are scattered in a chaotic fashion and sometimes you just have to do whole platforming sessions without even a save point so yeah that can be tricky but you could also get good (something that i didnt do because i suck as a life statement)
story is alright this is def not my fav in the whole series and will never be but gets the gears going it has some moments some jokey jokes by kinda sexist machismo fueled self proclaimed casanova daxter who has always been kind of annoying but i end up loving him nonetheless this wouldnt be this fun without him around kind of like ace attorney larry butz effect but the 100% secret ending cliffhanger was something that ate me alive like why would you leave me longing for a continuation like that + jak getting famously cockblocked
what i do enjoy the most is that the world is interconnected and just walking in one direction can get you in another level and it just feels like this is just one big world instead of having a hub and level selection thats just something that entirely blew my mind and even tho now it can feel like something v bland it was unbelieavable at the time why am i talking like a 50 yo anyway yeah thats something that i had never seen in a platformer and to this day feels fresh and engaging and possibly contributes to the timeless feel that this experience holds in its palms
whats also timeless is the graphics that somehow didnt age ONE BIT its just like playing it in 2010 or something all over again its just UGHHHH the colors the character designs the world its just toooo much just too too much of an incredible game and i would just play it again and again and also in retrospect these graphics for 2001 were probably the second coming of christ for the people who lived through it so pay respect
i remembered the final boss battle as something grand and massive but it didnt live up to my nostalgia still it was an okay ish final fight so i wont complain on that
music is cool i like the music it IS simple and minimalistic but it still conveys the mood the game is trying to idle in beautifully + i got 0 music knowledge so you can basically make the most absolute garbage and id say its cool (olivia rodrigos album sitting at 0.5 in my RYM may want to say something about this so)
all in all its still the jak and daxter that i remember and hold dear in my heart and i just know i will get back to this game in the next years because i just cant get enough of this iconic duo
the big ass fish eating you alive when you get too far from the shore is the reason why i suffer from severe anxiety and panic attacks now
i loved the poses jak and daxter made when they got a cell so much that i used to try to replicate them and injure myself in parts of my body i didnt know existed
playing this on real engine with like 144p resolution on a 4:3 cathode ray tube TV was the pinnacle of gaming for me and id give my soul to anyone that would allow me to go back in time to those halcyon days
i dont usually play games in italian because i end up not liking it very much (not that different from the english voice acting i would always put the japanese dub if possible english is second base and italian is last resort) BUT this one i NEEDED to play in italian it felt like something was off while booting it in english it felt like it wasnt my jak and daxter and also because i know most quotes by heart so it was crushing with my consciousness so hard i rage quitted and switched to italian and fell into deep memory lane
i can recite the intro by heart look at me ho passato la vita cercando di dare risposte alle domande che mio padre e il padre di mio padre si erano posti inutilmente chi sono i precursor goes on
TRIGGER WARNING, THIRSTING
im gay rn because of jak and this game irreversibly shaped the kind of people im attracted to and even though hes kind of baby looking and innocent but still kinda cute and all in this game rest assured that i WILL be having a more convoluted and structured thirsting session on jak 2 and breathes heavily jak 3 so be prepared
me when jak: Not to vent or anything, but I’ve never had a boyfriend before. So I don’t know what to do!! I’ve been craving and burning to be held by a mAaAn!! My friend goth always looks at me like I’m weird when I tell him, so I need to bother someone else. Even he has a boyfriend! UGH!! I’ve never been too much of a fan of sports, but there’s a guy that I would mind shooting hoops for.. he was flirting with me and I completely missed it!! His names jock. But we figured things out and we’re together now! But..my friend goth the boyfriend he’s with I think I have a crush on. He’s really cute and I- my heart flutters when I’m near him. What should I do?
HOLY SHIT
Chrome Dino
2014
One of the games of all time